Page Six: Ben Affleck & J.Lo’s marriage issues began during their honeymoon

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck first got married in Las Vegas, then on August 20, 2022, they had a second wedding at Ben’s Georgia estate. There’s been some discussion about who wanted what – my opinion and my memory of what went down two years ago was that Jennifer was the driving force for both weddings. While Ben popped the question of his own accord, I do feel like Jennifer wanted to lock it down quickly with the Vegas wedding before he got cold feet. The Georgia wedding was a piece of closure – they were originally supposed to get married in Georgia nearly twenty years beforehand. Well, J.Lo chose the second wedding anniversary to file for divorce from Ben. It was a long time coming, and Ben had been checked out of the marriage for most of this year. But Page Six’s sources now say that Ben actually began to check out of the marriage on the honeymoon. The f–k??

The honeymoon was over just as it started …Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez’s relationship issues began on their honeymoon in Lake Como, Italy, a source familiar with the situation tells Page Six. The couple’s honeymoon included numerous public outings packed with PDA and shopping — and, yes, there were of course cameras capturing it all.

“He was unhappy with paparazzi following them. She is an international superstar, and he acted like it came as a surprise that they would be followed around,” the source said. When they weren’t in front of the cameras, “They would barely speak to each other during what was supposed to be the happiest time of their life. He sold her on him being a changed man, and that lasted a very short time,” our source claimed.

Another insider told us Affleck finally came to his senses about their renewed puppy love, once his sobriety “started to settle in with normality.”

When they started seeing each other again, “He was just getting sober … He was in a vulnerable state, and whatever their chemistry played into that … He was in this frenzied, excitable state,” the insider said. Affleck has been open about his struggles with alcohol in the past. He’d reportedly last returned to rehab in 2018.

The whirlwind romance soon wore off once he adjusted to his sober life. Affleck started craving more privacy, and he could no longer take Lopez’s level of celebrity, according to the insider. “He doesn’t want [the entourage] and all the drama that comes with that in his home,” the source said.

[From Page Six]

I felt like Page Six was talking out of their ass so I actually looked back into the 2022 archives. I had no memory of a “honeymoon in Como.” What happened is that after the Las Vegas wedding, Ben and J.Lo took their kids to Paris and they had a family vacation/honeymoon in France in July 2022. Then Bennifer had their second wedding in Georgia in August 2022, and after that, Ben and Jen went on a no-kids honeymoon in Como. They got pap’d constantly on the Paris trip (the photos were amazing, honestly), but the Como honeymoon was relatively low-key. There were some long-lens pap photos when they went out to dinner, but beyond that, we actually didn’t see much of them?

All of which to say, I think J.Lo’s fame was a factor, just as I think Ben’s sobriety was a factor. But their marriage failed for a variety of reasons, reasons which were compounded when Ben basically decided he was over it and he stopped trying.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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94 Responses to “Page Six: Ben Affleck & J.Lo’s marriage issues began during their honeymoon”

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  1. Elena says:

    The Vegas wedding was Ben’s idea. They were planning the Georgia one and the wedding planners were talking about all the details and complications and the weather and Jennifer was getting frustrated because she got flashbacks to 2003. So Ben just said ‘Fuck it! Let’s get married in Vegas tonight!’. You can watch that clip on Jimmy Kimmel.

    • Mcali02 says:

      Yup. But now he will spin it he just wanted to make her happy and didn’t really want to do it.

    • PepperTheCat says:

      Issues started at MARRIAGE plans 2.0.
      You KNOW JLO wanted a fancy pants affair- NOT a querulous quickie.

  2. Steph says:

    So basically, Ben Brooke the rules of sobriety: don’t start a new relationship in the early days off your sobriety. JLo got fucked bc a grown ass man acted like a child.

    • Turtledove says:

      In farness, if we all know that rule of sobriety, so should J-Lo.

