Every so often, I get a hankering to cut my hair above my shoulders. I try to ignore these thoughts for a few months before inevitably giving in just to see what it looks like. I then almost always immediately regret it and spent two years growing it out. I went through these motions back in March, so since then, I’ve been in the “I made a terrible mistake” part of the cycle. Apparently, when it comes to my hair, I am a goldfish.
Anyway, all of that preamble was to talk about Jessica Biel’s new haircut. Jessica, who has rocked a longer hairdo with waves for a while now, is trying to set a new trend. Over the weekend, she got a summer haircut: a bob. Oh, wait, I’m sorry. Jessica didn’t just get any old bob. No, she got a self-described “f–ck ass bob.” I have no idea what that means because it just looks like the “mom bob” cut that a lot of celebrities like, Jennifer Garner and Jennifer Love Hewitt, got last year. Anyway, Jessica got a bob and posted before-and-after pictures to her Instagram.
Jessica Biel said goodbye to long hair. The actress shocked her fans when she debuted an ear-length bob in a clip posted to Instagram on Saturday.
She shared a before and after, showing herself tugging on her long locks as she rocked an oversized T-shirt while sitting on a dressing room chair. Biel, 42, then revealed her fresh cut, as she also changed into a chic look, consisting of a gray blazer, white shirt and gold chained necklace.
“Brought back the f–k ass Bob 💇🏻♀️,” she captioned the video. The mom of two seemingly left her husband, Justin Timberlake, speechless as he simply commented, “🔥😍🔥😍🔥.”
Meanwhile, some of Biel’s followers were convinced her new look was inspired by her “7th Heaven” character Mary Camden’s short haircut.
“Oh I remember when Mary Camden had this cut 🙌🙌🙌,” one fan commented. The iconic TV series aired from 1996 to 2007.
Others gushed over Biel’s new look, with one writing she “knows how to bring sexy back.”
“You‘re a beauty – love your new hair and your old – you look great,” another added.
“SO CHIC LOVE! 💕,” a third chimed in
“Yes and ABSOLUTELY YES!” a fourth noted.
Biel also took to her Story to share the aftermath of her cut as she showed loads of hair on the bathroom floor. The “Next” star seemingly waited to undergo this major transformation until after the 2024 Met Gala on May 6. She walked the red carpet wearing a plunging V-neckline pink dress with feathers and styled her hair down with light waves.
She looks…fine? It also looks like she did some lighter highlights as well. Yeah, it looks okay, but I think it makes her look older. I’m not saying that’s good or bad, that’s just my opinion. She definitely needed to change it up from that ratty imitation beach hair look that she was doing beforehand, though. I was nearly scandalized by how terrible her hair looked at the Met Gala. I think she’d look really good with shoulder-length hair and long layers, actually.
Meanwhile, over on the Artist Formerly Known as Twitter, there’s lots of comments and speculation about the reasoning behind Jessica’s haircut. Basically, they’re calling it a “divorce bob” and have a countdown going for a separation announcement coming soon. I mean, I’m not going to write that assessment off whatsoever, even if JT did comment with a bunch of fire and heart-eye emojis. We’ll find out soon enough if Jessica said bye bye bye to her long hair because she doesn’t want to be a player in Justin’s game for two anymore. But you know what? Unlike Jessica, I refer to my haircut every single day as “this f-cking ass bob” so if she’s happy, then power to her. Live your f-ck ass bob truth, girl.
Separation announcement to follow within the next 6 months. Clock it. https://t.co/ACckgkJ1C2
— Sassington, M.C. (@MissSassbox) May 20, 2024
Oh she’s getting ready to leave him https://t.co/zP1AljkxSa
— Meech (@MediumSizeMeech) May 20, 2024
Photos credit: Cover images, Getty and via Instagram
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- Celebrities attend the 2024 Met Gala Celebrating ‘Sleeping Beauties: Reawakening Fashion’ at The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City Featuring: Jessica Biel Where: New York, United States When: 06 May 2024 Credit: Michael Stewart/INSTARimages.com
It could be cute, if she washed it.
ha! That’s what I thought too! I just looks dirty and unstyled !
Im not into this. If id see this on tiktok, id be like wtf is this. This is not inspirational, it’s just a cut. Good for her if she likes it.
I don’t really like the Bob, but I also don’t really care for her. Separation rumors are probably accurate. I talked to my hairdresser about the pre divorce haircuts, a mutual friend had dyed her hair red then cut it short and then left her loser husband. I thought it was a way of trying out something risky, he thought it was something women do to exercise control in a situation that feels out of control. I think we’re both right 😂
I vote with your stylist.
