Several weeks back, I read an article on Slate which really stuck with me. It bothered me so much! Slate wrote about how airlines (American and internationally) are ill-equipped to deal with sexual assaults and sexual harassment which occur on-board. You can read the Slate article here. The following story reminded me a lot of the Slate piece, because at some point, I would have hoped that someone (a flight attendant, the air marshal, someone) would have stepped in and helped out Sophia Bush. But it doesn’t seem like they did. Sophia Bush posted a statement on her Twitter over the weekend, detailing her uncomfortable and creepy encounter with a man on a plane. This is what she wrote:
Dear Random Dude on a Plane:
When you make a woman so visibly uncomfortable, that after you’ve ignored all visual cues to please leave her alone (one word answers, she pulls out a book, puts on a hat, she actually asks you to not speak to her with the tone and words you’re choosing to use) that she finally GETS UP and MOVES SEATS, leave her alone. Do not continue trying to make conversation.
Stop turning around and looking at her. Stop leaning out of your seat and towards her body when she has to grab something out of the overhead bin above her original seat, and sadly also above you, mid flight.
And in my case, stop believing that you are entitled to make me uncomfortable because you ‘watch my TV show’ so I owe you some magical debt. I make it, you watch it. After that, the ‘exchange’ is done. You do not get to harass me, or any woman, because you think you pay our bills. You don’t bro, I DO.”
Yeah, that’s harassment. When you make a woman feel that uncomfortable, that’s harassment and it should have been stopped by a flight attendant or someone else. Not that it’s the airline’s fault, nor is it Sophia’s responsibility to take action against someone harassing her. It’s the dude’s fault. He sounds like a total creep. Ugh. But the thing is, I bet there are a lot of men who think this way, that there’s something transactional in their encounters with a famous woman, that she “owes” him something. Disgusting.
— Sophia Bush (@SophiaBush) September 17, 2016
Photos courtesy of WENN.
“stop believing that you are entitled to make me uncomfortable because you ‘watch my TV show’ so I owe you some magical debt. I make it, you watch it. After that, the ‘exchange’ is done.”>>>>> YESSSSS! People are so crazy these days.
I would add that this applies to fans in general, not just creepy dudes. Especially in recent years, demanding selfies and hurling insults at the supposed object of your adoration if they decline.
A-freaking-men!
Why is kicking in the nuts so lll mannered nowadays
Reminds me of the young girl who was on American Airlines and the guy who sat next to her assaulted her during the flight. Then it turned out that her father paid extra so that she be supervised by an attendant since she was a minor. Just horrific.
I always hold my breath while waiting for my seatmate, I’ve been lucky enough to only have sweet old ladies next to me.
it’s not just famous women. men (not ALL men) seem to think that, if they’re “nice” to a woman, she owes him something. a convo, a date, a kiss, etc.
male entitlement, pure and simple.
and all too often, women aren’t assertive enough to say “shove off!” because we’re taught to be nice and not offend.
Agree agree agree! I have felt exactly this in so many situations in my life. Especially during college and when I worked in the mortgage industry which was extremely male dominated and at one point was the only woman in an office of 6 men.
Also many men, even those who seek to be allies, do not understand why women are hesitant to be more assertive in these types of scenarios. Some seem to figure that if you don’t tell them to “shove off” or some other rude remark, you are signaling that you either don’t mind or are seeking the attention.
to add, Jenny, there was incident that just happened in NYC.
at some street festival, a guy started “grinding” on some woman he didn’t know, she told him to stop and he shot her. SHOT HER. dead.
so, there is often a threat (or at least a possibility) of violence with the unwanted attention. and, most often, the offender is larger and stronger than the victim.
UGH Men at the worst sometimes ( i.e.: every time they cant read body language or lips moving)
Ever since I heard of her being refereed as “Floppia Bush” I’m unable to not Cackle at her mere mention
I’m glad she didn’t feel the need to be polite. I have been conditioned to be polite to everyone and I hate it. A man followed me through the grocery store the other day asking me questions and offering me a job. Even though warning bells were going off I still couldn’t bring myself to tell him to get lost.
I can’t wait to see how this post about Sophia Bush statement compares to Zandaya and Solange post.
Good for her, but sad to hear she had to deal with such CRAP ass treatment.
She is beautiful and feisty. It’s a great combination, one that makes men visibly uncomfortable, LOL.
Re: earlier comments about fans’ bad behavior, think back to Martin Scorcese’s underrated The King of Comedy. Jerry Lewis plays a late night talk show host who in one scene refuses to give an autograph to an elderly woman who screams, “You should only get cancer!” Based on an incident that happened to Lewis. And then there’s the movies’ main character Rupert Pupkin (Robert De Niro) who kidnaps Lewis. The movie is from 1982 but fits right into today’s culture. And then there’s Rebecca Schaeffer and Theresa Saldana and John Lennon.
This has happened to me so much. I don’t even try to be polite anymore. I just straight up say, “I don’t like you, don’t talk to me, back off turd!!!” Don’t even have patience to see if these weirdos will get the hint because they don’t.
The truth is these incidents just make life more interesting. Calm down child. We live on planet earth where we cannot control the actions of everyone around us.