As we saw last week, James Middleton seems to currently live a quiet life in the Scottish countryside these days. It seems to suit him- he has always felt like the black sheep of the Middleton family. His sisters married well, his mother started her own successful business, and his father… seems to be the stable anchor of the family. James has started several businesses in his life, and all of them have been unsuccessful. The most recent failed business was Boomf, which seemed to have folded in the past year. James has opened up about the fact that not only is he dyslexic, but he’s also ADD and he was clinically depressed for a time too. James discussed all of that in a new piece with the Daily Mail – you can read the full piece here.
Depression: “Each night sleep eluded me. A cacophony of imaginary noises rang in my head. It felt as if ten different radio stations were competing for airtime and the din was ceaseless and wearying. During the day I’d drag myself up and go to work, then just stare with glazed eyes at my computer screen, willing the hours to tick by so I could drive home again. Debilitating inertia gripped me. I couldn’t respond to the simplest message so I didn’t open my emails. I couldn’t communicate, even with those I loved best: my family and close friends. Their anxious texts grew more insistent by the day, yet they went unanswered as I sank progressively deeper into a morass of despair… I know I’m richly blessed and live a privileged life. But it did not make me immune to depression. It is tricky to describe the condition. It is not merely sadness. It is an illness, a cancer of the mind.
Defining depression: “It’s not a feeling but an absence of feelings. You exist without purpose or direction. I couldn’t feel joy, excitement or anticipation – only heart-thudding anxiety propelled me out of bed in the morning. I didn’t actually contemplate suicide — but I didn’t want to live in the state of mind I was in either. I also felt misunderstood; a complete failure. I wouldn’t wish the sense of worthlessness and desperation, the isolation and loneliness on my worst enemy. I felt as if I was going crazy.
Why he’s choosing to talk about it: “Firstly, I feel — although I’d never say I am cured of it — that now I understand it and, with professional help, have worked out strategies for coping. Today, I feel a new sense of purpose and zest for life. Secondly — and perhaps most importantly — I feel compelled to talk about it openly because this is precisely what my brother-in-law Prince William, my sister Catherine and Prince Harry are advocating through their mental health charity Heads Together. They believe we can only tackle the stigma associated with mental illness if we have the courage to change the national conversation, to expel its negative associations. So it wouldn’t be honest to suppress my story. I want to speak out, and they are my motivation for doing so.
He was also diagnosed with ADD a year ago: “It was only when, a year ago, I was also diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) that all the quirks and foibles of my character started to make sense. ADD, an adult variant of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, which is associated with children, produces a range of symptoms. And it was a revelation when I was told I had it. It explained so much. It is the reason I have trouble focusing; why my mind wanders off into extravagant daydreams; why simple tasks such as making my bed assume the same enormity as filing my tax return. ADD explains other things, too: why I’m restless, energetic and impulsive; why I start tasks but can’t complete them; why sometimes I seem impatient and don’t listen because my mind is galloping off on some flight of fancy. However, I also see my ADD as a gift: it accounts for my creativity and emotional intensity. It means that I come up with fantastic, original ideas — but it also explains why I have had difficulties with the minutiae of running a business.
He goes on and on from there. I would assume – and I hope this is not unfair – that he merely dictated this to someone at the Daily Mail, rather than sat down to write it out himself. I would also assume that this is why Boomf was quietly folded in 2018 and why James moved to Scotland and began working at a tour/host for his brother-in-law’s family estate. The quiet life, spending a lot of time outdoors, calming his mind, not stressing about running his own business… I bet that’s good for him. I would also guess that this is Nu James Middleton, at least as far as his personal brand goes. In any case, I’m happy that he’s healthier now and that he got help and some diagnoses which made sense.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Backgrid and Instagram.
This can’t be easy to discuss, especially when you have a privileged background which allows you to have an outdoors job better suited to your mental state. I wish everyone could have similar ease in taking time off and addressing the causes of their depression or burnout.
To any people here who sometimes wonder: “Is it laziness? Why can’t I answer that email? That can’t be depression”, well, sometimes it is depression. Hugs.
Thank you for this! It took a long time for me to realize that it was likely not procrastination that kept me from a lot of “easy” day-to-day tasks, but undiagnosed depression and a lot of mental burnout.
