For weeks now, we’ve been talking about Katie Nicholl, the royal biographer best known to me for her often-sugary assessments of the Duchess of Cambridge. Nicholl was able to parlay her long-standing access to the Middleton family into a larger career covering and documenting the entire royal family. Which is why I find her new book, Harry: Life, Loss, and Love, rather suspect. I tend to believe that Harry’s life is being framed, by Nicholl and her sources, through a very William/Kate perspective, whether it’s comparison or contrast. Anyway, Nicholl sat down with Vanity Fair to promote the book (she works as a royal correspondent/commentator for VF), and there were a few pieces of info I found interesting:
When she got the idea for the book: “The idea for the book came about in October/November [2016], and I pitched the ideas to my publishers. Even though it was early days, everything I had heard was that Harry had really fallen quite heavily for this actress.”
Her sources: “As you can imagine, writing a biography on any member of the royal family isn’t an easy feat. They are incredibly private people. The royals don’t grant interviews for books; it’s really not the “done” thing. So, I was very reliant on my sources, and many of these were sources that I have had for many, many years, because, of course, I’ve been writing about the royal family for more than a decade…I had a pretty good understanding of my subjects. Because I had set out to do a very positive piece of work, I think when people knew that my agenda was only positive, they were willing to speak to me.
Harry & Meghan’s wedding: “I think that Harry and Meghan want it to be different not just from the 2011 royal wedding but from the other weddings that they’ve been to. She’s clearly a very modern, independent, and opinionated—in a good way—young woman. And I think that can only be a good thing, because I think she’s going to bring a freshness to the royal family. Yes, she’s going to do things a bit differently, but you know what, from that perspective, she’s so well suited to Harry. Because if you look at Harry, he’s always done things a bit differently, too. He’s always pushed royal boundaries. You know, his mother broke royal protocol in so many ways, and Harry is very much Diana’s son.
Why his courtship with Meghan moved so quickly: “I think Harry just knew. He’d had two big, serious romances. I went into both of those relationships in the book in quite a lot of detail—his relationships with Chelsy [Davy] and Cressida [Bonas]—and I was really interested in why both of those relationships didn’t end up in an engagement. I think when he met Meghan, he knew he’d met someone who was able to deal with the intense scrutiny that comes with being his girlfriend, someone with some real life experience, who could handle the media attention, and who loved him enough to make the sacrifices that the other women in his life haven’t been. I think he recognized pretty early on that there was a real connection with them right from the start. I think it was a real case of Harry knowing that there was something special about Meghan and you know, he was gonna do everything he could to make that work.
She “heard” that he had fallen for an actress right around the time that the British papers first began reporting about Meghan. I mean… she makes it sound like she had the inside track, but that was the timeline for almost everyone as far “who knew what and when.” As for Nicholl’s assessment that Harry “just knew” and that Meghan is “someone with some real life experience, who could handle the media attention, and who loved him enough to make the sacrifices that the other women in his life haven’t been.” Yes. I believe that. Cressida and Chelsy didn’t want to sacrifice their freedom for love. Meghan was willing to make that sacrifice.
What else? Nicholl also reports in a recent VF piece that her sources say that Meghan has largely “tamed” Harry’s bad-boy instincts. A source says: “Harry is a lot tamer and less of a party boy these days. Meghan has really calmed him down. He smokes less, although Meghan hasn’t yet managed to get him to quit smoking, and he doesn’t drink as much.” William and Tom Inskip are planning Harry’s bachelor party (“stag do”) and Harry is “determined that there will be no repeats of Vegas on this stag do.” Meghan’s going to have a hen party organized by the same friend who introduced her to Harry, and her hen do “is going to be fabulous, glamorous, and very exclusive.”
Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.
It almost seems to me as though she’s pushing the buttons that will incense people who’ve already chosen to dislike Meghan, but kept the plausible deniability of “Oh, but I said it was in a good way!”
Am I reading too much into this?
No, that is exactly how I am reading. I also get the insinuation that she is conniving or manipulative. That she is in it for the attention and fame and not completely just for love….which really grates my nerves.
I think you’re reading it from the perspective of a Meghan naysayer. The naysayers are very adept at spinning innocuous truths into vitriolic bilge. But what Nichols has said here–that Meghan is willing to make sacrifices that others wouldn’t–is just the straight up truth. And it’s not a slight! In fact, I think it just underscores how lucky Harry is to have found her. Because the thing is that love is not enough to hack it as a “royal bride” – you need to be able to embrace all the shit that comes with it.
I thought she already had her hen party?
I believe she did… a spa thing, right?
I abhor the term “hen party.” So demeaning. Must have been coined by a man who didn’t like women.
I am just calling it that because it is in UK i believe they are called hen parties ans stag dos as oppose bachelor and bacheloret?
Yes we don’t have the term “bachelorette” in the UK; it’s hen and stag parties. Supposedly the terms date back to Tudor times. In Middle English “hen” just meant female bird (it only came to mean a female chicken later on) and “stag” meant any kind of male animal. So it really just means male party and female party.
@notsosocial – I’m listening to The History of English podcast, and they explore the origins of “hen” and “chick” as words describing women…and you’re right. They were not meant to be used as a compliment.
I believe that was a wedding shower.
