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Gabrielle Union made some headlines last month when she appeared on the “Black Millionaires” podcast and shared that she and her husband split their household bills evenly. This was a bit surprising to some, myself included, because Dwyane Wade’s net worth is reportedly four times that of Gabrielle’s — $170 compared to $40 million. Dwyane appeared on yet another podcast, “Club Shay Shay,” and confirmed what Gabrielle said — they do split some costs evenly, such as their home purchase. And he explained why.
Dwyane Wade opened up about how he and Gabrielle Union manage their finances together as a couple.
The 41-year-old professional athlete confirmed that he and his wife split their costs evenly during a recent podcast appearance.
He revealed that they decided to do so after a conversation that they had before buying a home together.
Dwyane broke things down during an appearance on the Club Shay Shay podcast, explaining that the decision came after he made a comment about the house they were living in while in Miami, Florida.
“I said something about it being my house that I paid for. My wife looked at me and said ‘you will never say that to me again when it’s something that we share,’” he recalled. “My wife was like, ‘when we move to L.A., I got half on it. You will never say my house again.’ She said, ‘you can say that in the arena!’”
He added that they pooled their finances together to buy a fantastic house, but that they don’t pay for everything like that.
“We probably share three things in our life that we’re 50/50 on. Everything else, I’m 1,000%, and she’s 1,000%. We decided that certain things in our life we would share in it,” he continued.
Dwyane explained that they also split costs on their shared daughter. However, they each handle the “20 to 50 responsibilities” that they have personally.
“When I say that, that means she has her mother, she has her sisters, she has her dad so she has a lot of things she’s responsible for,” he said. “She pays 100% of that and you know what I do? I pay 100% of my life.”
So Dwyane began the interview by lamenting the think-pieces on “[him] as a man” after Gabrielle’s interview, but then his explanation for why they split stuff made him come off like a jerk. Apparently, in Miami he said something to her about “his house that he bought” and that’s why she insisted they split the purchase cost of their L.A. home. Um, you’re not supposed to pull the “MY house” card when you’re in a marriage. I would love to know the context, but it probably was not said in jest based on Gabrielle’s reaction and insistence on splitting the cost of their next home. I’m pretty stubborn and love making a point, so I get why she did that. I’m kind of surprised — I wouldn’t have guessed him to utter a “my house, my rules” kind of comment, but everyone has their d-ck moments. Anyway, he goes on to explain that there are three costs he and Gabrielle share 50/50, including the house and stuff for their young daughter, and in general they both pick up costs for different things. Dwyane also kept mentioning Gabrielle’s independence and other responsibilities and successful career as a working actress, so at least he’s saying the right things there.
.@DwyaneWade on @itsgabrielleu‘s 50/50 comment:
🎧: https://t.co/dDboeIARV8
📺: https://t.co/zEUh0BRelM pic.twitter.com/CI8isyRHZZ— Club Shay Shay (@ClubShayShay) June 12, 2023
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This isn’t the damage limitation he thinks it is.
Notice however how he references GU taking care of ‘her family’ which I suspect is in direct reference to him taking care of ‘his family’ i.e. his kids with his ex wife and ‘we were on a break baby mama’.
I also think it’s 2023 and couples should do what they want, but common sense should prevail and she shouldn’t feel the need to contribute her half at cost to other life goals.
As an athlete, his earnings may be less in future years. I hope she outearns him by $500 million over the next decade or so and still makes him pay his half.
Everyone has their own version of fairness and independence in a relationship but this doesn’t sound like a partnership.
I say let each couple decide what is best for them. My husband and I split 50/50. I insisted. No one will support me but myself because I’m like that. My husband is frugal, so he loves it.
He seems a little confused.
I think people think about what is fair and automatically associate that with equality when they should instead associate that with equity given that he is worth so much more than her. I get it she wants to be independent and support herself and contribute to the house. Wonderful. That doesn’t mean she should be paying half when he is worth so much more than she is. Fair would have been them both paying a the same percentage of their income toward the house in other words an arrangement based on equity. It would have also been “her house” as well, and she would have been contributing.
It just wouldn’t have been so burdensome to her as opposed to him. Her paying half when he is worth so much more actually puts more of a strain on her. I get that she is “rich” and doesn’t need his money. However the interview she did a couple months ago, made it seem like she has this anxiety about being able to support all the folks she does, and her sentiments about going half while seemingly noble are actually not “fair” in this instance. I wish they both understood this.