Yes and sometimes depression can come in waves. There can be days or weeks of feeling fine and productive and then that lethargy can hit again like a brick wall.
I’m so glad he’s speaking out about this and I hope that many more people do. The more people talk about it, the more people will understand and seek help.
I’ve never thought much about JM one way or another, but he has my sympathy, as does anyone who has shared these miseries.
Wow, I wonder where they are going with this ‘JMidy’ rollout.
I mean, I wish him well and hope he is able to heal – and holy heck his current home and dog pack look AMAZING. If nothing else, you know all those sweet pups are giving their papa lots of love.
But, what’s with the sudden opening up and sharing on multiple avenues?
Yeah, this feels like it is part of a larger rebrand of James, but since it may actually help someone, I’m totally fine with it. To some extent, I think he is offering an explanation for why his companies have been so messy and things didn’t work out with Donna Air.
He’s working with a charity that helps people with anxiety and depression with therapy dogs. I think this is actually a great fit for him.
I…OVERSTAND…every single thang he said above…
Sigh….
Me too! I related to his statements 100%. I was diagnosed with ADHD – Inattentive type last March at age 37. So much about my life started to make sense. I am self-employed and the minutiae of daily business management can overwhelm me regularly. I also have depression and anxiety. His remark about ignoring emails is accurate for me.
I was diagnosed at 23. It made SO much sense. I slipped by the cracks because I was a smart kid who managed to be more on the inattentive side rather than hyperactive. It’s a lot easier to miss because the outward signs aren’t as obvious – it’s more internal struggle.
I used to work at a nonprofit that offered mental health treatment. We were adding ADD screening to our services and I volunteered to go through the assessment and provide input from the perspective of a client. The next day I got a call from the head of clinical services asking to see me. She let me know I had ADD and gave me a referral to a psychiatrist for treatment. My life changed enormously for the better that day.
Same here. And I try to avoid taking meds for ADD but when needed I explained it to my dr as a loop. If I can’t focus and get anything done then the anxiety sneaks in then the depression at not being productive, letting people down etc.
Same. I was diagnosed years ago in my teens, but it was still a fairly new disease, and not much was known about it. I thought it would strictly affect schoolwork. It wasn’t until my son was diagnosed as a 7 year old that I began doing research, and I realized it affects every area of your life, and I began to understand so much more about myself and the reasons behind some of the problems in my life.
As someone who is sitting at home because the only energy they could muster was to contact their job and take a sick day, I overstand too.
I was so tempted to do that today, somehow I dragged myself in. I identify with what JM has gone through.
If you read the whole piece, he talks about Boomf as if it is still up and running except he calls it a “personalized greeting” company. So it has not folded, it’s just pivoted from marshmallows to something else maybe?
exploding greeting cards. I’ve been seeing targeted ads from them for months.
oh dear… there’s nothing more obnoxious than receiving one of those… a family member sent a card to my office and when I opened it glitter exploded out. all over my desk, chair, clothes. three years later I still find glitter on my work clothes at the end of the day …
@Chaine I would hope, given he seems to love the outdoors, that his company ins’t sending cards with the environmental poison that is glitter!!!
@Chaine, if someone sent one of those cards to me at work, I’d probably glitter bomb their damn car. There’s a time and a place for that and it isn’t your place of employment.
@Lady D needless to say my family don’t respect each others’ boundaries whatsoever!
I wonder if he’s got a novel in him, he seems an extraordinary writer. The way he describes depression is one of the best I’ve read. I can almost hear my mother in law “what’s he got to be depressed about?”. AAARRRGGGHH. Anyway, I hope he finds time to whittle away on a novel while in Scotland. I also appreciate him admitting his life is privileged, the fact that he’s made these mistakes without the catastrophic consequences that the rest of us would face with a failed business seems to make him all the more sad; the failure more complete, as though if he couldn’t succeed with all the family backing him then how on earth would he manage otherwise?
Although actually none of the three children have had any measure of career success.
Right? I was reading this and thoroughly impressed.
That was a really good explanation, which I can relate to.
Impressed as well by this interview.
It’s very candid, open and direct.
Certainly he has the dog collection and location (Scottish countryside) of a writer-to-be!
I wish him the best.
