Doesn’t this week seem like it started out all Britney, all the time? Britney is not going away anytime soon, because she still has an album coming out November 13th. Even if she’s not self aware enough to realize that she lacks the skills to tour and doesn’t have the body to wear bikinis in front of large audiences, there’s still the perverse pleasure in seeing the former number one pop star stumbling around like a drunken fool. Considering how many times she’s flashed her vag, you know she’s the persistent sort. She’s not about to give up dressing like a stripper and trying to recreate the magic she’s irreparably lost over the past four years.

EW reports that they’ve heard the upcoming tracks off Britney’s CD, and one song has well written lyrics that blame the media for the way she’s managed to impale her image repeatedly. Britney hired someone with skills and must not have had enough contact with them to scare them away from the job. The most likely scenario is that they wrote the song, got the cash, and got the hell out of there, all without ever meeting Britney.

The song is generically titled “Piece of Me,” which reminded me of that Nick Lachey song “What’s Left of Me.” Whoever wrote the lyrics for Britney had enough sense to make it out like she’s a victim of the media instead of the other way ’round – she never can tolerate the truth:

Accuse Britney Spears of many things — but don’t count a lack of self-awareness among them. Entertainment Weekly was given official access to four unmastered tracks from the star’s way-under-wraps upcoming album (label insiders say that all song leaks on websites such as perezhilton.com are not only unsanctioned, but often incomplete) — and the first one’s a doozy. Produced by Bloodshy & Avant, the Swedish team behind her 2004 smash ”Toxic,” ”Piece of Me” kicks off with her standard breathy-sexy growl over a thumping hook: ”I’m Mrs. American dream/ Since I was 17.” Then things get darker: ”I’m Mrs. Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous/I’m Mrs. ‘Oh my God, that Britney’s shameless’/ I’m Mrs. ‘Extra, extra, this just in’ / I’m Mrs. ‘She’s too fat, now she’s too thin.”’ At other points in the song, she refers to herself as ”bad media karma” and insists, ”Another day, another drama/ I can’t see the harm in working hard and being a mama.” According to her reps, the song may very well be her second single after the already charting ”Gimme More.”

[From EW.com]

It sounds like EW is so grateful to have heard the actual songs that they’re kissing Britney’s reps asses so that they will continue to have access to insider information.

In terms of the line “I’m Mrs. ‘She’s too fat, now she’s too thin,”’ no one has called Britney too thin since she had her sons. I’m not saying she’s fat, she’s pretty normal-looking, but she has never looked too thin. At her fittest she just looked lean and athletic, not scrawny.

There are all sorts of angles to the story about how Britney predictably f’ed up her make-or-break career moment. Yesterday The Post said she touched down in Vegas three and a half hours later for her 1:00 p.m. rehearsal on Saturday, then proceeded to order frozen margaritas and food to her room. When she got to rehearsal at 5:30 she was toting a frozen margarita and was uncooperative and unable to do the harder dance moves. (That might explain the weird leg lift over the male dancer that looked like a body lift that didn’t happen.) She was also supposed to wear a corset, but ditched it in favor of the weird sparkly bra and panties she ended up wearing.

The “former Hollywood publicist” JJ (whose claim to fame was working for Kim Kardashian) is saying that Britney was snorting cocaine before her performance and was “completely wasted” and almost fell before going out on stage. I don’t know if that’s true, it sounds likely, but she was out until 4 a.m. the night before and could have been fighting a massive hangover too.

Whatever the circumstances, the main reasons she failed are because she didn’t prepare or listen to advice. People will keep giving her chances as long as she makes them money, though, and there’s nothing like watching her lose it over and over again. I wonder when the media will stop being fascinated with her. It all starts with us, people, but I’m a big hypocrite because I can’t resist talking about her.

Pictures via The Blemish.