Vanity Fair did a lengthy Q&A session with Sally Bedell Smith, a biographer and VF contributing editor. Bedell Smith has done in-depth biographies of Jackie Kennedy, Princess Diana, Prince Charles, Queen Elizabeth, etc. She’s not known as crazy-tabloidy, but I would describe her as more of the old-guard, Establishment biographers, there to guard the status quo of whiteness, you know? I don’t doubt that she has deep sources in Prince Charles’ camp and probably the Queen’s offices too. I don’t doubt that she’s here to reinforce a certain narrative about the Windsors and about the topic of the month, Sussexit. You can read the full (long AF) piece here. I’m just trying to highlight the most interesting parts:
Sussexit signals as early as Fall ‘18? “I had been hearing the tom-toms for awhile—as early as the autumn of 2018. If we look back on it now, we can see the progression of it in the splitting of William and Harry’s households, the splitting of the foundation. And in Meghan in particular—her increasing outspokenness and effort to devise her own role.
The family bent over backwards? “What was so surprising to me was the level of unhappiness, and that they decided to leave after less than two years of being married. I was in Windsor in May of 2018 [for their wedding]… and in talking to people close to the royal family [it was clear] they really bent over backward to accept Meghan. The way they incorporated an African American bishop giving the homily at the wedding and had the gospel choir—they had a lot of elements that were very symbolic of the blending of these two very different cultures and that was the most visible evidence of it.
The Queen gave Harry big roles: “I thought the biggest thing the queen did was—she saw very wisely that Harry is a huge favorite around the world in places like the West Indies, in Africa, in India, and all the former Commonwealth countries that are former colonies. She gave him three roles in the Commonwealth, and the Commonwealth is very near and dear to her heart—and one of the most important parts of her legacy. That alone, I think, was an indication of how much she wanted them to have a meaningful role, those Commonwealth titles.
Charles wanted Harry to stick around: “The unfortunate thing about what has happened is that it really blows a hole into Charles’s well-thought-out plan for a slimmed-down monarchy based on the core family, because Harry was in fact a very integral part. People say that Harry isn’t next in line to the throne, which is true. But what they forget is that George and Charlotte and Louis are not going to be active members of the royal family for 15 or 20 years. So Charles and William have been counting on Harry to be in effect, third in line to the throne and that’s all out the window too.
The Sussexit announcement: “The Sun had caught wind but they had fragmented information that was not all that dissimilar from other kinds of things that had leaked about matters in the royal family. It was something they could have easily overrode or put out an anodyne statement from Buckingham Palace saying, “These roles are always a work in progress,” to kind of smooth things over. What Harry said on Sunday night was that these discussions had been ongoing and the queen said it as well. So clearly they had been trying to respond to whatever it was that Harry and Meghan wanted. And it was really only their jumping the gun with their statements and plans which were still not fully formed, that precipitated the whole crisis. I think if they had ridden it out, this could have been done in a much more graceful way.
The fast-tracking of Meghan into the royal fold: “William and Kate had eight years together and for two full years leading up to their engagement, he was very carefully bringing Kate into the royal family. She learned how to shoot and about the country activities they enjoy. When they were at St. Andrews, she spent time in Scotland on the Balmoral estate. She was able to spend some time just sort of absorbing what royal life was like…and the Palace began to expose her to the public in a deliberate way… In entering the royal family, which provides innumerable advantages and perks in exchange for doing official duties and charitable work, you really have to renounce a lot of things that may have meant a lot to you and dedicate yourself to an institution that’s 1,000 years old. It may be that Meghan didn’t see it in those terms. It is the 21st century, and she was highly unusual [compared to other royal wives] in having been a successful professional woman who was putting aside that whole part of her life [to marry Harry]. It seems now that she really regrets having had to give that up, and what she was expected to do in the royal family didn’t compare with what she had been accustomed to.
What will Harry do now? “I think it’s a real issue for him—what he is professionally capable of doing? Now, look, this is a world where people who have no professional credentials become Instagram influencers. The Kardashians are famous for being famous, but I think Harry’s above that. And that’s not the sort of thing that would make him feel good…or make people feel good about him or the family that he belongs to.
The Windsors will be fine without the Sussexes: “They’re going to miss one of the most popular members of the family. But, what we’ve seen this week, I mean, these events were long-planned, but you have Kate all over the headlines, with her 24-hour campaign for early childhood education. . .You have William writing an editorial with a former foreign secretary in the Telegraph, William Hague, about conservation and the impact of climate. You have Prince Charles in Davos. You have Camilla in a hospice and promoting her children’s family reading program. So in other words, Meghan and Harry are gone, but it’s as if nothing has happened. With the exception of their absence, it feels like the monarchy is in full flying under all flags and steaming ahead.”
“They really bent over backward to accept Meghan” means “they let her choose an African-American bishop, what more does she want?!” This too is the whitewashed narrative about everything that’s happened over the past two years, the idea that the Windsors did the most to “accept” Meghan – because it was so clearly out of character for them, and they deserve credit for putting aside all of their qualms, right? – and that Harry and Meghan just up and decided to get mad and sad out of nowhere. The official narrative always glosses over the very real torrent of harassment, smears and racist abuse Meghan and Harry were living with for years. Also: the idea that Kate and William’s decade-long waity courtship was ideal because Kate was “gently” introduced to, like, country pursuits? For the love of God. These people are so simple.
Oh, and if the Sussexes are not really that missed, why did the struggle-survey go over like a lead balloon while Charles is all pissy about how Meghan’s Instagram pulled focus from him? Is it because Sussexit actually did long-term damage to the Windsors and everybody is covering their ass right now?
Photos courtesy of Backgrid.
Inevitable? He didn’t predict it in advance though did he ? I didn’t remember any articles or comments predicting it. People have predicted divorce on the comments of this site (before the marriage) which never happened. And the bad treatment of Megan by the press was accurately predicted by CB and it’s comments. Didn’t see any one ever predicting them leaving though, and I do read some other gossip blogs and news. If he knew it was inevitable, please tell us what will happen in the future with them or other royals!
An interview I read the other day with Dan Wootton (editor of the Sun) was the same. Pretending it was inevitable and in no way the media’s fault, because the media were soooo nice during the wedding coverage! He completely ignores the two years of relentless harassment post-wedding, and acts like Meghan just didn’t want to be royal. It’s disgustingly one-sided and completely unfair.
So true. Didn’t realize til your comment just how toxic this take is, attempting to absolve them of any responsibility. Super gross, but par for the course I guess.
Lou: What you said is true, but the article brings ONE big question:
if everyone was so ok, so happy, so relaxed about Meghan coming in the RF why on earth anyone did anything to stop the tabloids hate campaign?
And then, the by-products of the big question: why the queen was shielding her Precious, while the press was eating H&M alive?
Why the queen sent a pregnant woman on a trip where the area had the risk of getting “zica” (a very dangerous virus to the fetus)? The staff doesn’t study the countries where the royals go? Even the tabloids new about and reported.
Kate was the only bride-to-be (that I remember) in the RF who took near ten years to be “gently introduced”; so, why MM had to follow the example?
Like always, the RF just wants to reinforce the idea of how nice they are.
It was not a Plan for Kate to be ‘gently introduced.’ It was that William was waffling and even broke up with her in 2007 and had cooling off periods. He wanted to date other people and was said to have been interested in Isabella Calthorpe. WIlliam and Kate were not engaged until late in 2010. It was never really a ‘sure thing’ and there was no plan to keep her waiting for 10 years. She even kept herself ‘available’ by being supported by her parents and having long periods where she had no jobs and a sporadic part time job at her parents business and at Jigsaw. THe thing is Kate was totally dependent on William’s deciding to propose. It was not a plan to “gently introduce her.” WIlliam even said after University he was not ready to get married. She had a long wait.
Well, some Sussex fan did predict them leaving. Hell, I was one of them, though I thought it would be after the Queen either died or stepped down. However, there were others on twitter who kept saying they were going to leave even sooner, and were saying it in response to the RRs who are on twitter and were driving the racist/sexist narrative wrt Meghan.
Everytime a Sussex fan brought up Harry and Meghan leaving if this smearing and attacking continued, the RRs laughed saying those fans didn’t know anything and even called the Sussex fans who said it bots. (Megbots).
So yeah, none of the RRs saw this coming, or predicted it. When fans would bring the possibility up, they were soundly dismissed as either bots or “not knowing anything about the Royal Family.” When H&M made the announcement a few hours after the news was leaked, every single one of the RRs were stunned. And receipts have been kept about all of this by the Sussex Squad fans on twitter, so trying to rewrite history about this isn’t going to fly.
I saw more of a wish on these blogs for Harry to “come to his senses” and drop Meghan and marry someone “suitable.” There were blogs that insisted he should have married Pippa, Chelsy or Cressida. And then a wish after they married that he and Meghan had no children then it would be “easier” for him to ditch her. Then when the baby arrived, Harry could take the baby and leave her. I think Harry fooled them all by leaving with her.
