Lily Allen has written some great songs about loser guys. And she’s said some things I think a lot of women think but feel we’re not supposed to say. Like in “Smile,” where she sings, “At first when I see you cry, yeah it makes me smile, yeah it makes my smile.” It’s sort of enjoyable to hear Lily sing about slightly enjoying her ex’s misery. As she says elsewhere in the song, he really messed up her mental health, so why shouldn’t she feel pleased that he’s unhappy now?

But apparently her wide array of “you suck, dude” songs has slightly hampered Lily’s love life. She says she was thinking more about empowering women when she wrote the tunes, but as luck would have it, it’s made men want to steer clear of her in the bedroom for fear they’ll be the topic of her next hit single.

LILY ALLEN reckons men are intimidated by her.

The mouthy singer, who had a number No 1 hit with The Fear, says guys are put off dating her in case she pens a song about their inadequacies.

Her recent hit, Not Fair, was about men who are bad at sex.

In an exclusive interview with Elle magazine, Lily was asked if men were scared of her.

“Yes, they are,” she responded.

“I wish I’d never written Not Fair. You know, the thought honestly – really, honestly – never even occurred to me that it would scare men. I thought it might empower women.

“I thought women would go: ‘Oh God, yes, at last somebody is saying it.’

“I didn’t think it would put me in a position where guys would be like, “Whoa, no, I’m not sleeping with you in case you write something about it!”‘

[From the Sun]

“Not Fair,” by the way, is a really great song. Lily has this fabulous way of being humerous even when she’s disappointed. It makes it more enjoyable, and even relatable. Example:

There’s just one thing that’s getting in the way
When we go up to bed, you’re just no good, it’s such a shame
I look into your eyes, I want to get to know you
And then you make this noise and it’s apparent it’s all over

It’s not fair and I think you’re really mean
I think you’re really mean, I think you’re really mean
Oh, you’re suppose to care
But you never make me scream, you never make me scream

[From Lily Allen’s “Not Fair”]

Before all that, Lily’s singing about how great this guy is and how wonderful and secure he makes her feel. But it’s still not going to work because he sucks in bed. It’s superficial and immature and it’s also something that happens in real life. We all want what we want. And with so many songs criticizing women, I don’t really mind a few that poke fun at men.

All that said, if I were a guy would I want to hop into bed with Lily? Not unless I was very cocky. Yeah I meant that how it sounds. The problem is, I feel like more bad guys think they’re good in bed than good guys think they’re bad. Just like most guys believe they’re good looking, even when that’s a laughable thing to think. Anyway, you’d think Lily would be able to find a few guys up to the challenge. Maybe some sort of sex contract first. Romantic, yes? “Clause a: you do X, Y, and Z and make me A, B, and C. In return, I will do 1, 2, and 3 and not write 4, 5, or 6 about you in any song.” Get a notary up to the hotel room and she’s good to go!

Here’s Lily vacationing with Kate Moss and her daughter Lila Grace in St. Tropez on August 7th. Images thanks to BauerGriffinOnline.