      I think we all speculate and can’t really know what anyone was thinking. It seems like J-Lo really loved him and when she thought they had a chance to rekindle things, she really wanted to take that chance. His recent sobriety was a red flag, but I can kind of understand her wanting to ignore it. (easy for me to say, I am the real life human version of the meme that says “I saw all the red flags and thought it was a carnival”)

      I have to wonder, did Ben think he could make it work this time? WE all saw the issues from space, but humans are often not self aware. I sort of look at Ben and think “dude, stop making a mess for all these women! If you aren’t able to be a good partner…leave them alone”. But the big question is does he even realize how incapable he ids of being a good partner?

    • Sober Anon says:

      Hello from someone in her early days of sobriety. And yeah. Sobriety is a hard journey, but worth it. And it’s a lot of work. We addicts are sick and we are selfish. And we have a long history of being dishonest with both ourselves and others. I know this isn’t his first go-around and he understands there are steps to recovery (Hopefully he does?). We have to get right with ourselves first before we start repairing relationships with others (there’s a reason making amends is all the way at Step 9 of 12). Sounds like he didn’t get right with himself first and now she is suffering for it.

      • EllenOlenska says:

        @soberanon congrats on making the journey and we will all be cheering you on.

      • Jaded says:

        Great take @Sober Anon and congratulations on your recovery. You seem to be handling everything perfectly. Wishing you continued success.

      • Mil says:

        @sober anon
        Thank you sharing and validating experiences of us who lived with addicts.
        I wish you all the best on your recovery journey. Getting sober was the best decision u made for yourself in your life. 💙

      • therese says:

        @Sober Anon, thank you for your analysis and kudos for your recovery. Continued success and peace.

      • Tashiro says:

        Good luck with your continued sobriety.

    • Oakley says:

      Was he already sober when he started dating her? He went out of rehab the last time in 2018. In the following years, he had a short fling with whatshername girl in 2019, and then in 2020, he went on hooked up with Ana de Armas for a year.
      He was more than 2 years post rehab when he started to see JLo.

    • Lucy says:

      I saw a woman on insta say she knows someone who knows him, and he’s dry, not sober. He’s not taking accountability for things, which I don’t know if that distinction is just important in AA or if it’s applicable to wider understanding. I thought it made sense and explains this whole thing pretty clearly. I’m glad he’s not drinking, but he sounds more in danger of old habits than I would be comfortable being in a relationship with.

      • Jaded says:

        @Lucy — great point. You can be *dry* but still struggle with conflicts in close relationships, not feeling healthy, and the never-ending devil in your brain saying “I want to drink!” Ben seems to be stuck in that mindset but we all know he’s a passive-aggressive type who will blame others in order to vindicate himself and his selfish behaviour. JLo never should have married him.

  3. Neeve says:

    They should have just dated and seen where that will take them. And as far as Jlos fame,Ben really thought that she was just going to turn into something else over night!?

    • Freddy says:

      Exactly! He has always been a non-famous famous person and she has always lived for the attention—neither is going to change.

      • Mcali02 says:

        Say what??? “He has always been a non-famous famous person”??? 🤣 He has been a walking contradiction since he became famous. He wants and invites the attention, then runs away when he overexposes himself and starts to get negative publicity. He is addicted to crashing and burning publicly, then the high of the comeback. With or without JLo, he is always followed by paps. Why is that his contemporaries like Matt Damon can go under the radar for months and you have no idea what goes on in their life? Affleck lives to be the victim. “Oh I was so in love but my wife was such a…” (insert whatever adjective that makes the women in his life seem like controlling hags that hold him back from being his true self).

        For some reason I have always rooted for him but I am done. He allows the women in his life to take the hit when things get bad. So tired of his BS.

      • harpervalleypta says:

        Yep, I’m going to reiterate, Matt Damon.

        If he *truly* wanted to be a non-famous famous person, he has people IN HIS FRIEND GROUP who model that behavior. I don’t know what MD’s kids look like, or even what his wife looks like. He does his thing and keeps his private life private.

        In comparison, look up the dozens of Dunkin pap walks during covid.

        Now if you made the argument that Ben doesn’t know what he wants, that I could see. That he may want fame on his own terms and to be able to turn it off whenever he wants, but he doesn’t seem to have the self-control to do that. If a famous person wants to keep their private life private, they have to keep ALL OF IT private. None of this, today I’ll go on pap walks and have PDAs, but next week it’s be too intrusive.