They can’t have it both ways. The Sussexes leaving can’t be the massive crisis it apparently was to blow a hole in all of the intentions the Queen and Charles had for the future of the monarchy if the Windsors are fine because William and Kate got photographed this week and the Sussexes were insignificant. Pick one.
As for the new pushed narrative that they bent over backwards to accept Meghan, clearly the conclusion they want people to draw is that the uppity woman couldn’t handle it and should sink back to where she belongs. Ick.
I think the example they gave was asinine.
Especially how it’s common knowledge that Charles was the one who brought in the Black preacher/gospel choir for the wedding; Meghan has no ties to that stuff as far as I could see.
But as far as inviting her to spend Christmas before they were officially “engaged” or soon after that, Charles walking her down the aisle, that overnight trip with the Queen riding the train, and giving the Commonwealth titles…all within just a few months. They did make an effort to fast-track and include her in many ways. But let’s be honest, that also had to do with the fact that she was willing to hit the ground running. It take Kate, what? Almost two years before she had her own event with the Queen? And that was just for an afternoon.
But after the Australian tour, it all went to hell.
Something I always wondered; they went out of their way to include Diana’s family at events like their son’s christening….But it seems like that was really it. Anyone know if Harry is still close to them truly? It seems like if the Windsors were acting up, the Spencers could’ve been a lighthouse in the storm; especially with how they treated their sister.
Actually EbonyS I believe the Archbishop of Canterbury invited the Reverend Curry but yeah, Charles was the one to bring the Kingdom Choir to their attention.
I had no idea it was Charles’s doing. Was it well intentioned?.That along with Charles walking her down the aisle does seem like they originally intended to welcome her into the fold. At that stage was it only Wills who objected? At what point did it completely go off the rails? i.e. Was Wills waging a media war and Charles/TQ took sides?
And it’s glaringly obvious that they think of her as Meghan the BLACK WOMAN!!! Blackity black black black. “She’s black. That’s what she is. It’s the one main descriptor. When we think about Meghan Markle, we think ‘black person.’ It’s who she is, and what she is, and what she cares about. So all of the things that we’ll do to ‘welcome’ her will be all about her being BLACK! A BLACK preacher, a BLACK choir. We will go out of of our way to ‘accommodate’ her blackness. Not her as a person. We won’t provide emotional support or familial support. We won’t ask what she wants as a human being and person. We will do thing to highlight the fact that we’re ‘okay with’ her blackness! We will ‘bend over backwards’ to show everyone that we see her above all else as a BLACK woman and we will throw BLACK things at her.”
@Amy Too: Right?! Who’s REALLY performative here?
Let’s not forget these people are the OG colonizers. Just where did all of those jewels come from? I believe many are from India… I don’t think “plundered” is too strong a word.
The “commonWEALTH” was clearly designed to stream the wealth in one direction. This is all archaic and, TBH, really inappropriate in this day and age. What benefit – besides easy travel – is there to being part of it for these countries? Doubt I am the only one asking this question right now.
The fact that they think they deserve some kind of award for allowing black people to participate in the wedding is so telling….
That what I got out of it too! “We allowed your people in the church, what more do you want?” I am disgusted
Yes. Yes. Yes. Leigh. I totally agree. That whole article was self-serving and patronizing as F***. Sally Bedell Smith has been taken to task by respected book reviewers, critics, and others for her extreme and biased slant to enbiggen Charles and demonize Diana in biographies she wrote on both of them. She has publically stated that because she has been so “Team Charles” in her writing, that she was rewarded with a lot of access when she wrote her bio on the Queen. I think this entire article is her parroting the “official storyline” from Charles. I will go so far as to think she had talking points and Q and A was staged by VF and Charles’ team to get this out there. Vanity Fair is no longer respected or looked to for unbiased, investigative journalism.
And with this article, we see once again that the royal family is oblivious and tone death to their own behavior.
I class Bedell Smith right down there with Penny Junor (and Dan Wooten), in terms of their neutrality and authority when it comes to commentating about the Diana and now Harry and Meghan in the same breath as the rest of the royal family. Ie: they have none.
“They really bent over backward to accept Meghan” means “they let her choose an African-American bishop, what more does she want?!”
Precisely.
And I think that ““I had been hearing the tom-toms for awhile” is a curious turn of phrase to describe having noticed undercurrents of dissent. I guess that a jungle beat just spoke to her, huh?
Curious and curiouser.
Curious indeed! Tom toms! These people are insane!
Yeah I was wondering if anyone would pick up on that.
“Banging the tom toms” is not a commonly used expression here in the UK at all, there’s no reason to shoehorn in such an obscure term except to be a racial microaggression.
Curious indeed! Tom toms! These people are insane!
Yeah, I saw that too. What a bunch of racist claptrap they are spewing here.
Meghan Showed TF Up and Brought It. And they couldn’t handle it.
VF has sold its credibility down the river for dogwhistle clickbait. Sad!
#WhatAboutPedoAndy
“They’re going to miss ONE of the most popular members of the family.” (emphasis mine)
Can’t get more glaring than that.
Yesssss thank you for bringing up the “tom-toms” comment. I was AGHAST. That could so easily have been, “I was getting some signals as early as 2018” or whatever. It was absolutely intentional to use that sort of language. Racist a-holes. Everyone sees you and your dog-whistle.
Great point. If only she’d taken up shooting! 😉
I saw that, too, and the word kind of jerked my attention back because the use of it seemed super shady to me. Why couldn’t she just say drum beat? Why didn’t she? Well…we all know EXACTLY why.
I really cannot beLIEVE how cartoonishly racist The Brits are proving themselves to be this year. It has just been insaaaaaaaaaaaane. This is reminding me of what their pirate ancestors wrote about the indigenous people they rolled up on during their world thieving/terrorizing era. Looks like they read those ‘reports’ with fondness instead of horror/incredulity and they’re back at it again.
I like that they’re saying it was becoming apparent in fall of 2018, but also are saying they jumped the gun instead of riding it out. They rode it out for a good chunk of time.
One thing I did appreciate is the Kardashian shade.
The Kardashian shade was nice and true, but it came in the context of a legitimate question, what is Harry qualified to do, to gain this financial dependence that has been alluded to? Will he immerse himself in a cause he cares about, and support the family with investment income from his personal wealth? Will he do Instagram sponcon? Sussex brand athleisure? It will be interesting what happens.
Only people who have not been paying attention to this man for the past decade would think that he would be doing sponcon or using the Sussex brand for athleisure…or people who spend a lot of time on tumblr and twitter. Ridiculous.
I wonder if he could join the Canadian military?
Is Harry planning to get a 9 to 5 job? I really don’t see how he can make money if he doesn’t trade on his royal pedigree.
He already has a job producing a limited series on mental health with Oprah for Apple.
Is it only 9-5s that are considered jobs or what? Because I read quite a bit of this here and I’m just wondering if people are insinuating that if you don’t do a 9-5 then you are considered unemployed? Or maybe it’s just another one of those “let’s throw it out there to continue knocking and putting Harry down”s? And Harry is a born prince, he is Charles’ son, QEII’s grandson. He can not trade on his royal pedigree, it wasn’t a choice that he made to be born a prince. He can’t un-be a prince even if he tried or renounced it. He’ll ALWAYS be Charles’ son and QEII’S grandson.
Frustrating and narrow view of “work”. I haven’t been “employed” since 2006 but I manage to support a family, maintain housing, transportation and insurance, as well as travel the world, and I don’t have a pedigree to trade. Leaving my 9 to 5 and making my own rules was the best decision I’ve ever made. I think my man Harry will be just fine. No need to worry about him.
Most people don’t have 9 to 5 jobs anymore. Nor do most people stay in one job anymore. That’s been one of the driving discussion among millennials, about how the workforce and economy these days are not like how it was in the boomer days. The “gig” economy, as it’s known as.
So not only is the idea that Harry has to have some 9 to 5 to be considered to have a “real” job outdated in this day and age, but people like him, with his well-known name and connections outside of the Royal Family, (Oprah, the Obamas) rarely have such jobs anyway.
Harry and Meghan wouldn’t have left if they didn’t already have a plan wrt income streams moving forward. This was not some snap of the moment decision. They’ll be fine, money wise. Harry’s already got the Apple TV deal with Oprah, and I’m sure her and Meghan both already have other deals in the works, and those will be announced when ready, like H&M always announce stuff.
all of this is just so so much like someone leaving an abusive partner. The horrible, scathing, unrelenting emotional battering, feeling like you are wrong just for existing, then finally leaving, only for your ex to just be shocked you left. All that is missing is the necklace and heartfelt card as an unwelcome Christmas gift.
I’m reading the Diana chronicles right now and while I take a lot of it with a grain of salt, it is 100% clear that the Windsors are totally nuts and hate outsiders. They also hate being upstaged. Diana’s crimes in the early years were being interesting to the public and different than the stoic, hardy royal women. The book talks about how both Charles and the queen felt upstaged by Diana (Charles in particular, of course). I am sure they all treated Meghan horribly and did not give a rip that she and Harry were being targeted by the press and were affected by it. There is something seriously wrong with that family and it hasn’t changed in 40 years.
