The Friday before Ayo Edebiri hosted Saturday Night Live, with Jennifer Lopez as musical guest, TMZ unearthed a 2020 podcast interview from Ayo. Ayo appeared on the Scam Goddess pod and named Jennifer’s singing career as one of her favorite “scams.” When I covered the issue, I thought that Ayo likely spoke to J.Lo directly at SNL. Jennifer confirms that’s exactly what happened in a bonkers new Variety cover story. Jen spoke to Variety about her three new projects: the album This Is Me… Now; the musical film This Is Me… Now: A Love Story; and a documentary called The Greatest Love Story Never Told. In case you didn’t realize it, J.Lo has well and truly lost the plot. We were so worried that Ben Affleck was going to f–k up this marriage, but it’s Jennifer. She’s the one going way overboard in an attempt to celebrate her love for her fourth husband. Even Jane Fonda tried to talk her out of it, as did J.Lo’s longtime producing partner. Jennifer even put $20 million of her own money into financing these disasters. Some highlights from Variety:
Bennifer 1.0: “Our relationship crumbled under the weight of the pressure. We lost a sense of ourselves, and we needed to separate because we didn’t know how to survive it. I had to figure myself out, and he had to figure himself out.” The first time Lopez was in love with Affleck, the crush of cameras took him away from her, leading her into multiple baffling relationships. This time, Lopez is turning the tables and seems intent on sharing every shred of their love while Affleck grudgingly follows along. In the documentary, Affleck says, “Things that are private I always felt are sacred and special because, in part, they’re private.” He then delivers an understatement: “So this was something of an adjustment for me.”
The musical film features a Zodiac Love Council: “Everybody thought I was crazy,” she says with a loud laugh. “And by the way, I thought I was crazy.” Joining Jane Fonda and Trevor Noah in a partly animated musical journey through many of the songs on “This Is Me … Now” are Post Malone, Sofia Vergara, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Keke Palmer and a few other famous randos. They’re all on that Zodiac love council examining Lopez’s romantic foibles. There is a special appearance by guru to the stars Sadhguru, which, according to the documentary, added $200,000 to the film’s budget. Affleck plays a wizened TV commentator.
Even Khloe Kardashian wanted no part of this disaster: Khloé Kardashian was among many Hollywood types who declined to appear in the film despite Lopez’s requests. The irony that an icon from the most photographed family didn’t want to appear in her film was not lost on Lopez, who looks downcast in the documentary. “People are scared to put themselves out there,” she says on camera. “I get it. It took me a long time. I’m scared. But I don’t act like I’m scared — that’s the secret to my whole f–king career.”
She needs to do all of this to start the next chapter?? “I’ve been on this journey, and I’ve been trying to figure it out,” she says about her chronic quest for enduring love. ”Now I feel like because Ben and I have rediscovered each other — and now that we’re married — I have something to offer. This is the defining piece of work that’s going to close that chapter so I can move on to the next part of my life.”
She thinks the iconic “Jenny From the Block” video was a mistake. “‘Jenny From the Block’ should have been me back in the Bronx kind of walking around the neighborhood. That’s what that video should have been.” Lawrence, she says, convinced her to ask Affleck to be in the video. “We were so ourselves. And we never thought that people would take offense or be angry at us for kind of living out loud and making a cool video. We were so naive….I don’t regret it. Even though it wound up turning out ugly for us in the media, it was very defining for me in my musical trajectory. Some very beautiful, iconic images came out of that video. It’s the one thing, no matter where I go people still go, ‘Hey, there’s Jenny from the block.’”
On Ayo Edebiri’s scam comments: “She was mortified and very sweet,” says Lopez about talking to Edebiri backstage afterward. ”She came to my dressing room and apologized with tears in her eyes, saying how terrible it was that she had said those things. She felt really badly and loved my performance because we had just done my soundcheck and she actually got to hear me perform. She was just like, ‘I’m so f–king sorry, it was so awful of me.’” Lopez shrugs. “It’s funny. I’ve heard similar things said about me throughout my career, so it really didn’t affect me.”
