Last week we covered the story about YouTube celebrities Myka and James Stauffer and how they “rehomed” their four-year-old son Huxley. They adopted Huxley from China three years ago, and Huxley apparently has developmental disabilities, and he’s on the autism spectrum. Myka and James made a YouTube video announcing that they “rehomed” Huxley with another family, like this child was an inconvenient pet. I spent about five minutes on their Instagram and YouTube channel and I’m pretty convinced that they only adopted Huxley for appearances, to “look good” for their inspo-mommy life, and then they gave up on him when it got too hard. Anyway, the Stauffers are still facing a huge amount of well-deserved backlash. Myka provided an update in the comment section of the YouTube video:
The 32-year-old YouTuber and mom to five other children responded to a comment in the family update video about why she and husband James chose to rehome him.
“We would never just give up a child with special needs, this is a personal matter to Hux it had nothing to do with he just had Autism,” she defended. “Multiple scary things happened inside the home towards our other children, and if these events happened with one of my biological kids, after all the help and after the behaviors we witnessed sadly we would have no other choice then to seek help and get their needs met.”
Myka went on, explaining that “Huxley wanted” the rehoming “100% we saw that in family time with other poeple [sic], he constantly chose them and signed with and showed tons of emotion to show us and let us know he wanted this….Huxley never had a say in his adoption, and he needed more help and also wanted this and we know that 100%.”
Let’s just get this straight: now she’s saying that “scary things” happened in the home and she and her husband couldn’t handle it – and we’re supposed to believe that a 4-year-old with autism was instigating things, vaguely – and we’re also supposed to believe that Huxley has the agency to communicate with the only parents he’s ever known to say/show that he wants to live somewhere else? Something in the milk ain’t clean. And then the Stauffers’ lawyers got involved and they made a statement to People Magazine:
The couple’s lawyers tell PEOPLE that the decision was an incredibly difficult one and was made “to provide Huxley with the best possible treatment and care.”
“We are privy to this case and given the facts at hand, we feel this was the best decision for Huxley,” Myka and James’ lawyers, Thomas Taneff and Taylor Sayers, tell PEOPLE in an exclusive statement. “In coming to know our clients we know they are a loving family and are very caring parents that would do anything for their children. Since his adoption, they consulted with multiple professionals in the healthcare and educational arenas in order to provide Huxley with the best possible treatment and care. Over time, the team of medical professionals advised our clients it might be best for Huxley to be placed with another family.”
“This is devastating news for any parent. Our clients came to the difficult determination to follow the advice of the medical professionals. To be clear this did NOT include any considerations for placement in the foster system, but rather to hand-select a family who is equipped to handle Huxley’s needs. They were forced to make a difficult decision, but it is in fact, the right and loving thing to do for this child.”
“We have advised our clients not to say anything further at this time, but it is likely they will share more when the time is appropriate for them and all involved,” the attorneys’ statement says. “We should be clear that Huxley is a 4-year-old child whose privacy should be fully respected. We know our clients would ask for your prayers and support and to respect their privacy with what has been the most difficult decision of their lives.”
Huxley’s privacy should be respected. His privacy should have been respected years ago, when he was used as a prop to help make Myka and James YouTube-famous. And I don’t understand what those medical professionals saw which led everyone to believe that James and Myka were incapable of caring for Huxley but were perfectly capable of caring for their other four (white) children? I mean… WTF? Buzzfeed also had an interesting piece about how f–king shady it is that this was handled privately, and all of the weirdness around the “rehoming” language.
Garbage people. When my son was 4 he wanted to go live with other people. I found it very interesting that if this was the situation with their bio kids “if these events happened with one of my biological kids, after all the help and after the behaviors we witnessed sadly we would have no other choice then to seek help and get their needs met.”
So they’d pull out all the stops for the bio kid but not the one they adopted and didn’t fit into the inspo mommy life (couldn’t monetize him)? No mention of “lovingly rehoming” the bio kids.
Again they are garbage.
Wow, I’d actually forgotten about it, but I was exactly the same at around that age! I can remember being so curious about how other families lived, and always so thrilled if my family was invited to have dinner with another family. I can also remember sometimes not wanting to go home at the end of a play date… but of course, I would have been devastated if my parents had taken that to mean I didn’t want to live with them anymore and just up and left me!
100% I mean are you effing kidding me with this? I made too many long comments on this situation on the first post to even muster the energy for this one after this weekends events and everything else. I will continue to call everyone out surrounding this, especially the white Christian defenders of this family. To me, everyone who is fiercely defending these people are doing it because they would do the exact same thing and their defense mechanism is kicking into high gear. This new statement to try and again justify what they did is just digging them deeper into the hole, really showing themselves. It is clear, they are a$$holes.
I know! When you’re a little kid and around pretty much just your family, OF COURSE you are going to be interested in other people, other families, other kids. What kind of nonsense are these people expecting us to believe?!
And I agree that wording makes it sound like for the bio kids they would do EVERYTHING, and for this child…not so much.
I have a 16 year old son on the autism spectrum, although he is very high functioning compared to what I know about this child. I am also a public high school teacher and have worked with many students on the spectrum. What I do know is that while children on the spectrum have unique symptoms & needs, a very common struggle for people on the spectrum is CHANGE and transitions. They tend to be very rigid in their patterns and usually don’t respond well (that’s putting it mildly) to any change to environment & routines. While this child may have expressed a desire to “hang out” at different homes, I feel confident that he would not “request” a permanent change like this. It would be beyond traumatic for any child to be “rehomed.” The trauma is hugely amplified for this child with special needs. Sadly though, it is probably best for him to not live with these garbage people. They adopted him to benefit their brand and it backfired on them. Karma is a real bitch.