ITA, Lillibet. I lived thru the Diana years, her charisma was palpable, not to mention her beauty and fashion savvy. Every year, they’d sell books of all the dresses she wore, all photos taken. If Diana wore a different hairstyle, it became a huge event.
Even during the engagement, she was already outshining them all. Time magazine put her on the cover – The Prince’s Charmer.
Recently, a Supreme Court Justice from the time of her DC visit (dance w/Travolta trip) wrote that everyone was completely aware of her and trying not stare. In his opinion, she was so much more beautiful in person than photographs.
Interestingly, Tina Brown’s book on Diana — The Diana Chronicles — is considered by many to be the best book out there on Diana.
Tina Brown took some liberties with facts. She claimed Diana was the one on the royal train then later said Charles was disappointed in the wedding night. Camilla was the one on the royal train according to other biographers of Diana. I liked Sarah Bradfords book. Sally Bedell Smith like Penny Junor adores Charles and trashes Diana.
The Queen’s personality has been shrouded from too much scrutiny but she is the leader of that clan and she’s clearly extremely comfortable with dysfunction seeing as her favorite child is Andrew.
I am waiting for the biographies that will come out within two years of the Queen passing away.
There is a particularly horrible, nasty streak of jealousy and pettiness that runs through the Windsor family, and the Queen is absolutely no exception to those traits in any way. Reading up on the history of the RF, while no one will state outright that they’re a toxic, messed up family, this is the impression you get when you consider the various personalities of the members and how they have treated each other over the years.
They are not particularly nice people. They never have been. The Queen Mother was a petty, self-serving a–hole who hated the idea of relinquishing any type of control over her family, both in the domestic and the public spheres. She had a streak of ruthlessness in getting what she wanted, and she liked the positive public attention and hated the idea of being shunted off to the side after her husband died and the Queen became the Queen.
The Queen was raised with the notion that she and her needs were the first priority, because she was the heir presumptive. The disparity in treatment and the way it left Princess Margaret out in the cold had a life long impact on her and set her up for so much disappointment. Everyone in the Queen’s immediate sphere was expected to subsume their own desires to prop her up, without a lick of thanks in return, whether that was Prince Philip, Princess Margaret, or Prince Charles later on in his life. For the latter two, they had to constantly evaluate every decision they made in the context of what type of impact it would have on the Queen. Imagine living your whole life with the implicit idea that your own desires will never have the first priority in anything.
Is it any wonder that Charles is a jealous and bitter when people steal his spotlight, or that Princess Margaret was a petty snob who took so much delight in being a condescending bitch to people? If the only way you can exert some control over your circumstances is by being a petty tyrant to your own family and staff, how out of character is it that we have people like William, who threatens newspapers with legal action and blusters to his brother that he’ll continue throwing him under the bus if his authority isn’t accepted.
This family treats each other horribly. That is what they have a history of doing, and we’re seeing the results of that unfolding before our eyes.
This is amusing to watch. The RF is in complete meltdown mode, as they have exiled their most dynamic family member while the heat gets turned up on Pedo Andy. And their only response is STILL to bash Meghan! All they are doing is showing the world, over and over again, why the Sussexes left, and why they had no choice but to leave. They may get away with tarnishing Meghan in the UK, but the rest of the world (that they depend on for their popularity) is seeing something different. Professor Kate Williams just brought up that Harry was made to give up his military titles but HRH pedo andy has kept his. Soledad O’Brien’s tweet: “Where are all of the crisis meetings about Prince Andy” was a burn as well.
@lanne, well said.
They continue to try and make it ALL ABOUT MEGHAN, while the sex offender is the one they need to focus on. If they keep this shit up, Normal Bill might never see the inside of Westminster Abby.
If they think elements in a wedding is bending over backwards to accept her, I can see why there’s a huge disconnect as to what went wrong. You can’t treat someone they way they treated Megan and think they bent over backwards. They didn’t move at all in any direction and now they’re giving revisionist history of the fracture.
We see the way you treat pedo Andy and how you treat Megan who worked her ass off (and is still doing so) and the family didn’t stand up for her. Not once. (which is something that you do from a PR standpoint to keep the press in check because it sets a precedent, but since they already wanted her gone they did nothing and EVERYONE know that.) That says it all, and it’s the rest of the world who understands, and the fact the RF doesn’t know what went wrong says all I need to know. We know why they left, the question is, do they? Because by this woman’s account they haven’t got a clue.
“Which is something that you do from a PR standpoint to keep the press in check because it sets a precedent”
And also, by not standing up for her and taking some control of the coverage, the RF created what they feared. Media learned over time that not only was it okay to treat Meghan badly, they wouldn’t get RF backlash for it – but also that it really sells. So, more and more articles about her, no matter how trivial – broke protocol! nail polish! closed her own car door!
Hard for the RF to have a publicity impact if there’s 20 Meghan related articles for every one about anything William, Kate or Charles was doing.
As has been said more than once here, they could have done the right thing, caught the wave of Meghan and Harry’s popularity, and bought positive PR for the whole institution.
I’ve liked Charles, actually, and admired many things he’s accomplished. But serves them right they are where they are. It does blow a hole in Charles’ slim down plan, and he’s left dealing with Will and Kate, handling the Andrew mess, and possibly pulling in Edward and Sophie, when he didn’t want to.
But I’m so glad that overall the Windsors will so obviously be fine without the Sussexes, with Kate’s amazing survey and William’s groundbreaking conservation and environmental work.
And yes, that tom-tom remark was very telling.
“The windsors will be fine”
Probably
The old white establishment got what they wanted. They dont want diversity and the uk obviously likes it. Now will the commonwealth be fine? Who knows. Then you have Andrew’s bs which is a lot worse then what the royal family thinks harry and Meghan have done.
None of these narratives make sense nor will they ever make sense until the whole true ugly timeline and story sees the light of day.
I agree! Remember the flurry of articles on how Meghan treated the staff rudely, yet we know Andrew almost hit one of them, Edward doesn’t let his chauffer make eye contact and the Charles/Fawcett “thing.” I sense the courtiers didn’t like taking orders or curtseying to a black woman. Plus, she expected them to work.
Many many former staff and reporters have gone on record about both Andrew and Edward’s overwhelming egos, sense of entitlement, and rudeness to staff and any “little person” that enters their orbit. I find it interesting how they are now rolling out Edward the Meek, when he is known to be such an overwhelming ass. Both of these guys were born with an entire silver service up their ass instead of just a spoon like Anne and Charles.
I heard they complained because Meghan used to hug the staff. Harry was always kind to the staff. I heard Kate was rude when she was dating Will.
I totally remember the article where the staff was upset she [paraphrased] “emails at 5 AM and sends up to five texts a day and how directshe is when she talks to people! It’s so rude”
Uh, she sounds AMERICAN to me.
@JA Lowcountry Lady, oh my God, you made me laugh so hard. Yes, an entire silver service can fit up their bums…that is the mark of a true royal!
The Windsor’s WILL be fine. Brits won’t get rid of them despite the dislike for them. This’ll blow over eventually just like it did with Diana’s death. The Sussexes will be fine too.
I think you’re right. Everyone will be fine. And, unfortunately, nothing will change OR the change will be underwhelming.
I agree. It will all march on. That is why I’m glad the Sussexes have broken away to live a different life. Because nothing will really change in the Firm and staying would have been such a miserable, straight jacket of a life for both of them.
I think they’ll be fine in the long run, but not without plenty of scandals and bumps along the road, which is par for the course of their existence.
Diana’s death never really “blew over” there are still repercussions from it.
The bending over backwards is ridiculous and obviously untrue. Even during the wedding ceremony a number of the family were smerking/sneering at Bishop Curry and the choir. If they can’t hold it together and be, at the very least, polite at the wedding, I’m guessing they were entirely disgusting in regular life.
They bent over backwards by “allowing” an African American preacher who they giggled and rolled their eyes at?
How magnanimous
I will never forget or forgive Zara’s sneering bitchy WTF face when the preacher was at his crescendo. She knew the world was watching, and she chose to reveal herself.
@Jane that totally pissed me off when I watched it. Totally turned me off to her. I don’t care if she was pregnant, it was rude and insulting.
And wasn’t that guy the Bishop of the English (Anglican) Church for the United States? Like THEIR REPRESENTATIVE? IN THE US?
I’m going to shout at the wind so this isn’t directed at you: Bishop Curry is the HEAD OF THE ANGLICAN CHURCH IN AMERICA. He’s the presiding bishop and senior primate of the church. Not some random African American bishop that they ‘let’ Meghan have.
That narrative that this VF article and the way that the family reacted to the head of the US Anglican communion is bonkers insulting. She’s american, the archbishop of canterbury thought it would be appropriate for the US delegate to be present-and they “let” him give the sermon?
