It’s no secret that things have been very icy between Tori and Candy Spelling. Over the past few months, there’s been a ton of back and forth between the two women, so much that I don’t even want to do a proper recap. It was a lot of Candy calling Tori a horrible person, and Tori calling Candy a bad mother, et cetera. The last chapter in the saga happened about a week and half ago, when Candy went on a radio show and said, “My daughter one day decided that she wasn’t speaking to my husband, myself and my son and that’s how it’s continued for the last, oh gosh, four or five years. It was sad because that’s what killed my husband actually.”

Tori responded to that pretty well, considering her mom basically said Tori killed her father. Tori just sort of publicly detached, not really offering a comment about the whole situation. It looks like Tori was trying to privately mend some fences, though – she invited Candy to granddaughter Stella’s first birthday party. Candy proclaimed a few months ago that she had never even met her granddaughter – so this was a golden opportunity. Unfortunately for all, Candy once again confirmed to all of us that she’s the biggest megabitch to ever buy out Rodeo Drive. Candy at first RSVPed the party invitation, and her people even began making arrangements with Tori’s people. But in the end, Candy cancelled – just one hour before the birthday party of the granddaughter she’s never met:

Hoping to end their ongoing feud, Tori Spelling invited her estranged mother Candy to daughter Stella’s first birthday party this past Saturday in Encino, Calif., sources tell Usmagazine.com.

Candy’s camp RSVPed yes, but she never showed up (despite complaining in many interviews that she has never met her granddaughter).

Sources add that Candy’s camp even called in advance and asked if camera crews for Tori’s Oxygen show would be present. Tori assured them she would be respectful of her mother’s wishes if she didn’t want to be filmed.

“She still chose not to come,” says a source.

A Candy source tells Us, “Candy did RSVP to the event but decided not to attend when she found out there would be cameras there. She wanted it to be an entirely private meeting.”

But a Tori source says Candy “knew there would be cameras and had her people call a week before to have the photo releases sent over.”

“She waited until one hour before the event to notify Tori, by email, that she wasn’t attending,” adds the source. “Tori was busy preparing and didn’t get the email until after the party. She was waiting for her mom the whole time.”

As for Candy’s concerns for privacy, the Tori insider tells Us, “It was a big party and there was plenty of opportunity for a private meeting.”

Tori and Candy have been estranged for some time.

Their feud took a new twist late last month when Candy remarked that Tori had abandoned her father before his 2006 death and “that’s what killed my husband.”

Tori has never revealed the reason she doesn’t talk to her mother. (She has vaguely said they just “don’t go together.”)

In April, Candy — who released her frank memoir Stories From Candyland a few weeks before Tori debuted her book, Mommyhood — posted a public letter to Tori on her website, pushing for a reconciliation.

But Tori told Usmagazine.com in April, “If I said one thing to my mother, it wouldn’t be public because if she does intend to have a relationship with her grandchildren — which I am totally open to — I just would like her to approach us privately.”

[From Us Weekly]

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – Team Tori. I don’t think Tori is God’s gift or anything, I just think that with a mother like that, it’s amazing that Tori is a functioning member of society, much less a woman with a certain amount of humor, intelligence, and, dare I say, grace. I didn’t think I would ever use the word “grace” with the words “Tori Spelling,” but there it is. From this point on, Candy has absolutely no right to ever use her grandchildren as some sort of issue to use against Tori.

Tori Spelling is shown out with Stella in LA on 6/3/09. Credit: Johnstone/Buchan/INFphoto.com. She is also shown on 6/5/09 at an event. Credit: WENN.com