Here is our 2020 Oscars Open Post, hosted by Alia Shawkat aka Brad Pitt’s Mysterious Unknown Speechwriter. People didn’t pull Alia’s name out of thin air – Brad and Alia were hanging out together a few times last year, and we were told that they were “friends” or something. Perhaps she was researching his “voice” to better write his awards-season speeches. We do know with relative certainty that Brad isn’t writing his own dang speeches, and Alia is as good a guess as anybody. There’s actually a genuine hope that Brad Pitt gives a shout-out to his speechwriter tonight, when he wins the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor.

Anyway, I have no idea what to expect from this year’s Oscars other than… expect the expected. All four acting categories are almost certainly locks, and the biggest dramas will likely be Best Director and Best Picture. Will Parasite and Bong Joon-ho pull through? Will Academy voters go for a war movie like 1917? Or will they reward a love letter to 1960s Hollywood? We’ll see.

CB and I will be tweeting throughout the red carpet and awards show, and you can follow us here @Celebitchy and here @KaiseratCB. We’ll have full fashion coverage from the Oscars tomorrow, along with an Oscar recap and probably whatever other Oscar dramas come up. Come and join us bright and early!

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red and Backgrid.