Prince William was the Photoshopped man-child cover of the Sunday Times Magazine this weekend and whew, this thing was a whole mess. The entire Windsor klan’s PR has been obvious, amateurish clownery in the lead up to and wake of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s Oprah interview, but William in particular has been particularly pathetic. The more obvious he becomes, the more I’m convinced that William was the one to comment on what color Harry and Meghan’s children would be and THAT is why the brothers began to fall out. The Sunday Times Magazine does nothing to dispel this – while “The Other Brother” (lol) mentions Harry directly several times, there is no actual contradiction to what Harry and Meghan said in their interview. It largely reads as just pure propaganda, and poorly done propaganda at that. There’s so much in this piece, I’m splitting it up into two posts. Here’s the stuff about Harry and Meghan:

How is Poor Baldy in the wake of the interview? In the immediate aftermath of the interview William was “reeling”, a source close to the duke says. “His head is all over the place on it.” A close friend of both brothers says Harry’s “trapped” comment was “way off the mark”, insisting that William does not see it that way. “He has a path set for him and he’s completely accepting of his role. He is very much his grandmother’s grandson in that respect of duty and service.”

William was part of the post-interview meetings: In the hours and days after the Oprah broadcast, William was at the heart of all discussions with the Queen and the Prince of Wales about how to respond to the Sussexes. He was keen that the issue of race should be acknowledged in the Queen’s statement as an area of particular concern that “will be addressed”

Small-c conservative: William has always railed against being a “ribbon-cutter royal” and the issues he champions — mental health, battling racism in football, homelessness and his ramped-up eco-warrior role — are a window into where the future King William V will take the House of Windsor. A friend says: “He’s a small-c conservative. He values tradition and the need to go around the country, but he realises he can make a difference beyond traditional royal duties.”

The 2017 incident where he missed Commonwealth Day to go skiing: It was the first public nosedive for William, who was still working as an air ambulance pilot. “That pissed him off,” a friend says. “He was leaving home at 5.30am, getting home after dark and saving lives in between, but people were still being critical of his commitment to his [other] job.”

Weird timing for when the Cambridges began full-time work: A former royal aide says: “Immediately after their wedding he had a very clear idea of the pace at which he wanted to take things.” William was adamant he wouldn’t curtail his day jobs, first as an RAF search and rescue helicopter pilot in Anglesey and then with the air ambulance. “If you’re not careful, duty can weigh you down an awful lot at an early age,” he said, insisting he didn’t “lie awake waiting or hoping” to be king. He delayed full-time royal duties until the autumn of 2017, when, acknowledging the Cambridges’ future required more time at “monarchy HQ”, they moved from Norfolk to London and George started school.

Harry was not keen on ‘family hierarchy’: As the brothers clashed more over the substance and style of their work, and the family hierarchy that William is a stickler for but Harry is less keen on, a split was inevitable.

The long walk: The pair went for a long walk to clear the air after the “Sandringham summit” when the Megxit deal was hammered out, but did not part shores as friends. What upset William the most was Harry and Meghan’s surprise launch of their “Sussex Royal” website before the summit, which featured their blueprint wish list of a part-time, commercial royal future…Both “the content and that it’s still online is staggering”, a senior royal source says. “That was it for William, he felt they’d blindsided the Queen in such an insulting and disrespectful way,” says a source close to him, who reveals it was still at the forefront of William’s mind at the Commonwealth Day service one year ago. It was the Sussexes’ final engagement as working royals, and the froideur between them and the rest of the family was unmistakable.

Baldy misses Harry: It is a year since the Sussexes left for California and William misses Harry. “Once he got over the anger of how things happened, he was left with the absence of his brother,” an aide says. “They shared everything about their lives, an office, a foundation, meetings together most days and there was a lot of fun along the way. He’ll miss it for ever.” A close friend says William “definitely feels the pressure now it’s all on him — his future looks different because of his brother’s choices, it’s not easy.” Another friend says: “It’s still raw. He’s very upset by what’s happened, though absolutely intent that he and Harry’s relationship will heal in time.

William got closer to Charles: While a chasm has opened up between the brothers, William has grown closer to the Queen and Prince Charles. He has helped them to navigate their way through Megxit, Prince Andrew’s removal from public life following the Jeffrey Epstein scandal and, now, the Oprah controversy. “That has changed the way the Queen sees him and values his input,” a courtier says. William also feels his relationship with his grandmother has “massively improved” in recent years and their views are “more aligned than ever… Part of William’s evolution is that as he has become closer to his father, he sees their similarities. At William’s wedding there was a gag in one of the speeches that he was more like his father than he’d ever admit, which made a lot of us laugh. As their respective destinies get closer, it weighs more heavily on them and strengthens the bond. The rift with Harry has also brought them closer.

William’s commitment to diversity: William “thinks the public look to him to keep royal work looking modern”, a confidante says. “The Queen and Prince of Wales are providing continuity and stability. He’s carving out his own relationship with diverse communities. He sees it all as a way of doing things now that will help a smooth transition when the time comes.

[From The Sunday Times Magazine]

Throughout the piece, William continuously takes credit for everything under the sun, and the talk of William’s inclusion in all of the palace meetings about Harry & Meghan are some of the most notable examples. William wants credit for saying that the racism issues will be “addressed.” He also wants credit for saying his family isn’t racist, that he single-handedly fixed racism at the BAFTAs, that he’s William the bold small-c conservative who is also a brave pilot and he’s quite mad at Harry so he’s trying to copy everything Harry does. By the way, William is actually a capital-C Conservative. Everyone who works for him is a Tory. And the part about William needing to go skiing on Commonwealth Day because his fake-ass job was so hard? Please. William barely showed up for that job.

“His future looks different because of his brother’s choices, it’s not easy…” Why? Was William planning on blaming Harry for everything bad forever? And of course William is trapped – but Harry was wrong about one thing. William is trapped in a prison almost entirely of his own making. William is too stupid to realize it though. Which is why we’re getting these horrid propaganda pieces. At least the palace propaganda made the effort to make it sound like William isn’t incandescent with rage 24-7.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid.