Busy Philipps strikes me as someone who is always hustling, which I can’t hate on. Right now, she’s starring in the third season of Girls 5Eva on Netflix. (Side note: Girls 5Eva is such a great comedy; I totally recommend it. The full series is 22 episodes, 30 minutes each.) In addition to promoting G5E, Busy is also, uh, busy talking up her new talk show, Busy This Week, which premieres on May 8 at 10:00 p.m. ET on QVC+. This weekly talk show is 30-minutes long and its premise is “Busy on the couch to get an unscripted take on whatever has kept us busy this week. From celebrity guest interviews and laugh-out-loud moments to personal stories and her favorite curated shopping finds, Busy will give her audience a healthy dose of [retail] therapy.”
But those are the only two projects that Busy has going on right now. She’s also a new spokesperson for the ADHD medication Qelbree. Five years ago, both Busy and her older daughter Birdie were diagnosed with ADHD. In a recent interview with USA Today, Busy spoke more about her diagnosis, including her personal symptoms, how it felt to suddenly have a reasoning behind some of her behavior patterns, and finding a treatment that works for her.
You may think it’s just part of being a parent, thinking you’re overwhelmed constantly. But If you’re struggling and feeling bad about yourself because you’re constantly forgetting things, “it’s worth taking two hours for yourself to invest in your own mental health, and figure out what’s actually going on,” Philipps, 44, tells USA TODAY over a Zoom call from New York.
When Philipps’ daughter Birdie, now 15, was having issues in school, a doctor in Los Angeles started talking to her and ex-husband Marc Silverstein about Birdie and ADHD. The symptoms sounded too familiar.
“My ex-husband and I just started looking at each other because I checked every single box at the highest level,” she says. For years, Philipps thought there was something wrong with her. That she didn’t have follow-through, was lazy or forgetful. Hollywood labeled her “ditzy.”
“I allowed that, especially in my teen years, to be a word that was used to describe me,” she says, “I’m actually not at all ditzy, I’m super focused, and I’m really highly productive and I have great ideas. I just had a struggle my whole life with follow-through with making sure I could prioritize them.”
It manifested as low self-esteem; she’d grow jealous of people who seemed to be productive and keep dates and times straight when she couldn’t even write things down correctly. In her 20s and 30s she used to show up 40 minutes early and hang out in her car – just to make sure she wasn’t late.
“I could not figure out how to be on time, because I would get distracted,” she says.
ADHD shows up differently for girls and women, with symptoms like Philipps’: trouble focusing and keeping organized and maintaining interest. For boys and men, hyperactive and impulsive symptoms are more common. That’s why many girls and women may be underdiagnosed, therefore untreated. Treatments can range from medication to behavior and lifestyle management, according to Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD).
After Birdie’s diagnosis Philipps found a doctor of her own and tried out different treatments, ultimately improving both her productivity and how she felt about herself. She currently takes Qelbree, a non-stimulant ADHD treatment approved for adults in 2022; she’s now a paid spokesperson for the brand.
Beyond the medication, though, she has other coping mechanisms: She always writes things down in a notebook and maintains a big calendar in her house with important dates and times. While she appreciates people are discussing mental health all over TikTok and Instagram – and she learned details about ADHD symptoms she didn’t know before – she reminds fans that her ADHD diagnosis and treatment plan came from a doctor, not an influencer.
“We all have to be critical thinkers,” she says, “and we all have to be able to understand that the internet is not the be-all, end-all of everything and sometimes not even the most truthful information.”
I feel all of this so hard because I was also diagnosed with ADHD in my late 30s. Similar to Busy, my catalyst for getting tested was Mr. Rosie suspecting that our son has it. That research made him realize that I checked most of the boxes as well. He used to joke that I always did things “at 100% for 80% of the time,” meaning that I was super productive until it was time for the follow-through. I’m glad that Busy also got her diagnosis, treatment, and peace of mind. I like that although she’s being paid to talk about her treatment, she stresses that you need to figure out the different things that work best for you. Prior to my diagnosis, I started bullet journaling because I found that the routine and accountability helped me stay on track, even if there are days that my brain just won’t start, despite knowing what had to be done.
Like Busy, I also used to feel really down on myself, wondering why I couldn’t do something until the very last minute (“I’m a night owl!” “I thrive under pressure!”) or that I needed to finish a project in one sitting or else I’d lose motivation and never get back to it. Honestly, I still get frustrated with myself some days. Finding out that nothing was “wrong” with me, that it was just that my brain works differently, was an incredible feeling. There are a lot of online resources to help identify the symptoms, and seeing someone and being prescibed medication can truly can be life-changing. If you’re on the fence about getting tested, I totally understand. Give yourself some grace, and for that matter, please remember that you never know what others may be going through because if you’re going through something, the chances are that you’re not alone.