The Ayo story – I mean, Jennifer was really making sure that everyone knows that Ayo was tearful and apologetic, which is a big choice. But I was on the side of “Ayo should privately apologize” anyway – regardless of your thoughts about J.Lo’s music career, it was a regrettable move for Ayo to trash someone famous, someone she might meet and work with some day. As Tina Fey said to Bowen Yang, “Learn from my mistakes, learn from Ayo. Podcasts are forever. Authenticity is dangerous and expensive.” Talk about celebrities like they’re your future coworkers. Ayo learned that lesson.
As for Jennifer’s whole three-project mess these days… as Variety makes abundantly clear, absolutely no one in Jennifer’s life wanted any part of this. I think she could have gotten away with an album, for sure, and maybe spent some money making some fun music videos. But the musical film PLUS a documentary in which she’s dragging Ben around on camera? Come on. Jane Fonda was right – this is way too much.
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This week's Variety cover story:
Jennifer Lopez’s $20 Million Gamble: Why the Superstar Spent Her Own Money and Defied Skeptics to Tell Her Ben Affleck Love Storyhttps://t.co/f0Fr7YDYDe pic.twitter.com/wKdVz8nWdC
— Variety (@Variety) February 13, 2024
Photos courtesy of Cover Images.
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- Paris Fashion Week Haute Couture Spring/Summer 2024 – Valentino – Arrivals Featuring: Jennifer Lopez Where: Paris, France When: 24 Jan 2024 Credit: Starface Photo/Cover Images **UK AND USA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- Celebrities attending the Valentino Haute Couture Spring/Summer 2024 show as part of Paris Fashion Week in Paris, France Featuring: Jennifer Lopez Where: Paris, France When: 24 Jan 2024 Credit: Aurore Marechal/Abaca Press/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
She still doesn’t know the guy. This is HER love story and she doesn’t even seem interested in really knowing him as a person. He seems to be humoring her for now, but he is going to have a breaking point. They are repeating the first round.
Yeah, I don’t see this marriage lasting. He doesn’t do well with women who are more into him than he is into them. Jlo is just too, too much.
She’s always been in love with love rather than the guy. As long as Ben keeps acting like a character in her fantasies, things will go smoothly.
I enjoy J Lo’s entertainment. Shes a professional. And shes human. I wish her well.
This is exactly what I have been saying too.
They don’t know each other, & a rush marriage to reclaim youth is NOT the way to get to know someone.
They had an affair 20 years ago. They don’t each other as parents, as adults, with their successful careers.
This is a mess, with kids in the mix.
It’s not romantic in the slightest.
I’m not surprised she’s going to these extremes. He’s unavailable. He’s always been emotionally unavailable, to his first wife, to Jen when they dated before, & now this marriage.
He’s an addict. His demons run deep & she can’t save him.
She love bombs, not just the men but herself. She love bombs herself.
@Kokiri, love everything you said here and how you said it! When they got back together, I didn’t see it lasting because she seems SO high maintenance, IMO.
@Kokiri “She love bombs herself” – GOOD EYE. What a concept! Love bombing yourself. You should write a book on it. Or just an article. There is something universal to unfold there, I think.
Wow! Yes! Love bombing yourself…I agree with the book deal!!
Seriously, that’s absolutely what this is!! Something is going wrong so she’s dumping a bunch of money on herself to prove this love story… or something. It’s delusional.
Agree. This is the same kind of stuff that sunk their relationship the first time around and idk how she doesn’t recognize that. I mostly feel bad for her kids.
Why do you feel bad for the kids? They are privileged beyond measure. Plus they are used to their parents in the limelight. At least she is doing something that makes her happy.
Elsa, if this relationship publicly explodes and implodes, it won’t matter how much money you throw at the kids or movie premieres you take them to. It will affect them. Their parents’ divorces affected them, how we don’t know but it for sure did. How their parents and step-parents relationships play out publicly will affect them, even if they all get new Land Rovers on their 16th birthdays.
Elsa sounds like the cop who didn’t take me seriously when I called 911 on my mother for physically abusing me at the age of 12. She said I didn’t know what abuse was because my family had money so my problems weren’t important or as bad as people who weren’t privileged. I guess my mom dragging me around the house by my ponytail and beating me with the metal end of a belt isn’t abuse because my parents had money.
