We’ve gotten a good look at most of the September issue covers this year, and let me tell you… magazines are going full-throttle with bland white women. Like, Cara Delevingne got TWO major September issue covers and she’s just got a small part in Suicide Squad. I like that InStyle put Kerry Washington on their September cover for no other reason than I enjoy seeing diversity on the September issues. Interestingly enough, Kerry talks about how that kind of tokenism makes her feel within the interview. It’s a really good piece, no surprise, because she’s an intelligent and admirable young woman. Some highlights:
Competition between women: “I feel like there is a misconception of this catty, competitiveness between women. That has not been my experience, particularly in Shondaland. My mother is one of seven kids…so I have a lot of strong women in my family, and I have supportive, beautiful relationships with all of them.”
The only woman in the room: “Being the one woman in the room should not be seen as a victory. If there’s only one of us in the room, we’re still a token; we don’t actually have an empowered voice. If there’s two of us, we’re still a minority. If there’s three… then we’re allowed to have a multiplicity of opinions.”
Graduating from Spence (an elite NY school): “From the time I was 11 or 12, everyone [at school] was like, ‘You are so lucky to be here.’ And I was lucky, but so were they. They were lucky I was there because I gave them an expanded idea of what humanity looks like, feels like, and how it expresses itself.”
She doesn’t want a color-blind world: “I don’t want to not be African. The goal is to live in a world where my race doesn’t limit my access, where I can see myself represented in the highest level of society without any limitation.”
How she thinks about social change: “I choose to feel optimistic, because I don’t think I could get out of bed if I didn’t. The key will be when we stop allowing our otherness to separate us. Whether it’s immigrant’s rights, women’s rights, civil rights, or LGBT rights, we’re all under attack, because none of us belongs to that small group who have held power for a very long time.”
Pregnancy fashion: “There’s nothing high-end for professional women who are pregnant, so for the show, we wind up just buying the same clothes. We will cut out the front of Armani trousers and put in a pregnancy panel. That’s what we do for everything.” Off-screen, finding fashionable maternity clothes has been much easier, thanks to her famous friend Jessica Alba. “She told me she had this box of maternity clothes that she would ship from girlfriend to girlfriend. I was like, ‘Can I have it?’ And then I started doing it as well. I’m not getting clothes back that I wore the first time. Everybody adds cute stuff to the box. You’re less afraid to spend money because you feel that a lot of people are going to use it.”
“From the time I was 11 or 12, everyone was like, ‘You are so lucky to be here.’” Jesus, that sucks. And you know that’s Kerry trying to put a nice spin on years of racist microaggressions too, from being told that she should be grateful to be included in a wealthy, white world, to the surprise she still gets that she is, in fact, a college graduate. What shocks me is that she chooses to feel optimism in the face of so much bulls—t. I love this too: “If there’s only one of us in the room, we’re still a token; we don’t actually have an empowered voice.”
Photos courtesy of WENN, InStyle.
I think she’s beautiful, but man, that cover is awful: why so much Photoshop? Her face looks plastic. I remember reading in Tina Fey’s book that it doesn’t really matter that it’s Photoshop, since everyone knows it and understands that the actual skin looks different. But wouldn’t it just be simpler for everyone if we understood it AND saw it?
Kerry is always beautiful.
And I agree with you and I disagree with Fey on this. While we may logically understand photoshop, it is still presented as real and aspirational.
Our brains process information in a way that isnt always logical because we use hueristics or mental shortcuts.
There was a study that looked at partner satisfaction. When shown many photos of more ‘attractive’ people, partners rated their own spouse as less attractive. When shown photos of average or less attractive people, they rated their spouse as more attractive.
You subconsciously are always ranking the people around you and your place in that ranking. If you increase your exposure to unrealistic representations of normalcy you begin to change that ranking system, skewing what is normal to lower rankings and elevating manufactured images to the most desirable.
In addition, while adults should(might) know the difference, it’s frequently very hard to tell. And children definitely aren’t looking at photos thinking ‘well she’s not that skinny in real life’ or what have you.
So BS Tina Fey, total BS.
That is one of the things I disagree with her on. I’m an adult and unless the Photoshop is very bad or very heavy handed, I can’t tell it’s been done. I believe my eyes on some level, even though I know PS has been used.