In this case I also vote for divorce.
(Hmm … two gorgeous Jessicas – Biel and Lange – both from the Iron Range. How does that work?)
Fuck ass bob came from viral Vine video of two high school girls fighting. One girl told the other she had a “fuck ass bob” and once the video penetrated the zeitgeist the phrase took off online
The sight of all those short little hairs on her skin and the neck of her tee shirt makes me itch. Why wear a stylist cape if you’re not going to snug it up around your neck?
She gives off that “pick me” girl vibe I’ve never been fond of. The hair cut if washed and styled is cute – she has the face shape for it – Hope she’s washing that perpetually stoned man child out of her hair
It would be cute with a side part and some extra volume, maybe playfully tussled?
Agreed. In this photo her face is so narrow it just makes it look more so. Side part and more volume would be much cuter.
Looks awful. She looks better with long brown hair. This short light colored bob ages her and makes her look ill
totally agree. Side part, shake it out.
Rosie – love the “artist formerly known as Twitter” LOL
Agreed. This looks like a helmet. A helmet that has been vacuum sealed to her head.
You are so right. The reason it makes her look older because she’s styling it in such a dated way.
Yeah, it’s too flat. She needs a French Bob, maybe even with bangs/ fringe. And a side part.
It also seems too short. I think she needs it an inch or two longer. I’m not a fan but hair grows.
But seeing the “before” side in the progress pic makes me understand the cut. The side that is not cut looks super thin and damaged.
Of course I’m gonna say I like it as I have the exact same cut (same length) but mine has layers to give it body. Am also a plat blonde.
Yes it needs something to give volume because it looks like she has thin hair. I have short hair because I lost my beautiful brunette hair. I am now a platinum blonde too. It covers my grey much better.
My shiny, pure white hair is in a pixie and I love it! I think it might be the best my hair has ever looked and it is certainly the most compliments I have ever received.
I find her so bland and colourless. She thinks she’s a lot more attractive than she is. Wasn’t she one of the ones who said she was so beautiful that she didn’t get cast often.
Yes she did say that, she’s neither beautiful nor talented.
Her hair looks terrible. Flat lacklustre boring just like her.
JT looks awful too.
Yes, she did.
She said that? Too funny, I was just thinking that I know women in real life who are actress-pretty, but if she were my real-life non-celebrity friend, I wouldn’t consider her one of them.
I agree about her looks, and that she gives off the vibe that she thinks that she is prettier than she actually is. However, I do respect her for her work as a producer. She’s been busy, even though she didn’t become a sought-after actress like she had expected.
I came here to say just that about her: the only thing I remember about her is her silly claim that she was just too beautiful to get roles in Hollywood. I wondered who’s couch she was on when they fed her that lie — Marilyn Monroe was not hailed as the most beautify woman in world during her day? Audrey Hepburn was not beautiful? How about Grace Kelly? Gwyneth Paltrow? Juliet Roberts? Reese Witherspoon? Seriously, black women in Hollywood were like, hold our beer sister.
Maybe she cut her hair for attention? Is she working on anything right now?
She has always just been a nothing burger. I think that’s why JT picked her,Cameron and Britney were too much personality for him.
Eh, not really a huge fan of this bob. So boring. I feel like it needs layers or graduating lengths, or something. I applaud her for shedding her long hair though.
I am not a fan. At least, not styled like this. I think it ages her, and I also think the center part with the shorter length makes her face look longer in a not- so flattering way. This would look so much better side parted, maybe with a little wave for some volume.
I can’t imagine being married to a someone like Timberlake.. the amount of “mememe look at memememe” is exhausting for people on the outside of their life. Even when he presented Timbaland with his bf present, it was some take of JT singing in the studio while Timbaland was producing for him.. I too would be crying out for attention in any which way I could.
The thought of even spending a day with him feels like a punishnent.
I feel bad for her, being stuck with him.
I think she hitched on to him because she wasnt getting any roles and risked being washed away, and she wanted an a-list lifestyle.
I still remember their wedding cover for People. She was sitting on the ground and he was jumping in the air behind her. Like, what?
Not a fan of the bob on pretty much everyone, including myself. I’ve seen some women pull it off perfectly, but on me I feel like it makes my round face look chubby. Need the length to make things look longer lol
Jessica doesn’t have the fat face concerns but this cut is still doing her no favors. It’s so limp and her hair looks dirty. Maybe styled it’s better? As is no me gusta.
She looks tired
She looks beyond exhausted in the purple dress photograph. So tired, she’s not even sure where she is.
