We barely cover Riverdale’s Camila Mendes, 28, because she just keeps her head down and does her work. She has over 27 million followers on Instagram – she’s promoting herself, she just isn’t saying or doing controversial sh-t that gets headlines. She has one of those “How I get things done” profiles in The Cut, which I enjoy (although I stopped subscribing to NY Mag after this terrible story). She’s 28 and sounds both self aware and vulnerable about being a working actress and the self doubt that goes along with that. I enjoyed this interview and could relate to some of what she said. Here are highlights, with more at the source:
On establishing a routine within her schedule:
My life goes through very intense phases where I’m either working on a movie or I’m on Riverdale or I’m in L.A., so my routine is constantly changing. But when I’m on a certain project, I’ll establish a routine there. I have to make them up as I go, and as soon as I start getting into a rhythm I have to change it because that project is over or it’s on to the next thing in the next place. If I do have time in the morning to work out, that is something I really like to do — or at least stretch. This sounds so basic, but making my morning latte is how I wake up, and because I actually make it in an espresso machine, it feels like a nice way to get my brain moving. It’s therapeutic, that process, and having that one coffee in peace and quiet before the day gets too crazy.On productivity:
I manage stress through organization. I am most stressed when I feel like everything’s all over the place. I have a crazy Google calendar that’s color-coded, and I’m always using that. The irony is that I’m not great with time management. I’m someone who’s constantly running ten minutes behind, which is something I’ve been fighting my entire life and still haven’t found the solution to.On self-doubt:
This career and this passion of mine means so much to me. So now that I have it, it’s too precious for me to screw up. I’m always like, Okay, what’s the right thing to do at this point in my career? What’s the right next step? Am I taking steps toward where I want to get, and is this going to help me get there? I’m probably more cautious than I should be when it comes to picking projects, but I get very afraid of making the wrong choice and ruining everything. I think super catastrophically, like, I’m going to take one bad project and it’ll be the end of my career and I’ll never work again. I tend to be the most anxious when good things are happening.
Since high school, I’ve tried to be exactly on time to everything. I like being busy and productive, it’s a rush to try to fit more sh-t in a day. This results in me being a couple of minutes late to things usually, which can be stressful, but I have to admit I like that. Camila sounds similar. At least she knows it’s a problem and is addressing it. There’s something boring to me about being early for an appointment. I’m constantly thinking of other things I could be doing instead, which I know is not healthy. I just like staying busy as hell! I get a rush out of it. I also really like what she said about establishing a routine whenever your situation changes, which has served me well throughout my life.
Buzzfeed has a “facts you don’t know about” article for Camila if you’re interested in learning more about her. She graduated from NYU’s Tisch School of The Arts in 2016 and she was massively inspired by Rachel Bilson’s character in The O.C.!
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- HOLLYWOOD, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, USA – SEPTEMBER 14: American actress Camila Mendes wearing Versace arrives at the Los Angeles Special Screening Of Netflix’s ‘Do Revenge’ held at the Netflix Tudum Theater on September 14, 2022 in Hollywood, Los Angeles, California, United States.,Image: 722928155, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: , Model Release: no, Pictured: Camila Mendes, Credit line: Xavier Collin / Image Press Agency / Avalon
photos credit: Phillip Faraone/Netflix, Xavier Collin/Image Press Agency/Avalon
Being constantly late is such a disrespectful, selfish thing to do. You’re literally telling the people waiting on you that their time is less valuable than yours, that you don’t respect their schedule, and that you’re more important than them, so *obvs* you deserve to make your entrance, even though you AGREED to be there at a particular time.
The biggest fight I’ve ever had with anyone in my life was with my sister about her habitual lateness. I started leaving after 5 minutes at every meeting/plan which definitely changed her behaviour but it was just as stressful and even more toxic than just putting up with the lateness in the end.
I’ve grown a lot more patient over time and really try to make it a creative exercise to imagine all the things outside of someone’s locus of control that could have led to them being late and imagine myself in their shoes. We always tend to give ourselves more leeway.
THIS!!! This this this.
We all run late sometimes – but being habitually late isn’t cute or funny or quirky. It’s disrespectful. Especially if you don’t let people know.
I had a friend who regularly left her house when we were supposed to have been at the location. She *knew* she was going to be late, and didn’t let me know before I left my house. I may have had something I could have done, too. We’re not friends anymore.
It truly is my biggest pet peeve.
Totally agree. Fun fact: we planned to meet with Camila for a role a few years ago. She was absolutely late and didn’t apologize. Not impressed by people who preempt introductions by saying they’re always late. It’s just rude.
