Chance the Rapper has grown on me a lot in the past year or so. Full disclosure: some of the younger guys all kind of blend together for me (I’m at that age) so it takes something beyond music for me to actually remember one of the young guys. I remember Chance because he got political last year and endorsed Hillary Clinton. He actively campaigned for her and after her loss, he gave one of the most cogent takedowns of Trump supporters I’ve read thus far. He’s also committed to doing more work and continuing the fight, and his fight has started in his home city, Chicago, where he recently donated $1 million to Chicago public schools.
All of which is to say, I really like Chance. He covers the latest issue of Complex and he talks mostly about his life as a financially successful 23-year-old who happens to be a father of a 1-year-old baby girl. He wants to move back in with his parents, not because he has to but because he sort of wants to. Some highlights:
His father: “I have the world’s best dad currently. Most of the stuff that he showed me has been his dedication, his time management, his commitment to being truthful. It’s all about what he’s instilled in me. So, I wanna have the type of relationship where I’m a trusted figure beyond a dad. I wanna be a good friend and a good example.
He wants to move back in with his parents: “I’m in a unique position [with] a lot of the things you would think you would get past because of the “successes” that I’ve had. Like, I’m honestly, in real life, thinking about moving in with my parents right now. I think, anybody, if they were in my position—if they were 23 with a kid for the first time and were working—they would find comfort in being able to stay with their parents. If their parents are willing. I guess that’s just what it all comes down to; if they’re willing. I’m in a position where I want to be closer to my parents now, because I realize how important that is. There was never a point, ever, in my life where I can remember loving someone as much or more than I love my mom until I met my daughter. So, it made me understand that my mom loves me more than she loves anybody in the world, and that’s crazy to me. So of course I wanna be around her.
When his girlfriend told him she was pregnant: “Holy sh-t. I think most people go into denial, if you’re a dude. You know what I’m saying? I’m not shy in saying it: I didn’t expect to become a father when I was 22. It had a huge impact on what I was doing. I was touring a lot, trying to figure out where I was going in the world… I’m still figuring everything out, but it was just another thing on my plate. I was scared and I was in denial, but every day it became a little easier. I’m talking pre-having a baby — because after having a baby it just gets harder. I went from a place of just rejecting it, to not just being optimistic but beckoning it, like, “I’m ready to have this baby. Let’s f–king go!”
Working on an album with a baby: “It was kind of impossible. I didn’t have any space or anything like that. I talk about it a lot, how we camped out at the studio with, like, 17 air mattresses in this huge building. My daughter and the mother of my child were also staying at the studio with me in a room on a terribly uncomfortable inflatable mattress. Trying to build a home inside of a studio—it’s impossible.
I think it’s surprisingly sweet how he explains why he wants to move in with his parents now that he’s a father. My suggestion would be that he should buy a big house for himself, ask his parents to move in with him for as long as they want – and they can take care of the place while he’s touring – and then have his girlfriend and baby there too. But if the choice is between “stay on an air mattress in the studio” and “move back in with your parents,” I guess I would choose his parents’ house too.
Photos courtesy of WENN, cover courtesy of Complex.
From my personal experience: It SOUNDS like a good idea to move in with your parents when you have a good relationship with them, but there’s a lot of dynamics that shift once you’re on your own that fly under the radar. Both of you get used to a kind of independent living that you can’t really have once you’re all back together again because your adult personality clashes with the old habits you have as a child of your parents.
I always find it interesting that men consider “denial” a big part of their surprise pregnancy experience. I suspect a lot of women with unexpected pregnancies wish they had that luxury of biology.
I love that he wants to move back in with his parents. He is really self aware for such a young man. I did not fully appreciate my parents, especially my mom, until i was much older.
As a superficial aside, he is very handsome.
I agree that he’s really self-aware and mature for his age. I’ve always thought he was a smart guy, now I realize he’s genuinely sweet, too. I also agree that he’s super handsome!
He also has the resources to change the arrangement if it doesn’t work out the way he envisions.
Love Chance. So talented, and one of the really good guys.
My husband and I have a LOT of parents between the two of us and we’ve co-habitated with all of them in some way shape or form for varying amounts of time since our son was born. It’s been wonderful and I think more people should consider the option of a “communal” living arrangement with family where possible. Our son has a great relationship with all of his grandparents and we’re both closer to our in laws than many people are. Also, not that it’s a concern for Chance, but it helps everyone financially to have more people contribute to the household expenses.
Nah, my parents have done their time raising me, they deserve a break.
There’s nothing wrong with him moving back in with them. He’s only 23, they have great relationships with each other, and he’s probably not just sitting around all the time
His music is slowly growing on me but I much admire his financial commitment to and outspokenness on social justice and political causes.
Not too many parents want to live with their grown children in their grown children’s home. Parents like their autonomy and freedom too. If they ever have a falling out, they would be homeless lol. I say parents should keep their own homes as long as possible.
I love Chance the Rapper without reservation. His father worked for Obama during his first term, and he and Chance went to the white house together. Both were so proud of each other and excited to be there . (Sniff. I miss those days so much.)
Aw, he’s definitely a good egg. He’s also just a few months older than I am! I didn’t know that.
I love Chance SO much. I think he had me from approx line 5-6 of “All we got” when he said, “Man my daughter couldn’t have a better mother/ If she ever find another, he better love her.” The words jumped out at me – like, are we actually at a place culturally where we can accept that love is sometimes transient, and that if people move on, it’s better to support them? And is the guy talking about these things is seriously only 23?
And then he’s donating a million dollars to public schools, and buying out screenings of “get out,” and trying to maintain artistic integrity as well as he can by refusing to sign with a label. If he ever does something asshole-ish I will be sincerely devastated, and I really hope that day doesn’t come. If the future of rap looks like Chance we are pretty fortunate.
Another suggestion (as I have had my daughters move back home at one time or another) if I may. My mom bought a house two doors down from me so that when she needed looking after she would be near me (all my brothers lived out of town). After I had to put her in a nursing home and put her house up for sale, my youngest bought it (even though her SO wanted a newer house) so that I could stay in my home as long as possible. It’s the best of both worlds – I get to see them yet at the end of the day, can go home to my own house and have my quiet time. All three of my girls live in close proximity and it’s great. But don’t think I could handle any of them moving back in as I relish my quiet time. So buy two houses, side by side (and they don’t have to be big houses) and you get privacy and being close at the same time.
That’s what my sister and parents did. They kinda made the decision on their own without consulting me but whatever. It seems to be working pretty well so far.
That’s what my extended family are doing. They all live within 3 streets of each other and my Nanna who is nearly 90. Everyone checks in on each other (especially my nan) but everyone also has their own space.
Love him. I’ve found myself listening to Juke Jam on repeat (even though Bieber is on it, it’s such a good song).
This is very African thing to say. : ) I guess you can help the genes. : ) It takes a village. : )