Amanda Seyfried has a long form interview in Net-A-Porter The Edit. She met the journalist at a cafe near her home in LA, where she says she goes unnoticed. (Amanda also has a farm in upstate New York.) I usually really like Amanda, but she comes across as extra and try-hard in this interview. That could definitely be due to the writing style and may not be her regular personality. (We’ve seen this with pieces in Esquire a few years ago especially, when celebrities came across badly no matter what.)
Many of us have wondered if Amanda and her husband, Thomas Sadoski, were cheating on their respective partners when they first met on the set of a play in April of 2015. Thomas was married and Amanda was with Justin Long at the time. In Net-A-Porter, Amanda says that wasn’t the case at all. Thomas was not flirty with her supposedly and it wasn’t until they worked together again, in early 2016 when Amanda requested Thomas as her love interest in a movie, that they got romantic. This was their official line at the time and I thinks it’s the first time either of them has mentioned it and defended the start of their relationship.
Her wedding was low key
We got married in Topanga, March last year. Just the two of us. And afterwards, I was like, ‘Can we just go to Cheebo [a neighborhood cafe]?’ It was awesome.Why she had such a small wedding
I get married all the time. I was in a wedding dress last week. I also go to premieres where people take my picture. I just don’t care about all that stuff.She showed the journalist a photo in her wedding gown, eight months pregnant
Look at that f*****g belly! But I really wanted to have rings on in the hospital, you know? And what if something goes wrong, and he’s not legally my husband?Her plans for her family
I definitely want more babies. Maybe three? Or four? Or five?Being a mom helps her speak up
I feel more empowered. Like, I’ll say no, I can’t do that press trip, because I’m spending time with my daughter. ‘Oh, you want my top off for that part? How about we scrap that sex scene altogether? And no, I’m not wearing those thongs!’She had a panic attack at 19 and was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety
At first, my publicist said, ‘Don’t talk about your anxiety.’ And I thought, f**k you, actually. I want kids who are having weird thoughts to share them without stigma. And if that affects my career, so be it.”On meeting her husband when he was married
We were both in bad relationships. [He] never flirted, never disrespected his wife. That was another reason why I thought, later on, that I could marry him.Amanda asked for Thomas as her love interest in The Last Word, they were both single & that’s when they got romantic
It was amazing. It felt healthy and freeing and clean. We can tell the story without any guilt.On MeToo and if she’s had any bad encounters
I was lucky. I didn’t deal with anything that my peers did. People have been s****y, but I’m pretty good at deflecting.
The last line I included above where she responds to MeToo was bad. She didn’t need to add “I’m pretty good at deflecting,” that makes it sound like she thinks women can control those situations, or at least that she has been able to. That reminds me somewhat of Drew Barrymore’s bad take on sexual assault, where she said “I’m scrappy, nobody messed with me.” NO. You were lucky. I hope this interview is a one-off and that Amanda comes across better in the future. As for whether she was “cheating” or not with Thomas when they first met, there’s such a thing as emotional infidelity, where people can bond and establish a connection even when they believe there’s no “flirting.” If this interview was presented in a better context, I would give her more benefit of the doubt.
These pants are just wrong.
photos credit: Backgrid, WENN and via Instagram/Net-A-Porter
Lainey has hinted pretty heavily that she was the one who followed him to Europe on his anniversary trip with his wife. She comes off very annoying in this interview, whether she uses her daughter as an excuse to “not wear thongs or do sex scenes”, being totally offside when she said her husband’s last marriage was a bad relationship, or her being good at deflecting. Just no, pics of the dog only for this one.
That line where she says he was in a bad relationship really annoyed me. I hate when people talk about their SO past relationships in public. You really don’t know what the relationship was like, you just hear one side of it. All it does is anger or embarrass the ex.
I used to think she was clueless, now she just sounds crazy. It’s no secret she slept with him while he was still married. And he’s not the only married man she slept with. Of course that’s not just her fault but her brand of crazy is truly bold. She’s also the girl who said that Dominic Cooper; her ex, would always remain in her life, regardless of them having partners. This was when he was already in a serious relationship with Ruth Negga.
She wants to come across as important for (ex) lovers yet tries to play it off as something normal and chill. It’s also clear she over explains herself when she knows she’s lying. It’s a dead giveaway.