+1, his writing is very relatable and I’m sure it will help to better understand depression. His article was the top-listed one on the Daily Mail, so I’m sure it reached loads of readers.
Well done!
Why are all the middletons suddenly giving interviews in british tabloids.also i feel like this is some sad infomercial for the Cambridge’s mental heath initiative. Like, look! The duchess has a sad ADD brother. Perfect product placement.
Also I hate when people write and try to use every SAT word they possibly can.
Do not mock mental illness.
@Cee, I agree with you.
Thank you.
They are re-branding themselves – Carole is really pushing her ‘successful business woman’ narrative, James’s ‘country gent’ narrative and Pippa’s ‘Yummy New Mummy’ narrative. Kate has already started a ‘fix the children of broken Britain’ narrative.
Good for him for getting help but I can’t help but side eye any PR this family give as they are thirsty like the Markles, they are just not as blatant about it.
It seems Mummy and Daily Fail are doing their best to make James happen. It does not seem to be taking off though. The St. Barts’ “not too subtle” paparazzi photo shoot, showed James frolicking in the water like a nymph, circling his New girlfriend every waking moment he was not jogging and smiling at the hills. But still people were more interested in Pippa and “the BFG”. Then there is the interview on DM. But DM cannot decide what to do with the article. At first the comments were disabled. Then comments were moderated. And by moderated I mean, only fawning, slobbering positive comments allowed. Even the British staple “Well, good for him” was missing. Every comment was a five line inspiration fest dedicated to James and his bravery. But then the article was up for more than 12 hours with only 61 comments to chart up, so they turned the comments off again, with only showing the article is shared 6K times.
Is it promotion, angling for award show gigs, resurrecting the Boomf!? He does seem to have a hard time letting that one go.
Carole doesn’t come off well in the James story.
The poor guy said he didn’t feel he could talk to his family and somehow they would try to talk him out of what he was feeling.
Yeah…
While I appreciate that he’s speaking out about mental health, this is very long-winded and over-the-top. It feels…less genuine, because of how it’s phrased.
Wow, nothing is good enough for some people.
Comorbid clinical depression/anxiety/ADD are also extremely long winded and over the top-the effect they have on one in their daily life-it does not rest, there is no break in the narrative to come up for air. It’s an entirely different reality-that’s the point. And he’s illustrated this point exceedingly well.
His descriptions likely seem over the top to you, simply because you’ve not experienced what he’s writing about.
wow, some people on here are really bitter.
Agree with BROS … the message is fine, but to me his writing is pretentious and overwrought.
I am perplexed by the Middletons little press tour recently – mixed in with his public instagram. It does feel like only a matter of time before Pippa jumps back in.
I do wonder if this was spurred on by observing Meghan’s relatives and thinking that because they are such messes and constantly using the media that the palace should just shut up and let them enjoy a little attention.
Good to know that you Meghan fanatics will even try to make this guy’s mental health battles all about her.
Reminds me of that expression : when you have a hammer in your hand, everything looks like a nail 😉
Even james middleton’s depression exists only to thwart Meghan
Yeah, I love Meghan but people have gone OTT thinking every little thing is about her.
Totally, I actually thought this article was really good. I’ve never given much thought to James Middleton, but this was a really good useful article. Many out there are bound to have read and related to it.
Good for him for being so frank and open about it. Depression is the fricking worst.
Boomf has not folded – he might have stepped away from the daily running of the company, but it is still up and running. They’ve changed their products, though.
Depression truly is a cancer of the mind. The more privileged you are, the guiltier you feel about your state of mind and complete lack of enthusiasm and hunger for life. I’m glad he finally got help and I wish him well; this will be a life long battle.
Yeah, not sure where that came from, either? The company is doing well, and has expanded. The additional money from James Matthews went into adding additional products, which are selling well. People do not understand what a business loss is I guess,or what break-even points are , or how venture capitalism works.
Also, he doesn’t live in Scotland, he was only there to recover. He says it pretty clearly in the interview.
The fact that the Matthews hired him to be a tour guide at their Scottish hotel seems really sweet in retrospective. He needed to get away from the city and have something productive to do in the country.
I think it’s great that he is opening up about his struggles.
I feel him on this.
I think somewhere i find excitement in online jewelry shopping because of this. But it is always short lived I realise. I don’t regret the purchases but its not like I go out partying or to family functions where I would get to wear them.