I work with kids with special needs, most of them with autism. Best job I have ever had!!! I love those kids fiercely! With that said, if I were to change their bathroom schedule, they would completely lose it! They thrive on consistency so I could not imagine completely changing their home! This breaks my heart for this little boy. They are disgusting human beings and there is nothing they can say to ever justify what they did to him! 😡😡💔
I wonder if the birth of their youngest was too much of a change for him. All the attention probably shifted.
Myka and her husband c crowdsourced Huxley’s adoption from China, and INSISTED on getting a child with special needs. I think she used that child to get Instagram followers and sponsors and once they had both, they sent him packing., It will be interesting to see how she’s going to pay for her $700K home, since neither she or her husband actually work for a living.
He actually details cars and has his own YouTube channel, which I’ll no longer support. (There’s just something so satisfying when you see those carpets come clean. lol)
I hope 2020 brings about the end of Influencer culture. When you live for SM and everything is only for optics, people/pets/etc in your life become commodities to be marketed, branded and monetize. It’s disgusting and it’s a breeding ground for awfulness.
The good news is that it sounds like these two have lost a lot of “sponsorships” (gag, I hate that term). But I agree, “influencer culture” is valid and soulless and pathetic and here’s hoping that after the hell folks have been through we all realize that this phony, consumerist culture needs to become a thing of the past.
I hope so too. I don’t actually believe it will happen, but I hope very much so – esp. family vloggers/Inluencers who are dragging their children into it. The kids have no say in it but are put online for the world to see.
Monetizing your family is disgusting. Punting the special needs kid because it’s hard and you can (adopted) punt him is beyond disgusting.
I hope the days of “influencing”, especially by people with screwed up values like these people, will be over soon.
From your mouth to God’s ears.
Totally agree. And may reality tv be next (same concept, pimping your kids out to voyeurs in exchange for money).
Word.
Instagram is so fake and unhealthy that all I do now is follow foster cats.
I hope they lose all their sponsorship deals.
Can people PLEASE stop talking about this child as if he was a dog. “Rehomed” makes my stomach turn.
yeah. and the term is trying to disguise what they are actually doing.
those people gave a kid away. who does that? no parent in their right mind gives a child away. if the kid’s unhappy, the parent makes an effort to change that. if the kid’s having problems, the parents make it easier for him. this situation makes no sense at all.
Abandoned. They abandoned their child.
Legally it’s probably referred to as surrendered.
But I concur, when they use language like “rehome” it signals that they thought of and treated this toddler like a pet, not a child.
Horrifying.
Exactly! And for all things holy, will these awful people stop blaming that sweet baby for their disgusting behavior/choices. He’s a baby!
They need all their children to be “rehomed.”
A-freaking-men!
A 4-year old wanted to be rehomed? does the 4 year old even know what that means?
Are they f*** kidding?
Right, my 5 year old will say that he wants to live with his grandparents because I won’t let him have candy for breakfast. Never and I taking that as for real and starting the paperwork like these two. They are just nasty and all for attention. Hoping that he gets the love that he should have gotten all along.
If an autistic four-year old who signs has the clarity to communicate “GET ME THE F OUT OF THIS FAMILY” then authorities should be seriously looking into that home and what’s going on with the other kids.
Very well put @sassafras.
this says it all “100% we saw that in family time with other poeple [sic], he constantly chose them”
she thinks that makes them look good and righteous when, in fact, it makes it very much look like the child knew they rejected him/treated him differently/didn’t want him and that he didn’t trust them or feel safe/loved/secure with them
She might have sought expert help if her biological children needed it, but I highly doubt she’d rehome them like a pet. She obviously didn’t treat Huxley as if he were her own, but more of an experiment and PR opportunity.
“They” not just “She”………the husband is also part of it
true!
Did you see the way she called her children her “biological” children, making the distinction that Huxley was adopted. F that noise. I’m adopted, never has my MOTHER called me her “adoptive” child. I’m her child, plain and simple. They are garbage.
Word.
THIS all day long.
Yeah sure. If that’s true, it’s probably because he wasn’t feeling loved. But why would he when these two wanted him gone.
With the way these two idiots are behaving, I’ve no doubt poor Huxley latched on to another family and preferred them, as they probably treated him better.
The whole thing is gross but hopefully Huxley is better off in the long run…though reading this whole thing is private sounds shady.
They’re gross. Just awful. Made money off of that boy and dropped him like a hot potato.
I want to slap both of them.
The two of them need to save their crocodile tears and quit saying words. They’re both bad people and prime examples of why this era of YouTube-Instagram celebrities/influencers is such a nightmare.
The bottom line is she knowingly adopted a special needs child from a different country to boost her mommy blogger profile and then tossed him when she realized it was going to be harder than she thought. A child isn’t a piece of clothing and it isn’t a pet (it’s bad enough that people treat shelter animals like they’re interchangeable and that there is no negative effect to returning them to a shelter). And now a kid who already had a set of challenges in front of him was torn from the only family he’s known and handed over to strangers without any regard for how it will affect him – I don’t for a second but that he just magically is so much happier without any need for adjustment. And what about her own kids? What were they told? What self serving lies? And what a great lesson to teach young children.
And honestly- the worst part is them trying to passively blame a FOUR YEAR OLD for this. She should be banned from adopting anything for life and someone should take a close look into her biological kids lives to make sure they’re okay as well.