And the choir was charles’ idea as he’s worked with their director in the past and wanted her to sing a solo. And then she requested the group and he back that idea. But oh now it’s about the family bending over backwards for Meghan. *eye roll*
@Scal, thank you for saying this. I didn’t know this and if I did hear it at the wedding, I’d forgotten. This makes it all the more disgraceful. That the royal family is sending out their proxies to claim that they threw the ungrateful Negress a bone, when in fact, Bishop Curry is a respected, SENIOR member of the Anglican Church. The Queen, as the head of the Church of England, should have made sure that Bishop Curry was treated with more respect. But I guess she was busy planning the cover-up of her son’s child-rape.
THANK YOU! As an Episcopalian, this drives me crazy. He’s on par with Justin, Archbishop of Canterbury. He’s not some rando, NOT that it would matter if he was.
That same article talks about how the Queen lovingly gave Diana a royal funeral out of respect for William and Harry. Lol. That funeral happened because of massive public backlash against her initial abysmal response.
And then, she made them WALK. BEHIND. THE. CASKET.
That’s not respect for those children. Much less love or caring.
Unforgivable.
I’m still shocked that someone thought that was a good idea. Will & Harry, doing that walk NEVER should have happened. How you could ask children to do that is beyond me.
Yes SomeChick, good point. Grandmama made grieving children publicly walk behind the coffin of their dead mother. She threw them under the bus because public sentiment was against her and the BRF at that point . She had to have known that the images of those boys doing that walk would change her negative PR. Can you imagine, throwing those children under the bus like that????? No wonder Harry wanted out. And not surprising that she continues to do her awful pap walks with Andy. She showed her true colors a long time ago.
William and Harry were publically rolled out for Dianas funeral so they could basically be human shields for the RF. no one is gonna boo Charles if his young grieving sons are beside him. They were made to walk behind Diana’s coffin not to honour their mother, but to save the RFs ass.
That walk behind the casket was a disgrace. I remember watching these sobbing Brits who had never met Diana, many of them eagerly lapped up all the filth the tabloids dished, then pawing at Harry and William when they went to look at the flower displays. It was grief porn, and those kids shouldn’t have been subject to it. It was completely unhealthy, and has led to some people’s unhealthy lack of boundaries with this family. The British media espouses the idea that these people “belong” to them, and that they should have a say in every aspect of their lives. Duties, that’s understandable. But relationships? No way. This sense of ownership is what has caused a lot of the Sussex’s personal grief. It’s the job of Queen as leader of that family to set appropriate boundaries, and her leadership is sorely lacking. She was willing to sacrifice the grief of 2 young boys to a maudlin public display, just as she’s willing to throw that same boy, as an adult, under the bus to protect her idiot pedophile son and her shitty heirs. She needs to be sent out to pasture and retired. Her duty has run its course, and she is no longer up to the job.
The thing about this is also, it’s the Queen’s responsibility, as monarch, to share in her people’s grief. I think anyone would have understood her instinct to protect her grandsons. But the fact that she, as monarch, didn’t do anything, say anything, or even appear all weekend after Diana’s passing, is what had the people turn against her. It was natural that, after the shocking and sudden death of someone who was so popular, so beloved, they would turn to see the reaction from the people who they felt were responsible for her pain during her life. And to see just no reaction from them was what cemented the fury.
I dunno if this was a consideration at all, but the Queen should have made the decision to walk behind the casket herself. I don’t know anything about how these funerals work, so I’m open to being told why that wasn’t a possibility. But she should have taken that task on, if only out of respect for her grandsons’ grief. She cared enough to remain cloistered at Windsor castle without a single word cuz they were a priority, but didn’t care to not ask them to walk behind their mother’s coffin at that age.
I think Charles had no business going to collect Diana’s body from France (of course the reason was then that he was representing William and Harry, but an aunt or an uncle on the Spencer side could have done the same thing. It was a travesty that Charles put on the grieving face following the coffin then tried to play “widower ” Which certainly did not work since it was known he was her divorced husband and was pushing Camilla before DIana died. Then a few months after Diana died off he went to promote Camilla and Junor wrote a nasty book about Diana to help C harles and Camilla. Warped family ‘values’.
I remember watching the Queen’s speech. What struck me was how the queen spoke of her as if she was some public figure, calling her a remarkable person. There was nothing to indicate she regarded her with any affection, even though she was a former family member. Nobody expects the queen to be weepy and mopey, she definitely is stoic. But there seemed to be a certain coldness about her so I’m kinda not surprised about what’s happening to the Sussexes.
There is a way to express one’s grief in a sincere, heartfelt manner that isn’t simply “carrying on.” It is striking that the Queen struggles so hard with even that.
I don’t think walking behind the casket was her idea?
She must have signed off on the boys casket walk. It would not have happened if she had said “no, they’ve been through enough”
It was so bad they made a freaking movie about it.
Yikes. Talk about glossing over all the crap the Sussexes went and still are going through.
” It is the 21st century, and she was highly unusual [compared to other royal wives] in having been a successful professional woman who was putting aside that whole part of her life [to marry Harry]. It seems now that she really regrets having had to give that up, and what she was expected to do in the royal family didn’t compare with what she had been accustomed to.”
Prett ballsy of them to assume this and almost state it as fact. How about the level of dirt and mud slung at her knocked her for a loop and decided she didn’t need to put up with it.
Oh come on, you left out the best part about how this old bat’s son owns a dog named Otto that is brothers with Meghan’s old dog Bogart, and Meghan is heinous for not taking Bogart with her to England. She only took Guy, a purebred, not Bogart, a mutt. She wants Meghan to tell her where Bogart is so her son Can adopt him and he “can be in Malibu again.”
I had read that too and was trying to figure out where she was going with it. Either she meant that Meghan left the dog behind because she always planned to move back to Canada, or by leaving the dog behind revealed what a cold person she is. Bizarre.
Thank you! That was the weirdest part. She went on about how her son has Guy the dog’s brother. And totally put shade on how dare Meghan not have Guy with her now she’s back in Canada and maybe Guy should be given to her son so he can be in Malibu with his sib dog.
Whomever Meghan gave Guy to he’s had a new family for over 2 years now! It was really weird of this Sally lady. She basically suggested she lost respect for Meghan over the Guy situation.
Sorry I think I mixed up Guy and Bogart sorry!
There was nothing bizarre about the Bogart story, I thought.
It is a legitimate set of questions.
(She mentioned the dog’s brother to make it clear she is somewhat more familiar with the dog’s story than any other commentator might be.)
You know, I think Meghan truly loves dogs and I think — whatever the reasons Bogart is no longer with her — that dog is living a damn fine life with his new owners. I believe Meghan when she said he is in a good and loving home. I love that SBS is so up her own ass about this dog and it’s connection to her son, that she things that Meghan should now wrench it from its forever home. Bogart is fine. And now, even Meghan’s treatment of her dog is just so non-royal. And yet —— what ever happened to Lupo? The Cambridge’s dog was ghosted several years ago.
Bogart was adopted by her and her ex. They “shared custody” for a while and when she moved, he kept the dog. She didn’t explain aaall of this in the interview because she doesn’t have to.
Ok I had to stop reading to write this but I’m sure I’ll have more to say…
BENT OVER BACKWARDS TO MAKE A BLACK WOMAN FEEL WELCOME? Did I really just actually read that? You shouldn’t have to exert that much effort to be accepting of ANYONE marrying in to your family. You just do it. And now it was sudddnly the BRF’s idea to incorporate a black bishop and the gospel choir? Lmfao. Who are these people?!
Yeah, I’m sure it was all their idea, and not Meg’s! Ha ha ha. Fools.
This….. Didn’t Meghan have to get baptized by the Church of England before the marriage? How would she know about Bishop Curry? I thought Prince Charles helped pick out the music? There was something about how he loved music.
From what I’ve read, the Archbishop of Canterbury invited Reverend Curry ( who is his American equal) but yeah Charles brought the Kingdom Choir to H&M’s attention.
I read a great article last week titled from pet to threat about how black women are treated in workplaces: first as a pet that is cute and just treated as a fun but non threatening person in the workplace but when that black woman shows initiative or questions things then she becomes a threat. It was a very interesting article about navigating workplace environments and dealing with micro and macro aggressions and just blatant racism that impacts professional growth and reward. This interview is literally the embodiment of that article. From the language of bending over backwards to the inference that Meghan did too much too soon. Basically it’s racism on a damn stick and disgusting to read.
Also the narrative that a rich person won’t know how to stay rich is stupid. I work with financial institutions and these people have access to so many forms and streams of income it’s disgusting. If the Panama papers or any financial scandal has taught us anything it’s that the wealthy will do everything in their power to stay wealthy and get even wealthier and they are usually 10 steps ahead of regulators.
From Erika Stallings on Medium? Thank you for the recommendation.
Yes! I saw a link on LinkedIn from a colleague and decided to read it. It was very interesting.
Thanks. I’m going to search out that article. Sounds thought provoking.
