It seems like the Rio Olympics are going to be pretty rocky this year. Of course, most of the time people say that and it ends up being fine. But the combination of political/economic unrest in Brazil + Zika + what seems like a lack of preparation = a messy start, at the very least. In fact, it seems like the least of Brazil’s worries will be the Opening Ceremony, traditionally the showpiece “coming out” for a country on a massive world stage. The Beijing Olympic ceremony is probably the standard every summer Olympics is held to these days, but every country is different, and every country wants to showcase what is specifically “theirs.” So what will Brazil be showcasing for their Opening Ceremony? Gisele Bundchen. And muggers? From Deadspin/Google Translate:
Another curiosity was on account of a passage where Gisele Bündchen, parading to the sound of “The Girl from Ipanema”, will be assailed by an actor. In the end, however, the message of this scene will be peace.
The musicality, always exalting Brazilian artists, will soon be seen in the beginning, when Paulinho da Viola will perform the national anthem with voice and guitar. Following, a dance show with hundreds of artists will recreate the first moments of the history of the country at the Maracana field: the symbols of the first centuries will be present.
Still in the first hour reserved for the performing arts, the flight of a replica of the plane 14 Bis draw the attention of all. Soon after, the course is free for a parade of more than 100 meters from top international Gisele Bündchen. At this time, there will be a simulation of assault and even persecution.
According to Deadspin, this might just be a weird translation, but it really does seem like there will be some sort of “assault” and “robbery” on Gisele, and…? I don’t even know. Deadspin also notes that there will be a celebration of Brazil’s “clichés,” “ranging from samba to slaves (?).” You know one thing I always associate with Brazil? Excellent plastic surgery. Perhaps they can find a way to work that into the Opening, maybe with a dancing implant? Just a suggestion. The NY Post also suggests that the Opening Ceremony might not be safe for work, because there will be many “nearly naked women” dancing the samba. Thankfully for all of the pearl-clutchy American viewers, NBC is employing a one-hour delay. Just enough time to put black bars and blurs all over the jiggling, I would assume.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
Hah, figures the networks would freak out about seeing some women dancing the samba, but they have no issues giving a walking Cheeto like Trump plenty of air-time. 😛
In all seriousness, I am curious to see how these Olympics play out. Every story coming out of Rio so far has been horrible, what with athletes being mugged, the housing being inadequate, police corruption, and etc.
Don’t forget the raw sewage! I know the Olympics are only once every four years, but if I were an athlete I would seriously consider skipping Rio.
Three teaspoons will make you seriously sick. I feel sorry for those athletes. Yuck!
NBC coverage is terrible which is why I watch the olympics live. The difference is amazing
I’m from Brazil and it is a shame that the mayor of Rio did such a lousy job. It’s embarrassing.
A one-hour delay? Because of boobs or something else? Because that would be ridiculous. And I hope someone f*cked up the tranlsation or someone is trolling because that sounds all kinds of stupid. Don’t do it, Giselle.
Oh wait, it’s because of the womenz? “NBC’s delayed broadcast is a tradition it has maintained for 20 years largely because it believes its audience, which is mostly female, watches sports differently from men.”
“Women watch sports differently than men”? Oh yes, of course, I’m usually sitting upright while my husband is reclining on the sofa. That must be what they mean, right? LOL
Ncboudicca, I’m sure you are correct! : )
Just hope everyone is safe, all the stories I’ve read suggests in different ways this Olympics is worse off than Sochi.
the IOC is just as bad as the FIFA. they make a mockery out of these international sports events, selling them to the highest bidder, no matter the human rights violations, environmental issues etc. Winter Olympics in subtropical Sotchi, now sailing on the the open sewers of Rio de Janeiro and next up we have soccer in the desert of Quatar, in stadiums brought to you by real slave labour. thats what they call Fair Play™. smh.
The timing has been awful. When the Olympics and the World Cup were given to Brazil, They were going through this big economic moment, but now they’re in a very unstable position both economically and politically.
This.
The whole country is beautiful, but it is a big mess.
My friend got there about a month ago, he is a journalist. He did not get mugged, its not like its third world country, but poverty, prostitution and drugs are everywhere. He is not scared of getting mugged, but when he got to the hotel, he got sort of a map where to go, who to talk to.
He did pick up a girl. But she was a prostitute, also, very cheap as in few dollars… Sad.
