As I’ve said before, I’m not a baby person. I’m okay with kids (for a short time), but I’m not one of those “oh, look, a baby!!” people. I have zero interest in changing diapers and all of that. I know that about myself, which is why I don’t hang out with babies. Pharrell Williams hangs out with babies though – Pharrell and his wife Helen Lasichanh have four kids – 5-year-old Rocket (that name) and five-month-old triplets, names unknown. We do know that the triplets are two boys and a girl though. And now we know that Pharrell doesn’t change their diapers.
In an interview with the Today Show on Tuesday, Pharrell was asked a lot about the triplets and what it’s like at home. He jokes about how they cry in harmony and then he gets asked if he changes diapers. He says, flat-out, “No.” And then when pressed, he says: “My wife is SEAL Team Six. There’s nothing she can’t do. I mean, she carried those three bodies and she’s just on it all the time. We do have some amazing people to help us, but it’s serious.”
One nice thing I’ll say is that I appreciate his honesty and I appreciate that he says that they have help, because of course they have help!! THREE BABIES. It would be crazy if he and Helen didn’t have extra help, like five full-time nannies. But I still take issue with Pharrell never changing the diapers. Yeah, Helen is a hero for carrying those babies. But surely he could help her out by, like, doing some diaper changes?
Photos courtesy of WENN.
That would not be flying. My father in law apparently has never changed a diaper in his life. I had a pretty hands on dad. When we take our niece for an evening/overnight my husband does just as much, if not more than I do. He’s absolutely in love with this kid – and while he doesn’t enjoy even a second of changing diapers (who does) he does it without complaining because it’s part of the package with a baby.
Is it weird that I do like it?! It’s such a cute couple of minutes…just you and the baby, it staring at you waiting to get all cleaned up. I usually tickle them and talk to them…
Good gawd I sound exactly like my mom, lol. But I get what you’re saying here…
Aww. That’s a sweet comment and I get what you’re saying.
Aww, that is honestly so sweet. I think maybe, if it was my own baby, I’d appreciate things a little differently… but I didn’t grow up with little kids around at all. My cousins on moms side are all a lot older and have kids about my age. Cousins on my dads side are max 4 years younger than I am. I’m also SUPER scent sensitive – so there’s been some major gagging happening during diaper changes haha. At one point I was afraid I was going to throw up on the baby, honestly. Husband is a plumber though – so this does not bother him nearly as much as it would bother some. If I was doing it more regularly, I’m sure I’d get used to it though.
I get that. I used to love changing my sons diaper because we had tons of silly songs we would sing and he would dance. It was fun. I hated the smell but who can resist baby tummy.
When my kids were babies and my parents helped out, my dad would “assist” my mom-like hand her wipes, and put the diaper in the Diaper Genie. But there is no way my dad could have done it on his own. We know someone who is off the charts wealthy (plane, yacht) and he really didn’t want kids. He agreed to 2 for his wife’s sake, but he never changed a diaper or really helped with the kids when they were babies. Needless to say, they got divorced when the kids were teens.
I think that’s even pretty good, really. Assisting can make it go a whole lot smoother than doing it by yourself. Especially with squirmy kids… I think I’m just partially biased because hub is so desensitized to dealing with things that aren’t pleasant because of work xD
Well really having kids with someone you know doesn’t want them isn’t a great sign that they’re going to be much of a parent is it?
Makes me like him a bit less. His wife is a champion. I have only one todller my husband still had to change diappers, it’s his child’s shit to clean up, it’s mandatory. Are his hands to precious to get some dirt on them? I am happy they have and can afford as much help as possible but I am sure there are moments when it is between her and him and his answer means that in those moments she is the one to do it.
OMG triplets, and he is still carrying on the time honored male tradition of not changing diapers. For shame!
Lets be honest here. His wife probably isnt doing too much of that either. The toilet stuff would probably be the primary preserve of staff. It would be different if you were talking about an average Jan and Joe whose only extra help is from a visiting MIL.
I don’t know how you can have a baby and NEVER change it’s diaper. That basically means you’re never alone with your baby. I feel like it’s avoiding a certain level of, I don’t know if ‘intimacy’ is the right word but to NEVER change your baby, even if you have help, it seems so cold and detached. And I mean, come on a pee diaper takes two seconds to change and is usually pleasant (baby usually happy). Like come on. This makes me think less of him for sure.
Exactly this.
This. If he’s never changed a diaper he’s never been alone for more than a couple hours with ANY of those three babies. That’s just weird.