Would have been nice to hear what treatment options he took, if any. From what I read, going off with dogs alone was the cure. I didn’t read the whole thing, so I might have misunderstood.
Therapy and medication, but it’s unclear if he’s on it now. CBT, to be precise.
“It felt as if ten different radio stations were competing for airtime and the din was ceaseless and wearying.”
This a perfect and stark description of what having anxiety and depression using your brain as a playground feels like.
I know it is fashionable to shit talk the royals and the Middletons, but no one should be taking a swipe at this. While you undoubtedly have more access to treatment and resources for treating your condition, you can’t buy your way out of mental illness and having to deal with something like this so publicly would make it even more difficult. I’m glad he spoke out.
Woke up this morning feeling superficial as f:@&. I’m just here for his legs.
Boomf has not folded, you can go to their website and place an order for cards, personalized mallows or personalized chocolates.
The website lists ten team members, Sophie Dummer is the CEO and James Middleton’s title is Wonka-in-Chief.
What a great description of depression. I was never able to express my own depression as well to my friends/family. Getting out in nature does wonders. And you don’t have to be rich. Visiting parks evenings/weekends can really help.
Yeah, a quick jaunt over to boomf.com shows that the business is still up and running. He’s either letting someone else do the day-to-day (which would be a good idea, given his ADD diagnosis–letting someone else handle the details would be a great strategy for that) or he’s sold his interest which again, is certainly better than being stubborn about it and running it into the ground if you are more suited to creating than maintaining businesses.
I feel badly for him. No, he’s not starving and has a roof over his head and can pay his bills, but there is something demoralizing about being the sibling who can’t get their shit together, and it must have been a relief to discover that it’s not just bad luck or bad execution. Hopefully with the right treatment/self-care regimen, he can find his place and be happy and successful.
I feel bad for James, but I also think this is just the tip of the iceberg in the Middleton family. I’ve always felt they were protected because of William.
James wanted to talk his problems, but “someone” wanted a girlfriend public relations roll out before he talked and this story came out.
Also Daily Mail ran a news story on Pippa’s father in law and his alleged issues.
Depression is an illness, sometimes fatal. It’s brave to open up about it, especially in a very public way.
I side eye the f**k out of anyone taking jabs or swipes at this.
Me too.
Right? I’m shaking my head at the nasty comments on here. It’s incredibly brave to openly talk about depression – and in a medium that reaches many people. He is using his platform and celebrity-status for something good. How people can criticize him for that is beyond me.
It is, definitely here in the states, becoming increasingly fatal, as well. Suicide rates are up in every diagnostic bracket. Many opioid/fentanoyl deaths are also suspected to be suicides, but can’t be ruled as such unless a note is left. It is very much a public health crisis. The destigmatazation is the first step. We must talk about this. There *is no* shame…
yes yes yes yes. Depression is an illness not a choice.
It is like the Upside Down on Stranger Things. Everything in your life seem s broken, meaningless, dark, black, ugly and awful. It is NOT being sad. You feel nothing but despair, hopelessness, no point to life whatsoever. The same thing that the day before might have brought joy instead may trigger anxiety which leads down the ruminating slope to depression. He can go on and on and on. Bravo James!!! It takes courage to share this. NO ONE, not even my loved ones understand depression unless they experience it themselves.
I don’t really care why he’s giving an interview to be honest, though an entire interview about mental illness would have been nicer to read from a different publication as we all know the Daily Mail is such an awful news outlet. In comparison to his sisters who both married well off men and his parents who supposedly run a successful party planning company, he’s the odd one out and probably just wants to be left alone. I can relate to his paralyzing anxiety and depression and he described depression really well–it’s not just sadness, it’s an absence to feel any kind of emotion. I’ve always described it as “feeling empty.”
He does have a way with words, unlike Pippa. It seems he has been proactive about getting better and it seems a change of scenery with his doggies has done him wonders.
I think it’s a bit odd to be writing articles for the DM and unlocking a private instagram account if he “probably just wants to be left alone.” I’m getting the opposite vibes – this is James finally WANTING to be seen (and heard)!
Yes. It is the DM part of this story that bugs me. Why not go to a reputable news site, or website, or trusted magazine? Why the nasty, racist, filthy, misogynistic, DM?