If you look at the lives of celebrities’ children…mostly absentee parents, constantly hounded by paps and speculated on by media and the public, the weird culture that is Hollywood…that’s just the start, and I don’t think bunches of money is enough of an equalizer. If anything it just masks the issues.
I wonder what Elsa says when famous people complete suicide?
This is like watching a slow motion car crash. She learned nothing from the first time.
@Campbell; I said that at the wedding (the most recent wedding). Slow motion car crash. Yup.
Yes, she learned nothing! She says it didn’t work out the first time because they couldn’t handle the pressure. Making 3 separate projects about your rekindled romance isn’t pressure?!?! What could be more pressure than marketing and selling your relationship as the be all and end all fairytale ending? This whole thing is so cringe.
He loves the attention too
LOL, yea I see it but I don’t care. I’ll watch it all haha. Sure it’s over the top but who’s she hurting? She’s been through giant flops before, I kind of admire her being the eternal optimist- “maybe this time will turn out amazing”!
I feel the same way as you. I just cannot bring myself to say anything negative about J.Lo cause I love her.
I’ve spent months rolling my eyes at people that can’t think a bad thing about TSwift and then I typed my insane comment here and hit submit and thought, huh, I guess I’m one too. LOL!
Same!
My colleague was a ‘personal dresser’ at a Madewell store back when it was a go-to shop. JLo came in and my colleague was assigned to her. She said JLo was an absolute byotch who treated my friend like sh*t. Now my colleague is an ultra-successful marketer who loves giving the downlow on JLo.
Her skincare is a scam
@SAS who is she hurting? Well I hope that she’s not hurt by it anymore but the ongoing Jennifer Garner erasure is incredibly disrespectful and heartless. So JLo and Ben are the greatest love story ever? Just forgetting about those 20 (?) or something years with Garner, you know the mother of his children, that for all we know tried really hard to be a good partner, even at his lowest points,
The other thing that I don’t like about this is that she keeps talking about their “love story” like it’s some great accomplishment… mayyybe if a couple has been together for 50 years or something, that’s an accomplishment and I would listen to what advice they have to say, but
They’ve been married for a year now? Wtf
@katinka – well said! And some love story – their first go-round he behaved like a drunken frat boy and cheated on her with strippers after groping a female television host. Great guy /s
I feel a bit sorry for her. She seems so caught up in a fantasy world that isn’t real. That’s not normal.
Herself. She is hurting herself, and she doesn’t even know it. If they broke up the first time because of media pressure (not because Ben is a cheating cheater who didn’t give a shit about her, ahem), then why create all kinds of media about your marriage?!
I mean, those honeymoon shots in Paris, come ON. She’s just chillin’ with him on a dirty bench near the Seine in a luxe dress and white stilettos? No, just no. She’s inviting the media to watch her/their every move. She can’t stand to be deprived of the attention.
Just because someone has children with someone, it doesn’t mean they are The One.
I’m sure Jennifer G. Is just fine not being part of this story.
THIS! Yes. Acting like only crazy circumstance kept them apart and they were destined….LOL. J. Garner is the mother of his children and let’s be honest – THEY are the loves of his life. She supported him through his lowest points and never spoke against him. JLO is so full of herself to think that she is the end all of love for him. I’m sure he loves her and I hope for both their children’s sake that this works or ends amicably but the arrogance. And the story about Ayo is just distasteful. She makes it seem like she was groveling and then heard the VOICE and was changed in her opinion. JLO cannot sing. She is autotuned to all hell. There is confidence and then there is an utter lack of humility and we know which one is “Jenny from the block.”
Well for sure, she’s only going to give the romanticized version of the fairy tale that is in her head and not the truth like she was in love with Casper lol She is going to edit out that Ben cheated on her with strippers while they were engaged and let’s see if her version includes Ben’s nanny he was banging.
Jen would like to think we’re interested in their relationship but really it’s just 2 exes getting back together: it’s not harry and meg’s story. Her stubbornness trying to stuff our throats with her love story is making everybody cringe. Give me a reality show with your real lives – i’ll watch that.
Bennifer is a great love story
@katinka-YES! This is not an epic love story. You want epic love story? See Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward.