I love how one of the repeated talking points from the British Royal Family is how they “bent over backwards” or “went out of their way” to make Meghan feel welcome, and the example always given of their over-the-top largess is [checks notes]…Letting a bride participate in planning her own wedding. 🙄
I’ve also read (maybe Richard Kay in the DM?) that Meghan should have been more grateful to Charles for allowing her to have a church wedding since the Queen did not think she deserved one as a divorced woman.
It’s so annoying. They really act like Meghan was marrying herself. Harry was always going to get a wedding befitting his place and role in the family.
I mean, Richard Kay likely doesn’t realize that by saying that, he’s not portraying the Queen in a good, positive light at all. He paints her as a shrew who never fully let go of her prejudices she grew up with and had to be forced into hiding them because public opinion had left her long in the dust when it came to these things.
I was also in Windsor for the wedding at a Facebook party in the hotel where most of the media were staying. Sally Bedell Smith was also there. It’s clear given her books about the Queen & Prince Charles, and the hatchet job she did on Princess Diana, diagnosing her with borderline personality disorder, amongst other things, that she is firmly in the Windsor camp. The RF did not bend over backwards for Meghan, apart from allowing her to spend her 1st Xmas at Sandringham. Prince Charles was the one who suggested the Freedom Choir, and the Archbishop of Canterbury suggested Bishop Curry. This all boils down to jealousy in my opinion, both Prince Charles & Prince William hate the fact that Prince Harry, and then Harry & Meghan were more popular. Also, that in a year of marriage, Meghan accomplished more than Kate did in almost ten years of marriage. I think that both Harry & Meghan felt stifled, that they couldn’t do more because it would overshadow William & Kate who try to do as little as possible. Well, now they are going to have to step up to the plate and do more engagements. Let’s not forget that during the first 2 years of her marriage, Kate & William were living in Wales, so that William could continue to be a part-time royal. I like how it was fine for William & Kate but not Harry & Meghan.
To try and reframe William’s temper tantrum and abject refusal to become a full time royal as him “easing” into the role is just egregious imo. It’s a flat out lie. William spent the better part of his 20s doing everything he could to avoid the responsibilities of being a full time royal. The Queen and her staff acquiesced because their top priority was to keep him happy since he was the heir. This was not a wise decision on his part, it was a strop that he was ultimately rewarded for by getting his way.
Is the same lady that wrote a book on Diana and trashed her but her books on the Queen and Charles were nothing but praise? She is clearly working for the RF.
The RF knows how bad they look and are desperately trying to look like this loving, welcoming family. Harry and Meghan quit the RF and moved to Canada. That tells you all you need to know. The RF are cold and harsh. They hate outsiders. Good luck to them.
SBS should refresh her memory by delving into the VF archives, the 2011 article on Andy. It’s about his years’ long frienship with Jeffrey Epstein and for all the kerfuffle, queenie bestows an honor on sonny boy as a form of royal protection from that bit of messiness. And in 2020 the queen still shields her favored son with her presence while riding to church in full view of photograpers. But by all means, the royals are upset about the breaking of protocols (would someone spell out what protocols were broken?). The RF reminds this oldster of junior high, filled with all manner of backstabbing. This racist and calcified lot!
Every single “protocol” Meghan supposedly broke, pictures came out of Diana, Kate, and even Anne doing or wearing the same damn thing. The only protocol Meghan broke was DUCHESSING WHILE BLACK.
And DUCHESSING SO AMAZINGLY that Charles, William and Kate lost their minds. How dare she work????? How dare she care so much????? This family now disgusts me. If Meg and Harry don’t do some kind of tell-all they are 1000% the human I am.
A lot of revisionism going on as especially in light of support for Andrew& news coming out of the US that he isn’t cooperating, lots of people are contrasting the treatment of the Sussexes.
Also telling that most ‘support’ amounts to having a black priest& musicians/singers at the wedding (the choir being suggested by Charles), the commonwealth roles (not like they didn’t put in work in these roles with 4 tours inc one where she was heavily pregnant), office at BP& doesn’t look like much else after. Whereas with Andrew the palace have been briefing reporters that he’s been a great support with Sussexit. So they know how to signal support with the press.
As if she wasn’t already racist and xenophobic, she had to quadruple down on it with the ‘tom-toms’ remark.
The only thing worse would have been the use of “jungle drums,” but this was damn near as offensive. She knew exactly what she was doing when she wielded that terminology.
The whitewashing of the W&K “courtship” is alive and well I see. Old girl wasn’t gently and carefully brought into the fold. She merely waited William out until he realized she was practically his only option. She got to know protocol, the fold’s hobbies and such primarily through proximity to William, not some carefully laid out plan.
Jeez!
Also, “we let her use a black preacher” doesn’t count as welcoming her to the family and including her. Finding ways to integrate her strengths, talents, and ideas would have. Instead, they sidelined her at every opportunity and framed her every effort as “against protocol” even when there was no such precedent.
The lies they tell.
Yeah, I love how the notoriously private William has recently allowed access to his family and his and Kate’s love story. Rose —and all his other bushes — must be laughing their collective asses off over this new narrative.
But *why* did they have to “bend over backwards” to accept Meghan? Meghan, the grown-up, professional, accomplished woman Harry brought home, whom any family not made up of colonial racists would be glad to meet? I don’t think they realize how bad “bend over backwards to accept her” sounds to anyone who does not have a problem with who Meghan is, which is most people.
Also, worry about what Harry will do as a “private” citizen? Harry, the guy who set up two major philanthropic foundations? Yeah, however will he occupy his time?
Thank you Algernon. Harry has already proved himself successful in creating huge charitable endeavors. He will be just fine going forward. I can’t wait to see what they both accomplish in this field of work.
The press act like Harry sits around and drools all day and Meghan has to change his diaper.
Harry is a decorated military man and set up two huge projects. He is clearly intelligent and will have a ton of projects now that he doesn’t have the RF holding him back. I can’t wait to see what he will do.
Great point Algernon. Yes Harry is a Prince and Meghan is divorced (like 3 out of 4 of the Queen’s children but whatever) but Meghan had a prestigious education, probably most independently wealthy royal bride, good public speaker, lots of experience of charity work so really should have been seen as a win not someone to “accommodate”.
In fact I remember before the ‘Meghan has driven all his friends away “ smears there was talk that his friends were telling Harry to hurry up& marry Meghan. So this narrative is pretty awful.
@Guestone Tom Bradby wrote that article on Harry’s friends urging him to marry Meghan. Bryonny ( journalist and friend) said that Meghan also urged Harry to go public with his mental health. His friends have said that Meghan has been a positive force in his life. He was also seen at a pub with 7 of his friends a couple weeks ago in the U.K. The press are desperate to paint Meghan in a bad light.
Also, even if he didn’t have any functional skills to cope in a “normal” work place–who’s to say he can’t learn them? He’s not even 40 yet. The notion that he can’t do anything to improve himself, to learn new skills, to go back to school if he so chooses (which is an option for him now!), to get people to come in and teach him on a private one-on-one basis on any topic he desires, to gain experience by volunteering…the possibilities are endless. Yes, it’s tough, the learning curve is high, and it feels exasperatingly useless sometimes, but if you persevere, which Harry is perfectly capable of doing, he can absolutely establish a career for himself based on his own abilities.
This goes to show you just how out of touch these troglodytes are in reality. The royals have never worked a day in their life, to the point where they don’t even *know* what it takes to establish a career. Working for a living is for peasants after all. It also shows you just how fundamentally anti-intellectual they are as a culture. Yes, Charles is very smart, he writes lots of letters, he does a lot of work on organic farming, he probably reads a lot etc, but he is the exception, not the norm, and he probably thinks very lowly of Harry’s capabilities, which is disgraceful on every level. Is it any wonder that Harry left them behind?
My husband is a 36 year old, husband and father, who works full time, does a ton of work around our house, fixes our cars himself, and who is currently going back to school to get a 4 year degree in computer programming. Just last year he completed enough coursework to get his associates degree and we are so proud of him. We are also poor, he is not even a US citizen, and he gets no preferential treatment when it comes to scheduling his classes, building his degree, the workload, selecting his professors, or getting tutors or any extra help along the way. So it can absolutely be done! Especially with all of Harry’s advantages, fame, money, contacts, friendships, and people whose sole job is to help him live the life of a royal Prince (nannies, housekeepers, chefs, security team, personal assistants, PR people, personal lawyers, personal financial advisor, etc). People keep acting like Harry is a “finished product,” who is stuck right now at this level of education, work experience, emotional intelligence, and life experience. Like he’s not able to grow as a human being at all beyond where he’s at right now. That’s not how life works, at all.
That’s also not how money works. I’m surprised at people who think that he has X amount of money and that it’s a finite number. Money makes money. His money is probably invested in such a way that he very rarely has to touch the $40,000,000+ principle, unless he wanted to do something like buy a mansion right now all with cash. That’s something else that is weird to me. People keep citing their supposed expenses, like a $14 million home, as if financing doesn’t exist. Rich people also do mortgages and payment plans.
I’m really beginning to wonder if the Windsors will be “fine.”