Yes thank you!!! I said this on their last post but even before this new statement the framing was very much blaming the child for this because they did everything possible and tried so hard and he still wouldn’t do what they want him to do waaahhhh!
Their other children are going to need serious therapy. Can you imagine having a younger sibling for several years, and then your parents sending him away? AND blaming him for “wanting” that? AND doing it all so publicly because your parents have sold your private family life for profit?
I truly hope the 4 year old child is in a better and more loving home, and one that will give him TRUE privacy.
More likely their children grow up to become the opposite person of their parents and will demand some answers to them about why their brother was taken away. He was part of that family for a long time.
There’s a photo on her page that says I love this big crazy family, wouldn’t change a thing. Well apparently she would! She’s trash. She should give back all the money she made off that poor kid.
State of Ohio confirmed he’s not in their care-so not through CPS or the foster care system. Which is super shady.
And you know-I get that some kids with ASD can have really challenging behaviors. Sometimes inpatient care is needed. There’s no shame in that. But he’s FOUR and maybe if they hadn’t locked him in closets during meltdowns (which they excused by saying it was a ‘big’ closet) or duct taping his hand to keep him from sucking his thumb and got him PEC system instead of talking to him like a dog they could have resolved a lot of those behaviors.
Long term-he’s better off hopefully. But I watched videos of him laughing and giggling with that entire family and my heart just breaks for him. He’s got to be so confused.
ETA: she says in the video I didn’t start this channel to show a little boy and his struggles, I started this channel to be positive. Says it all right there.
Is the State of Ohio actually going to do anything?
I was a behavioural therapists for ASD kids; it was the most intense and difficult jobs I ever had. We had some kids who would be very aggressive or have very rigid behaviours that we would try to work on to overcome and get them to become more flexible.
Locking them in a cupboard? Duct-taping hands? I just can’t even comprehend.
The behaviours are difficult, but also, all 4 year olds have difficult behaviour. Children don’t come out perfect.
These children are also so, so, so vulnerable. They cannot comprehend the consequences of their actions and act out when they are upset or don’t understand what’s going on.
I just cannot imagine for the life of me as a parent not worrying about how they were doing, what they ate, who they’re with, are they safe?
Right? My four year old twins are crazy and the boy has definitely done some seriously aggressive things a handful of times but he’s four. If I gave away my kids for physically fighting with each other they would all be gone by now. Siblings fight, four year olds have big feelings and don’t yet have the capacity to control or acknowledge them even for a typical four year old. I don’t buy this “multiple scary things happened inside our home towards our other children” and I don’t buy that he’s the only one fighting Or being aggressive toward them. So the other kids are perfectly behaved with each other? BS! Plus instead of saying his siblings they say our other children because he was never viewed as their real sibling and always separate from them.
@Ruby. Past that they said they can’t comment for privacy reason. But at least they said something back to all those people who said ‘not to worry! He’s in foster care!’ Um…No. There’s no oversight.
And I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked our BCBA is this autism or being 3? Because they don’t call it the ‘threenager” stage for no reason.
Duct taping his hand and locking him in a closet? That is abuse. I hope they are being investigated. I wonder how they treat their other children. And I wonder why they would even have been allowed to adopt that child since they have other children. There is so much wrong here.
“To be clear this did NOT include any considerations for placement in the foster system, but rather to hand-select a family who is equipped to handle Huxley’s needs”
The State should ALWAYS have oversight when kids “change hands.” It’s this type of “private arrangement” that allows kids to be trafficked or simply disappear.
this.
Re channel comment. Wow she showed her ass right there. Yeah sure a special needs 4 year old can make informed decisions about his life. Give me a break Me-ka. These deadbeats should also get a real job.
They belong in the oj giaunelli club of denial. I’m sure aunt becky’s daughter will welcome the company
“Multiple scary things happened inside the home towards our other children…” So they are blaming his ‘aggressive behaviour’ and that he’s a threat to the other children.
My little nephew sometimes throws tantrums when his parents collect him from the grandparents’ house because he loves it over there and gets spoilt rotten, but they won’t just let him stay indefinitely. They are physically and legally responsible for him.
And what about the other children? How do they feel about being separated from their sibling?
This is all so disgusting, I’m actually shocked that this can happen in a first world country. Have social services / child welfare gotten involved? Are they looking into this ‘private’ transaction. Will the other family legally adopt him? This is genuinely so concerning; it’s like something out of Black Mirror.
Are there no consequences to their actions?
Yes- such good questions @Ruby_Woo.
I want answers too!
They’re only digging themselves deeper. Just own up to the fact that you couldn’t handle it! Stop trying to justify it! Admit that you took on more responsibility than you could handle. Four year old children do not make major life decisions. Adults make it for them. What a pair of cockwaffles.
All I can think is: Thank GOD that kid is out of there.
Yeah, their treatment of Huxley is a slap to the face of all the parents who struggle day in and say out for years, often decades, to provide for their challenging children.
My son is on the spectrum and when he was about that age he bit my younger son a couple times and it made me really nervous but never did I think his behavior was too hard to deal with or that with some work we couldn’t redirect his impulses. We did.
Huxley is definitely better off without those two as parents. Although it’s sad that he’s losing the only siblings he’s ever known. From the photo, it looks like the sister was protective of him. To say this is all an effed up, collossal mess is an understatement.
Mom to two Autistic people here. We had our fair share of struggle when it came to emotional meltdowns with our children. They had a hard time expressing themselves verbally. I noticed a pattern that when they didn’t have the words, then it would accelerate a meltdown. As soon as we helped them identify their emotions. For example,” you look mad. Is it because of xy and z?” It helped out tremendously. It also helped them start to open up.
