The other day I was looking at a picture of my ex-boyfriend and me, and I realized, “Hey, he doesn’t have an earlobe.” Somehow in all our time together I’d never noticed, but he’s got one of those ears that just hooks onto the head. No lobe needed. And while I would argue that he’s definitely missing a few other necessary lobes as well, he managed to make do without them – even the ear. But somehow the realization left me feeling sort of unsettled. I’d been with this no-lobed person for so long, yet I never even saw it. It was staring me right in the face. And while what I didn’t know obviously didn’t hurt me at the time, after the fact I’ve got to admit, it really freaked me out.

Of course, as with most things, when I compare that experience next to Michael Jackson’s, I tell myself to calm the hell down because clearly things could be worse. Yesterday I woke up with – I kid you not – a teenager-sized pimple for the first time in years. I spent the majority of the day freaking out, until I randomly remembered that story about the fake tip of Michael Jackson’s nose falling off in public about ten years ago. And suddenly the new real estate on my forehead didn’t seem so bad after all. So I’m keeping all that in mind when freaking out about the ear – because it turns out Jacko’s got half an ear too. Naturally.

SHOCKING damage to MICHAEL JACKSON’s ear emerged in a close-up picture yesterday. Bits of skin and cartilage have been hacked off for years to rebuild the Bad star’s nose. Jacko has managed to hide the damage under his long hair since the late 1990s when he first had tissue removed for his reshaped hooter.

The photo taken just days ago in Beverly Hills, California, exposes the true extent of the damage. But our inset picture from 1997 shows Jacko, now suffering skin cancer, with an undamaged ear in Cannes, France.

Douglas McGeorge, President of the British Association of Aesthetic Plastic Surgeons, said the shape of Jacko’s left ear was “consistent” with cartilage removal from the shell. The NHS do a similar op, usually to correct noses bent in accidents.

[From the Sun]

I think using the word “shocking” to describe anything going on with Michael Jackson that involves his own body is unnecessary. Really, what could he possibly do to himself that would still be shocking at this point? I have a pixie ear on my left side; perhaps I could sell the extra cartilage to Jacko for some extra cash? Plus I’m practically translucently pale, so we’re probably a decent skin tone match. Though from what I hear he’s suffering money problems – and I won’t part with my ear bitlet for any chunk of change.

The skin cancer thing that The Sun mentions is technically a rumor, by the way. Jacko hasn’t confirmed anything – though considering the tortuous things he’s done to his skin over the years, it’s hard to imagine he hasn’t had some unsavory things growing on him yet. Though he is pictured leaving a medical building in Beverly Hills after supposedly undergoing treatment. With the way things have gone for him I’m sure we’ll find out any day that his brain has been transplanted into a monkey and he’s starting from scratch. Really, that’s about all that’s left that could legitimately be labeled “shocking.”

Here are Michael Jackson and son Prince Michael Jackson II (née Blanket) leaving a medical building after receiving treatment for skin cancer in Beverly Hills on June 1st. Images thanks to INF Photo.