It’s alway fascinating to me to see which Hollywood actresses get the cheater/other woman label and who does not.
There have been ramblings about Amanda online but nothing as mainstream as Jolie for example, yet I think almost every relationship Amanda has been in since she became famous involve some kind of sketchy timeline. Garner and Anniston are two other famous actresses whose past sketchiness seems completely forgotten.
Add Julia Roberts & Laura Dern into the group of women who are home wreckers but never gets attacked for it.
It’s been years now and Julia is safely ensconced in earth mother territory but for a long time, she was known as a homewrecker with her current husband. Does anyone remember those “A Low Vera” shirt she wore when she was sleeping with Vera’s husband Danny? She’s still talking about that in interviews!
It is indeed interesting. With Amanda its easy though, no one cares.
Jolie contributed to the break up a very high profile marriage, that’s why. Everybody involved was either an A-lister or close to it. Roberts and Dern chose people who were either lesser known celebrities or just outright non-famous.
There is something about her that I find disingenuous and fake. Definitely, not a fan. I do appreciate how much she loves her dog, so on that note, that is my something nice.
Same, she just irritates me for some reason.
Yep. Not a fan
Oooh if I were her I would just never comment on anything about that sitch ever. Nothing good could come of speaking of it lol
Sure Jan.
I feel like if you have to give an explanation, you did something wrong
This. Why even mention it if its so normal and innocent?
I find the whole homewrecker narrative a bit tired to be honest. Obviously cheating is bad, but it looks like these two at least left their partners quickly after falling for each other, and didn’t keep anyone the dark for long. And they got married and had a baby, so it’s not like it was just a fling either. Compared to people who have affairs behind their partners’ backs just for the thrill of it, a bit of overlapping can be forgiven.
Sometimes people are in bad relationships that are just waiting to die, and out of the blue they meet the love of their life and they fall head over heels. It’s not ideal, but it happens a lot. My parents were both married when they met, and this once-in-a-lifetime chemistry and emotional bond happened between them. I’m sure they at least kissed and wrote each other letters before officially leaving their ex-spouses. They have now been happily married to each other for 40 years, and neither of them have been unfaithful in their marriage.
Thank you! I was in a dead relationship when I met my fiancee, and I would hate for our future child (arriving October 2018) to think of our relationship as a homewrecking. We both cut ties with our SO’s immediately and have been happy together since. It’s never guaranteed or perfect, but, so far, so good.
2 things missing when it comes to cheating: respect for partner and your current life, and compassion for same
Of course, people go on to be happy together. Water seeks its own level and all that.
This apparent “sudden unexpected attraction” excuse is tired. If you see or meet someone and something deeply twigs, you turn around and leave and focus on your current partner to figure out where you are, and you talk about it immediately. And then you take your time with your current relationship until it either meets your needs and expectations or it ends peacefully, respectfully and with kindness.
For the rest who feel life worked out fine I’m happy for you. But I guarantee, one of them is or has been or will think of what they did later in life and it will have to be dealt with just for peace of mind at minimum. It’s part of growing and healing over a lifetime.
Reference: That movie 45 Years and some personal experience with a tormented ex 35 years later. I’m fine. The cheater is/was not. Not even after a long marriage and two kids. So, good luck.
jesus. talk about an unrealistic expectation about a relationship dying. i haven’t heard of many peaceful, respectful, and kind breakups. save the preaching for church honey. people do the best they can, and no two people’s paths for love are gonna start or end the same way. sorry you got cheated on but nobody’s here for your advice.
@j – it’s not advice, it’s truths. I’m fine by the way but there is so much harm caused by cheating, it’s a terrible thing to do. If being mature and kind is unrealistic to you, well…. ok then.
If someone shares truths and it hits hard, I’m sorry for that. But I’m not here as your mom. I’m here, same as you and everyone, to share opinions, experiences and what not. Wish you the best, I really do.
Well..emotional cheating..the way you describe it..it is more the definition of a friendship relationship..is great/deep friendship emotional cheating too ?
THIS. And can you really stop yourself from emotionally cheating? I mean, if you’re attracted to someone and develop strong feelings for them, it’s not a deliberate choice. It just happens, especially when you’re not in love with your partner. They fell in love, they took the consequences of that by leaving their partners and not string anyone along (for very long, at least). What more could they have done – stayed in their unhappy relationships?