I don’t for one minute claim to be an expert on Autism. Once we found out what worked for us, we used it. What we didn’t do is throw in the towel. They didn’t ask for Autism. As parents we knew they had challenges, but if your own family gives up on you, imagine how that would feel? Again I feel such sadness for this little guy. Terrible.
When my youngest was four he said he was leaving our house and walking to see Santa. And what were we, his parents, going to do? Stand in the way of that young man and his very clearly expressed wishes? Absolutely not. If he’s old enough to say something like that he’s old enough to plan, outfit, and complete such an expedition. I told him to write when he got there and let us know he was safe. He hasn’t yet, but that’s on me. He had not learned to read or write yet when he set out.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing this kid is in a new home (taking them at their word that this new home is indeed safer and better able to love this child). I think it’s atrocious that these two will not accept any responsibility for that decision.
your first paragraph made my morning, tbh.
Lol. Your story reminds me of the Calvin and Hobbes cartoon where Calvin wants to try smoking and the parents let him.
This is amazing.
LMAO – thank you for the much needed laugh today!!!
Just a little more background on these people:
(This based on comments and videos i’ve seen, so feel free to correct anything i got wrong)…
1- when they already had 2-3 kids I believe, they asked their followers to help them crowdfund Huxley’s adoption—that should have been the first sign these people should have never been allowed to adopt.
2- THEY ARE LIARS. In the update vid we’ve now come to know, they said they never had any idea Huxley’s problems would be so difficult & that essentially the agency lied to them, YET, there is a video of Myka clearly saying she ignored the doctors involved in the adoption who warned her Huxley’s issues are “severe”—and she said she didn’t care and she was gonna ignore that and keep the adoption going saying, and i quote, “my child is not returnable”—Apparently, he is.
3- There is a video of Myka mocking Huxley having a meltdown. If you watch it you’ll see how cold and uncaring she is towards him. It’s no surprise that after they “rehomed” him, they went on vacation and were nothing but smiles the whole time with their now picture perfect white little family. —these, the people who said they didn’t have the resources for Huxley, went on a vacation after giving him up. It’s no wonder he didn’t feel comfortable around them—that does not mean he chose to freaking be “rehomed”!! Are these people freaking out of their minds!???
Now this is a question, cause I have read the Reuters’ article about the “child exchange” problem in the States (and i’m sure it happens anywhere, but focusing on USA cause that’s where they are)— literally it’s called “private re-homing” —it really, really concerns me that at first they said it was through an agency (and i side-eyed that) but given the terminology they’re using “rehome” “hand-picked” “private” etc…. that’s practically what Reuters details in their the article, and it sounds like “private re-homing” is what they did, they gave away their child in an illegal way. These people need to be investigated right. the. f**k. now.
Wow wow wow.
And I think we all know why they aren’t being investigated.
Good God!!! I just got wind of this story, and recently watched a few minutes of this narcissistic woman’s YouTube content, and I wanted to vomit! They definitely adopted this little boy to “look good” and then when things got real and were not “picture perfect”, they gave up on him – a child who apparently has attachment issues and autism. Yeah, good move UGH! Some people just should not be parents IMO, these are two of them! They should be investigated, but rich white privilege ….. My thoughts and prayers go out to that little boy, who will hopefully find a better home than he had with these two selfish a**holes!
They need to be investigated. There is probably enough proof of child abuse (duct taping the boy’s hand together and locking him in a closet). But I posted above that I have serious concerns about “giving” a child away to another person without state oversight – that’s how kids get trafficked and disappear.
I also know why they won’t be investigated. Because they’re white and claim to be “christian” (and for a large segment of Americans, “christian” is code for white anyway).
@Mrs.Krabapple
100% agree unfortunately 😔
Anyone in the states know who we can report these people too? Apparently not CPS, but anyone else for what could very well be child-trafficking or child-exchange? (I don’t know the correct legal term that would be used if they are guilty of this).
So many “what the fucks” for this bullshit. There is just NO EXCUSE. None. Zero! Nothing can justify this choice.
Let’s be real: the kid is probably better off far from these sociopaths. It’s better to be “rehomed” than to grow up unwanted, to parents who clearly favour their biological children.
That being said, I hope these monsters loose their sponsors and their 200K followers.
I hope the new family is a good family. This is frightening… and how many children has this happened to?
@M there’s no guarantee that this child is better off at wherever he was rehomed to.
He could have been trafficked for all we know, or exchanged for money, or simply left in the woods. Since it’s a “private” exchange (which should be illegal) we’ll never know.
CPS needs to step in and investigate her and her husband. Not only is the way the way they treated that little boy vile, the fact that they just gave him away to another family is horrifying. They are not qualified to do the examinations needed to ensure that the new family and home are safe and right for Huxley.
They better be losing every sponsorship they have.
“I don’t owe you an explanation, but I want to give you one…” Wow, the sense of entitlement in some people is really something!
Yes, bitch, you do own an explanation. Taking other people’s money, taking a vulnerable baby from another country with special needs and just sending him off when you can’t cope.
And the audacity to pretend to cry – the audacity!