Oh, I don’t mean they’ll be forced out or have to get real jobs. But even this subtler-than-others hit piece admits they lost one of the most popular members of the family, all while another member is revealed to be complicit in heinous crimes. Elizabeth doesn’t have much longer, and there’s a reason the bulk of interest is in Will vs. Harry — very few people actually LIKE Charles. They won’t be able to weaponize the nostalgia of another immediate family wedding for decades. Again, I don’t think we’re anywhere near seeing them hated or harassed in the streets — but people might actually start to get bored of them. And their real job right now is to be fascinating. (Which is why the instagram influencer shade is so funny. Talk about the original “famous, but does nothing” family.) And just on a practical note — if it were so obvious they were going to be fine, I don’t feel like people would feel the need to keep INSISTING they will be fine.
Anyway, the take that William did Kate some kind of favor by prolonging their courtship for almost a decade is……….. new. Especially in the British media.
These people.
They just can’t get their stories straight. The litany of narratives emerging out of their respective offices just keeps nailing that coffin shut. That poor coffin. It’s literally spiked with nails.
You know, the “Sandringham Summit” was frankly useless in the long run. Because it really didn’t accomplish anything (see also: the previous paragraph).
Anywho, here’s what needs to happen: Her Majesty needs to gather the entire crew – the senior royals and their working staffs – kind of like an “all hands” meeting as they’re known here in the U.S., and lay down the GD law and set new policies and procedures for media strategy, press rules and – most importantly – how to address the Leakers. Britain should strengthen their NDA laws and the BRF should (if they haven’t already) put all their squeaky-leakies on notice that anyone caught feeding stories to the British tabs will be fired, black-balled and legally sanctioned. As well, they should enfold the NDAs into binding arbitration agreements, so that their employees have to deal with this issue privately.
After all, the biggest issues emerging out of “The Firm” have to do with their blabbing courtiers and lax, all-over-the-board approach to the media. Her majesty and Charles need to crack the whip and put a stop to it and find a way to build a more cohesive media strategy that puts all three courts on the same page. Because right now? You have a ruling monarch and two heirs that can’t get their shit together. This 1960s approach didn’t work then and it’s especially outdated and naive in this day and age.
The age of Social Media is no joke. It’s taken down the powerful, it has fomented revolutions and uprisings around the world and it threatens to take down the British Royal family. They are not immune to the power of the digital landscape.
Kudos, Anon!!! I think the biggest obstacles to HM and Charles doing that is fear. They are terribly afraid of the press, because the press knows where all, or at least a lot of, the bodies are buried. In order to have that kind of access to the RF, some pretty juicy tidbits had to be given to them as a sign of good faith. That’s all well and good when things are going nicely, but in a hellish situation like this one, all that changes. They know the minute they try to stop the leaks, or threaten legal action, all those skeletons come tumbling out of the closet. Just look at the insane lengths the tabloids are going to in an effort to stop the Sussex lawsuits. In a normal corporate setting, heads would roll, and new PR measures would be taken to turn this thing around. However, the press has the upper hand with the Windsors, and they know it. They have well and truly botched this over the last few decades, little by little, and they are out of maneuvering room.
All of this! +10000
In addition to setting down some firm rules when it comes to interacting with the media and the leaking of information from different camps in the RF, these people need to start cultivating some major levels of empathy and compassion for each other. Period. That has to start with not treating George and his siblings like they’re two separate tiers of people within their own gd family.
These people continue to get into these situations because they have been raised to fundamentally have zero respect for each other aside from what they can do for each other’s advancement. It is not normal for Charles to be a 70 year old man who still gets so extraordinarily upset when he feels he’s being upstaged, by his own children nonetheless. It is not normal for there to be this environment where you literally view your immediate family as cutthroat competitors.
I’m not gonna stand on an idealistic soap box and act like all families have to love each other unconditionally blah blah blah. But these people don’t even respect each other on a bare minimum level. They have no clue what it means to treat another person with basic human decency. That is alarming. There’s a clear pattern of really egregious behaviour here from the last few decades at the very least, and the toxicity has to be addressed.
I think, especially with Charles, but also with William and all the kids who will come after him, that the waiting period to get the top spot has to have something to do with how screwed up they all are. Historically, people became the King in their 30s and 40s. They were in the prime of their life mentally and physically which made sense for an absolute monarch who had tons of power and who was also in charge of the church and the military. Now the top job is mostly ceremonial, but it still has more power than the heir and the heir’s heir.
Charles has been waiting and training for over 70 years for what is meant to be the most important job of his entire life. His whole life has been about the fact that he will be King someday, but he’s not King yet. His entire life has been about “what will you do when you’re king?” but he’s an old, old man now and he STILL can’t implement his ideas. The Prince of Wales is supposed to be, historically, a 25 year old fuckboi, basically. Hanging out and having fun with mistresses, partying, maybe reviewing your troops every now and then, and finding a bride while you wait to be King. It’s a 10-15 year long stopover on the way to being the monarch. Charles is over 70 years old. He’s completely exhausted the PoW role and he outgrew it 35 years ago. Yet he’s still there. “Important,” but not really. He’s in this weird limbo. And the monarchy and the U.K. have changed so much in 70 years. Charles was trained to be King 50+ years ago. Any radical and cool new ideas he has then, are old news and outdated now. That has to suck.
It’s even worse for William, as he’s not even the next king, but the future, future king. The Duke of Cambridge, the first child of the Prince of Wales, is historically meant to be about 6 years old. Not a 40 year old husband and father of 3. What is he seriously supposed to do with his current job? He’s been raised to be a King, to act like a King, but he can’t be a King and do King things for another 25+ years. He can’t even do Prince of Wales things because he’s not the Prince of Wales. The main “job” of the Duke of Cambridge is to be born, baptized, and go to school. It’s set up for babies and children. It’s a royal duchy and honorary title, without any responsibilities. So it’s not like he has a 600 year old estate to keep up where he could work on the house, the gardens, the estate’s farms and forests, be in charge of dealing with his tenants, or have a position as magistrate in the county, or even serve in the House of Lords like other Dukes. Being a Duke with an actual estate like that is a full time job. Being a royal Duke without any of the responsibilities that normally come with being a Duke, living in a grace and favor house that you don’t technically own and is not going to be passed onto your kids, leaves you with not much to do. And no real connection to the title or office of Duke of Cambridge. And yet these people, Charles and William, and now George, are stuck in these pretty meaningless holding pattern positions for most of their lives. The “most important” people in the U.K., in the family, but with no real power, no real work, nothing to actually DO.
I don’t fully agree that Charles is antsy because of how long he has been waiting. He wasn’t “in waiting” this long when he married Diana, and she had to deal with the full force of his jealousy. The Queen wasn’t in waiting to ascend the throne either, and I feel as though a lot of the dynamics in this family stem from her and her inability to confront or be honest about her own feelings, most notably her own jealousy and frustrations with the role she’s been bestowed. These people aren’t the way they are because they’re bored. They are the way they are because they all feel incredibly entitled to behave the way they do, and that entitlement has been largely encouraged by the specific culture of the royal family/monarchy. Their entitlement would not be any more alleviated by them having roles that have a purpose, in fact, it would probably vastly increase their inflated sense of superiority if they had even the slightest modicum of power.
The monarchy in Britain, within their own little macro world, is an incredibly strictly enforced hierarchy. You know your place, and you stay within it, and you don’t question anything. Above all else, you allow your own desires and wants about the type of life you wish to lead to be subsumed to the wishes and expectations of the monarch and their direct line heirs. If you are not in the direct line to the throne, your needs are not prioritized, and the sooner you resign yourself to that fact, the better it will be for you. The direct line heirs are the most important because they will be the monarch some day, and preserving that unbroken inheritance without any blips or lapses is crucial to the sustained existence of the monarchy.
This is why Charles struggled his whole life and sees fit to throw his own weight around in his old age. The whole time he was growing up, he had to submit to whatever his mother, the monarch, wanted. His needs came secondary to the needs of the monarchy, but were always prioritized over those of everyone else based on his rank. When he married Diana, she occupied the press and the public spotlight at what he perceived was his direct expense. He wanted the popularity and the adulation that he felt he deserved and that he told he had always been entitled to because he was Prince of Wales and the next monarch. So to have a woman who married in overshadow him and take the media attn he felt he rightfully DESERVED was aggravating.
This is the same sense of entitlement that William has been raised with. He has been raised with the understanding that because he is the heir presumptive, his needs are the priority over everyone else’s, most notably his brother. William was largely catered to and coddled and Harry was raised with the understanding that he would fall in line with his brother’s wishes, and so would any spouse who married him. And then came Meghan, who once again upset the internal order that had been promised to William. William, more than any other direct line heir, has had his desires fully catered to at every turn. When that didn’t happen here, he threw a tantrum.
This is the culture that the RF needs to overhaul as a whole. Stop treating the heirs and the spares differently. When you prioritize one kid at the expense of the others, the resentment breeds itself, and this is what has set up the royal family for failure time and again.