She sounds like an intelligent, thoughtful woman who also happens to be a stunning beauty. The wiglet/hairpiece in the photoshoot is pretty bad, though.
Yes the hair is TERRIBLE! So bad that is *almost* distracts from her stunningly beautiful face. It doesn’t quite manage but you know it’s bad when it comes close!
I honestly think she is one of the most beautiful women in the world. Her face is absolutely captivating. But the best thing about her isn’t her beauty, it’s her intelligence. I also like that she has this calm elegance to her.
Those “TT” schools seemingly promote diversity and create inclusivity, but in a vipers nest of ubercompetitiveness, entitlement, and mega wealth, the ugliness comes through, especially in middle and high school. When it comes to 11-12 yr olds, racism is coming from the parents, further proving that the racism in this country, currently highlighted by Trump, is by no means limited to the south, the disenfranchised, and/or the uneducated.
I would add though that it depends a lot on the school and its values as well. I attended a school like this and NEVER heard of anything like this being said. It was just not part of the culture to parse who was “luckier” to be in attendance. If anything I truly believe that the vast majority of us felt lucky to be in a diverse and welcoming school where we did have a multiplicity of opinions and where that was encouraged and supported. It also helped that that was the reputation of the school and most parents who chose it believed in those values. Spence is not (or at least was not when I was in school) known for a message of diversity and inclusiveness.
I had a different experience from Jenny except I think the racism came more from certain administrators and members of the board of directors. There were kids from diverse backgrounds with scholarships but they were made to know their place. Their work study jobs were always in plain view of the other students while the white “sports recruits” we’re given summer jobs or jobs in the office.
I don’t quite agree with you. Racism can come from so many different sources under so many different guises. It doesn’t matter what the stance of the school is.
When I was applying to Oxford, I remember a teachers saying to me, “it will be easier for you to get in then white students, as you tick a lot of the diversity boxes” (south Asian, from a poor neighbourhood, woman). I found it really insulting. It was also not true. I had to get straight A’s, have an amazing interview, essay and references as well as extra curricular activities.
However Oxford accepts students from public schools, with lesser grades, no references or extra curricular activities. And despite all of this, Eton boys acted like they were entitled to be there and I was the lucky one to get in. Even though I had worked twice as hard to get there and definitely deserved it more.
Role model! She’s lovely.
Love the idea of a pregnancy box! Don’t love her hair in that photo shoot though. Love you Kerry! You look gorgeous with any hairstyle!
I did this with one of my sisters and my cousin. We were all about the same size and all worked at high brow law firms in NYC. Those kinds of maternity clothes are expensive! It worked out really great we all added stuff plus the best pregnancy pillow called “Frankie”
I love her! She’s talented and intelligent. I’m going to buy this issue of InStyle just for this interview. Love the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants pregnancy box idea. Brilliant!
Fantastic woman, ALWAYS effed over in the pics for some reason
That Pregnancy box Idea is fabulous
Let’s Unpack my bag about Microaggressions: This week My Boss called me into my office to show me this “old timey song” turned out to be a video of Al Jolson singing “yes we have no Bananas” in Blackface… I Lost My Entire Sh*t on this dude on the spot, IDK if he thought i wouldn’t understand/know what I was seeing cause he thinks of me aas “model minority Latina First” or some such sh*t but yeah, it’s been a banner week, he’s apologized about 34 different ways and tried me with an ” I hope you weren’t off… – STOP RIGHT THE FUCK THERE YES I WAS, THAT WAS DISGUSTING AND GROSS
I can’t believe your boss did that.
Umm…I’m not sure there was anything “micro” about that aggression. I mean…I need a “WTF?!?” gif. Good for you for calling him on it, if anything you were too kind.
Yeah, that qualifies as a macro aggression for sure… Very weird.
Um WTF? I can’t believe your boss did that and I’m sorry you had to deal with that. Is there an HR department you can report him to? Because that is seriously messed up.