Photos via Instagram and credit: IMAGO/Barbara Hine/Avalon, IMAGO/RW/Avalon, TheNews2/Cover Images
After thinking for years my mum was commenting tongue in cheek when she repeatedly commented on my obvious ADHD (for context, her job is to assess adults with various learning difficulties), when I finally realised, it felt like an epiphany that suddenly explained my whole life and weird quirks. It was incredibly demoralising then, to attempt to get an assessment through the NHS, to be told that as a high functioning woman, I ‘have a good job and are obviously therefore fine’ and ‘probably just have anxiety’. It felt so dismissive I never tried to pursue a private assessment. It felt like being told I was attention seeking and trying to put a random label on myself for fun, because the nurse decided within 20 mins she knew better and I didn’t need an assessment. Getting taken seriously as an adult woman, without going private, is almost impossible it seems. Interestingly, men I know that also have ‘good jobs’ got a diagnosis just fine. Just a bit of a rambly rant but it still winds me up.
Hi @cherhorowitz. Sorry to hear that. You are right: ADHD folks can be very successful and getting an assessment, especially for women, can be difficult. Ugh. I watch a UK- based ADHD and autistic Youtuber called “I’m Autistic, Now What?”. She is used to navigating the UK system and has VERY well-researched videos. And she is likeable to boot. I recommend checking her out for community, if you haven’t already. All the best x
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 28. I refused to attempt to get pregnant or have kids until I “figured out what was wrong with me”.
I felt like everyone had been given a manual at birth and were able to consult it at whim while I had been given a used target bag full of shredded documents.
Finding out I had adhd changed my life. It’s forever a before I knew and an after. The relief was amazing.
I felt like my whole life I was left handed but being made to use my right hand. Finding out I had adhd was just like – hey. Use your left hand. Ok.
Also my adhd meds are absolutely the best most effective anti anxiety medication I have ever been on. The first day I took the medication, I arrived at my (ironically) therapy appt on time. Not rushing. Not stressed. I looked down at my digital watch – important for me – and saw I was three minutes early. Without really trying.
When I tell you that I wept …. Believe me.
ADHD was only one piece of my puzzle though. I am also high masking autistic – which is a whole ass other thing that I’ve only started to figure out. But to be 40 and finally understanding aspects of yourself you have waged war against for decades – it’s a lot.
I am also the same and not only have the meds for adhd helped but working with therapist trained on how to treat high masking/functioning autistic people has been a game changer. Now I just am working through all the shame and anger I had built up after decades of struggle but there is a path and life is getting better. It is a lot but from on tism/Adhd’er to another I am sending you much love and a bajillion internet hugs. We are gonna be alright
I live in the USA. For context.
This was some time ago – when more psychologists and therapists had openings.
I made two appts to see two different people on the same day. I had meant to cancel the 2nd appt since I had been able to get in to see an adhd specialist.
The 1st dr – an adhd specialist – listened to me for about 10 minute. Then asked me questions for about 15. And then she just looked at me. And said – you must hate yourself a lot. I asked what she meant. And she asked if I thought everyone got through grad school by mentally berating themselves non stop. I just sat there, because I hadn’t thought about it like that, I just knew that that’s what I had to do to get things done. Or so I thought. . ……. And she gently explained to me that I had adhd and what that meant and the areas that it effected me. And she asked if I knew my IQ. Because she suspected it was extremely high. And I told her yes I did and told her the range I had always tested within. Which is technically a genius range.
The 2nd dr appt – I kept it since the late fee was way higher than the copay and I was riding high on behind diagnoses. I thought that I could talk more coping skills with the second Dr. Who didn’t specialize in adhd and def not in adhd in women and the co morbid issues related to late in life diagnosis.
The second therapist was so scornful. She said there was no way I had adhd as I made it through college and grad school. I was “just depressed and anxious”. And all my super positive feelings I had had from the first Dr evaporated and I was left with the life long anger at myself.
I sat there and listened to her and got angrier and angrier. At her. At her ignorance. At the way she was treating someone coming to her for help.
I told her that I had already been diagnosed by a PSYCHOLOGIST that specialized in adhd that very morning and I had only come to see her since I had forgotten to cancel the appt. I told her the way she talked to me was so crappy and dismissive and I couldn’t imagine anyone getting anything positive for their mental health from her if this was the way she treated all patients at their most vulnerable.