Amy Too- You made so many great points about extended lifespans effecting the functioning of the BRF. Made me think of poor Henry II.
A- Your point about simply having and teaching more compassion is dead on. I do think that the only reason the Windsors have been able to continue to exist is because of that system of individuals subsuming themselves for the sake of the family (which is how all families once were, historically), and I’m not going to judge the system itself negatively. In many areas of the world this is still how families function. But compassion is necessary. (How strange, when discussing a family, to have to say that.)
Over-indulging the heir is extremely destructive. I understand that they probably attempt to use it as a sweetener to try to counterbalance the burden of responsibility they’ll have to carry as monarch- and also, more cynically, to make it impossible for the heir to ever leave. Harry will be able to function without his every need being catered to, I doubt William ever could. So given the practical nature of some of these customs that can be/are destructive for the individual but not necessarily for the system as a whole, I’m not sure what changes they can make to fix things. Ideally they could all be brought up from childhood in the Stoic philosophy, but since Charles is the only one who’s even close to being intellectual, and since that doesn’t seem to be what the English want from their royals, I don’t know. It will be interesting to see what happens.
In addition to setting down some firm rules when it comes to interacting with the media and the leaking of information from different camps in the RF, these people need to start cultivating some major levels of empathy and compassion for each other. Period. That has to start with not treating George and his siblings like they’re two separate tiers of people within their own gd family.
These people continue to get into these situations because they have been raised to fundamentally have zero respect for each other aside from what they can do for each other’s advancement. It is not normal for Charles to be a 70 year old man who still gets so extraordinarily upset when he feels he’s being upstaged, by his own children nonetheless. It is not normal for there to be this environment where you literally view your immediate family as cutthroat competitors.
I’m not gonna stand on an idealistic soap box and act like all families have to love each other unconditionally blah blah blah. But these people don’t even respect each other on a bare minimum level. They have no clue what it means to treat another person with basic human decency. That is alarming. There’s a clear pattern of really egregious behaviour here from the last few decades at the very least, and the toxicity has to be addressed.
ALL. OF. THIS. Every last word.
These people are so disgusting. And so fucking transparent.
They’re dragging anyone they can think of out of the woodwork to tell us how unimportant the Sussexes are and how nobody is going to miss them. If that’s the case, then WHY DO THEY KEEP TALKING ABOUT THEM? I don’t give people I don’t care about a second thought. Cambridge fans spend more time and energy talking about Meghan than they do about the people they think are practically perfect in every way.
How dare this creature dismiss Harry that way! Prince Harry is a decorated veteran who served his country well. He’s one of the creators of the Invictus Games which has helped wounded veterans all over the world. His charity for AIDS orphans has helped children in Africa for years.
Was allowing a bunch of Black people into their hallowed halls such a sacrifice? Is that why Keen Katie and the York sister were snickering so much?
These people are BENEATH CONTEMPT.
I see these people aren’t interested in the boring Cambridges so much that they have to keep going on about Harry and Meghan. I guess the rest of the royal family isn’t as interesting. The media will be coming after them soon enough.
All these revisionist articles are closing the barn door after the horse has run away. So much is already out and people can read the nasty press articles with their own eyes. I’m sure people like this writer believe that Meghan was welcomed the same way one thinks they’re welcoming by letting servants go through the front door or take their hand-me-downs. I was totally checked out of the Royals after the wedding, but started seeing these nasty articles in Vanity fair about Meghan after the Oceania/Australia tour, and something didn’t pass the smell test. I’ve been very much supportive of her and Harry since then. Nothing they did warranted the treatment they received, and the U.K. is diminished in my eyes. I’m originally from the Commonwealth, I have relatives who have met the Queen, and never really thought much of it, but now; the U.K. has the monarchy they deserve, is all I can say.
I have been wondering lately if Sussexit had been Harry’s plan all along, even before they married. Maybe one of reasons Meghan agreed to marry into such an archaic institution in the first place was because Harry assured her that when the time was right, they’d leave?
I think Meghan honestly believed that she could change the archaic institution. Once she awoke Charles’ and Williams’ jealousy though?? I think she and Harry had no idea how bad it would get. But being really lively and intelligent and happy together … they decided to leave.
I don’t even think she wanted to change the institution – she didn’t really do anything differently than anyone else in the family; she just worked smarter and harder and with enthusiasm – but nothing she did was new. They changed the rules when she got there, and then changed them back when she left.
Yes, I think she went in with full good-faith. They had the chance for true influence on the global stage- maybe even enough to keep the Commonwealth together- just by embracing her, and they blew it.
Random thought, I went back and watched the reactions to Harry & Megan’s wedding ceremony. Many members of the RF were rude, and in retrospect barely covering their disapproval.
Life is long, and this family that thinks they are so much better than everyone else will have to answer for it. My god, they really are bastards aren’t they?
Yeah HK9, their behavior was astonishing. I didn’t see the wedding live. I had heard about Rev. Curry’s uplifting sermon so I actually sought out the video to see that as well as the wedding itself. It was a fantastic sermon. For a Christian, it speaks to the heart of the faith. So much of what Christians are criticized for today is our lack of love and rush to judgement and Bishop Curry put the redemptive, transformative power of love front and center of attention, as it should be.
I couldn’t help but think if any of these smirking jerks actually stopped to listen and take to heart the message he was trying to convey, their lives wouldn’t be so barren and petty. William’s in particular.
Instead we have Zara complaining in a very snooty, dare I say uppity way that the sermon was too long. I understand she was uncomfortable due to the baby kicking her but she was very snide in her explanation. There was also a commentator in the video I watched, a white British man, who seemed personally affronted and made it clear that long sermons like this just weren’t done.
Really, this was the most exciting and interesting royal wedding I’d ever seen and if Charles had a hand in recommending any part of it, good for him, there may be hope his reign won’t be as dry as dust as his son’s is likely to be and I’ll have something slightly interesting to watch in Royal news after Her Majesty pops her clogs.
Oh and the Vanity Fair article forgot to point out that nothing says “Welcome to the Family” to a black woman like an old aunty greeting you with a Blackamoor brooch. That pretty much set the tone for what Meghan was going to be dealing with.
I did check out Kate and William’s wedding just to get a baseline for comparison to see if the facial expressions at the Sussex wedding really were that unusual. There definitely was a different level of consideration accorded. But damn, how did they manage to stay awake? I know the were going for dignified but I think they actually attained “mummified.”
All of this makes me remember Dickens’ Tale of Two Cities, how he described an English law firm, and how this reflected English tastes and ideals of ‘respectability’- deliberately gloomy, stale, dusty, and most importantly, deadly dull. Interesting, the passage of time, isn’t it?
I think that Harry and Meghan watched the wedding video later, saw how shittily his relatives acted, and that’s when things got bad. I can imagine Harry calling out the family for their rude behavior and them getting all huffy and puffy and haughty and showing their asses. He probably had reservations beforehand about how they were treating Meghan and his relationship with her, but maybe didn’t have any concrete evidence because this is a family that will be nice and polite to your face and then turn around and immediately bad mouth you to others. That wedding video would be the absolute epitome of all their bad behavior and emotionally stunted racist/classist/xenophobic rot coming to the surface in a way that he and Meghan could actually watch. He may have referenced their behavior at the wedding when he had a conversation with them about not accepting Meghan and treating her like a second class citizen within the family. I know I would be pissed to see my entire family disrespecting me and my spouse on the most important, happiest day of our life, especially on international television, and especially when their behavior was meant to humiliate and mock the visiting African American bishop. William and Harry seemed okay at the actual wedding. But afterwards, things went down hill. And it makes sense, Harry and Meghan obviously didn’t watch the wedding like the rest of us did because they were participating in it. But I bet they watched it afterwards And now with all the stories about how there were tensions and problems “around the wedding,” and yet we didn’t see any tense interactions between Harry and his family leading up to or at the wedding At least no face to face issues. They just snickered and acted like a*holes behind his back.
Great catch with that,’around the wedding,’ bit! You make an excellent argument.
I don’t care what kind of cultural window dressing the Windsors did to show they “bent over backwards ” to welcome Meghan. They didn’t go to the mat for her where it really counted.
I also don’t get why these biographers and royal reporters go out of their way to do the BRF’s bidding when in truth they see these people as THE HELP. And SBS didn’t do a good hatchet job on Diana because 20 plus years later the majority of the British people still does not want Camilla as queen consort. Andrew is still getting called out by the FBI.
I can’t wait until CNN puts out their six part special of the Windsors on February 16. The commercials are interesting: there are voiceovers of George VI, the queen, Diana and Harry. None of Charles or William. In one shot in the commercial with pictures of the Cambridges and the Sussexes the Sussex picture was in the foreground and the Cambridge picture is behind theirs, slightly blurred. One can chalk it up for Meghan being an American but I can see Chuck and Bill as taking it as a sleight.
Where I’m sitting the Sussexes are holding the power. The BRF and the press are afraid of them otherwise they would not make such an effort to drag them.