Yes it is a choice. You stop talking. If you don’t stop talking, you’re making a choice to cheat.
If you don’t love the person you’re with, that is a business arrangement, not an intimate relationship. If you’re in it for business or money or whatever but your partner is in it for love, that’s …. sad. Guaranteed to end and it doesn’t have to be via cheating tho if one knows how to be a decent, caring human being.
Thank you! I’m married. Those that mean that I cant form deep meaningful relationships with anybody else other than my husband? Does this include women or just men? The “emotional affair” conversation needs to be defined better, since it get thrown about like its nothing.
Emotional cheating is not at all the same as a close relationship, IMO. The latter is acceptable if you have significant history with each other and well formed boundaries. However, if you’re neglecting the emotional labor of your marriage to find consolation solely in an external source, that’s an emotional affair and precursor to a full fledged cheating. Yes, people should have strong social connections outside of a marriage, but fundamentally, that bond should be the relationship to which you dedicate the most time, effort, and emotional vulnerability.
Well i value friendship as much as romantic relationship, it is just different.
And the way the author described ’emotional cheating’ was more like a portray of what is a strong friendship with boundaries obviously, can be to me.
Friendship is really powerful, there is just NOT romantic overtones in it..it is another animal.
This. Well said Veronica.
I don’t believe that there was no cheating going on before the ending of his first marriage. She seems so disingenuous.
I don’t believe her. “We were in bad relationships,” ok, shots fired. What do their exes have to say or are they the ones taking the high road here?
Well, sometimes it does happen. And in case of emotional ties with someone, you can’t help but getting drawn into someone emotionaly bit keeping your grownd amd not acting on it is all that you can do. And yes, sometimes people are in relationships with the wrong people. It os then better to separate rather that stay in bad relationship or worse – bring a child into the situation hoping it will solve the problem. I however have a problem with what she says about metoo movement and how she resists “wearing that thong”. She does make it sound like she is blamong the victims of harrasment and rape (and how do you know how you would act in the situation you hae never found yourself in?) And she is shading all the women who actualy have to do scenes on screen that they feel uncomfortable with. She needs to take a seat. Just like Ellen Pompeo whom I like very much, but she recently as well said that she was in a room with Harvey but he never made a move on her. She implied he did not do that because she would smack a vase over his head.
You can also be classy and not talk about it. If its merely a bad relationship there is no need to put that out there especially when it looks like you are trying to point at others to divert attention away from yourself.
Amanda’s looks changed so much..it seemed to me she looked pretty different when she was more curvy..she was so charming like that..Now she is very thin and it totally changes her appearance..i don’t know, i remembered her on Veronica Mars, on Big Love, on Mean Girls she was curvy and it part of her charm and appeal..and since a while she losted it and it makes her less attractive, less ‘special’ and more cold and average..just me ?
I’m going to give her a pass on the bad relationship thing. She didn’t say they had bad partners; she said both were in bad relationships which isn’t bad mouthing anyone in particular. It’s just saying the relationship was bad. They could have been incompatible, too much alike, fighting all the time, toxic together, or any number of things.
I’ll also give her a pass on the I’m good at deflecting. It’s not a knock against other women. She’s describing her own experiences. And some women are good at getting the sense that someone is an A1 creep and getting away from said creeper before they have an opportunity to harass. It’s not a knock against other women.
Yeah I really don’t get how we’re criticizing women for talking about their personal experiences with sexual harassment. I identify with Amanda in being good at deflecting creepy ass behavior. I don’t think that makes me some kind of superwoman with some unique ability to thwart assailiants lol. In fact I usually beat myself up for not plainly stating how creepy I find some men instead of just removing myself from the situation entirely. Maybe that makes me lucky, but that has largely been my experience, which I feel is valid and I should be able to share without it being twisted into some kind of judgement.
Regardless of how I feel about her, I do appreciate her attempting to reduce the stigma around anxiety. “Sharing weird thoughts together without stigma” has really touched me. I can see anxiety bubbling up in my 9 year old’s thoughts these days and I all I can do for him is to be open and honest about my own struggles and thoughts. That, and helping him identifying coping mechanisms that can calm those thoughts.