I dont know, its not like if he doesnt pull his weight in the diaper department a baby wont still be changed immediately by one of their many trained nannies. As long as he is still engaged in some daily routines like bathing, feeding or bed time then the bonding is still happening. I’m not bothered by this.
I think you are being very generous. I am dubious about a man not changing diapers but still being an involved parent. I think he is one of those dads that wants to have a vague, philosophical hand in parenting without any of the dirty work.
I am always dubious of men who don’t change diapers (and I’ve met some who won’t feed their kids while they’re on the bottle, either). A friend had a baby and her husband wouldn’t touch diapers, even if the kid was having a meltdown and changing was a two-person job just to get it done. I told her to leave him, and I remember clearly saying, “He’s not on your team.” She didn’t, because it seems ludicrous to leave a man for not changing diapers, but a couple years later he was caught in an affair and she did end up leaving him. Anyway, the point is, Pharrell is probably fine because not every man who won’t change diapers is a dickhead, but I side-eye men who don’t change diapers. The world has changed, the role of fathers is more hands-on than it was in our parents’ day, and it’s some macho BS to not change diapers.
@Algernon-yes, my husband is a self admitted “not a baby person” but despite that he was always a huge help-diapers, baths, feeding, snuggling. He likes kids when they’re older and can interact-but you never would have known that if you had seen him with our babies. I remember in my first kid mommy group there was a woman who’s husband refused to do any of that. My husband had just as busy and high pressured of a job as her husband-that was the excuse “Oh he travels, works late hours”. I always wonder if they stayed together.
I used to change nappies too. Until I got a poo facial. It tasted like..banana..lol
Honestly, since I’m sure they have an army of help ( and I don’t blame them, with triplets) I’m not to horribly offended. It’s kind of dickish of him, but I suspect most people would foist off the grunt work involved with parenting if they could afford help if they were honest with themselves. I know I would be tempted to.
I think it depends on whether his wife is still stuck changing diapers. If they’re both handing it off to the nanny – then whatever. But if she’s there struggling to do it and he’s like “uh-unh, I’m not helping” then I think it’s full on dickish. It’s also extra strange that with THAT many kids, he’s not even changing the odd diaper.
He’s honest about his lack of diapering and he has staff. I’m giving him a pass.
Same.
at first I was like, ugh this makes me not like him.
but then I saw your comment and realized, so many famous people lie about doing it. And he didnt. So yes, I agree. He could have BS’d but instead, he didnt.
+1
Agreed. If they didn’t have paid people to do it, and he was just leaving his wife to it? I’d hate the man. As it is, he’s not doling out the twee Hollywood bullshit that oh, he’s this hands-on parent who wakes in the nights and shares in all the changes and precious moments… he’s not unique, all that’s unique is the honesty.
That makes me dislike him immensely. They’re your kids, too, guy.
Yeah. Also
” But surely he could help her out by, like, doing some diaper changes?”
It’s not “helping” when it’s your own child. He’s not doing her some sort of a favor, that’s called being a father.
THIS. My cousin’s husband is a deadbeat. Has barely “helped” with their (now nearly) 2-year-old since she was born. Never got up once in the night, never dropped her off at daycare – even when he wasn’t working. NEVER “helps”… on the rare occassion my cousin was “allowed to nap” because he would “watch the kid” for an hour or two she was so grateful. Well.. one, that’s an abusive relationship… and two, you’re not “watching” your own kid. It’s called parenting, together. Ugh.
Oh, and Pharrell – change a diaper please.
He’s pathetic. You know who else has famously never changed the diapers on any of his kids? Cheetolini. Being a father — it’s more than just donating the sperm, you asswipes.
Eh, you’re average guy from an average home? I’d be furious. But hopefully with help (and my gosh THREE newborns AND a preschooler?! No shame from me!) she doesn’t have to change many either. Or any. If I had a nanny I would’ve left all the nuggets for them to deal with.
Three babies at the same time and he can’t change one diaper? Uh..
I’d rather watch that Flatliners sequel, The Accountant 2 and Pitch Perfect 3 than another movie about minions.
As for nappy changing, I used to take care of my nephews and nieces when they were infants. I have no issue with the boys but it makes me extra nervous when it comes to the girls. I have to call someone to help me with the cleaning. Guys, you get what I mean. Louis C.K. tackled that dilemma in one of his stand-up.
I could count on one hand the times my husband changed diapers… and he’s cleaned the toilet once and gagged… and I had no idea why because I keep tidy toilets that get a good scrubbing once per week.