*Hitting the Staples red button on this sh*t* Im kinda Officially sitting these Olympics out! Sorry to the athletes and stuff but this is at this point no different than gawking at a slow wreck, the setting, the Russian Doping, Zika, only way this gets worse is Terror and frankly with the Police forces sorta abdicating… Why wouldn’t that happen?? i Mean Bless the Athletes and stuff But I can’t watch this ill advised poorly planned Sh*tshow, Brazil Im sure is a Beautiful place but that’s a country in crisis of many levels this is stupid, the few coins they could theoretically get doesn’t justify the means nor ends
Usually I’m an Olympic viewer –like the ceremonies, back stories on athletes, etc..but this year I’m really shrugging about the whole thing. I don’t know if it’s because of the constant tales of problems surrounding the event, or maybe it’s just me…
I feel the same. I usually love the olympics and follow them on all the different channels and online, and I LOVE medal ceremonies. but this year I can’t get hype. almost all the news out of rio leading up has been bad to crazy, and it’s definitely a damper on the excitement.
I also feel the same. I don’t have the desire to watch. Especially what the gov’t need to the people there. They moved about 80,000 people out of there homes where they’ve lived for generations so they could build for the olympics. I really think they should cancel them, with the zinka virus and their polluted waters. One reporter said if they wanted to have a widespread virus through out the world, the olympics in Rio could very well do it. If you can watch Real Sport w/ Bryant Gumbel, they have a really good story on it.
Maybe they could have her getting mugged while going to the plastic surgeon? Oh wait that was in Paris….
LOL!!! But how could we tell it her when she was wearing a burqa? Cue the eye roll..
Ohmygod, lest we forget, she paired said burqa with sandals!!! Glorious. And the dancing implant suggestion made my whole life. YAAAAASSSS!!
I do think some of the horrors of Rio de Janeiro are being blown out of proportion. A friend just returned from a month there. Never got mugged. No floating garbage in the water and the athletes she saw were satisfied with their venues. Obviously it won’t be that way across the board, but I am going to wait and see before crying catastrophe.
Interesting to hear. I really don’t know what to make of it, was feeling generally pretty meh about the games this year. Although seeing my son’s SI cover with the Team USA athletes on it sparked my interest in it a little bit.
There are always stories about how horribly it will all go in Russia it was a disaster leading up to it. Britain was having the ‘most dangerous Olympics ever’ and had cold water thrown on them by Mitt Romney and that embarrassing 7/7 controversy. China was sensorship, a threat to the freedom of the athletes and spectators and probably construction delays and the like. So we will see…
Our Olympics (London) were GREAT. Boris Johnson ripped the piss out of Romney, the opening ceremony was so beautiful and so British, and everything went so well. (The 7/7 controversy was NBC’s fault, for not showing the tribute to US viewers.) How we went from that to Brexit in four short years I’ll never know.
Sorry as an American it was deeply embarrassing that a major news network protested a tribute to people who has recently been killed IN THAT CITY and it was somehow insulting to the people who died on 9/11. It was not a good look (“More people died in ours so yours only deserve a small mention behind 9/11 victims. Plus, it happened here, to us! How many American Heros died in yours?”) It was shameful apparently to the point I still have strong feelings about it.
London went perfectly. I remember Mitt Romney’s comments because that was one of the two things I loved about his campaign. When he talked about places it sounded like an alien writing a guidebook. I know he commented on the fact you all live in unbelievably tiny houses. There was something else and Michigan had perfectly sized trees.
But I do remember chatter here that it was going to go horribly and the NSA was warning a few CEOs not to go and they pulled out despite being a sponsor. It wasn’t anywhere near the coverage the other two got.
Anyways my point wasn’t that the London Olympics was bad in anyway. I am saying you can’t tell how it’s going to go until it starts. Plus, it’s is a fun news narrative. It’s going to be a disaster… Oh, no, wait! The whole world came together and made it a success! Go us! Trick in some viewers who want to see this fail.
Tina: London really WAS amazing. I worked in and out of the village with my country’s team and it was superb. Great facilities, so easy to get around, so smooth and flawless admin-wise….
That said there’s always Sturm und drang about the Olympics and they always manage to get through it fine. Even Sydney moved a bunch of people out of town so they wouldn’t be around for the games, it was disgusting. Of course the so called ‘less desirable’ countries have a lot more issues but it always seems to pull together.