Nah, Sole Practicioner, but why he’s asked me every day this week if I’m going to sue him?? Like one of the 6 Apologies was about minimizing and saying ” So.. That is.. How Minstrel Shows Used to be” – STOP Do not minimize/mansplain this sh*t I KNOW what I saw and what it means and it was Incredibly Offensive and disgusting so let’s not do this apology rn I have Absolutely nothing to say
Second Apology was about how he couldn’t sleep with this heavy heart * Slow Blinks* OK good
I’m not here to comfort this Motherf*cker in this his Hour of Need and to me More than even knowing that sh*t the fact that he THOUGHT he could show me that and I’d be in the dark cause i’m a foreigner OR that he THINKS this is something I should Soother HIM about THAT is what makes me blow my entire top, i’m gonna continue making it mad uncomfortable well into next week
i think that is horrible. why would he do that if he thought you had a case to sue him? how stupid is that? i’m sorry that some people are so ignorant.
I hope he doesn’t sleep for a month.
That’s really f-king weird and off. Why is he showing your videos in the first place why that particular one? Is he a stupid asshole or deliberately trying to hurt/undermine you?
Holy sh*t. What in the hell was your boss even thinking? That’s really awful.
Kerry is so lovely and intelligent, and the pregnancy box is awesome.
Oh my god, that is some serious crap there with your boss. I’ll tell you one that happen to me.
My former boss brought me her copy of the book “The Help” explaining that it reminded her of that time period and how her family had someone so nice that came in to do cleaning, etc.
wtffffffffffffffffffffff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yep I was like WTF? I could go on about some of the microaggressions I experienced some them were textbook cases. I didn’t realize how many I experienced until I left the job.
Sigh. This sounds so familiar. My beautiful stepdaughter (who looks like America Ferrera) attends a private school that is the local equivalent of Spence and she is f-cking miserable. She is not scholarship – her father pays full tuition, so it isn’t a class issue. She is short and dark-complexioned and curvy…meanwhile all the white girls there are tall and blond and horsey-looking, and things just get more cutthroat from there. There is lots of discrimination going on at that school but everyone is so well-mannered that they are able to hide it.
Everyone is polite and nice to my stepdaughter, but no one is friendly and she gets almost zero social invitations. People also decline her invitations. It’s all very insular and clubby, which basically means excluding people who look like her. Meanwhile she is only 13 and doesn’t understand why she has almost no friends, because at her last school – a public elementary school with 25% fee lunch – she had lots of friends. It’s heartbreaking to see her get excluded and not understand why. If she were my daughter I would have switched her to a nicer school by now!
Some White people think that because they’re polite, you can’t see what they are really thinking.
I’m from a Latin country and attended a private school in Connecticut and I can completely relate to your stepdaughter! The WASPy blondes did not want anything to do with any of the (very few) POC, Jewish, or white scholarship students. It was like two schools in one. They were on every committee, and automatically the presidents of all the clubs. I remember they purposefully scheduled a photo day for a club I was in on a day when I was having dental surgery and that was the picture used in the yearbook, of course. A dozen blonde, beaming little angels with no icky ethnic fouling it up.
This is why I have such an intense dislike of Taylor Swift. I know her kind and I know their tactics.
OMG! Why are kids so effing mean??
Wow I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I didn’t go to elite private schools but even in my public high school that was slowly becoming too ethnic (too many asian kids mottling the sea of white), I felt uncomfortable resentment from the cliquey waspy kids. and of course there was the old high school teacher who expressed concern that my English wouldn’t be good enough for the advanced placement history class (even though I was born in the US and had been speaking English for a good long while). I ultimately got an A in his stupid class and a 5 on the test.
That’s so awful. Give your stepdaughter a kiss from me.
It’s also illuminating to me. I was a working class scholarship girl at a very posh British private school. These have such a reputation for snobbery. But my experience there (and I think also the experience of the non-white but rich pupils) was entirely different. I was welcomed and nurtured by staff and fellow pupils alike and never felt out of place, unwanted, friendless or micro-aggressed at all. My friends all came to stay in my plebby little house during the holidays and I went to all their mansions. The difference was never even mentioned.
I have a great many criticisms of the British private school system and the way it dominates routes to success in many areas of British life, shutting out state school pupils. But the environment they created for me, a non-elite pupil, certainly isn’t one of them. Friends I made at that school are friends today.