@Mika, you’re right, having children with someone does not equal ‘The One’ or being THE love of someone’s life. People would be surprised. And his children are certainly loves of his life, but not in a romantic, life partner kind of way. Why does this upset some people so much? Is it uncomfortable to realize?
And @Kristin, I also love Paul and Joanna’s story, but he did stray AND was married with a kid and cheated on his wife when they met. Definitely an epic romance, but definitely NOT without flaws. Very real. A very human love story most of all. They had the kind of attraction that could also be destructive.
Also, 20 years spend together could mean less to a person than the 6 months they dated the love of their life. It really depends on the kind of love. Love is NOT an exact science. I don’t know if JLo is THE love of his life or what not, but Garner wasn’t either. But they were life partners for a long time and she’s the mother to their children, so she’ll always be there. I hope there’s love there still too, in a friendship kind of way. There seems to be.
I feel the same way you do. Up until this point, it’s been Jen Garner rescuing Ben from himself and the terrible relationships he’s been in. Love the fact Jen Garner is such a great mother and she tried to be a friend to JLo but it didn’t work. Trying to recreate yesterday’s feelings is quite a mountain to climb. I wish them all the very best. This cannot get easier.
It’s actually not so nice for poor Marc Anthony, her own ex and father of her children either. And all those children, hers as well as Bens could be hurt by it also. So who is she hurting? A lot of people.
@MTL.EXPAT I didn’t even think of that but you’re totally right! Truly, a love story for the ages 🙈
Honestly though, I hope those exes and children are ok. When she keeps talking about all of this in a way like her life is FINALLY a dream come true ONLY NOW WITH BEN THE GREAT, she makes it sound like those years and marriages and children before were just unfortunate accidents down the road before everything fell into place. How does she not get that.
@Katinka, of all the celebs to go after for being disrespectful to their exes, JLo must be last on the list- I don’t think she’s on bad terms with any of her exes and seems incredibly close to Jen Garner!
If I’m not wrong Marc Antony married a much younger model, I’m pretty sure he’ll be fine.
I see JLo as out of touch but completely harmless.
@katinka – I always got the creeps about Marc Anthony. And of course he remarried someone half his age… JLo is a savvy businesswoman for sure & hopefully gets joy from her children and friends. Her picker for men has always been faulty!
Ha! Someone should perhaps read up on ‘poor’ Marc Anthony. You’re not up to date. Let’s just say that.
I felt actually pretty endearing about her after reading it. One line stuck out to me. I am always scared but I don’t let people know, that’s how I’ve made it this far. Let her do her vanity project. Who is she hurting?
I couldn’t agree more! Sure this whole project is pretty bonkers but it’s also fully on-brand for her — and I’d bet anything that she didn’t *lose* money when Amazon picked it up.
Also — a Zodiac Love Council with Jane Fonda???? Inject it into my veins, as they say.
I’m not a fan but if she wants to spend her own money and do dopey things, who cares? She’s not hurting anyone , just look away.
SAS I also thought of Taylor Swift but in this way — both she and JLo are examples of how much we love a narrative. They both think they’re living out a love story, so they start performing that story (to our great entertainment, admittedly) to fit a narrative. But reality is always both more complicated and more mundane than a rom com.
If it’s a massive total car crash…. I’ll definitely watch it
I agree with Ayo’s assessment. JLo’s voice is mediocre, as is her acting. The one singing performance of hers other than the Selena movie that I recall being really good was her appearance at the HoF induction ceremony where she sang with inductee LL Cool J. And that is the kind of performance where you need to bring your A+ game.
That was very much Selena’s voice in the film. J Lo could never sing that well.
Thank you for clarifying. Then it was the HoF performance where she sounded pretty good.
I’m not a J-Lo fan, but she was very good in Out Of Sight, with Clooney. Great movie, too…
I have a friend who was cheated on by her boyfriend and they made up (at that time). One of the things she did was be very affectionate to him in public; the PDAs were in your face! I thought of it as her marking her territory at the time. They’re no linger together.
Fair or not, that’s how JLo’s behavior is hitting me.
Yeah I feel like when the pr dies down. They will announce the divorce. Why can’t women in hollywood figure it out. When your already making a ton of money. Then why do you need to be married to be happy. And they just go from one marriage to the next. Find a guy you like. Make sure they keep their own home. And date for at least five years. Then talk about marriage. Their all like Kim Kardashian. Their more worried about the wedding being so over the top. That they don’t worry about the marriage.