I’ll be shocked if she leaves him. Always came across as the ultimate Look-The-Other-Way girl. It’s not like she didn’t know exactly what she was getting into when she signed that (marriage) contract. But I’ll applaud her if she’s found some backbone in her 40s
Her and JT have always reminded me of The Wales. JT doesnt particularly strike me as liking her and that she should be grateful he chose her. Their People mag wedding pic was cringe does she even act anymore!?
Agree, sure something may have changed but she seems to have signed on for the whole deal and that’s what she’s now living with.
She saw Gone Girl, finally, and thought “I can look as hot as sexy, evil Rosamund Pike, right?”
If cutting off her hair means cutting off her dead-weight, attention-seeking, photo-bombing husband, then this is a good haircut.
You said it! I hope this is a divorce haircut. She can escape that always-out-of-his-league, cultural appropriating no-talent ass clown and enjoy the rest of her life.
Kate disappears and white women everywhere gain the strength to cut off their long hair with curls at the end.
😂
😂😂😂
It doesn’t work with her face.
on a personal note, I am rarely a fan of the center part… yes… roast me…. I’ve made my peace with it. I think it drags down most faces
I’m with you!! Years back a friend said that few people can pull off a centre part and she was right. I’ve tried it just to see a few times and rarely last more than a few hours.
I also agree that the bob/styling of the bob in that pic is doing her no favours. She looks incredibly bland.
As I understand the Tik Tok police decided that a side part is for the ‘old people’.
I hate a center part, i’m a side or die part girl.
I’d respond to the TikTok-ers that expecting everyone conform to one look/style whatever make no sense in this wonderfully diverse world.
SIDE PART GIRLS 4 LIFE
Lord Farad
My guess, she just took her hair extensions out and is giving her scalp a rest. While, I would say I love a cute bob on most women. For Jessica, her face has very sharp angles. And this cut does not suit her face very well.
I think you nailed it! Apparently, at least 30% of the hair she’s usually sported were extensions. Then, she also seems to have flattened what remained.
If she’s leaving her scalp alone, she needs a more angled cut at the ends for volume and some sort of side bangs. Or leave what seems to be her naturally wavy hair, and have a layered bob cut like the one they gave Carrie Bradshaw near SATC last season.
Looks like she took some scissors to her hair in the bathroom. Get some layers, volume, something.
I’m a big fan of short hair, but I don’t really think this suits her. I’d go either bixie or lob on her. This length looks awkward, but maybe she just needs some more styling.
Your first paragraph has me worried now, @Rosie. I’m getting 10 inches of hair cut off today, it will leave my hair about two inches below my shoulders. I was a little worried about before, now I’m distinctly nervous.
Don’t be worried!! I do this to myself every few years despite knowing I never like it lol because my face is not a face for a bob haha. A few inches below my shoulders is my preferred length. I’m sure your hair is going to look so great. Good luck! 🙂
Thanks Rosie. I got a bob once at 16, never again. I think the bob wearers are extremely brave. You hardly ever see a bad one.
Nope. I love a bob, but she looks so much better with the whole beach wave look. Yikes.
Just came here to say that I’ve never commented on any of these sites, but does anyone else ever read these comments and feel sick at how we (females, society) pull each other apart? Maybe I’m just a sensitive, menopausal mom of a teen girl…but I worry that if even the progressive, feminist audience of Celebitchy can’t stop to think about how their words about another human becomes etched on the internet forever, and it’s all so mean, then is there any hope for us at all? I’d hate to read these things about my haircut, or my face, or my teen, or my students (high school teacher here)…yet here it is. Be kind to others. Words do actually wound – and not necessarily Jessica, but maybe a self conscious young woman, who can’t live up to whatever we’re criticizing about another woman.
I also get the desire every so often to cut my hair shorter than usual. Haven’t done so. I give myself home haircuts. Yeah, I know. Not so bad, though. My little mother was so beautiful and cute, had short curly hair, and periodically I would think: if I cut my hair short and perm it and fix it like mom, will it look as cute? Luckily, I told myself no. You won’t look cute like mom. Don’t do it. But I have been telling myself, why not buy a good wig and try out a shorter hair cut and a different color, then I won’t have regrets or grow out time. Haven’t done it yet, but I’m gonna.
Forgot to say, I actually really like her hair. She got highlights, too. I wish I could wear this, but I can’t.
Look at her eyes in the top photo. That is the face of misery.
It’s 90’s hair. This haircut was considered very cute back in the day. She just needs a cute short sleeve t over a long sleeve T shirt.