Cara Delevigne got two magazine cover for 20 min in ridiculous movie. Okay.
Kerry Washington is always thoughtful and optimistic, considering how condescending her classmates were, I would have been harsher.
Add that to the ‘you speak so well’ list of micro aggressions.
Though in my experiences, the micro aggressions started after I graduated from university and started my first job.
I was really confused to begin with because racism wasn’t overt like you see on TV/movies/novels, but every day some apparently well meaning white person would be surprised (and express it) that *as a black person* I was well spoken, well educated, dressed well, intelligent, played other sports not basketball, didn’t listen to rap etc and so forth list of what black people are supposed to be.
What they knew about Africa was even less. For goodness’s sake, I arrived on a plane, how else do you think I arrived here? and no, we don’t live in mud huts nor are we starving and destitute.
I get the ‘you speak so well’, too. I was an exchange student in New Jersey and the Anthropology Professor told me, in front of the whole class, she was surprised I was so fluent in English, and impressed at my vocabulary. To which I responded “why wouldn’t I be when I attended a top British school back home and speak the language since the age of 3?” She was unable to answer my question. However I was unable to recognise the aggression as such.
I didn’t get any of that as a class-underprivileged person at school either, LAK (see above).
I read all this micro-aggression stuff carefully, terrified unless I ever say anything so witless myself.
Sixer: my micro aggression expriences didn’t start until I started working.
School/university was wonderful. Exactly as you’ve described upthread. And most of my friends are drawn from people I was at school/uni with.
These days I judge it according to whether I think the person saying it is really stupidly ignorant (urban dictionary definition) or simply uninformed and it’s a teaching moment.
It’s weird, isn’t it? I know we differ on certain aspects of British public schools. But it’s like their EFFECT is snobbish/elitist but the EXPERIENCE of them is not.
It kind of explains the narcissistic shock that the Etonian acting brigade display when they’re challenged on their privilege! “But I’m not like that!”
I am genuinely doing face palms over these experiences. I suppose it’s a good thing for my spirit that I am always a bit surprised to hear these stories of ignorance. I must be more optimistic about humanity than I thought!
I really hate the ‘You speak so well’ compliment. I grew up in Canada where the racism is more subtle and polite and I had that line thrown at me all the time. To say nothing of the fact that I was on the debate team and did public speaking competitions- people were always surprised about ‘well-spoken I was’. Sigh. I still get that as an adult sometimes.
I remember once my mom came home from work and was very annoyed. She had been making conversation with a patient in labour. The patient has asked her if she has any children, to which my mother replied, “Yes, I have 4 kids.”. Her patient asked her, “all with the same father”.
I did an interview with a white female judge once for a high school social studies project and afterwards she complimented me saying she was impressed that I was so articulate and composed.
if I wanted to interpret that charitably, I would hope she meant she was surprised because it’s not common for teenagers/high schoolers to be articulate and composed.
But you know the situation better than I ever can, and instinct is probably correct on this one.
Didn’t she and GOOP have some overlap at Spence. Meanwhile Kerry was accepted and graduated from Columbia and GOOP could not get in anywhere and had to use her father’s connection for something to happen. HA.
Not going to look it up but I thought goop dropped out in year 4, not that she couldn’t get into grad school. Not that this means she COULD get in though
According to KW’s bios online, she attended George Washington University, but was accepted to Yale and Dartmouth. As a Columbia alumna, I can say that we would have been happy to have her!
Oh, still a good school.
It’s been published that GOOP got into USC based on a phone call from Michael Douglas to the school. Her academic record from Spence was bad according friends I know that went to Spence. Once she got into USC, it’s been published that she did not finish her first year and quit to pursue acting.