While I think I would develop diabetes from reading her book (all that condensed sugar! lol), I don’t think she’s saying anything that hasn’t been put out in the press already. I think Harry and Meghan are a good fit; you can see the love between them. They look like they just really enjoy being together. I am really looking forward to this wedding, and seeing how these two do down the line. I think they’ll go the distance 😊
I think they seem very in like, attracted to each other, attached to each other. But I have always felt love is demonstrated only when two people have the most immense respect for each other? I don’t know how you know that unless you see their intimate lives, and also actions over time.
Also, I too really hope they last until their 90s together!
my concern trolling: it is hard not to look at it like she has given up or changed so much so quickly for harry (job, country, religion, privacy, friends, us citizenship), and wonder at what expense to herself. I know because I have done it!
Plus to whom can she complain about her in-laws, like all people need to do? God, I hope they never hack her phone.
Ok, well concern trolling aside, I hope they do keep enjoying each other. They are adorably cute together.
I’m in it for the babies! My brain has imagined a few dozen glorious combinations of their features.
Of course, they may not have children for a variety of reasons and I will have to be content with fashion.
Oh, let’s hope very much they DO have them…..that way, there’ll be an endless supply of Heghan (and their offspring) related gossip and we won’t ever get bored of them.
I didn’t know he smoked, whether he is a handsome prince or not that would be a deal breaker for me.
Smoking is a huge turn off. It’s unfortunate that so many smart, handsome, nice guys are smokers, because I refuse to kiss an ashtray
There are pics of Meghan smoking floating around. Hopefully, she’s stopped too.
It’s not a sacrifice if you want it. She became an actress and pursued fame on her own before meeting him. She is perfect for this role.
Whether or not Harry’s “bad boy” behavior has changed – isn’t it just possible that he’s grown up and changed? Or at least settled down? I was a lot more “settled” at 30 than I was at 22. People change as they age and its not necessarily because someone else “changed them.”
@BECKS yeah I agree with this. He grew.
They’re an appealing couple. The article fawns.
“She’s clearly a very modern, independent, and opinionated—in a good way—young woman.” Young woman?? She’s 36, married, divorced, heading into another marriage, had (& could still have) a successful career, widely traveled. To me, “young” woman infantilizes her. I’d just say “woman,” as she’s not an ingenue.
Agree. She’s a grown-up and they’re in a grown-up relationship. She’s beautiful and youthful and likely to remain so for a few more decades, but I don’t think of people out of their twenties as being “young” anymore. And I’m a grumpy fifty.
The “young woman” hit me as funny also. And the undercurrent of Meghan “mothering” Harry, getting him to stop bad behaviors and grow up. And how opinionated she is, and modern. All meant to incite the plebs, in my view. Definitely written with the intent to bring negative feelings into Meghan.
This married to the heir negative narrative is what is in store for her and them.
They also call Will and Kate the “young royals” when they are the same age as Meghan. It is a bizarre thing to say but when comparing them to nonagenarians, I guess in comparison they are young.
The term ‘young royals’ is used constantly by media and I can only assume it is deliberately smuggled into articles to give the idea that royalty is relevant to a younger generation. It also keeps up the illusion that William and Harry, heading into middle-age, are still ‘Diana’s boys’. That term is also used to keep them infantalised and therefore not accountable nor responsible for stepping up to full-time work well before now.
Harry wasn’t partying like he did when he was younger before he met Meghan. She didn’t tame anything.
Katie should stick to writing about her favorite girl Kate.
I like Meghan, so no shade intended here, but I think H might want to drop his idea that every potential partner he meets is keenly aware of the disadvantages of being with him. He’s brought that up in several interviews over the years. I mean, wise up.
Harry has made multiple references to the ‘burden’ of royal life and this alone being the reason why women steer clear. He may need to look deeper into himself as to why a woman may not find him an attractive proposition. Part of the reason may lie in his whining about seeing only the burden in royal life when the flip side is that he has enjoyed access to incredible opportunities, organisations and people that would have never, ever have come his way if he had been born to a different family. His privilege comes from birth, not merit. Harry is also very emotionally needy – not a sexy quality in anyone, male or female, prince or not. Does a potential wife need to be nanny and lover? Seems so. But he is a complete fool if he thinks that his status and access to immeasurable wealth and privilege is not an automatic draw card.
I’m not convinced Harry has “changed,” but at least his behavior is on hold. I don’t like when people call women “opinionated” even when it’s sugar coated. And while there are certainly some sacrifices to choosing public life, the castles, jewels, first-class access to everything and unlimited money more than make up for it in their case. I don’t feel sorry for the 1%.
Pet peeve of mine when people call Royals the 1%. They aren’t. Normal people/families are part of that group, but Royal families aren’t. They’re firmly a part of the 0.01%. Carry on, lol.
haha, good point
No, Harry hasn’t changed. He’s just getting what he wants. It mostly definitely is a choice to get involved with the BRF. It is naive to think Meghan has given up anything when she has actively sought a high profile. I think she will relish the role. She will gain/has gained global first-name recognition, untold wealth and access to anything her heart desires. Is it a sacrifice if this is what you’ve worked hard for? I don’t think so. The attention at times can be painful, no doubt, but the BRF also has the means to seal themselves off and can disappear without being detected. No need to fret about the 0.001%.
It will be nice to have a young Royal family member who does not endlessly complain about the media and actually see the huge perks they have because of their position.
x10000
I think Harry issued multiple warnings to the media.. an ISPO? This was probably one of the reasons why Meghan wasn’t chased/harrased by paparazzi. So, I guess that is complaining about the media.
Katie is an opportunist out for a cash grab. That’s why she wrote the book. 🙂
Barf!