@Julies29
I agree I know many who go from here for long periods but all say use common sense. If you go with gold Rolex and diamonds then yeah something might happen but most I speak to say it’s great. I would love to go it’s on my wish list of places to see. I will be watching and I have my little flag at work because I must see the Track and Field.. gooooooooo Alison.
A friend of mine was shot and killed in Rio last year, he was a tourist who happened to get lost…. I find the “mugging” gag in poor taste…but as a fellow South America I know that some of the reports are probably exaggerated and the athletes will be okay in regards to that issue.
Im so sorry that happened to your friend 🙁
The IOC sucks. That’s all I’ve got. I really want to sit these Olympics out but we have TWO hometown girls competing this year and I want to watch them compete.
As a South African all this negativity feels all too familiar. I remember all the negativity surrounding the 2010 football world cup being hosted here. People (by people I mean western media) were questioning whether we (an African country) could host a decent event; there were doubts about safety and whether we would be ready in time; most of which were outright outrageous reports. It got to a point, where our media would run daily reports about all the negative, fear inducing reports from outside (western) media. However, reports coming during and after the tournament were overwhelmingly positive, we were ready ahead of time, the tournament was run without any major incidents and was generally a success.
What I am saying is that I am going to give Brazil the benefit of the doubt, because it appears that we are only hearing “a single story” here, one not coming from Brazilians themselves.
“The single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.” – chimamanda adichie
I was on the same boat as you, but Brazilians themselves aren’t exactly thrilled about this. I’d link the article but it was in Spanish. But long story short: Brazil is going through one of their biggest crisis right now, because of a snowball effect that has been going on for years, and hosting BOTH of the most important spot events in the world in a row isn’t helping matters.
You’d think seeing their country like that would boost patriotism, but it’s hard to think like that when you see your govt spending millions on sport facilities that will remain completely unused after the Olympics, while there’s a zika infestation (among others).
This doesn’t mean that if you go to Rio you’ll find people running in circles and houses being burned down to ashes. Ofc there’s tons of Brazilians who actually are excited for this. But looking at the facts straight – measuring the pros and cons – it’s really hard to argue hosting both of these events was a good idea.
Maybe the Olympics themselves will turn out fine, but all the expenses they meant already took it’s toll on Brazil.
Yes, and the crisis got worse after what happened with Dilma. It is very sad what is happening in Brazil, it is such a beautiful place and people are super nice.
As a brazilian I can definitely say we are not thrilled about this, or were about the world cup as a matter of fact.
Our government is a mess and a joke, and we dont trust anything that comes out of it. As for zika I can’t really say much because my region hasn’t really been that affected by it, so for me is just not a reality that I have to deal with, but i’m sure that the states that are having it rough aren’t pleased about the lack of focus.
However i do believe that everything can work out fine in the end, brazilians have something that we call “the Brazilian way”, in which we just makes things work, even doing it wrongly and when all the odds are against it. They dont put in the effort but in the end they make it work, its a horrible cultural behaviour actually. We are mainly just angry all this money was spent and corrupted, although the money would probably “disappear” on the politicians hands with or without the olympics.
As for the Gisele thing, it wanst a robber, it was one of the sales people that roam the beach selling havaianas, bikinis and etc, which is very commom and not violent. But when they were watching people thought she was being robbed so they cut it.
I read about this is in a Portuguese-language newspaper and actually they said that it was not at all suppose to look like an “assault” but like a bikini seller trying to convince Gisele into buying…still sounds kinda strange? Anyway, they were also reporting that since a lot of people thought it look like an assault they will exclude that part from the opening.
Last month I returned from spending two months in Rio. You absolutely cannot tell that there is a political crisis or a recession from being in the city, the feeling on the steets is that it is vibrant and thriving. It’s like Zika doesn’t exist either. We got bit by mosquitos a couple times. We’re all fine. Not to minimise the tragedy of what the virus has done to mothers and babies. Just saying that when you’re there it’s quite a contrast from the hysteria in the media. As for being mugged, you need to know where not to go at certain times. You stay out of the business district on weekends when it shuts down. Don’t wander at night, etc. Muggings don’t tend to be violent, it’s a grab and run. They come from the favellas, they are poor. And I didn’t see exposed bodies either, beyond the beach, which itself wasn’t the thong parade I expected. Some but not a lot. People dress very casually and workout clothes are the uniform for all shapes and ages; if you want to look like a tourist wear maxi dresses and florals – locals don’t dress like that. I fell in love with Rio and highly recommended it as a must see destination where you get the stunning beaches, mountains, city and culture all in one. Oh and the food is fantastic. And you drink coconut water right from the coconut with a straw. It’s a dream..
right. with money, it’s kinda nice almost anywhere in the world. if you are not safe to walk the streets at night or use public transportation, and that is what people with a lesser budget are forced to do, then no, the super fresh coconut is not going to make me cheer for rio de janeiro and their shitty city council.