Honestly, I was neither shocked nor surprised by this story when it first broke. People in the western world, and most especially white folks, have been doing this form of ‘legal’ human trafficking for a veeeeerrry long time. They go to third world countries, take children of color from their countries, bring them to wherever, and then “rehome” them to total strangers once they’ve served their purpose. And all the rehoming is done by going to an online website where people “advertise” kids that they want to get rid of or what kind of kid they need to obtain. All transactions happen online and then people give away the child to total strangers that the adoptive family or the adopted kid doesn’t know or has never met. Kids disappear and noone knows what happens to them because there’s no accountability for anybody. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying there are no genuine loving families that adopt children and give them loving families, but I’m just saying the cases of people trafficking in POC is getting out of control. A lot of them sell these kids once they have no more use for them. In many cases, these children have been abused and traumatized by their adoptive families too. I encourage you to read the story of Moses Gilbert, it’s a eye opener. Governments need to step in and ban this rehoming thing. If people don’t want these kids, don’t adopt them. There are tons of kids in yr foster systems that need adoption, adopt from yr own country, where child services can HOPEFULLY regulate and follow up on the child.
I had no idea this was so prevalent. I’ve heard about child trafficking in developing countries by gangs, where its more obvious and the children and families are very poor. But this kind of overseas ‘adoption’ just to pass them on – it’s chilling!
There are quite a few countries that have banned adoptions because of these reasons. There are many cases where children are taken from their families with promises of them being given”better lives”. I tell you, this legalized child trafficking is very heart breaking. It is just now coming to light because these YouTubers posted it. And in a lot of these rehoming cases, the child trafficker/adoptive parent tells tall stories about how the child tried to kill or harm the biological children blah blah blah.
It’s incredibly prevalent. So prevalent in fact that Madonna herself did it.
SO does that mean these assh*les took payment for “re-homing” Hux????
How the fuck are these people not under investigation????? They gave away a whole ass child after he was too much work-what do they do to the children they CAN’T give away???? I’m glad he’s away from that terrible family, I just hope he didn’t land somewhere worse because the whole thing is shady as hell. I don’t even want to know what she was googling to come upon someplace to do a “child exchange”….
lololol “whole ass child”
I mean this whole thing breaks my heart but that did make me laugh.
I’m glad Huxley is no longer in this home as he was not receiving love or proper care from these monsters.
Garbage people. Any corporation (or hell, person) who supports them one bit should be called out and shamed. They didn’t “rehome”, they abandoned their child. There are families whose children need huge care and require residential care….and the families stay in as close contact as they are able. They abandoned their child and are bad parents. End of.
This is getting worse. I wonder if Hux’s new family will make a statement?
Boycott any company that throws money at these garbage people.
Mind boggling.
many companies have already cut ties with them. Playtex Baby, Danimals, Suave, Chili’s, and Big Lots, Kate Hudson’s Fabletics, just to name a few.
I am raising a child on the spectrum and the ages of 3-4 were the absolute worst and tons of scary/bad things happened. It was a very dark time for our family because we didn’t know how to help my son and it really affected the whole family. My spouse and I even had the discussion about what we would do if things got worse and he got older and stronger to protect the safety of our other child. It killed me to ever consider putting him into someone else’s care and knowing it could come to that was the worst. We got the right kind of help and things are way better, nowhere near perfect and things change all the time but we are a family. This couple doesn’t want to put in the work, and it’s their loss. It’s sick that they are treating this child a disposable pet. There is no way in hell that child wanted to go to another home unless the mother manipulated him into saying it.
I’m so conflicted about this.
It’s disgusting that they’ve abandoned Huxley. That’s undeniable.
But all this talk about how they should have kept him no matter what makes me uncomfortable. It presumes that they would have magically become the parents that child needed and deserved if they had been forced to keep him. Everything about these two people indicates they are not equipped to parent that child.
What is really in his best interests? Being forced to stay in a home where his needs aren’t met and he’s not loved equally to his siblings, and being “parented” by two individuals who will exploit him on socials media with no regard for privacy?
I don’t know what his current family situation is (not should we, because let’s not exploit his privacy further). But I have to believe and hope that it’s infinitely better than the alternative of forcing him to stay with a family that doesn’t want him and has no capability of giving him the love, care, attention he needs.
I believe the Stauffers should remain financially responsible for him though. Because while I’m glad he’s no longer their child, they shouldn’t just be able to walk away. Plus $$ is their motivator, so it’s a fitting “punishment” to them that doesn’t harm the child’s development.
I agree that it’s obvious that he should not be with those awful people because he deserves better but we don’t know if he’s in a better home now. She’s a liar and there is a post above that calls out some of her lies and shadiness about him. So why should we trust that he’s in a better home.
I also think they should be dragged to hell and back for the situation that they put him in, a four year old boy. They should be dragged for adopting a child to monetize him, get head pats and feel like white saviors because they knew exactly what they were doing. They should be dragged for essentially trying to place the blame on him and his behaviors for the outcome, again, he’s four. They should be dragged for trying to get everyone to feel sorry for THEM.
We can hope he’s in a better home and try and feel good about that but these people do not deserve sympathy or the benefit of the doubt because everything that they’ve shown us says that they are truly awful.
At least one of those children is well under the age of 4, so if they were having difficulty with Huxley, why on earth would they think it would be even easier to care for him and his siblings by having another baby? If the responsibility of caring for your (four) children is already too much to handle, adding a newborn isn’t going to help. If this is their attitude towards him (just “rehome” him like he’s a dog), no wonder he felt more comfortable around other people!
Totally! Of course adding to your family is not going to give you more time to care for your already high-needs child.
They’re selling a story to their viewers. The story has to keep having new plot points come up, or their viewers will lose interest. The adoption and then the next pregnancy/birth were plot points for their viewers to enjoy.
They disgust me. They have plenty of money and could have gotten him a nanny or special services/therapies. I bet they wouldn’t have rehomed one of their biological children!
Do they have actual jobs ?
