I’m a big fan of the blog Eyes for Lies. It’s run by a woman who is as skilled at spotting lies as the crime expert portrayed in the Fox series “Lie To Me.” She doesn’t work in the field of law enforcement, but she has consulted on cases and has a natural talent and interest. Eyes was certified as a “Truth Wizard” in a scientific study co-designed by Dr. Paul Ekman, the man whose work “Lie to Me” is roughly based on. She was also profiled in a piece in the Chicago Sun Times earlier this year.
Eyes for Lies, who does not reveal her identity due to threats from criminals, has a very logical and compelling take on the latest crime cases. She can tell you based on small “microexpressions,” tone of voice, hesitations and word choices if a person is likely to be telling the truth. If you follow shows like 48 Hours and/or pay attention to high profile cases like Madeline McCann’s disappearance, you will love her site.
I took a chance and e-mailed Eyes for her take on a much more trivial story than she usually covers – the Jon & Kate Plus 8 premiere. I wanted to know if she thought that Jon was lying about cheating or if Kate was hiding something. She got back to me with an insightful response that supports a lot of what we’ve heard from Kate’s family about the state of her relationship. Eyes thought that Jon might be telling the truth that he didn’t cheat on Kate – but he was telling the truth as far as he was concerned, not an absolute truth. It all got a little iffy when he talked about the impact his actions would have on his kids in the future, though, which suggests he did get up to something that he regrets.
(She is analyzing the couple based on the clip of the premiere we posted yesterday, which is no longer available.)
Jon looks “disgusted,” but he may believe he didn’t “cheat”
When I watch Jon speak in the segment you linked to, its interesting when Jon says with a disgusted look on his face, “I never cheated on Kate, and you know, that’s the way it is.” When he says that, he does not give off any indications of deceit, however, I don’t feel this is an adequate response upon which to draw a conclusion by itself.
When Jon says this, first and foremost, it is (a) not a high stake lie (he doesn’t stand to gain or lose anything by saying this, which reduces the clues to deception); (b) no one has defined the word “cheating” so what you or I may consider to be cheating may not be cheating to Jon, hence he may truly believe he did not cheat (which is how it appears); and (c) he appears to be extraordinarily relaxed and it sounds like he is slurring his words in this clip, which makes me wonder if he is under the influence of something, which could be affecting his responses, expressions and emotions.
However, Jon does say a lot more in the next several minutes that do make me question him. He says:
I guess my fear would be that my kids wouldn’t believe me because there is so much media out there… One day my kids are going to Google me, and I’m going to have to explain myself… I’d like to apologize to my family for my actions…um..like I said, I was the wrong place at the wrong time, but I understand the ramifications and how it will greatly affect everything, um…I should have thought more about what I did and where I was going and stuff like that and everyone knows what I am talking about so I don’t have to explain it. A man who did not cheat would not think these things, let alone say them.
Kate is angry, Jon is playing the victim and will not take responsibility
Kate is obviously very angry in this episode for a variety of reasons, and she tells us at one point she feels like the world is on her shoulders, and I believe it is. Jon seems to be complaining that he doesn’t like where he has ended up, but he doesn’t seem to be offering the family any solutions on how to change course and how he as a father will take responsibility financially to pull his family out of this and find a more suitable solution for the family (without the media). When I see Jon, I see a person who wants to claim he is a victim, but doesn’t want to take any responsibility for how he got where he is, or where he is going.
[From Eyes for Lies received via e-mail]
I like Eyes’ take because she focuses on the sort of dead weight role that Jon serves in the relationship and how he’s kind of giving up. Everyone has been talking about Kate’s role in badgering Jon into his bad behavior, but clearly these are two people who have each contributed to lousy situation they’re in. It’s likely that Eyes doesn’t follow celebrity gossip like we do and has no idea about the supposed separation contract Kate had Jon sign six months ago that allowed both of them to see other people as long as he showed up for tapings of their show. That would explain why he may not feel like he’s technically cheating, but still has mixed feelings about the effect his actions may have – Kate already gave him a pass.
Jon and Kate’s tabloid marital strife has predictably led to huge ratings for their show. US Weekly reports that 9.8 million people watched the premiere on Monday night compared to 9.2 million who tuned in to the final episode of “Lost.” These two both love money and considering how they bring in the ratings you can bet that TLC and other networks will be more than happy to keep the cameras rolling.
I’ve catch parts of various shows-I’m a not a regular watcher-but it has always seemed to me that he doesn’t want to be there, and that he’s uncomfortable with the attention. Of course not that uncomfortable that he would forgo the ski trip, Hawaiian vacation and the big new house. I wish they would just end the show and focus on those “Christian values” they’re supposedly so big on.