As someone with ADHD, it always hurts my heart that the first comment on posts like this is “people who are late are selfish jerks!!!” I’m late all the time, but it’s executive dysfunction. My brain doesn’t process time like yours. And it’s not because I don’t care. In fact I’m stressed out of my mind every time I’m running late because I hear people like you screaming, “lateness means you’re a bad person!”
I have ADHD too – But I would rather pluck my eyelashes out than be late. ADHD is no excuse, there are coping strategies available. You either make it a priority to respect other people or you do not.
In the same way that we say Kanye is responsible for this mental illness, we are responsible for functioning with ADHD.
@Colby – thank you for the scolding. I put an incredible amount of energy into dealing with my lateness and have a great toolkit of strategies I use. I usually have things planned to the second (much like Ms Mendes talks about here). Doesn’t work every time. Everyone’s symptoms present differently and time blindness is my biggest issue. The amount of effort I put into addressing it shows how much I care about and respect others’ time. It would be great if anyone else could extend me a modicum of that consideration.
Looseseal 💕 🖖 this hits for me, too.
I really enjoyed Camila in Do Revenge and may have to watch Riverdale now bc she’s fabulous.
Same. I have TERRIBLE time-blindness. I’m getting better at managing it with age, but I don’t think I’ll ever really have it together in this area.
IMO, there is a big difference in someone who is constantly late because they can’t get their shit together, and someone who can’t process time correctly. I’ve dumped boyfriends and friends because they couldn’t get their shit together, but if any of them had mentioned they had a time processing problem, I would have been more easy going about it.
And if someone is 10-15 min late, that’s not a big deal to me. I live in a metropolis, you can’t always time traffic correctly. It’s the 30 minutes and beyond that gets irritating.
@Looseseal – abiding with you! We try SO HARD, but we’re still human.
Or you have ADHD. You’re looking at things from your perspective which isn’t the only one in the world. Most people who are running behind are frazzled and embarrassed, that doesn’t exactly line up with being selfish.
I see this was already addressed by Looseseal, I’m with you, the time blindness is real and super stressful. All my clocks are set ahead, everything is in my phone with advanced warnings. It’s better with meds, but still not perfect. Must be nice to not have to deal with this, but here we are.
Hey, I get that there are exceptions to the rule, but by and large, people who constantly run late do so not because of time blindness or ADHD, but because of a lack of care. The author themself said they just find it “so boring” to get to appointments early or on time. That’s what I was responding to, not every possible attention- or anxiety disorder that could possibly result in running late.
And for the record, even people with ADHD or any other situation is still capable of calling or texting that they’re running behind, rather than leaving people waiting around indefinitely.
@MANGOANGELESQUE – THIS. Again I will say, ADHD is not an excuse to be disrespectful of people’s time. Period.
If it’s not a priority for you, that’s fine! But if it is, you can get better at being on time and/or letting people know when you’re running late.
This. I am always at least 15 minutes early, to everything, and I live in Los Angeles so the traffic excuse could always work, but I have never been late anywhere, except for the time an overpass burned down on the route to and from Las Vegas, and I got stuck on a completely shut down interstate. That is the only time in my life I have been late.
Nothing bugs me more than habitually late people. It’s not complicated. Set an alarm for the time you have to be walking out the door and stick to it, religiously. You have no idea how lateness is perceived by the constantly early or on-time. You are immediately broadcasting that you don’t care about other peoples’ time, end of story.
ETA: Of course there are perfectly reasonable reasons for being late, I am speaking to the chronically late.
I am an obsessively punctual person, and used to be angry at the frequently late, until I read up on it. I have a gift they don’t have. I’m very good at feeling time. I usually wonder why my timer hasn’t gone off within about a minute of it doing so. Many, many chronically late people are just very bad at this, thru no fault of of theirs.
Those Riverdale actresses seem like good eggs. She’s spectacularly beautiful!
I just watched her new Netflix film this week which I believe is a Dangerous Liaisons adaption (it pays open homage to Cruel Intentions at least) and it was really cute!
Truffle is very cute but has a serious underbite that does not look healthy. I’m sure she takes care of her pup but does anyone know if this is normal?
Anyway, happy birthday, Truffle!
I understand the view point that being chronically late is exceptionally rude. But living in a house with 3 folks with ADHD has opened my eyes that sometimes people can try their best and still have a very hard time getting out the door. It is so easy to get side tracked.