She did her part in diminishing Diana’s struggles though, which is exactly what the RF wanted. The whole attitude that while Charles was bad, Diana was “no saint” in their marriage is super common among a lot of people. Biographers like SBS did a lot to erase some crucial context, specifically surrounding the WAY the RF treated Diana when she got upset about Charles’ behaviour and his treatment of her during their marriage. She expected their support, or at least their compassion, and she got neither. The RF has left so many people out in the cold like this, it’s not even funny.
They bent over backwards to accept Meghan by…inviting a black preacher to give a sermon at her wedding during which multiple members of their family acted like assholes and smirked and scoffed at each other. Right.
This is pretty characteristic of how I’ve seen British society handle discussions surrounding racism and racist behaviour. Their first instinct is to deny it and scoff. “I can’t be racist, I have black friends!” or the ever popular, “The UK MIGHT be a LITTLE racist, but we’re not AS racist as AMERICA. We’re even okay with interracial marriage!” Their next instinct is to get angry, and to accuse you, in turn, of having insulted them by calling out their behaviour and that you’re the one who’s actually the real racist. The knee jerk attitude of white British people especially, that racism might be bad, but accusing white people of being racist is actually far worse, is woefully common and it’s the reason why they’re making absolutely no progress with their bigotry in 2020.
Sally Bedell Smith can go f-ck herself. She’s a crusty old white lady who probably doesn’t moisturize or wear sunscreen. All of these biographers and royal reporters have a keenly vested interest in preserving the RF’s pre-existing attitudes of whiteness and their treatment of POC. They really expect that Meghan should be grateful they did the bare minimum for her. I hope the access that she gets in return for being a kiss ass and furthering the RF’s horrendously abusive behaviour is worth it.
That shrew shouldn’t be knocking the Kardashians, either. Someone else mentioned that the Royals are the ultimate “famous for being famous” family, and at least the Kardashians don’t take money from taxpayers! What “accomplishments” has William made? Or Kate?
I’ll never understand why people insist they’re not celebrities. They are. They’re famous for being a famous, messy ass family. And probably do less work than the kardashians on top of that. The family packaging is just “classier”.
I think everyone is forgetting or chosing to forget or just simply not seeing how SUSSEXIT TAKES AWAY FROM THE PEDOPHILE PRINCE ANDREW. I feel like they actually took one for the team by allowing all of this drama for an off year to work on their marriage and enjoy while taking any all attention away from Prince Andrew’s connections to Epstein and his raping young girls.
Of course they will be back.
The are apart of this drama.
It is all Royal marketing.
And, the Kardashians are everything that is wrong with the world. Everything.
I do agree that that fateful January statement precipitated the Sussexes’ fate, but not to their advantages.
I think Meghan thought: “right, this is 2020, new year, new life I am not putting up with this bullsh*t for a second more, I’m done!”
And off they were.
Things will work out. But being away from the UK and protected from the nasty UK tabloids will not solve all their problems. There is so much they need to do to create their new life.
The Sussexit actually inspired me to exercise patience in my own life.
I’ve had 4 very challenging years and I really want to start a new life as soon as possible. I really though that 2020 would be my fresh start. But I realise that if I transition into this new life gradually this year as opposed to throw my security by the window, I will have an easier time.
Anyway, I eagerly await my next chapter and the Sussexes next chapter too.
Mirage I’m excited for you. Let your next chapter be your best chapter!
Me too Scollins, thank you for your kind encouragement!
“I think Meghan thought: “right, this is 2020, new year, new life I am not putting up with this bullsh*t for a second more, I’m done!” And off they were.”
It’s all on Meghan, right? The transition plan, the timing, the couple’s entire future. G*d forbid her husband (the blood prince) had a major hand in the planning and negotiating with HIS family because he had a vested interest in his family’s welfare, well-being and safety.
I said “Meghan” because I identify to her and I said the same exact thing to myself as 2020 was coming up.
Now I’m sure it was a joint decision.
I have no words left in regards to this family. Of course they will be fine, people will believe any of their lies, nothing will happen to Andrew, he will be back doing public duties soon. The Cambridges will go back to doing the bare minimum and Harry and Meghan will always be seen as the outcasts, the ones who tried to destroy the family, the real wrongdoers.
Another BS piece. I’m surprised they stayed as long as they did. I think one of the reasons Charles is supporting them financially is because he feels guilty. Someone calls your grandson a monkey and you say nothing, you do nothing? On top of all the other crap? I know he loves his son. I just don’t understand him. I’ll concede that everything that’s said about the RF is not necessarily true however there’s plenty of stuff in the public domain regarding H & M’s horrible treatment but the family remained silent.
The establishment wants tea and crumpets for life for allowing Meghan to exist at her own wedding, this piece disgusted me… I didn’t even have to Google Sally Bedell Smith to know she’s white.
That brown dress is not a good choice for Meghan. Its too long.
I think it is far easier for the BRF to blame everything on Meghan than to admit taht Harry has mental illness from the death of his mother at such a young age. I am under the impression that Harry has been looking for help for years and the BRF are all about appearances. I know a lot of people like to blame Meghan to say that she controls him blah blah blah, but Harry has mentioned before his emotional struggles. Diana went thru the same thing. She had emotional challenges and begged for help and they discarded her and mocked her. You would think Charles would have learned from that but sounds like they still want to show a stiff upper lip for the whole family.
One thing has been constant about the coverage of the Sussexes eventual move away from BRF.It is the framing of the story and this article continues in the same vein.
“Meghan is ungrateful, not understanding the ways of her new family nor the expectations of society.”
Prince Harry is defined in the coverage as a weakling, dominated and hood winked by “his wife , a divorcee who earned her own way.” Instead of the reality- he is a devoted husband, respectful of his marriage , a man who treats his wife as an equal and prioritises his family.
The last paragraph was interesting where she (the writer) mentioned Bogart being left in Canada as being “deserted ” rather than being unable to travel because of his advanced age. She claimed that Bogart is 5 years old and is the brother of her son’s dog.
The problem is that Meghan brought that dog from the US and worked in Canada for 7 years. Do the math. Bogart is older than 5 years.
Ms Bedell wants Bogart to return to LA but is it the dog or the “interloper” I.e the Duchess of Sussex she wants to go home ? What about Archie?
Do they want him back sans wife and child ?
What about his courage of conviction?
Prince Harry knows his worth, the BRF is aware of it now and will never admit how weakened it has become with the Sussexes departure.
The best explanation I heard was from the NY Times bureau chief political correspondent, who as a disinterested party likened their departure as that of Brexit with similar results
The same forces that led to Brexit contributed to the Sussexes leaving their positions .
The results in the Brexit vote caused some of the population looked to the monarchy as a sign of their unique European identity, they rejected the Sussexes goaded by the framing of the narrative by the tabloids.
The end result is a weakened UK and a shrinking monarchy.
I agree with some of the posters saying everybody will be just fine. People deals for Harry and Meghan are have already been designed for the way they want to go forward. Harry I can see being into documentaries involving his charities which would be great for him being such amicable person in person. This area suits his personality a lot. Whatever they do it will involve their charities and other topics they have an interest in. This is just my take on it.
PS- That stuff in Vanity Fair is one-sided. There will be pushback some of the things said.
“We let a black person talk at the wedding! So clearly we aren’t the problem.”
Sally Bedell Smith was one of the first to have a go at Diana after she died, diagnosing her with “Borderline Personality Disorder” she should not be commenting on this. She is part of the problem.
This piece, coming from Vanity Fair (American, right?!) and not whatever British rag that is already brimming with all of the current dog-whistle, pearl-rattling Meghan shade, shocks me & makes me feel ragey all over again.
This makes Vanity Fair look bad. I suppose it’s silly of me to be this annoyed because it does still represent a very old-school, “societal elite” (I guess whitely-white, conservative) perspective, but I’ve always enjoyed the writing in it & silly me, figured that as an American publication, wouldn’t necessarily be so buried up the RF’s a***s, or give this much space to the usual hacks from across the pond.
I honestly think one of the reasons the press was so brutal with Meghan was becasue she seemed a very centered person. very strong morals. Ithink at the beginning Meghan largely ignored the press and what negatives they said about her, the press hated being ignored and became more humilitating and vicious in their attacks. I think Kate reads her negative press a lot and keenly changes herself to satisfy their whims whether true to herself or not. Meghan is stronger willed, she can’t be broken I think thats why western woman support her so and men of the east (I’m talking to you piers morgan) don’t.
The Royal Family, especially William and Kate, hate Meghan so much because she hit, in less than a year, a grand slam with her first pitch— The Together Cookbook. And then she followed it up with highly successful tours, SmartWorks, etc. All home runs. She came out in all of this remarkably triumphant. And the victory was global in strength. International media caught on. W&K and the Royal Reporters couldn’ t believe what’s unraveling before their very eyes. No one, especially a black woman, can have this much power over them. They hated her guts. So much so that they had to destroy and break her spirit—- unsuccessfully. They failed to bring her prostrate on the ground in reverence and submission to their will.