@Lady D – my thoughts exactly, why give this story exclusively to the DM???
My guess is that the DM has the audience he wanted to speak to. I’m not sure there would be as much interest from readers if the piece appeared in the Guardian or Telegraph. Nor am I sure those papers would have run something from a royal in law.
Rumour is A PACKAGE deal was made with the Mail from rumour I heard from a person who contributes stories to British tabloids.
1.Roll out of Girlfriend, photos, showing a healthy young man.
Then
2.The story of his trouble with depression.
P.S. Rumour is that someone wanted part two hidden, but he wanted , insisted to talk about it out in the open. So Deal made , with friendly Middleton tabloid where someone’s mother has a friend or two , hence THE girlfriend roll out News splash! First
@Famika, I get the “what”, i.e. the Middleton(s) planted a story. I just don’t get the “why”, as in why do they (or James) need to the publicity. This family is already well-thought of by the tabloid hacks because they’re close and discrete, and the Fail followers love them (“Carole never puts a foot wrong”). So, what do they or James have to gain by disclosing his behavioral health issues?
I have to think the telegraph or the times would have published his story about dealing with depression since it is a serious article dealing with a serious issue and he is royal adjacent. This is at a higher level than the useless Pippa tips.
The DM is not serious in any way though which is why the tabloid gf vacation splash first and then this article coming out seems odd.
Good on him; there’ll be such nastiness hurled at him from those who seek to do down his family, that he must have had to face down a lot of interior worry about speaking out.
He expresses himself refreshingly well, too. I may be quite wrong but I don’t think we hear that much about ADD linked with depression over here in England. Certainly made me take note, anyway.
(And boy oh boy, he wears the hell out of that country casual outfit!)
I applaud him for speaking out about his experience and I wish him well. This is precisely the sort of way the royal-adjacent crowd can use their platform for good. Good for him.
I don’t think Boomf has folded, he referred to it in the present tense in his article but called it a “greeting card company” and it doesn’t sound like he’s directly involved anymore. no more marshmallows I guess.
“Today, I have my personalised greeting card company, Boomf, which I’m very proud of, and I’m excited about future ventures.”
Good for him for speaking out about this. Depression and anxiety suck. It’s so much more than just feeling sad. People can be so judgy and even in this day and age there is a lack of understanding. He seems to be the “screw up” in his family of successful high profile women and I’m sure that affects how he views himself.
It always moves me when people stand up and share their personal stories. I have always hide mine so that my family and coworkers didn’t judge me. I’ve had a few friends who will repost or share things on Facebook about mental health awareness, but when I actually try to open up and say I’m riddled with depression and anxiety they blow it off. Like, no you aren’t, what do you have to be depressed about? Just follow this positive thinking guru I follow and you’ll change the way you think. Most people want to think they are enlightened but there is still a stigma about mental health and there is still too many people who think it is just something you can snap out of.
as someone who suffers from crippling depression and anxiety, it’s hard to see the cynical responses to such a difficult admission.
the embarrassment, shame and self-loathing that come with being depressed are only compounded by the cynical responses from certain people, which are certainly mirrored in some replies here and most definitely in the rest of society.
i also have depression and anxiety, and i’m a recovering alcoholic, and i’m feeling very cynical towards this piece. i don’t really care about how someone so privileged is coping with mental illness – if you can run away to a beautiful scottish estate and spend months just roaming the grounds with your pack of 8 (?!) dogs, there’s just not much i can take away from that story. ive been on meds for 13 years now so i do think part of it is me not relating to diagnosis stories anymore and being more interested in how people cope with mental illness for the rest of their life and how people cope with everyday stressors like jobs, health insurance, family, money, etc because on that end James is totally set. he will never know what it’s like to lose his job and health insurance and wonder how he will pay for medication out of pocket until he finds a new job. those are the stories i want to hear.
and that’s fine, not everyone has to have empathy towards james middleton. i’m just left wondering why he is sharing his life so freely and what his long term goal is with all of this exposure.
Isn’t his point that his economic advantage is no respecter of persons, where illness is concerned? A case of ‘Et in arcadia ego’, so to speak.
Anyway….best wishes to you; I hope you find some relief, whatever your circumstances.