I also have ADHD. To me it is not acceptable to just say “well I have ADHD so I’m always late! Nothing I can do about it but continue to waste other peoples time!”
There are strategies that you can leverage to help.
Wow, Colby, you sound like a real expert on these “strategies.” Maybe I should put you in touch with my psychiatrist and my occupational therapist and you could teach them how to make me less of a burden to society.
I’m much higher functioning than a lot of people with ADHD, but I still have time blindness. Congratulations to you, Colby, that this isn’t as much of a factor for you. ADHD is not one size fits all, so instead of assuming that everyone is just like you, maybe shoot for some compassion.
@LOOSESEAL – if your therapists can’t offer you strategies to manage ADHD, you need to find new ones.
@COLDBLOODEDJELLYDONUT – I 100% agree ADHD is not one size fits all. But I also think it is just selfish to say “oh well I guess I’ll just always be late!” and blame your disability. If it’s a priority for you to respect peoples time, you will work on it.
@Colby – these “do better” comments are so upsetting. Those of us with neurodivergence are all doing our BEST with the services we can *access* and *afford*, while trying as hard as we can to function under the strain of daily life. I’m glad you have found strategies that work for you, but it’s coming across as quite ableist and classist.
@LUCY – That is not my intention at all. In fact, I no longer go to therapy because I cant afford my therapist of choice – so believe me, I get it. However, there are many online resources – free if you have internet access- that is where I have found a lot of help recently.
If someone is telling me their therapists are unable to provide them with strategies to manage their neurodivergence, I don’t think it’s classist to recommend they find another therapist who can. That is literally a therapists job.
I think nuance also gets lost in the comment boards, Im certainly not trying to be ableist. Our neurodivergency isnt our fault, but it is our responsibility to manage.
@LOOSESEAL – here is a strategy for you: Breaking up a deadline (arriving somewhere on time) into smaller pieces. Having your task broken up into smaller, more immediate, pieces helps people with ADHD achieve the deadline further in the future.
If I am meeting a friend for dinner at 7, I set the following alarms on my phone:
6: get ready
6:30: hair and make up need to be done
6:45: need to leave now
I know you used quotes around the word strategies to devalue it, but they are immensely helpful. I am not being snarky when I say if you do not have therapists who are helping you equip yourself with things like this, you should find someone who will.
@Colby First You can have all the strategies in place, but those strategies still require a lot of cognitive load to maintain, so being a neurodivergent in a neurotypical world is exhausting. It’s not about effort or prioritization. Second, we also tend to suffer from Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria because we’re constantly hearing how bad we’re failing and how easy it should be to fix. Third, your defensiveness looks a lot like masking. Hey, neurotypicals, a look at me and my neurotypical behavior! Masking is the most exhausting part of any neurodivergence. So if you need good recommendations on therapists who can help you with your self compassion, I can make recommendations.
I really appreciate Lucy’s responses to the comments, but I’ll just add that I’ve never used ADHD as an excuse and there are a ton of comments in this thread that demonstrate how horrible the assumptions are for people that struggle with it. I have not been diagnosed myself, but my dependents have been… and each one is in a different path as far as identifying the best strategies for getting out the door in time. Mornings are the absolute hardest because medication hasn’t kicked in and all of the prep work from the night before doesn’t always have the pay off that we hope for. I’m one of those folks that tries so hard to get out the door on time but it rarely happens and I carry a lot of anxiety because of it. Anyway – things aren’t always as simple as “if you made it a priority, you could show up on time”.
Ugh — my Mister is ALWAYS late and it is just because he is puttering or just blowing off time — he will “jump in the shower” 5 minutes before we are supposed to leave . It has gone on so long that if we are meeting friends, I will leave and tell him to meet me there. Sometimes it helps, others not. It’s RUDE.
We are all wired differently and I really struggle with people who are habitually late to things as it’s just not how I operate. In part because I’ve been working for over 20 years and it’s just expected that if you arrange something for a certain time you show up. I’m a consultant these days and if I start showing up late to client meetings I won’t be around for long. If you’ve got too much on, make some changes. I do understand that there are conditions that can impact how we process time and manage ourselves, maybe that’s the case with Camilla, maybe not.
Well, if being late is her worst fault, so be it. There are much worse things to be. She is very cute and I love her dog. I don’t know how you can fix the dog’s underbite? Braces? I’m not kidding. I just spent $3,200 for my dog’s dental procedure and only got half back through pet insurance. If she’d been my daughter, I could have just paid like $120 for a co-pay.
Hate such attitude. Grow up.