Hah! My grandfather used to tell the story of how, as a newlywed, he’d “drop” all the food while cooking until he was banished permanently from the kitchen. Winking and grinning.
If I was your grandmother, I would have made grandpa a plate with all the food he dropped until he pulled his shit together or found another task to claim for his very own.
Yeah, my elderly neighbor played that helpless man game. He married his secretary, of course. When she died, he tried to play the game with every female who entered the house (not with males). I took care of his cats to keep them from starving (and the kitten from becoming feral due to lack of human interaction…). I inherited them when he died! OK, I pushed the kitten on him because the older cat really needed company.
The older cat, who really wasn’t a lap cat by nature, pinned me down every time I sat on his couch and would growl when I tried to get up. Even non-lap cats need occasional contact. I would plop her in her pet human’s lap for petting as I left, and he would dutifully do it until the door closed – I could see through the window. Ridiculous. He did save her from a ditch when she was a tiny tot, though. She was immediately thrilled to come live with me after he died, despite the presence of three resident cats. Her foster kitten (3 years old and twice her size, she was a runt) had freaked when he came over first, but followed her around happily as she investigated the new digs and practiced terrorizing the original crew. She loved conflict, and would race to protect her big baby when the youngest original resident tried to terrorize him (they used to fight through the screen window when I was visiting before), and then I would have to run to protect the terrorizer.
The helpless guy’s younger brother was very self-sufficient and said his older brother was spoiled as a child by a nanny when his missionary parents lived overseas. Cautionary tale. His daughter said he was like that throughout her childhood, so her mom did everything for him. She vowed to never marry a man not able to completely take care of himself. She was still testing her guy even after living together for ten years….
But really, Pharrell, any dad needs to do enough of the basic baby chores to be able to take care of them in an emergency. You might not always have your wife or nannies around. Also babies bond with the people who take care of them, and you want at least one of those people to be you.
What a jerk. Seriously, if you are a parent then you change diapers. I really hate when women go along with men pulling that garbage.
Big diss for not changing diapers Dude.
My ex husband not only changed diapers, he insisted on handling those special awful ones. He’d say “Just hand me the paper towels and stand back. I got this.”
Makes me think less of him as a father and a husband…sorry but it does. *Shrug*. Nannies are fine and great but given the MANY changing “opportunities” there would be, “never” tells me the nannies are always there and not just “helping hands” and his wife picks up the rest of the work. It doesn’t put me off his work of course but personally, I think less of him.
I’m ok with it because they have staff. If Mom was changing all the diapers, no way.
My dad and my father-in-law each changed one diaper apiece in their lives. In my dad’s case it was my little brother, and he only changed it because it had gotten to the point where it was worse NOT to change it. In my FIL’s case, it was my daughter, and my MIL made him do it because he’d made it through four kids and five grandkids at that point and apparently that was the limit.
My husband changed at least as many diapers as I did. If I changed more, it was only because I was home more. If we were both home with the kids, he was almost always the one who changed the diapers, especially when the babies were little. Since I was nursing, he said it was fair that our job titles were Milky Mama and Diaper Daddy. Worked for me!
Milky Mama and Diaper Daddy. Love it. I was never blessed with children but I have changed my share of diapers. Some are messier than others.
My daughter is 3 years older than my son. One day when I want to say he was still less than a year old, she was pretending to be the mama–so sweet, and she changed his diaper. I had stepped out of the room, so I didn’t know. It was a terrible, awful smelly messy diaper, and she threw up. When I came back in, they were both covered in vomit and feces. Unforgettable! Poor babies!
They’re loaded and admit to staff. If I had the cash I would pay someone to change my kids diapers too.
Right? I would never change a diaper if I had the help they have honestly. I don’t think that makes him a jerk or a bad dad like some are suggesting.
I would still change diapers even if I was super rich because to me some of the most beautiful moments with my kids has been when I was doing the mundane or hard jobs of being a mother and I won’t trade them for anything.
I notice that the triplets’ mommy is still changing them, apparently, even with staff
Yeah it’s so weird to not even change the odd diaper. I mean those babies probably need like 8 changes a day and times by 3….that’s a LOT of diaper changing happening each week and you’ve never done it ONCE?! So detached and cold.
Jerk.
There are some things my hubby does better than me and excels with it and there’s the things that he just mucks up and I have to do it all over again. I’d rather just to it right the first time than have him do it.
Are you sure he’s not mucking things up on purpose? That’s a great way to get out of stuff!!
