Et tu, Brutus? Tom Hanks was pushed under the bus, with both hands, by his oldest child, Colin Hanks, on Sunday, The Ides of March. What started out as a pleasant enough morning, Tom attempted to reassure the world that he was being looked after during his COVID-19 isolation and that we should all do the same for each other with the following post:
Thanks to the Helpers. Let’s take care of ourselves and each other. Hanx pic.twitter.com/09gCdvzGcO
— Tom Hanks (@tomhanks) March 15, 2020
With one photo, concerns for Tom’s health shifted to his heavy-handed Vegemite use. The response was swift, and brutal:
WHERE WERE THESE HELPERS WHEN TOO MUCH VEGEMITE WAS BEING SPREAD ON THAT TOAST?????? https://t.co/cI1ks7EhYa
— Kirsty Webeck 🏳️🌈 (@KirstyWebeck) March 15, 2020
Tom Hanks is going to die from Vegemite isn’t he. https://t.co/s2DCvKoWuy
— Neil McMahon (@NeilMcMahon) March 15, 2020
Right after he took that bite of vegemite with side of toast… pic.twitter.com/eWqRSCFRen
— 🙋🏻♀Ella F. Diaz🇵🇷 (@factspusher) March 15, 2020
It went on and on. Even Gordon Ramsay left a get-well comment but added, “missing a little butter on that Vegemite.” All of a sudden, America’s Dad had besmirched our Vegemite spreading credibility. And just when we thought we lost our Australian allies, Colin stepped in to plunge the final knife in his father’s back:
I've been saying "That's way too much for one piece of toast." to him for years.
— Colin Hanks (@ColinHanks) March 16, 2020
Whereas I could not be happier for this moment of levity during a world crisis, I, too, am an ignorant American when it comes to proper Vegemite application. My sum total experience with the salty spread is the lyric in Men At Work’s Down Under. So I would have slathered it on and lost my standing as well. But, as often happens in these situations, we learn so much from someone else’s crime. Thanks to this handy-dandy How To Eat Vegemite chart, I will never make the mistake Tom did:
Tom. What are you doing? No Australian puts that much vegemite on their toast. pic.twitter.com/bq6m6jY73R
— Julie (@J0Marshll) March 15, 2020
I guess the only thing left to do is wait for Chet Haze’s shirtless response to the tragic Tom/Colin feud.
Photo credit: Getty Images, WENN/Avalon and Twitter
I love love love Colin Hanks. I might have more love for him than his father (but it’s darn close). I will ALWAYS have a giant soft spot for him because of his portrayal of Greg on Life in Pieces. He reminded me so much of my husband – right down to the biking story line.
I have loved Colin ever since his episode on Happy Endings- watch if you’re at home all week, fully recommend.
YES! That is in my top 3 favorite shows. And I believe it’s leaving prime soon (at least in Canada).
It’s on Hulu here in the States, although I’m not embarrassed to admit I own all seasons on DVD. The streaming services need to bring the series back, that would be “ahmahzing”
@ Megs. I own all the seasons as well.
Yay, I’ve got Hulu, going to 👀👀 today.
Thanks!
This still gives me a chuckle.
When I saw Tom Hanks in the headlines again, I thought something serious happen…and it did 😉
My Australian friend sent me that photo of his vegemite and was (light-heartedly) making fun of him for eating it wrong. I have had vegemite once in my life, with her, and didn’t care for it so I honestly didn’t see what he was doing wrong! She showed me a picture of how much to use. Someone needs to show him, poor man. These pictures are funny though. I am super protective of Tom right now. Someone help him out!
As an American who’s lived in Australia for 12 years, take my word for it: any amount of vegemite is too much. Haha.
I’m part Aussie (as in grew up here) and as soon as I saw that pic I thought, “He’s going to regret that,” and “Bet he’s never had Vegemite properly before.” Very sparingly only, and only once in a while for me. A lot of people have it every day though. Mashed anchovies with olive oil (on toast) is a better alternative.
Ideally, you’d slather the heavily buttered, lightly vegemited toast with half an avocado, and you’d have my daily lunch.
yasss!
God, yes. But sub marmite for the vegemite (ducks head…)
LOL. I’ve only learnt about the existance of Vegemite a couple years ago (Argentine here). All I know about is that it’s a very famous Aussie spread. What exactly is it made out of? Is is sweet or salty? How much of it is enough? (EDIT: Nvm. Just saw the How To pic :D)
It was used during the war to keep everybody’s vitamin B levels up. It’s salty, tastes bad on it’s own but useful for a range of things, eg secret ingredient in spaghetti bolognaise. It really is delicious if you know how to use it (ie don’t spread it like Nutella)
So it’s nutritious? I didn’t know that. Maybe I should try it, I’m sure I could use more vitamin B.
I’m pretty sure it’s primary ingredient is Essence of Satan. Sorry Aussie peeps, but that stuff is seriously narsty. And Marmite’s just as bad. Blech.
Same thoughts and I’m not a picky eater I usually will eat anything
I think its main ingredient is a yeast product and, of course, salt. It’s like 25% salt. A lot of Aussies don’t even like it; I think it’s just more infamous than really widely beloved. Asian food is where the Aussie heart really is. Italian and Chinese cuisine too, but that’s more the backdrop as it’s so widely assimilated. On a daily basis, Aussies love their Vietnamese, Thai, Malaysian, Singaporean, Indonesian, Japanese, and Hong Kong (dim sum / yum cha) food above all.
YAs an aussie when I saw the Tom Hanks pic I immediately pulled a face as there was way to much vegemite and no butter! But I love his happy outlook and upbeat about life.
I hate butter so Vegemite (or Marmite as we have it in the UK) is for toast with avocado and lettuce, or just a tiny bit on crackers in the Snowslow household. It’s delicious.
However that amount of it on toast is like eating a spoonful of salt!…
Hot toast, a ton of butter, a little bit of Vegemite. It ain’t jam!
Know I’m late to the Vegemite party on here but I call mine the Fred and Mary – the only way is light to medium toasted wholemeal, sourdough or grain bread – and then spread on and eat while hot! – a tonne of Lurpak butter – about 1cm thick and very very light spread of Vegemite – the melted butter has to be oozing through… much more butter than vegemite.
I love Colin, that was great.
I saw that Tom and Rite were both released from the hospital and will be continuing to self quarantine. Glad they are both doing OK.
Thanks for the laugh along with the vegemite instruction, Hecate. Like you, I only know of it through the song by the Men Down Under. Hope you feel better soon.
I ate vegemite (medium spread) on toast with avocado, tomato and cheese every day for a month and it was lovely 💕
So smoked salmon and capers is okay salty. Heavy-handed vegemite spread is not.
Team Colin! lol
I don’t even put that much jam on my toast. 🤢 You can’t taste anything else.
When I was pregnant I had morning sickness all day every day both pregnancies. All I could stomach for most of the day was vegemite on toast. When both of them were old enough I gave them vegemite on toast for breakfast. The first mouthful I am sure I saw recognition on their faces. To this day we all still have vegemite on toast for breakfast. The correct mixture of butter and vegemite though. Lol
Vegemite just went up in stock, because I didn’t even know what it was until today. Now I have to try it. This was a welcome laugh from all of the seriousness going on.