Olive, people have been judging him for donkeys years. Maybe now he has a better understanding of himself he wants to set the record straight. If people are going to talk about you at least let them have the facts. Also it might help other people. I’ve suffered with depression and anxiety all my life and my family think I might be slightly bi-polar (is that even a thing?) and maybe on the spectrum. The things he was saying about ADD rang so many bells with me. Nobody would be interested in my story but if he educates people that’s a good thing. The photos on Instagram are just a bit too braggy for my liking. I’d have been more impressed if they were just of the animals or the views.
@CAL i definitely agree that mental illness doesn’t discriminate and strikes down rich and poor alike, but after that diagnosis, if you’re a man of privilege like James, your recovery can be vastly different from someone poor – it would be nice if everyone were able to step away and take time to recover like James was, but unfortunately most people can’t do something like that.
If I never had to worry about losing my job and health insurance (because these things are foolishly tied together in the US) I do believe that would be beneficial towards recovery. The stability that $$ can provide is a big deal IMO but I think it’s also easily taken for granted to someone that privileged like James because he’s never known otherwise.
@Olive I agree 100%, but since he’s uttered those hot-button words “depression” and “ADD”, he’s created a wall of protection around himself. Protection from criticism, protection from questioning his motives.
Careful, Olive. I said something similar and I’m “bitter” and “don’t understand.” Funny. Here I thought I was still neck deep in a 25 year battle with depression and anxiety and understood far too well. 🤷♀️ Unpopular opinion = pile on/personal attacks.
rosie and olive, thank you for sharing your perspectives. i wish you both the best and am also very interested in learning about long-term coping strategies. most days, i don’t want to survive. the days i do i’m desperate to learn how people conduct active, fulfilled lives while dealing with this beast.
Helen, you have every right to a good life however you feel mentally and emotionally. You would not look down on someone who can’t walk because of medical issues and no one should look down on you because you can’t get out of the door because of a ten tonne weight on your back.
Firstly I went to the doctor over 10 years, ago and was put on anti anxiety meds. I then found not trying to be like other people helped me, owning my own personality, faults and all. I have reflexology and the lady I see is a healer and the best therapist. She holds me accountable. I’m honest with my friends so they know when I’m having a wobble I’m not snubbing them. I also have a dog and when I’m in a black mood I keep going for him. Career wise I get by, ex colleagues have all left me in their wake but I accept that I’m where I am because that’s how it is, it’s how I am. I’ve taken up painting and that helps. Gardening is good. Doing all of these things takes energy and for the clouds to lift for enough time to make a start. Bach Rescue remedy is great for anxiety, I really recommend it. Another thing that helped me is that getting older is absolutely liberating. I’m so much braver now than I was at 30. Sometimes it takes one small thing to change and it starts a chain reaction. That’s how it happened for me, even so I still falter. I think of it like a tightrope, don’t look down, don’t look back and don’t look too far forwards, just edge forwards and keep going because even though you can’t see it there’s probably something good up ahead. Much much love to you Helen, every day you keep going you are winning. xx
rosie, thank you and bless you for such a thoughtful response. you’re an angel <3 <3
Distraction distraction distraction. Helps me the most, along with the meds and therapy. Also sharing, not hiding how i am feeling. If I am depressed and someone asks me, How are you?, instead of saying ‘fine’, I tell the truth. Otherwise I die a little bit inside for each lie.
Most importantly, acceptance, which you seem to have. THat critical voice in my head tells me that by this late age I ‘should’ have achieved SO MUCH MORE. But battling this disease my whole life has been exhausting and terrifying and confusing and scary, to say the least. So the fact that I am still here, have a amazing daughter, two great cats, a paid off house, friends, art work, part time job that is not so bad and maybe possibly enough money for emergencies, I am blessed. Perhaps I haven;t saved the world, but “It’s A Wonderful Life” ,right?
Thank you for sharing your stories. Not everyone gets to have their stories published but they are all worth listening to.
Greygate – so good to hear. Having a child while battling depression is a major achievement. x
I was diagnosed with ADD at the age of 42. I get him SO MUCH.
Also, look at all those dogs OMG I would be in heaven
I’ve always had a soft spot for James but couldn’t explain it, but now I suspect that it’s because like somehow recognizes like, even when two people have never met. I don’t really care if he personally wrote the piece, or the reason why it was rolled out at this time, i’m Just grateful for it. It gave words to my personal experience that I didn’t have before, and I’m certain it will help others.