I have 0 problems with this, as long as he’s pulling his weight in other ways. Equality doesn’t always mean splitting the same task 50/50. There were things I didn’t/don’t do for my kids and things my husband didn’t do. But it’s not a bid deal because there’s MORE than enough work to go around even with just one baby.
This is a good point. If he’s disengaged in every way because the mom and nanny do it all, that’s not good. With THREE babies, I have to think he’s doing something, or at least I hope so.
I do hope if he had to, he could change a diaper, because sooner or later he’s going to be the only adult in the room and one of those kids is going to go.
Idk changing babies nappy’s is a basic need for babies, parnets are suppose to meet those needs and of course still have help. But I don’t know that’s a basic need that there dad never meet!
If I didn’t think this came from a place of “I’m a guy, I don’t change diapers,” maybe I would let it slide. But if his wife is changing diapers and he’s not, sorry, no pass. Man up, Pharrell. You never hear women say this crap.
So true, good you imagine if a woman said that! She would be called a neglectful mum.
Yeah that’s what I was thinking. What would these comments be like if she was giving the interview and this was her reply?
I don’t think he should get a pass just because he’s a guy. He’s their father – he should be involved and hands on.
He’s being honest. I don’t agree, but at least he’s not being fake like most celebrities. We can all act outraged and clutch pearls but let’s be real there are many non-zillionaire dads out there that don’t change diapers.
My honest guess is that he works ridiculously long hours and probably isn’t even home that much. Again, real world stuff here.
His wife probably doesn’t even change diapers either and I have no issue if that’s the case. When you are that rich, you can hire nannies to do that for you, while you rest, especially with triplets.
Why would he change diapers when they have nannies to do it? It isn’t like he is sticking his wife with all of the work.
not cool. I, for one, am not “happy” about this – I thought he was an evolved member of the species! bummer
I don’t remember who changed my diapers, for pete’s sake.
It’s more important for a father to be involved when a child can respond and interact, and as they grow up and deal with school, friends, etc.
They have plenty of help; he’s not making his wife suffer.
Both my sons changed diapers, bathed the babies, fed the babies. They never even considered not doing it. They were so excited by being a dad. I wonder if having a absent father heightened their desire to do better than what they got.
On one hand, he’s a busy guy with a constantly-changing schedule and is required to travel for long periods at a time, and that this job pays for his family to live etc. If they agreed to this arrangement before the kids arrived then meh, that’s their decision. As others have pointed out, it’s not the only thing involved in being an attentive parent to your child.
Having said that, it’s still so frustrating to see many men happy to be parents but feel as though they can pick and choose which parts to be the primary on, and excuse themselves from the messier bits without any discussion. It just reeks of the idea that baby duties (particularly of the diaper variety) still “default” to the woman.
My Dad changed all of our diapers though my mother says he exaggerates the number of times. He was working long hours but I was the oops last baby who came along and he did change my diapers a lot. He bathed me and sort of took me over since I was his last chance to be more hands on. Both of my parents worked so they did have help with us but it didn’t stop them from caring for us. My ex is/was as hands on as I am and he worked too so Pharrell has no real excuse. Even with help you can be there and do things for the babies if you choose.
On the other hand, they may have an arrangement where they have decided to split certain duties. His wife is no shrinking violet by a long shot so my guess is she is ok with it.
What if she had a cold or wasn’t feeling well? He wouldn’t help? That’s kind of crazy. I could not have survived without the help of my husband, and we only have one kid. My health is so compromised as much as I’d love to be 100% all the time, it’s just not feasible. That kind of sucks, I like him but this is one for the “con” list.
He makes millions and pays help to change diapers – most women would appreciate that!
What is the point of having children if you just outsource all the day-to-day tasks necessary to care for them? Changing a diaper sucks but I do think it helps to bond with a child.
I think so many of these celebrity children end up screwed up because they spend more time with a nanny than their own parents. Not that having a nanny is bad in general because I had one growing up, but she was only there while my parents were at work.
My dad is 70. I’m 28. My dad was 41 (I think) when I was born so he would fit the category of a more old school date and noone comes more macho than my father yet he always changed my nappies, fed me, helped put my hair in a ponytail. This makes me respect him so much more.
IMO, he doesn’t do a thing around his babies. It’s all on his wife.
Honesty, or not the babies are as much his as they are hers.
There are no questions whether somebody likes changing nappies or not. They need to be changed full stop.
The baby poops and then you need to change the nappy and it doesn’t matter who does it.
I’d be pretty mad if my husband said he didn’t want to do it.