I’ve always come across as ditzy and flighty because I talk fast, jump from topic to topic because my brain moves super fast and they are connected in a way … people in my super competitive hS, my college department or my grad school department were always stunned to see me on the deans list.
They always said that they knew I was intelligent from the way I asked and answered questions – but maybe just not school intelligent. More like …. Talking intelligent. Whatever that means. but that I also seemed like a chicken with its head cut off running around to find things and writing my assignments IN CLASS that were due at the end of class. And they were also furious that they finished their paper a week before it was due, they see me scribbling mine down (my hs teachers accepted hand written papers from me and a couple of my college professors did as well) in class and then they do a bunch of asking around and find out I got the top grade on the paper.
Anyway.
May I ask what medication helped you?
My daughter was just diagnosed at 17 w ADHD, after her primary care physician dismissed it bc, under the Vanderbilt test, she seemed fine. But we got thorough testing from a psychiatrist and that more detailed testing confirmed it.
I was diagnosed autistic a couple of years ago, and I had a similar feeling of relief when I finally realized that some of my quirks weren’t due to a lack of willpower or inability to get it together. It’s very freeing to realize your brain just works differently.
I hope that as more people — particularly those who have seemed to successfully navigate society with ADHD/autism/etc. — are identified that it allows us all to give each other more grace. About everything. I love seeing people be their authentic weird selves.
I was just recently diagnosed as autistic. The adhd part was years ago and a huge a HA! moment.
I didn’t explore getting evaluated for autism for a long time because at first I thought – well. What does it matter? There aren’t meds for that so …
And then later on, I realized how deeply I had internalized the stigma around autism.
Watching friend after friend get similarly diagnosed – people I loved and respected – and feeling how it didn’t change how I viewed them or felt about them – plus finding community on tik tok and YouTube was life changing.
All these little habits and struggles that I barely acknowledged anymore – seeing someone else talking and joking about it – was so liberating.
So here I am.
Yes, I suspected I was autistic for a few years before getting evaluated since I figured there was nothing anybody could do about it. But having it affirmed was life-changing. I feel like I can work with myself rather than against myself now, and social situations are so much easier for me to navigate now that I understand why I felt so lost and stressed. It’s also made me more willing to try new things because I understand how to navigate new situations to reduce anxiety.
I diagnose and treat ADHD at work and let me tell you one of my pet peeves.
There’s some mom, who is looking at her daycare aged / preschool aged child and saying, oh something isn’t right I think he has ADHD. She spends every day with this child and does everything for him. She says I think he has ADHD to the people she knows, family, friends, and pediatrician. They chime back with
-oh he’s a boy
-he just has a lot of energy
-you’re a first time mom
-etc
Then (this is where the peeve really comes) the kid goes to TK / kinder whatever; and some teacher lady who we don’t know and we know so little about her or what level of functioning she’s at, -that- lady says oh I think there’s a thing, and all of a sudden (!!!!!) -all- -of- -a- -sudden- we’re allowed to entertain the possibility that kid has ADHD.
The relative expert on that particular child has been trying to talk about this for years, but nope. Nobody’s gonna listen to her. But the lady we don’t know, who hasn’t known the kid for long and has a very circumscribed interaction balanced along with 20 other kids – that lady everyone’s gonna listen to.
I cannot stand that scenario.
Ladies, just go straight for child psychiatry.
I recently had my child formally diagnosed, and, while I’m happy I did it, it cost $2,000 after insurance.
We’re not all that expensive. I’m sorry it cost that much.
Good for her, I hope the diagnosis provides some resolution for her.
Echoing your sentiments on Girls5Eva — it is laugh-out-loud funny and Busy is great on the show.
Diagnosed just under a year ago, at 56. It explained So Much. I’m on medication now, and starting to work in strategies etc. The biggest issues I am having are (a) grief and anger at the life I tried really hard to build and just couldn’t, and (b) most of the folks in my immediate circle thinking it’s not real, or that the only symptom is distraction. Oh, and trying to unpack all the shame and guilt for the forgotten birthdays, missed appointments, etc ad nauseum.
As someone also diagnosed at 39, if I hear « you just need to write it down » ONE MORE TIME. …
Yes, I’ve « tried a day planner », Sharon. Where do you suggest I write down my reminder to use it?
Rosie, DYK psychiatrists have identified 7 different types of ADHD?
