Amy Schumer covers the latest issue of British Glamour. I’m surprised by how nice the cover is because… I’ve never really thought that Amy is very photogenic. It’s like the Lena Dunham thing sometimes, where certain women try to look bad just so they can act all indignant when people are like “yikes!” But Amy looks nice here. Anyway, Amy chats with Glamour about her boyfriend Ben Hanisch, who still seems to give off a shady vibe, but I guess we’re just supposed to accept that now. She shares a very intimate story about their sex life and… well, I guess we’re supposed to be shocked or wryly say, “oh, such ribald humor, Miss Schumer!” But mostly I just want her to stop. Some highlights:
Amy on whether being famous is how she imagined it to be: “No, I did not ever want to be famous, honestly. It didn’t occur to me until it was already happening. The fame aspect is not something that appealed to me at all. And I was really kind of terrified of it. I wouldn’t trade it to wait tables or whatever. I live my life, I’m grateful for everything. It’s mostly just really annoying. And distracting. And embarrassing for everyone. And I’m conscious for the people I’m with. Now when I go outside, I get photographed by the paparazzi. I’m not to the level of some people – some actresses where it’s constant tabloids – but it’s enough that it’s really uncomfortable.”
On her boyfriend, Ben Hanisch: “He’s very protective of me, like, not overprotective, but if someone’s taking pictures of me or filming in a restaurant, he’ll start taking pictures of them. He’s really cool; it’s not a problem to be around any of the sorts of people who are at these events. He takes it all in his stride. But when I say, “Shall we get out of here?” he’s like, “Yes!” I’m so lucky that I met him. And he hadn’t seen any of my work before we met…”
On whether there is any danger of her happiness jeopardising her comedy material: “Um, well, I’m never that happy…I can be happy, and funny stuff also happens; I don’t think I’m like that. I went down on Ben this morning and he yawned – it was an accident, but we were both just dying laughing. I’m happy, but obviously I was like, “F–k you.”….When I’m down there, if it’s more than a minute, it’s his birthday or something. But this morning it just happened – and then he yawned and it was a great excuse to stop.”
On whether there’s anyone that she would want to snog that she could cast in her next film: “Oh, gosh, I mean there’s so many…Yeah, for sure, I wouldn’t kick [Tom Hardy] out of bed. Christian Bale, Idris Elba…I mean, this is just a list of who I wanna sleep with, right?”
Did we need to know that Ben yawned while she was downtown? No. If she was dating Michael Fassbender, maybe I would want to know those details. But otherwise… no. As for Amy saying that she was never trying to be famous… I’m not sure if I believe her. Sometimes I think she’s a big famewhore, and then sometimes I’m surprised by how she can go quiet for a while. Mostly, I think that she wanted to be famous but she’s insecure and she hates it that people feel free to criticize her because she’s a celebrity.
Meanwhile, did you hear that she dropped out of the Barbie movie? She was supposed to play Barbie and now she won’t. Because of “scheduling.” *taps nose* I wonder if something else is going on.
Cover courtesy of Glamour UK.
Guess who cares? No one. She’s so pathetic when she tells these stupid attention seeking stories *rolls eyes*
I agree, no one cares. I’m rolling my eyes and yawning at the same time.
I know. With each day, she becomes more and more pathetic. I really didn’t think that was possible, but she’s living proof!
I rolled my eyes so hard I saw my brain. Seriously. We know you have a boyfriend Amy. You are so awesome because you jave sex with your boyfriend. My god. She is exhausing. This oversharing is rediculous. She needs to go away already.
we get it….you are getting laid…..good for you 🙂
I’ve yawned during many things and at lots of places.Sex can be exhausting. My ex always fell asleep for a couple minutes within seconds after we finished. So what? Yawning is a natural thing
I don’t know why I even clicked on this because I can’t stand her, not sure what I was expecting. Still can’t stand her. Moving on, lol.
And I don’t think she looks great on this cover. Her face looks sort of menacing.
That’s basically me lol.
Me too. Ugh, this woman irritates me to no end. Also, who says “Shall we get out of here?” How very proper of her.
In 38 years, I don’t think I’ve ever said the word “shall.”
Sometimes I don’t understand blush – like in the last picture.
That’s just a horrible makeup job in total. Blush is only supposed to go halfway down your cheekbones to your apples. her is venturing in to contour territory.
I think she needs that makeup contour to make it look as though she has bone structure. If you kind of unfocus your eyes on the magazine cover the excess blush kind looks like cheekbones – sort of. Without the extra blush you would see she just has very fat cheeks, which are only cute on a child, not a grown woman.
I really tried to like her but I just can’t. She’s so annoying.
++++++1
She’s disgusting. I can’t wait for her to go away.
I don’t think she’s that funny, I just don’t.
And the whole thing about I’m a size 6. She protests too much and comes across insecure
No one needs to know this. It’s not funny.
She reeks of desperation!
What’s with this generation and TMI!
It has nothing to do with a generation. Some just aren’t uncomfortable. I’m in my 30’s and have lots of very good friends(male and female ) in their 60’s – 80’s and they’re always joking and talking about their “TMI” things.
What i like about Amy is that she is consistent in her actions and words.
I respect people who are like that, they look dignified to me even if their deeds are sometimes crass.
I also like that she is very honest about how she feels about her body – she knows she is chub, but still likes herself. And is sometimes insecure too and sometimes just really openly annoyed when she gets called plus-size. It all feels very real to me.
Yeah, consistently pathetic and desperate.
I like some (very little) of her jokes,but can’t like her as a person and I’ve never met her. 😧
I’ve thought she was really funny on Ellen…but unfunny everywhere else. It’s weird. Maybe her “clean” humour works better than her “dirty” humour.
She’s exhausting.
She reminds me of Rosie O’Donnell in that even when she smiles, it looks like a grimace.
I sneezed once during sex but you don’t see me talking about it with Glamour
She also made this joke during her Netflix special. It worked better there.
I always defend Amy b/c I think she is really funny. I loved Trainwreck! However, *long pause* her new Netflix special was AWFUL! I kept waiting for it to get better and it just kept getting worse. I didn’t laugh once. So disappointing for someone that is a fan.
Yeah, she totally didn’t “drop out” of the Barbie movie; Sony gave her the boot. The “scheduling conflict” nonsense is just Sony being nice enough to let her save face.
Why doesn’t he ever smile with teeth. It bugs me to no end. He reminds me of someone who used to have jenky teeth and got them fixed but always forgets.