@Layday: really great point about equity. +1
He makes it sound like it came up in a discussion/argument about how something got done in the household, and I think it’s weird that rather than him shifting his perspective to see it as their shared home, she just paid for half of a new house.
@Kirsten: I agree, her solution was is a bit extreme. I’m curious, though, if this is the language men understand (much as I hate to even ask that). Like, she might’ve talked until she was blue in the face to try to change his perspective. But only big, bold action would work. And since it could be perceived as a little emasculating (not necessarily the sharing, but the reason behind why she’s doing it), it was enough to stun him into HEARING hearing her.
Kind of like if you really want to zing a man, you make fun of his beard, or his height, or ask if his friends consider him the ‘Kid Brother’ in the friend group, or say he has child-bearing hips. Those things are zings in their language. (Disclaimer: I haven’t said any of these things; just noticed them in comments online getting incels to shut up lol!)
I wish Gabrielle hadn’t revealed this, as it’s garnered them, especially him, a lot of criticism. If it works for them, it does. If they want to re-adjust their financial decisions later on, of course they can.
I am shocked by the negative reaction to this! Shows how far as a society we are from being truly equal. I’ve seen too many black “successful” women with blue ticks on twitter saying they’d never do this and how its toxic alpha female!!!Shish some women just hate seeing other independent strong women. Its sad to see black twitter attacking her labelling her a controlling women for wanting to be seen as equal to her husband. I agree with earlier poster, in coming years Dwyane might probably be earning less than her and this arrangement would still serve both parties as the responsibilities are shared.
Thank you!
My take (FWIW as someone who has been married for 18 years with two kids and completely shared finances since we got engaged and bought our first house, and whose husband outearns her about 5-1) is that she feels like she has to control and put in “her half” because he doesn’t handle their shared responsibilities in a way that makes her feel secure/supported.
I joke that I pay for the groceries and the dog-walker and he covers everything else, and any time I do, my husband is quick to point out that I do a lot more than that. I know that he recognizes the non-monetary contributions I make, and that my doing so allows him to bring home the literal dollars he does. It is a partnership, and we both need and appreciate each other. I think that is what is missing here, and Gabrielle said, “no you won’t.” Because she can.
The only way to avoid someone saying to you it’s mine because I paid for it is to not let them pay for it. I get it.
Am I reading it wrong, or is this a pretty smart way to do it? This is a big shared asset, so they split it 50/50, along with expenses for their daughter. As long as the house was affordable for the person with the lower income, I don’t see that being a big deal, and then their other expenses are separate.
Makes sense to me! I’m sorry to see there is so much push back against something that obviously works for them.
To be clear I don’t see anything wrong with their arrangement. What works for them, works for them. However a 50/50 split isn’t actual equal when that means one partner who makes less has to shoulder a disproportionate financial burden. For example if a husband makes 100K but a wife 50K, while it may seem be easy to say let’s split the mortgage in half 50/50, the wife is going to struggle a whole lot more to pay her share of the mortgage. I have seen men use a 50/50 dynamic to manipulate their women partners to pay half (when these women make way less than their husbands (women still on average make less than men across the board)) and it should be recognized as problematic because it’s exploiting the tenets of feminism without recognizing historical factors that continue to perpetuate gender pay inequality.
Do I think that’s what he is doing? Absolutely not. It was her idea for the 50/50 split. I just want there to be a more holistic understanding of what is actually “fair”.
This makes sense to me.
Our house is in my name, but we split the down payment, and my husband pays the mortgage, taxes, and insurance. However, we split repairs.
I pay for the mobiles and wifi- he pays the utilities. I pay for my gas and minor upkeep on my car- he paid for half of my car and always pays registration and insurance.
We have separate accounts and credit cards (but have access to everything) and insurance through our jobs.
I help my mom and siblings on occasion, he helps his parents and adult daughter occasionally. We split vacations and nights out.
He makes more, I make less.
It’s simple, easy, and more importantly – it works for us.
Good for them for finding the same.
Gab is right to do this and show him he doesn’t own sht, they both do. They’re both rich, so this is not about money, it’s about power.