They got Huxley purely for subscriber boosts & viewership on their YouTube channel. Before they went on to discuss the idea of adoption they had less than 5,000 subscribers, once their “adoption journey” broke their subs & views skyrocketed. They disclosed ALL of Huxley’s medical information on YT before they even met him, had him, or adopted him. She said in a video she was TOLD by doctors he will have a lot of problems are you sure this is what you want & she said she didn’t care she wanted him & she would NEVER give him up. They didn’t give that poor baby a shred of privacy from day 1. Bc of Huxley not only did their YT channel blow up but sponsors started rolling in. The cash started flowing & they upgraded their lives 10 fold. But complained about how much his therapy would cost (all the while flaunting a $6300 cartier watch). These people were NEVER in it for the love of Huxley or the real want to adopt, it was purely for fame & money plain & simple. They used this child to upgrade their YT careers & lives then discarded him when he no longer served their purpose, they got what they wanted. These people are fake & evil & I only feel bad for the kids they’re currently raising
1000% this.
After seeing some other YouTube families in the news over the last couple of years I feel like most of them who so gleefully put their lives and families on display are money hungry narcissistic sociopaths.
The really cynical part of me wonders if they weren’t hoping that he’d turn out to have a terminal brain tumour or similar, so they could document how brave and strong they were through his illness (and crowdfund for holidays and visits to Disneyworld and the like). I know that’s an awful thing to think but I swear these people seem both that deluded in their white saviour-ness and that calculating.
@Waitwhat?
Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past them. And that’s scary.
Omg I hate these people.
Hard to believe they already had children. My 4yr old always wants to go live with someone else (my sister, her friend’s parents, some people we meet on the road) because she thinks they will let her watch more TV lol. Lately she wants us to buy her a mobile home so she can live on her own and not with us her horrible parents who never let her do anything.
So yeah, that’s 4yr olds.
@Trillion – Your statement brings back such vivid memories for me. You sound like very good “horrible parents who never let her do anything,” because that’’s a normal reaction a four y.o. would have at that magical (challenging) age. It’s all a part of her beginning to learn how to figure out the world around her and develop critical thinking skills.
These terrible YouTubers may have impacted their other children’s emotional development due to their decision to give their brother away. I am not a doctor, but I doubt they are able to compartmentalize how Huxley was treated and how their parents may treat them for similar behaviors. They must be so confused.
@ojulia123 – Ugh, i apologize. I just read your comment below mine right after posting this. Great minds think alike?
Imagine how unsafe you would feel being one of the other kids? Mommy and daddy’s love is *not* unconditional. If you become too challenging, they’re going to have you sent away forever – just like they did with your brother.
I can’t imagine the trauma and abandonment issues (times two!) that this child will deal with the rest of his life. He seems like he was the sweetest little boy and needed EXTRA love and attention, not to be “rehomed.”
I’m aware that sometimes, adoptions don’t work out for certain families and children. That’s sad, but I get it. However, they had this child in their home and in their lives, in their children’s lives, for nearly three years. He should’ve fully, completely been part of their family by this point. Yes, caring for children with autism is a unique kind of difficulty. But these people have money and resources. They could’ve hired a caregiver that specifically spent time with him and helped them understand his needs. They could’ve gotten him the best therapy out there (they complained about the price and opted for something cheaper, btw). They could’ve, as a last resort, put him in some sort of outpatient or inpatient facility where they could better address his needs. But to completely wipe their hands of him, give up, and not even take responsibility for their failings? It’s outrageous and disgusting. To him they were Mom and Dad and they abandoned him.
This shady greedy couple will never be held accountable for their actions. I read that they were told that the kid had a tumor in the brain in the beginning and they went ahead with the adoption asking financial support from their followers with the adoption expenses. It turned our that the child has a severe (???) level of autism and since he couldn’t participate in the family business they had “rehome” him.
They are absolute garbage and deserve all the criticism.
I hope it strikes them where it hurts: financially. Hopefully their celebrity status will be impacted by this and they go away.
These people are just like the Duggar family, which shockingly is releasing another show soon. It seems like audiences really go for freak shows as entertainment, even if child abuse is taking place behind the scenes. It’s awful.
I like how the lawyers’ comments basically translate to, “We told them to ‘shut up, shut up, seriously for once in your lives shut up,’ but our clients are such witless egomaniacs that of course they are going to keep babbling.”
Jesus, hold my earrings. I’m an adoptive mom. I’m also mom to a young adult on the autism spectrum. This is so deeply abhorrent that I barely have words. I am not a violent person, but I will kick their collective asses if I ever cross their path. They are worse than garbage people. That shit is straight up evil. They conspired to destroy a human being by smashing any attachment and familial security that poor boy had to smithereens. No one said parenting was easy, Barbie. And the screenshots of your dead-eyed DH wanting a special needs kid, but one that is really easy, ‘it just looks hard” put both of you in a special circle of hell. Can they be deplatformed for this? /rant…for now.
The sheer number of influencers (and even fancy motivational speaker types) who have adopted children and use their bio / adopted children incessantly to get likes is disgusting to me. It’s got a name in their world: “a baby boom.” They know if someone gets pregnant, they’ll grow their audience. And then they flaunt the perfect family, carefully curated outfits and vacations and meals and whatnot and then get surprised when that audience NOTICES things.
I sort of know one of these families who on the whole are good people – but not what they show on YouTube, of course. And I know their kids have had to lie and fudge to their friends at school about stuff that’s going on at home because it’s not really talked about on YT truthfully. It’s resulted in some good talks with my kids (who are friends with their kids) about how yeah, it would be great to be famous but there’s a lot of mental health issues and deception involved.