How interesting!
I’ll definitely be checking out her site, too. Thanks for the heads up, CB.
Can you ask the truth expert to analyse Brangelina. Pleeeeeeeeeeese.
Ooh thanks for the link to her site!
The thing is–to Jon and to Kate–what Jon did was not cheating because Kate already declared the marriage over. But they don’t want anyone to know that so he’s in quite a pickle…
I had the opinion that she was way harpy, but he wasnt much better by being so detached and essentially careless. No wonder she woudl only get more angry with time, too and then he would withdraw more– a spiraling situation.
I love lie to me. one season and I’m an expert lol. I picked up the ‘disgust’ and the comments. I think he means just that. He’s going to have to explain himself.
I thought the body language was more telling when the two were together. She seems to miss him and he seems ..not sure of the words, ‘over-it’ is not quite right. Body language suggests to me she is the one looking for forgiveness. He seems to be more in control, have a better leg to stand on. Words are failing me. Must.Get.Coffee.
Thanks for the link CB I really loved ‘lie to me’ (yummier with Miki Pfeiffer)
I know one thing: dude is hitting the bottle. he has been drinking in every picture, slurring his words at these arm chair confessionals, etc. i dont need Eyes to tell me that much is true because its totally obvious. if i were in this situation id wake up and hit the bottle too 🙂 just to take the edge off a day of filming against your will, listening to kate boss you around for a few hours and having to feign remorse for something you were told you could do.
for anyone who watched the show, i think it would be interesting to have jon’s interaction with alexis analyzed. at the party they are talking and hugging and jon seems to cling onto the girl for dear life. not sure what emotion it was that made him do that but he looks to be incredibly sad. it would be interesting to know what a professional thinks.
Very interesting!
That is a gorgeous German Shepard in the background with Jon!!!!!!
I don’t think they’ve loved each other for a very long time. You don’t have to be an expert to pick up on that.
Let me just throw out this reminder of something: in the first season Kate very famously said if Jon or anyone in the family wanted out of the show, then the show was over. That they all had to be in it or they were all out of it. She promised that.
For the last two seasons or more, you can tell he doesn’t want the show anymore. And at the end of this last season, he said so, on the show. She disregarded his statements and made it clear that the show would continue anyway.
I wonder if she even meant it when she said if either one of them wants out, it’s over. I tend to think if she wanted out and he didn’t, he would of course go with her wishes. Basically it’s whatever she wants and it’s probably been that way from the beginning.
What I wish this couple would do is pull the plug on the show (they would have to scale down the lavish lifestyle, but they do have millions already), and either get into marriage counseling pronto or figure out how to divorce amicably and with the best interests of the kids at the forefront. She always says she’s all about her kids, she “breathes because of” her kids, but this show is not really about them, it’s about making money for her. And always has been.
TLC should also pull the plug, but I doubt they will. I know a lot of people boycott the whole network because now it’s nothing but freakishly large families.
Thank you for being the rare commentator to point out how slacker dad is a deadweight in this family. I can’t think of anything sadder than finally getting the house/property of your dreams after years of scheming and alienating family and then realizing that the whole country hates you and looking around your big house and realizing you have no marriage to bring it to life. Hope she has good relationships with all those kids and all those helpers, because they’re all she’s got now.
I had never watched the show – but I watched the season premier and I found it striking when Jon and one of the little girls was talking about the girl’s “buddy”. “Remember when you said buddy, daddy? He’s my buddy” Jon would say “you don’t hug your buddy, right?” and she’d say “no daddy, I don’t hug friends, I only hug parents.” He’d say “no kisses, right” and she’d say “Daddy, remember? we don’t kiss friends! only parents”
Makes me wonder how much Jon has had a “friend” at the house while the kids are there.
I hate these two famewh0res.
Nice link tho – thanks!
It all doesn’t matter anyway that gravy train is gonna keep rollin’ until the ratings drop.
I have done an extenstive anaylsis on her ‘hairstyle’ and conclude: Shave it all off and start again.
Jon needs to grow a set of balls. Period. I can’t stand his “do nothing and then whine about the results” behavior. Early in my marriage our dynamic was like this…. I got so sick of it I utterly backed off of every decision, forcing my husband to make all decisions from where we were eating to what we were doing… everything. The nice result was that my husband “grew a set” and the buck stopped with him, so he stopped shrugging his shoulders like an idiot and started thinking about what would be best for him and the family. Saved my marriage because I was ready to leave his spineless ass.
Renee, you rock!