She won’t ever let the PR die down.
Totally agree! And we’re already seeing photos of them again where they’re kissing but he’s looking past her at his phone. Plus those 2 videos of him screaming at her in the car looked abusive to me.
I had a similar thought, ML. Their last go round was very public too, and when the betrayal happened, it was splashed all over the tabloids. I almost can see being overly public with the new happy ending.
Jennifer is truly one of the last celebrities left in the sense that she’s completely bonkers and not self aware and not afraid to show it. The Ayo story is so obnoxious because everyone rolls their eyes at Jennifer having to share this moment and trying to say that Ayo was impressed by her performance… which I am sure was not the case.
Also, why did the Variety journalist call Khloe an icon???
Not a single lie detected here. How passive aggressive it is with the Ayo mention.
The Ayo story was classless and without grace. So many things wrong with what JLo said.
Yeah, that was just Ayo doing to right, polite thing because she’s not a monster, and Jennifer devouring it and regurgitating it as an ego boost.
Has any performer, celebrity, or politician ever used the “I” word as much as her? It is always all about her.
I’ll watch her Bennifer content for sure. JLo is cool and she tries to create her own content instead of waiting for it to come to her. No problem with that.
We throw around the word narcissist way too much these days but WOW if the shoe fits.
Yes, she actually reminded me of Trump with her Ayo story, “tears in her eyes.” I gave myself a headache from rolling my eyes so hard.
She’s no Beyoncé. She thinks she is, but she’s wrong.
Agreed, Besides the incredible talent, Beyoncé also has the self awareness that JLo in her 10+ years on Bey is absolutely lacking.
THIS.
I’m pessimistic, but I kinda feel like this is a bit to retain her youth. She’s carrying on about this great love, but what about her kids? His kids? She’s acting like this is the kind of love you fall in at 20, hoping to make us feel that she’s younger than she is to retain her relevance.
Ben at 50 is fine, he’s an employable actor, reasonably good director and well connected. He’ll have a career as long as he chooses it.
JLo at 50 is still jaw droppingly good looking, but has never been a strong enough actor to carry the kind of roles offered to 50 year old women, and music sales are geared towards young people.
So, to me, this feels like a way to continue to look young to hold onto this part of her career while she still can.
She had most streamed movie worldwide on Netflix last year. You guys need to take the oversized noise about her on social media with grain of salt. It hasn’t hurt her business thus far. She has carried films on her own just last year which did well and has more in the pipeline this year.
Do you know how many movies and shows I have watched for maybe 15 minutes on Netflix. And then stopped and will never go back. Yet those 15 minutes count towards all those minutes they count as being a popular show. Her movie came and went in about a week. And isn’t really talked about anymore. So don’t buy what Netflix is trying to sell you.
You guys always say these bullshit crap anytime people you don’t like get successful. Her film trended for weeks after release, her alcohol brand does well, her make up line does well, her shoe brand does well but she doesn’t have audience is a lie people tell themselves at this point.
What Netflix movie?
Please be serious. That movie was TRASH. I watched it and want my two hours back. It was in the top ten for like a second and then word got around at how bad it was and it promptly fell out of the top ten.
And also- Netflix ALWAYS puts the films starring major stars that are Netflix exclusives on the trending list. It’s a marketing tactic. You need to pay attention to whether it STAYS in the trending after the initial release. That is the true measure of if people are actually watching it.
Becks, I think she’s talking about the one where she played an assassin who gives up her kid or something like that.
@Gem – No offense, but if she was so talented, business savvy, etc. then she would be a BILLIONAIRE, not worth the $400 million Forbes or whoever states she’s worth. Her countless “ventures” probably cost more money than what they’re worth.
And BOTH of the movies that she had out last year were TRASH. I turned them off within 15 min thankful I didn’t have to watch anymore of it.
And I can bet any money the $20 million mortgage on her home that she took out with Ben was for this vanity project. I can’t believe Ben actually agreed to put his production company’s name on it. I’d feel sorry for him, but he made his own bed.