@sassafras – You are wise to provide good explanations to your own kids about this. I’m sure you’ve also told them how “fame is fleeting,” because in a couple years their friends’ parents will have stopped putting them through this confusion after their popularity has dwindled. I can’t imagine how destructive being on YT would be for kids in their developmental years. Oh wait – yes, I can totally see it now because we have the Kardashians… but even Kris didn’t start when Kendall and Kylie were babies. Ugh, that’s a whole other story.
These people are garbage. I echo the comments from everybody above. The language they use about “re-homing” is super shady and suspect.
I recently listened to this radio interview about another family’s (possibly) similar experience and it sheds another light on adoption and high-needs children. This isn’t to give the YouTube family a pass as it seems like they wanted this adoption for more likes and sponsorship deals
https://www.cbc.ca/listen/live-radio/1-131-out-in-the-open/clip/15666167-there-was-no-bond-between-us-why-one-woman-put-her-adopted-child-back-up-for-adoption
God these people suck! Did they just adopt a child because it’s “trendy” and then realize he may have some special needs? Clearly they can’t handle the amount of kids they have and for the love of god they need to stop reproducing! Having kids and exploiting them for content is pretty messed up. I hope this little boy is in a much better place.
My stance, don’t do anything to an adopted child you would’t do to a bio child that you have in your home. If they want me to believe they did this because their 4 year old wanted it, I question their parenting abilities period. This is a situation of shallow people doing a serious thing, and when shit got real they bailed because he’s not one of them. They are not fit to be adoptive parents. This is the one time where I will use the phrase ride or die and it’s when It involves adopting children. I just can’t with them
Maybe he is with Andy Cohen’s dog.,
I have so many conflicting feelings. I mean clearly they are garbage human beings who tried to monetize a special needs child to embiggen their own profiles. But, they obviously saw him as an “adopted child” and weren’t willing to put in the work. And based on what I have read about how they dealt with his behavioral issues they clearly weren’t doing him any favors. So, in the long run would it be in his best interest to stay with these people and spend the rest of his life being the “adopted problem child” because they are his family, or is it better if he goes somewhere he has parents who hopefully refer to him as their child, and actually put the work in?
I’m going to play devils advocate and suggest maybe it’s better that they give him up now while he’s still young and hopefully can still transition into a new family instead of them hanging onto him for a decade of emotional abuse and psychological damage when they ultimately get rid of him once he’s a teenager because again they just can’t deal with their “adopted child”.
Hopefully this new family is as good as they have been made out to be. Hopefully they are in it for life, and not just for “likes”.
This situation is just so heartbreaking and wherever Huxley is, I really hope his new family is giving him the love, support, comfort, and most of all STABILITY he needs. As I commented on the last post, I was familiar with the Stauffers and their adoption journey with Huxley when the news broke. I always side eyed them filming Huxley, especially when it became apparent he had a lot of special needs. I know Myka is getting the brunt of the criticism but her husband James is equally to blame. While I understand only a tiny fraction of Huxley’s life was showed on camera, there were so many videos of James holding Huxley and they appeared to be very bonded. It was definitely Myka who struggled to connect with Huxley, he always seemed to seek out her husband more than her and I’m sure that was tough. But I really didn’t understand their choice to have another baby when it was clear Huxley was struggling so much. It was a huge red flag to me.
Huxley’s privacy should definitely be respected first and foremost but I’m hoping we get an update after some time passes on how he is doing from his new family (not the Stauffers, I don’t trust what they have to say in regards to Huxley). And hopefully his new family stays away from Youtube and social media and hopefully it works out with them.
As a mother of two autistic kids : Myka and James F*ck you both
They seem narcissistic. I wonder where Huxley really is. Like others have said this needs to be investigated.
These people talk about their child as if he was a dog( I would not treat my dog like this to be clear) but the the use of the word rehoming is disgusting. My mother worked with autistic children for years and I actually don’t temember any 4 year olds making a choice to do most things and certainly not to live with other parents. With full autism many of these kids did not talk at all despite the fact they were very intelligent.If you have teenagers even at 14 they will say they want to live with better parents because you wont let them do something they want to and dont recall anyone rehomig them It may sound harsh but I wonder if their other kids would be better off with other parents as well.
After reading the comments which provide more details about the situation, I just think that transracial adoptions should be outright discouraged.
The adoption industry in the US is controlled by racist white evangelical Christians. We have a judicial system that is so quick to strip the parental rights away from black and other parents of color while ignoring abuse of black and other non-white children in white Christian homes. I know Huxley was adopted from another country but the context of the criminal justice system still applies. The Stauffers should at the very least be investigated and yet: nothing.
What they did—are doing—is violent, traumatizing. That they have not yet been investigated, that they are allowed to have children in their home is more proof of how white supremacy functions.
I am so appalled by this story.
I really just hope Huxley is in a better home. A home that will love him unconditionally and provide him with a wonderful and stable life.
I also feel for the other kids. All of the sudden your brother is just sent away. Thats so confusing and hard for them to understand.
I just can’t imagine going through and adopting a child if I was not 110% committed to caring for them like they were your own flesh and blood. I really can’t imagine what is would be like to care for an adopted special needs child, it is probably incredibly difficult at times. I just have a hard time imagining having a child for 3 years and being able to give him up, or “re-home him” like he is a dog. I really just hope he is okay.