So for anyone who got diagnosed a bit later in life and always felt a little bit confused or couldn’t understand why they didn’t tick all the *typical* ADHD boxes (loathe that statement, I’m so sorry I had to use it) it’s because ADHD is not and has never been a one-size-fits-all
I know I can’t link to unverified sources here, so I encourage those of you on this journey to do your own research. Speak to your Physician, Psychiatrist, Psychologist
You are not alone and there is nothing *wrong* with you. And I wish anyone grappling with this — the support, stability, routine and (healthy) coping mechanisms they need. X
I do know! My husband has done a ton of research on ADHD over the last two years. He doesn’t want to get tested but is pretty certain that he has a different type of ADHD than I have (I think he does too). When I was growing up (in the 90s), there was such a focus on boys with the stereotypical symptoms that it never occurred to me that what I was going through could also be that. I’m really grateful that he went down such a rabbit hole and presented me with all of the info that convinced me to get tested.
Ah Rosie 🥹 just sending you a (hopefully) consensual, virtual, platonic hug of support and compassion.
I agree there was so much info about stereotypical hyperactive boys in the late 90’s at grade school but it was thought it was virtually unheard of in girls 🤯 Grrrrr
But maybe you’re a dreamer who sometimes struggles with focussing on one task at a time or with organisational skills 🤷🏻♀️
All the best 🌷
Thanks, Hannah! Hugs right back. 🙂
My story is exactly this –getting my son services, kept forgetting appointments/bill payment, his dr. casually mentioned the practice’s adult services–, but I HATE that she’s shilling some new drug. The pharmaceutical industry is icky enough without celebs hawking psych drugs too.
(Although, if it frees up the Adderall supply for the rest of us to actually get our prescription filled, maybe I don’t totally hate it…)
I just saw an article that more women are being diagnosed with ADHD as they are going through perimenopause and menopause. Apparently the shift in hormones makes the symptoms more clear to connect.
Yes!!! Came here to say the exact thing…. sometimes women can kind of “keep it together” until peri/menopause hits. Then when hormones plummet their ADD/ADHD symptoms explode and become unmanageable! That is exactly what happened to me. I could (mostly……with a lot of effort) manage my life until age 39 when my hormones went nuts and let me tell you, all my executive functioning abilities were absent. It had a huge impact on my work! I almost got fired b/c I couldn’t manage all the administrative reporting required for my job. Long story short, saw a psychiatrist, got meds, and they were life-changing. Until I had to stop due to heart palpitations. But that’s another story!
I was diagnosed in my 40s and my best friend was diagnosed in his 50s. It’s never too late to make positive changes so don’t hesitate to explore it at any age!
My 7-year-old son was diagnosed with ADHD last year and oh, it got me thinking. We’re in Germany, so have affordable health care, but I can’t seem to find someone to do the diagnostic tests with me. They all have long waiting lists and don’t even accept new patients, unless you pay out of pocket, which I don’t think I can. I think that I should do well because of my to-do lists, day planners, alarm clocks, but feel more overwhelmed and paralyses and guilty every day. Parenting Kids with ADHD while you probably have ADHD isn’t fun. Well I guess it could be, at times! Hopefully I’ll get there.
I was diagnosed about ten years ago. I think all the stories about how helpful treatment has been for other people just gets me depressed. I haven’t found relief from medication. Found my way into an inpatient program (as an outpatient) for my co-diagnosed anxiety/depression, only to have my family sabotage my treatment by telling my doctors that they just wanted things “to stay the same.” Had to leave the program early, because the last part was about building a family support program. Also went back to my job without an accommodations plan and was fired not long after. Marriage fell apart because husband said “why should I put up with a wife like that.” Diagnosis can be helpful, but can also be really hard when you don’t have the support to actually build a new life with the knowledge.
Sorry to trauma dump, but I’m dealing with fallout from all of this right now.
I am so, so sorry you didn’t have the support. Hugs! Sending you so much strength.
I had an unconventional “diagnosis”. I was bipolar and after being stabilized on meds I was still struggling with focus and other things. I mentioned my symptoms to my psychiatrist and she was like, lets try a low dose of Adderall and it helped a lot. For me it was like putting mental glasses on, everything became a little clearer and easier. Adderall is not magic, I still struggle a lot with some tasks but a lot of things are much easier now
ADHD is difficult to deal with when you don’t have consistent healthcare is really difficult. I knew I had ADHD for years before I was diagnosed and life was difficult. When I was officially diagnosed, I couldn’t afford the meds and then lost my job so no therapy OR meds. Too many years later I finally have access to medication and therapy again and I am 51 years old. I am so grateful for the help I’m getting now but it should not have taken this long.
Healthcare should be FREE.
I got diagnosed at 44 and life has gotten much easier now that I know what is happening, turns out a lot of undiagnosed women once they hit perimenopause suddenly their symptoms get turned up to 11 and now that testing is a bit more accessible we are getting the help we need. I am glad that this is becoming so normalized.