Yiikes! Her movie was BAD. So awful. I too want my two hours back.
So before she relinked her romance with Ben she didn’t have anything to offer? Is that why she’s milking it this much?
I have no idea why there need to be two films? And if one of them is a musical isn’t that just a retread of the album? Anyways, one thing I am sure of is that the Jenny From the Block video is freakin iconic and I have no idea why she says she would have just wanted it to be her walking around the Bronx instead!
What’s funny about the Ayo/podcast thing is that JLo herself did the exact same thing back in her early career. During an interview, she made multiple negative comments about several actresses she felt were overrated. And it blew up in her face 10 or 15 years later when it resurfaced and J was working with the very people she publicly criticized. Its a full-circle moment.
Exactly this, @Mrs. Smith. I love JLo so this isn’t a knock on her, but to anyone who is mad at Ayo please look up JLo’s Movieline interview from I believe 1998. Both are youthful, new-to-the-business mistakes. What JLo said is arguably worse than Ayo stating facts (and again, I love JLo!).
This production is a lot but I believe that he loves her very much and she obviously love him. Hopefully she gets it all out of her system and she can just enjoy her marriage and her life. I’m in the minority in thinking that they will be fine, even happy.
Is the greatest love story never told…..hers and Ben’s story? because I feel like we were there every step of the way, both times. It’s been told, lol.
She sounds…..like she’s been fully immersed in celebrity-land for decades and has lost all sense of perspective. The fact that other celebrities are like, uhhhh, maybe this is too much….tells me she really has lost the plot, as Kaiser says.
If he treated her badly, the first time around, maybe this is her revenge? 😉🙃
Hmmmmmm. Does she have Harry & Meghan envy?
Love me some J-Lo but you have to have an iconically desirable love interest to pull that one off—even with a banging soundtrack.
Ben Affleck is not that.
This is bonkers but also completely on brand. I bought that This Is Me…Then album in college. That entire album was a basic love letter to Ben (Dear Ben). That one song was just there pouring out her heart to that man (I love you/You’re perfect/The perfect man to me). It was cringe to me at the time. When their relationship crumbled, it made the album doubly cringey. I always felt to Jen that he was the one who got away, and Marc was her settling for the man who always wanted her more than she wanted him. So now, having all of these projects focused on him just feels very J. Lo. Bless it
I mean, this is J Lo to a T right? She’s in love with love and she’s EXTRA. Everyone knows this. What connection does Khloe have to this situation though? Lol.
Ayo wasn’t wrong, Jennifer’s singing career has always been a scam. She is known to barely sing on her records with ghost singers and writers. What she is excellent at is spectacle and dancing. Her acting is also good but she doesn’t have the range needed for a lot of the roles for women in their 50’s.
Ayo seems like a nice person, so I do believe she apologized because I can’t imagine she’d want to embarrass or hurt someone. However, this description of the apology seems like a bit much and I feel that did not happen.
I also feel Ayo is classy enough to just let it go and will never speak of it again.
I don’t even know what to say about the rest… I guess wow.
I can’t imagine that anyone would begrudge her this. It makes her happy. I don’t understand the constant judgement and negativity spewed at anyone who does anything.
THIS ^^^^
100%
Meh, I’m in the camp of who cares, let Jennifer be Jennifer. She loves love, and at the end of the day isn’t that a beautiful thing? I just read that people who are able to bounce back quickly in relationships when there is heartbreak, who don’t stay bitter and angry, have much happier life outcomes. We can all probably learn from JLo, lol.
I think this will be a beautiful spectacle and I will watch both films. 🙂 I’m rooting for these two and I think they may be okay this time around. Both in their 50’s, a lot of life has been lived and perspectives have shifted.
Oof. It sounds like she’s still traumatized by their first relationship and thinks this is her do-over chance to fix everything. It reads as a midlife crisis.
The description of the apology… wow. Talk about Trump-style self-service for her ego. Did Ayo say “Sir, you were the best president ever!” with tears in her eyes too?
I commented the same thing above, that it was a completely Trumpy BS story.
