How many of you knew that Dolly Parton was on Twitter? I didn’t know before today! I could have been following Dolly for months! Damn. Anyway, Dolly’s Twitter feed is pretty f-cking cool, just like the lady herself. Classic tweets, just from the past few days, include such musings as: “Support the Cure. My friends are bowling for boobs tonight in atlanta, strike!” and “Storms make trees take deeper roots.” Unfortunately, most of the tweets seem to be written by her assistant or something, and they revolve around contests and promotional things. Ah, Dolly. Always a businesswoman. So awesome.

So Dolly tweeted yesterday: “Aahhh chiropractor… Hurts so good 🙂 you lug these around and see if your back don’t hurt!” To which I can only say, “God bless you, Dolly.” I’m not alone, either. Jessica Simpson reads Dolly’s Twitter too, and she responded with and “Amen, sister!” Aw… Dolly should take Jessica under her wing.

Funny enough, Us Weekly described this Twitter situation, and then used the article to remind us once again why so many of us call Jessica’s dad “Pervert Joe”:

Jessica Simpson’s breasts have long been the center of attention.

Her father Joe raised eyebrows when he praised her assets in a 2004 GQ interview.

“Jessica never tries to be sexy. She just is sexy. If you put her in a T-shirt or you put her in a bustier, she’s sexy in both,” he said. “She’s got double D’s! You can’t cover those suckers up!”

[From Us Weekly]

That goddamn quote gets me every time. Every time I grimace. Every time I wince. It’s just so disgusting. That quote might get put on Pervert Joe’s gravestone.

And since we’re talking about the Simpson family now, I thought I’d include this little piece about Ashlee. It’s from Fox News 411, and it’s in the same vein as yesterday’s stories about the “real reasons” Ashlee was dumped from Melrose Place. Yesterday’s theories included the “Heather Locklear pushed her off” theory and the “Ashlee sucks at everything” theory. Fox News’ theory is that Ashlee was fired because she was a diva. And because she sucked.

Ashlee Simpson’s diva behavior got her booted from the CW hit ‘Melrose Place’, a source close to one cast member tells Fox411.

“Ashlee was kicked off ‘Melrose Place’ because she was a total diva on set, late all the time, and deeply disliked by fellow cast members,” the insider spills. “It created a lot of discord among the cast.”

Another big problem, says the snitch? “She could barely act.”

(If you saw her episodes, you know this to be true.)

But not being able to act and being a diva hardly set Simpson apart from many of the venerable primetime soap’s stars, both current and past. The insider tells Fox411 it was the producer’s need to bring in one of those past stars that also hastened Simpson’s swan song.

The source says producers desperately wanted Heather Locklear to reprise her role, but couldn’t afford her salary demands without cutting someone.

“They basically trimmed the fat and made it possible for Heather to join the show,” says the snitch. “Heather is a much bigger name than Ashlee.”

[From Fox News 411]

Interesting… I could see it. Ashlee seems like a “everybody treat me like I’m the most special” kind of person. Probably because no one in her family treated her like she was special. Because her pervert father was too busy studying Jessica’s boobs. Cringe.

Here’s Dolly at the Tonys in June. Images thanks to WENN.com . Header is an older photo of Dolly and Jessica together.