+1
That’s the perception you had because you visited Rio as a foreigner with money. It’s like if I went to LA, saw a group of blacks and whites talking to each other just fine, and deduced the racial tension in the USA is just some media myth. The reality of the people actually living there is radically different.
As a fellow South American I know European and American media likes to paint us as some uncivilized hell hole on the verge of anarchy, which is quite far from the truth, but our issues are definitely real. Brazil is going through a very ugly moment in it’s history.
What.
The bar is really low these days. It is not that difficult to fiind someone who can speak, read and write in Porteguese. Deadspin, put an ad in Craigslist. I’m sure you could have found someone to translate for you.
Seeing as Gawker is in bankruptcy. No I think they’ll have to tough it out with free online translation.
as a brazilian i’m really anxious about the opening and the rest of the games.
{Brazilian here}
The original report doesn’t have many details, people are trying really hard to keep everything secret. So even for us is hard to understand the context.
From what I could gather: Gisele will be walking when a boy approaches her. Then, some sort of policeman thinks this interaction is an assault, goes after the boy. Then the boy is protected from the policeman by Gisele herself. Everyone is happy.
Hope that made the report clearer! Although I’m also puzzled as to why this would be featured at the Opening Ceremony? Oh well
Thank you! Lol. How easy was that to find a translator? For free. Honesly, Craigslist has a section where people can barter. For example, translate this for Deadspin and we’ll credit you on our website. Negotiate to have your picture included. People love to be recognized.
You’re welcome 🙂
Also, just read that the scene will likely be cut from the official presentation, due to all the negative comments about it.
From my personal experience (I was there about 4 years ago), Rio is not different to any other huge city, in the sense that as long as you’re not reckless you’ll be fine. Also, Brazilians have to be some of the nicest people I’ve ever met.
About the Olympics, I won’t judge until I watch it, because as some have pointed in upper posts, there have been similar stories about South Africa, Sochi, Beijing…
PG, wow. That is very interesting. Thank you.
Also, Gisele looks so beautiful. She has such lovely skin. I wonder if she had a forehead lift instead of a blepharoplasty.
Sorry, not seeing beauty in any of those photos.
Gisele has already been assaulted – by filler! Her face! She looks like Claire Danes, not Gisele. Bwahahaha
I was thinking she looks like Sarah Jessica Parker in the ’90s!
The weirdest thing here will be to watch the priestess for healthy diet, the one forbidding MSG, or processed food to cross her lips into her pristine body, parading in a stadium filled with Coca cola and Mc Donalds logos. Don’t forget people, I endorse them, I just don’t eat them.
She doesn’t endorse them. And do you think those athletes eat fast food? Coca Cola and McDonald’s? Strange comment.
They do once they’ve finished competing! The maccas in the London village food hall regularly ran out of items once the events started finishing.
Most of them do. McDonalds in the Olympic villages is huge, many of the athletes eat every meal there.
No. She will NOT be “assaulted”… It’s not true. All these negative comments and negative stories… It’s so sad.
And NBC is employing a one-hour delay? What?
The lead up to these Olympics has been such a car crash.
In spite of all the unrest that Brazil is going through, and the lack of preparedness, I find it really offensive and ignorant to sum up a beautiful and diverse culture to “plastic surgery” and “mugging”…
Greece and Beijing had a crazy amount go wrong too. Beijing was far more messed up than Brazil, but they had the money to put on a good show so people ignored a lot of the problems. London and Sydney had some major issues too. The Olympics are pretty much synonymous with mass corruption and extreme waste, and even in the wealthiest first world countries, there’s always health concerns and sanitation issues.
It seems like this is the first time it’s been a big story in the US though. Perhaps because you don’t have as many medal hopefuls this year?
What health concerns/major issues/sanitation issues were there in London and/or Sydney? None of those applied in those two cities (nor in Vancouver).