Actually, I have heard really good things about the film and have also heard the album is solid as well. Figuring out the streaming algorithms and playlists needed to make a song a hit is an advance Calculus, so I don’t expect Sza numbers, but I do think the film version will stream well on Amazon. Last year, her films on both Amazon and Netflix were the platforms’ top streamers of the year. Plus, the fact that Amazon purchased the film and threw a big premier for it shows they have some confidence in the product.
If Ben didn’t know that this is exactly what Jennifer is like by now, he shouldn’t have married her.
I think the fact that Ben said he wanted those love letters he wrote to JL kept private & she just is exposing them to the world speaks volumes about their relationship. She clearly did not care what he thought & did what SHE wanted…Ben’s feelings aside.
Thanks for bringing that up. When I read about that yesterday, that really shocked the hell out of me. Ben is a guy who has always been clear about wanting his love life area to be relatively quiet. And then he literally walks into her studio and sees her, sitting there with her producers, showing them all of his love letters? It just sounds like she does whatever she wants, whenever she wants, and never really takes into consideration what anyone else might want. She didn’t ask if he would be comfortable with her sharing all of his stuff to the entire world, she just went ahead and put it out there anyway, despite his obvious reluctance. I just find that extremely problematic in any relationship. When it looks like two people who are obviously NOT on the same page, and aren’t communicating and talking things through. So yeah, unless she calms the hell down and stops treating her marriage like she’s starring in a movie role, I don’t see them lasting.
@KRISTIN Thanks you!! It was a very HUGE red flag for me. She doesn’t seem to take his feelings into considerarion at all, his reluctance to overshare their relationship is palpable in her variety profile but she doesn’t seem to care or even notice. I guess he’s going along with it because he still seems to have some sort of guilt for almost leaving her at altar 20 years ago but if she keeps pushing i could see him have a breaking point.
Crazy how she didn’t learn a thing from bennifer 1.0
“I get it. It took me a long time. I’m scared. But I don’t act like I’m scared — that’s the secret to my whole f–king career.”
Last week, during her first of two SNL performances, my husband turned and asked me why so many other musicians/performers were getting onstage with her?? I said to him, “I feel bad for her; she is so insecure. This is a woman who has her live performances autotuned before they’re uploaded to YouTube; this woman had her nose ‘fixed’ in every individual frame of a music video.”
My husband said, in realization, “She doesn’t want anyone to look at her.” Right, not directly. She wants to be ‘witnessed’ — we all do, tbf — but she is terrified of being perceived. She needs an entourage, an audience, and a narrative she can control.
Jenn, your comment nailed this for me. I agree 1000%
I think some of these commenters never left 2003. The internalized misogyny is staggering. He directed one of the 3 things and just had her in the DD commercial as the cool one. He is as much into the fame, PR, and public side of their relationship as she is. He is just a white guy who gets a pass for a lot. When they first got together again, everyone talked about the glow up because she makes him look better and he KNOWS it.
Regarding Ayo, I am sorry, but how many times have commemters mentioned that the Duchess of Sussex is a Saint and how they would not be able to forgive slights from others so easily. She is allowed to say whatever she wants about someone being rude about her. I Said what I said. If someone made similar comments about my work, I would be rightfully pissed.
The fact she left all the negative comments from friends in the doc makes me think it is part of the narrative to show she is willing to go all in despite the naysayers (which is a narrative she consistently mentions.
I just said a lot for not being a huge fan, but I just think we need to do better at spotting and checking our own misogyny and implicit biases.
She is not a great singer or actress, but she works so damn hard, looks so damn good and BELIEVES she is a peer of Beyonce (or even a little above Queen Bey). The self-delusion has totally worked for her, though. I’m wondering if people could think of other singers/actors where this whole equation is true. Usually you need the talent.
I love that J. Lo’s kids and Ben’s kids seem to be the very best of friends, like best possible step-sibling relationships. Also, Jennifer Garner is the classiest act to have ever graced this planet.
JLo lost me years back when I saw a clip of her her on some talent show saying, “You gotta have something that makes people want to look at you.”
Something about the way she said it, like it was the most profound thing ever, made her completely ridiculous and deeply tragic as a person to me. Her whole existence is this self-actualisation through fame / attention / having gawkers. She’s as deep as a puddle. I actually find her depressing to read about.
Anyway, I’m sure she’s heartbroken that some random person wrote her off like that.