As for people knocking his “failed businesses”: look, starting any business and keeping it afloat is incredibly difficult. He keeps trying where other people wouldn’t. In my eyes, that makes him successful, not a failure. I hope good things come to him.
I always felt sorry for him too.
And a lot of early start ups fail, people fail at a lot of businesses on their way to a good business idea.
I wish him the best.
But I have never saw the Middletons as some well adjusted family.
I agree. I’m really glad he wrote this, and I enjoyed reading it. It’s quite articulate and is true to a lot of people’s experience.
Very brave of him to come out with this. I always felt that Pippa was very close and protective of her younger brother. I love it that his dogs helped him so much.
Combination of ADD and depression is seen quite often in medical field. It is hard to tell if the two exist independently, or is it the depression that affects the ability to focus or is it the inability to concentrate and take in information in conventional way results in depression. Definitely need more research on this.
It’s very interesting. And I also wonder about the crashing insomnia he describes so well…..all the blaring radio stations in one’s head, the minute the light’s off.
What comes first? The sleeplessness, or the depression and other malfunctions? It interests me because I’ve been full-on insomniac since childhood, and other woes only showed up much later in life.
Brain wiring…..damn, it’s a delicate business.
Must be nice to have money, insurance, resources, etc. I suffer from depression, anxiety, and add since childhood. I can’t afford insurance, so I’m left in the dark. It’s like i don’t really exist, I’m constantly hiding/dying. Depression and anxiety take all my energy, add makes it so hard to focus, which makes helping yourself a battle that drives u crazy. When u can’t afford help, u must figure out how to help yourself, do your own research, be your own doctor. Knowing and doing are two different things. We hide it because we know everyone is tired of the same song and dance. We hide it because, unless u have it, u can’t understand. Why don’t we just exercise and think positive thoughts?! I’m in a constant state of mental hell. Just because i can go to work and pay my bills, take care of my pets, doesn’t mean I’m ok! I’m not ok! Maybe i never will.. is it worth living this way? Would u be able to handle it? Then try to muster the courage to keep going. Sometimes, i feel like that kid from stranger things, who was stuck in that other dimension that no one else could see.
I know exactly where you are coming from. You sound a lot like myself. But I appreciate his story. I feel he did a good job of describing his symptoms. He either had some help or he is a very good writer. He put into words things I could not articulate. Yes he is lucky to have access to help and he is privileged, but this just goes to show that mental health can affect anyone.
Please take care of yourself. Try to eat well and get some exercise, which I know is very hard to do. Self care is hard when you are exhausted from just living. Find little pockets of peace and calm wherever you can and embrace those small moments of relief. It’s hard and it never truly goes away, but I can tell you that it can get better.
I’m so sorry to hear this. I really feel for you and I feel for your sense of hopelessness. I have struggled with anxiety and depression since childhood as well. I have changed jobs many times over the years but thank God I can afford some insurance as a single person with no dependents. However, I don’t use it for mental health and haven’t seen a therapist or used pharmaceuticals. I can’t tell anyone what they should do, as we all are different. I can only tell you what has helped me tremendously and changed my life: changing the way I eat (no gluten, no alcohol, VERY little sugar, very low dairy — basically getting rid of, or cutting way down, on inflammatory foods). Also, getting out into nature, working with plants, reading about plants, starting hobbies involving plants and nature, making projects at home that are simple and inexpensive, like kombucha. Growing houseplants, starting a small potted garden (growing in pots if you don’t have land for a garden). Eating more protein, vegetables, and fruits. Drinking medicinal teas every single day, just like taking medicine (camomile has been hugely effective for me). All these things have helped me so much. I don’t steep in depression anymore, I have more energy, the lethargy has lifted a lot, I function better, have better moods. I still have trouble with sleep, but I’m working on it. I engage in my hobbies — they save my life. I hike, ride my bike, I go on nature excursions. I believe 100% there is healing for you – even without insurance. Nature is very, very healing. I hope and pray you can find you way on a path of healing. I can promise you this: the way you feel now, what your brain is telling you — it’s not real. That’s the depression and anxiety talking, You are not hopeless. Your life is important. You can experience healing.