I’m not a GOOP apologist at all, bc you can not be formally educated and still make something of your life. However, she still stands as a shining example of how mediocrity + nepotism can pave the way and a lot of opportunities for you in a field where getting your foot in the door is the whole game. Do you think Kerry could have gotten where she is using Gwyneth’s approach? Definitely not. I don’t doubt her experience as a minority at Spence, but I also mark the complicated path of racism, privilege and nepotism in providing opportunity for some and not others: Puff Daddy’s kids, Will Smith’s kids, Jay Z & Beyoncé’s kid– they will all experience a world closer to GOOP than Kerry and it will not be because of race, but of nepotistic privilege. Class privilege is a real thing, people go far bc of their connections than their actual talent or intelligence.
several things…..
her hair in the second photo is ATROCIOUS…..i never understand black women who like that out the pool wet dog wet greasy loo (not being racist here) (beyonce STOP) it just ends up looking like wet noodle and a rainy wiglet.
from the age of like 13 to now i get its so amazing what you stand for and you being here…… i use to take it as yea wow thanks…. now im like hmmmmmmm isnt it amazing youre here too (white women)
microagression happy even more so with a naturalista (natural hair wearing black woman) as in…. that must suck when you get a hair cut and it takes a year and a half to grow back (ugh wrong) or i like your hair better straight) or wow you look like you going on a hot date (wear subtle makeup and blazer/workwear and presentable just like my white woman counter part)…. its just weird and rude
secondly i thinnk for years her beyonce and many other empowered black and poc women felt empowered by just that …. tokenism…being the only faces in entertainment….but i feel now with a poc child and society things its a rude awakening and must be spoken out against….and for that im glad she rose up and talked about it…..
we have a long way to go for full inclusion and full intersection within feminism
It’s just like Obama’s Harvard transcript. “He got Cs! He didn’t deserve to go there, he just got there because of Affirmative Action.” Dudes, it’s HARVARD. It’s a lot harder than your state school that you paid $45 per semester in the 1970s (yes, I’m venting here instead of yelling this to my elderly aunts and uncles).
Anytime a successful POC gets anywhere in life, it’s because of affirmative action, not because of their hard work and merit. They’re “lucky to be there”…
+1000!!!
Omg, I’ve had this dumb affirmative action cloud hanging over my achievements and awards since SECOND GRADE. Which is especially stupid because from 2nd-8th grade I went to a private catholic school! The only Affirmative Action there is money lol. But it was very discouraging as a young kid to turn in essays and projects that I worked extremely hard on, and get hit with the “Oh you must’ve plagiarized, because someone like you couldn’t have wrote this” and so on. The final straw when I was one of three that got the Presidential Award in Gold in 6th grade. That was also the year Barack Obama got sworn in for the first time. My classmates spread a rumor around that the only reason I got the award was because Barack Obama was president at the time and we were both black. And that was the least offensive occurrence of my race being used as a weapon against me at that school.
In 11th grade, I got a special award and pin for being the student that represented what the International Baccalaureate program was about out of 500 students. I was extremely happy and pleasantly surprised, because awards like that would usually go to the WASPy kids who dominated and got everything. Unfortunately, they also thought they should’ve gotten this award too, because not even two hours after the event one of them posted a picture on Instagram saying, “Who else agrees with me that so and so should’ve gotten the IB award?” and when asked why she didn’t win, someone else responded “Because #EthnicsAlwaysWin.”
That event has since inspired me to work harder, but at times it gets annoying. I don’t want to continue living in a world where I must work 2x harder to get 1/2 the recognition. Things have to start getting better.
Lynnie,
I am so sorry you had to experience that in school. As a teacher, I am always on the look-out for such behavior and do my best to quash it.
Sadly, I think that when Hillary wins, sexism will come even more to the fore much as racism has under Obama. Not that either have anything to do with the racism/sexism prevalent in our society, but one already has been blamed for “causing” racism and I’ve no doubt the other will endure the same criticism. So, although I, too, wish things would get better, I don’t see that happening in the near future.
Arghhh! Lucky to be there…how about intelligent and talented and deselves to be there?!
I went to Spence for middle school. I was the grade below Gwyneth. And it was the WORST environment I have EVER been in. Kids were so mean it was mind boggling and all the adults turned a blind eye. 1/2 the student body seemed to be hospitalized at one point or another for drug addiction or eating disorders. Coke was being done in the bathroom. And it was crazy elite. The academics were the hardest I’ve ever seen combined with big wealth and entitlement. Bar none it was the one of the worst experiences of my life. I lasted three years before I freaked out and left. Anyway I’m not surprised that she was picked on and singled out. At that school everybody excepting the Gwyneth’s was ripe for abuse.