(It’s “felt really bad” and not “felt really badly”.)
I heard a story about how she treated a service person that is completely in line with all of this as well as this latest spectacle. She was dismissive and didn’t look the service person in the eye or acknowledge her as a person; spent most of her time absorbed in looking at herself; and could not even engage with her kids (at least during this incident). She seemed to be exactly the stereotype of a narcissistic and rude hollywood celebrity – Im kind of amazed at how she’s gone so far on her own hype but then look at Trump. I guess there’s something to be said for egomaniacal self confidence lol.
It’s “felt really badly,” though, if you’re exploring a darkened cave or trying to read Braille for the first time 😀
My thoughts on this:
Jennifer is so caught up in the display of their great love. There’s been enough video and/or photographs that catches her snapping at him or acting like his mother to show they are just a normal couple, not just all of the papped perfect couple she loves. She’s good for Ben in that before they got together he had gotten himself back together, but I think Jen has solidified that. He may not be completely sober forever, but he is very stable.
He has his production company, which keeps him in town more so that he can actually see his kids the full 50 percent shared time he has, and not being away all the time on location gives this marriage a solid chance of lasting. Ben does not want to put his children through a new blended family and all the hard work that entails and then putting them through another divorce. I do believe he is committed. J-Lo will never leave him. She takes a lot from men. She likes this love story.
This does sound like overkill even for Jennifer, but it’s her money. He’s supporting her. But the one thing Ben doesn’t ever want again is to be a joke careerwise like what happened with them before. That’s where she needs to tread carefully regarding this whole campaign this era. If it is a huge flop, and he feels it makes him look bad or cringy or cheesy, will he resent her? I just don’t think people care about this grand love story she is making into a massive project.
It’s overkill. Jennifer’s singing is not good, yet she continues to make music. Jennifer hasn’t had a successful movie in years, yet she wastes money on this project. Just stop before her husband leaves her like he left his last Jennifer.
Come on. She’s a pop star. She’s a performer. That’s her strength: dancing. Doing big pop shows with dancers. She doesn’t have to be a great singer if she put out pop music fans loved. For a period of time, she did. She’s been the lead in three streaming movies in the last three years. In her 50s, that’s considered success even if two of them weren’t that good. Well, one was really bad. LOL
Ben is supportive of this endeavor since she was determined to go through with it. He even offered advice. Since he’s gotten with her, it appears he’s been doing whatever she wanted. A pap-filled family honeymoon, on and on.
I think Ben has really come to admire the empire she has built. He hit 50 and is terrified of becoming irrelevant. He likes being a power couple.
But he will always be Ben, and at some point, Ben’s grumpy face will be in more photos than the loved-up photos. Not to say he will leave her. He will just be over appearing by her side for things, because J-Lo is a busy woman, always promoting. A-Rod loved that kind of thing. Not Ben, unless he’s by Matt’s side doing publicity for their stuff. Then he’s the happiest you will ever see Ben. LOL
I don’t have a beef with Jennifer Lopez, but I’ve never been much of a follower of her music and acting projects because her stuff is just not what I’m into. But I never got them as a couple. It’s like when you have that guy friend who has a girlfriend who is lovely and nice but you have no idea what they have in common or talk about or do together. So when they break up you’re like yeah, it just didn’t make sense, friend. Then they get married and you have to go to their over the top weird wedding and see all her weirdly love-bombed photo shoots and “my hubs is the best” FB posts and just cringe a little every time.
“He hit 50 and is terrified of becoming irrelevant. He likes being a power couple.”
100% agree with you. Absolutely.
“He hit 50 and is terrified of becoming irrelevant. He likes being a power couple.”
I disagree, Men in Hollywood don’t have an expiration date the same way women have, 50 is a good age for a man to have there, especially for someone like him who wants to be taken seriously as a director and he knows it.
Jlo always strikes me as the one terrified of becoming irrelevant with the overly sexual music video at 54, jumping on collaborations with trendy artists, tiktoks, she was even a youtuber for awhile ect
She was seems desperate to recreate her peak instead of evolving and maturing with her age.
I am here for this. If Jlo wants to spend $20 mil of her own money to show us her love story then I will invest $20 to watch it but at least I’ll have had popcorn. Win win