Thank you both for listening and caring! Sometimes all you need is to be understood! Love can transform anything! Thank you for showing me ways to help myself yesimhere.. i needed that the most(the right things to focus on).
@Yes, I can relate. I hit rock bottom so hard that I had to claw my way back out. I have ADHD (the latest literature rolled that in with ADD) and GAD. Those two can fuel depressive spells for me too. I had to work super hard on mindfulness and changing my lifestyle too. Now I have a pescatarian diet and am always busy with hobbies. They’ve helped immensely. My bf has clinical depression and he’s always busy doing things. It’s interesting to see he never lets himself have any personal time. Not sure I can handle how he does because I’m an introvert unlike him.
I would never scoff at someone’s mental health struggles, but I just don’t think James Middleton deserves attention for anything. He actually quite offends me. His elitist entitlement attitude and his privilege that allows him to cavalierly throw away millions of investor dollars while being thoroughly unskilled and inexperienced at business, offends me. His constant efforts to get himself in the public eye (calling the paps on a private vacation with his sister, BIL, and his new girlfriend, and alerting the Daily Mail that his IG is public and full of pictures of himself and a bunch of dogs, offends me. Now he’s decided that the public needs to know about his mental health — why?? Who is James Middleton? He’s just a man who has proven himself to be desperate to carve out attention from the public that he has done nothing to earn or deserve.
agreed
i applaud him. I believe this was his way of fighting back from being told to keep things quiet and keep the family facade going.
Carole giving interviews about ” Family is very important to me” a few weeks ago, was not just a coincidence.
IMO Certain people close to him never wanted James to talk about this. He is using his voice to fight for his emotional health and some of the family facade be damned!
@YesImHere
It appears you are looking for a perfect victim, someone to tick all your boxes before you can feel empathy for what they are going through. There are no perfect victims. We are all flawed one way or the other and James does not deserve your scorn simply because he is privileged. Depression is no respecter of persons.
I’m troubled by people finding issues with his admitting to depression and ADD but also opening up his Instagram. Just because you’re depressed doesn’t mean you never want to be social. You can have crippling depression and some days are better than others. You can question someone’s motives if you really want to, but people are allowed to act different ways. There’s no one right way depressed people should act in order to have their illness taken seriously.
Aside from the sleeplessness, his description of depression is spot-on with my experience. I always describe it as being like watching the world through a gray screen and living your life 30-60 seconds behind everyone on the other side of the partition. Social interactions felt impossible so I slept all the time just to avoid them.
I can’t say a single remotely negative thing about this “rebranding” or whatever it is. As someone who wasn’t diagnosed with Bipolar II and ADHD until my 30s, I feel for him so much. I hope this change is exactly what he needs and that he is happy.
By the way….it’s horrifying to read of people here abandoned in their own mental health struggle by an iniquitous private health care culture.
One of James Middleton’s privileges of birth is the sinfully over-stretched, often fallible, but still truly admirable National Health Service, available free to all citizens.
I can’t imagine the bleak awfulness of not having this essential support, and sympathise almost in tears for those left untended as a national policy.
Here’s a benefit of the Internet, for sure: companionship in ill health and worry.
Cal, you are right about the fact the NHS doesn’t have the resources to cope with mental health issues. Meds are really all that’s widely on offer. If you are lucky you can get access to a specialist. That’s why I’ve not bothered to pursue a diagnosis, I’m coping so why bother them. James got instant access to a psychiatrist that doesn’t happen on the NHS except in emergencies.
It’s odd, all Middleton kids really struggled to find their way in spite of endless resources. I really do wonder why none of them have EVER had a day job. There’s nothing that stopped them from waiting tables in college, or working at the college library. I’ve literally never seen them hold a proper job, which is unusual even for children of privilege because most parents want to instill these values in their kids. Being unemployed causes depression because we all need a sense of purpose.
I do agree with you, but I think it might be a cultural thing. I’m assuming you’re American (uni libraries here don’t employ students). It’s far more common in the UK for upper class (or I guess wannabe upper class) girls not to be encouraged to work, but just to find good husbands. I know quite a few women who have never held jobs.
I had no opinion on him before, but I have to admit I adore him now! His openness about his mental health struggles, the puppies… He is living my dream life.