I know a family who did this. They were the perfect family. MIT educated, so calm, so happy. Then they adopted a boy from Russia as their third child. He had problems. They ended up “rehoming” him and went on their lives as if the whole thing never happened. The mask was off – in order to be perfect, their adopted child had to be perfect too and since he had challenges, it was easier to get rid of him and resume being perfect. Horrible.
exactly! there are other options (Kennedy Krieger institute affiliated with John’s Hopkins comes to mind for incredibly challenging cases – I knew several families working in behavior who benefitted greatly from them) and with their resources they surely would have had access to higher levels of care, intensive OT/PT, they could have really done a lot of good demonstrating sensory items….i cannot believe they really exhausted options, if only because there could have been a great promo opportunity for some of these things at the very least.
I am a special needs mom. I have a 6 yo year autistic son, also with ADHD. I also have a “neurotypical” 3.5 year old (but I wouldn’t be surprised if he has ADHD too). I have had many days where I sat and just cried, not knowing what to do, how to make it. And I don’t just mean emotionally – I mean physical exhaustion, having gotten physically hurt caring for my son, having no idea how to keep an eloping toddler/preschooler safe while I had a baby. So many days I’ve thought “how can I keep them alive? Safe?” because the struggle can be that real. I have thoughts at times that I wish I could just vanish – not run away, not give up my kids, but STRAIGHT UP CEASE TO EXIST. Because it felt impossible, and overwhelming, and never ending…. But never once have I thought of giving my kids up, except for when I was so depressed with post partum that I was convinced I was an incompetent mother (like that I was unfit to be a parent, it was a lie I really believed in my post partum state). I am sick over this story. People act all the time like my kid isn’t a person, like he doesn’t understand or process things, and it’s not true (which is so weird, because you wouldn’t even know my son is autistic if you met him, but then once people know it’s like something shifts in them). My ONLY HOPE from this is that it shines a light on the hard work and need for resources for special needs families who are NOT GIVING UP. I’ve been judged by other families for having therapists or home assistance day after day, but it’s not because I’m eating chocolate while nannies watch my kids. It’s to keep my kids safe and healthy and our family stable.
I have a sick feeling something really tragic happened here.
I feel so sad for this child, but also for the biologically-born children of these idiots. They will be so messed up from gaining and then losing a brother. Those kids are stuck with them, posing and preening every time mom and dad want to make money off their cuteness. What happens when puberty starts and they have a house full of gangly, awkward, pimply, frustrated teens who start to realize they can refuse to cooperate? They can’t just “fire” all their kids. I hate influencers who make their family their “job.” Having kids does not make you special, even really cute kids. GET A REAL JOB and respect others’ rights to privacy, assholes.
Yeah, I feel awful for the other kids too. They had a brother, and now they don’t! He’s just…gone. Imagine that happening to your family. It may cause deep trauma if they believe now that mom and dad’s love isn’t unconditional, that they could be abandoned and removed from the family on a whim too. They will be looking for Huxley the rest of their lives.
I’ve been following this story and have so many thoughts on it. None of them are good. The only thing this woman and her husband are committed to is their performance of what they perceive as perfection and the financial windfall it brings them (crowdsourcing the adoption should have been a clue). I was looking through her Instagram account to get a sense of their “brand,” and it appears as though they were vacationing in Bali around when they expunged (I refuse to use their nomenclature) a member of their family. It all just blows my mind and her comments from that trip, “I didn’t know how much I needed this,” only compound the rage I feel. Further, the imagery in the video is also really upsetting: she’s so distraught, but still had time to curl her hair and put on makeup. And they’re both dressed in pure white, like a couple of goddamned “saints”- the colonial overtones are infuriating.
I feel badly that their other children are growing up in a home where their parents teach them that you can monetize yourself, only perfection matters, and that any person– especially ones who don’t look like us or have special needs– are expendable. I don’t doubt the school age kids were reiterating their parents’ language with their peers about the situation.
I still haven’t seen anything anywhere confirming this child is safe and is indeed in a loving home.
We sure the kid is still alive?
Wow. As an educational professional, let me say that I would NEVER, EVER say to a parent’s face that it would be best if their child was not in their home anymore. Have I had parents who I called CPS about? Yes. Have I had students (surprisingly, 4-year olds can cause serious injury) who have caused physical harm to another adult or child? Yes. Have I ever said to the parents of these children that they shouldn’t be their caretakers? No. I don’t know what agencies/doctors/schools they go to, but this does not add up.
I truly hope the sponsors and subscribers that financially support these two people step up and rehome them to the recycle bin.
The more I stay in the company of humans the more I prefer the company of my dog.
It’s time for social media to come down hard on people who are reckless for the sake of likes and followers.
They reaped the rewards of their noteriety even after abandoning a baby who was use to the security of a family.
Not only does he have to deal w the rejection of a family, he’s going to have trust issues with the new one on top of dealing with autism.
These sorry excuse for human beings did more harm than good.
That poor little boy, he didn’t ask to be adopted by a pair of personality disorders. He is truly better off without them, but the trauma they’ve inflicted on him is unforgivable. Recording and posting her mocking him having a meltdown, duct taping his hand but allowing their daughter to suck her thumb at the age of seven, deliberately excluding him from the family unit by putting him to bed, whining about the cost of his speech pathologist whilst wearing a $6k watch, and now throwing him away like a chipped mug that’s not pretty enough for their vapid socials, then going on a month-long holiday in Bali, and months later posting a MONETISED blatantly stage managed waah-waah YouTube about how hard it was for them to fucking ‘rehome’ him.
And that’s only some of the highlights.
I just cannot get my head around the feeling of disgust and revulsion these people provoke in me.