        He both wants to go swimming in fame, and thinks the water is too much when he’s in there. He’s jumping in and out and dragging the people around him with him.

        I hope Jen and Jen create the Ex Wives club and have a good life with all the kids enjoying each other and leave Ben to his indecisiveness.

      • Flamingo says:

        eh, he was more than happy to rope her in to do Superbowl Dunkin Donut commercials. That’s not exactly a man that wants to be ‘non-famous’. When a billion people are going to see it.

        Ben comes across as a very, very, charismatic person that can sell sand to desert dwellers. She believed him, she trusted him, and he abandoned her again.

        I hope she takes the next few years putting a moratorium on dating. And figuring out who she is without a partner. And just standing on her own and being with her kids. Wel all love an underdog story, and she has been hammered the last couple of years. And I am just as guilty of criticizing her choices. Jennifer 2.0 and beyond will be something to behold.

      • Mil says:

        Bowie and Iman lived private lives. Their daughter was not papped, and we are talking about two icons, trailblazers. Yet, they were in NYC most of their lives as a couple. Ben is not not famous. He is just… Ben Affleck. He is never to blame. That’s his thing. At least Lopez is honest about her love of attention. I could not live like that, so I never asked for the spotlight.

    • Olivia says:

      Regarding fame and how each deal with it… JLo and Ben are like Taylor and Joe.

      Why they thought it would be different the second time around is a mystery.

  4. MaryContrary says:

    I maintain she gave up after it became clear he preferred the chaos of unsobriety to JLo and their marriage. Nothing else makes sense for Garner to suddenly be holding him together yet again like he’s her other child and for JLo and JG to be co-parenting his kids.

    • Mimi says:

      To be fair, nothing indicates he fell off the wagon. He has been with his kids at various events and Jen Garner was always going to be their for their joint kids.

      • Krista says:

        Agreed

      • Flamingo says:

        “To be fair, nothing indicates he fell off the wagon” I’m sorry, but no. He looked, acted and sounded completely wasted at Tom Brady’s Netflix Roast. Which was live. That was a big indication to me and the media he fell off the wagon.

      • Oakley says:

        @Flamingo, I think it is known that he took medication to combat his severe anxiety and his mood swings. It explains a lot whey he always was uninhibited during interviews live.
        Like back in the late 90s, he was uninhibited with Sandra Bullock when they were promoting Forces of Nature.
        He made trouble with the public when he admitted of taking Viagra for entertaining.
        And then in the 2010s, he made trouble again with his mouth during the 2013 Oscar speech, or in 2021, when he cause public rage when he was talking with Haward Stern. Or in 2021, when he was in Venice, he was clearly on medication with the excessive affection, and at one point, he was so uninhibited that he sticked his tongue out like a child.

      • Flamingo says:

        @Oakley I get your point. But all you are telling me is he abused prescription medication. And an addict is an addict. And they are more than happy to game the system to get high. Matthew Perry was abusing Ketamine and probably thought it was safe since it was prescribed. But was really just getting as high as possible with the euphoria effect it gave. Ben always has lots of excuses for his behavior. And blaming the women in his life is an old crutch he uses.

      • Oakley says:

        @Flamingo, I think it’s completely different situation. Anxiety and depression are diseases. They won’t simply go away if one doesn’t take medication.

      • Flamingo says:

        You’re assuming it’s anxiety I am assuming he was drunk at the Netflix Roast. Agree to disagree.

        and taking medication and abusing medication are two different things

      • Oakley says:

        There is no assumption from myself at least. He admitted publicly that he has severe anxiety issues.

  5. Sophie says:

    He doesn’t want all the drama… but HE IS the drama!

    • Denise says:

      Very very true.
      In my experience when the guy says he doesn’t want drama, it means he is bringing the drama

    • StillDouchesOfCambridge says:

      “He doesn’t want [the entourage] and all the drama that comes with that in his home,” EXACTLY what I was saying. It’s one thing to have the paps around when you’re out – but come on, the entourage when u get home is a definite no for me. But, he shouldve known for both the paps and the entourage, and looks like she knew she didnt want to change that much of her life for him. Good luck to both. There will never be bennifer 3.0, because not only jen love the attention and the pics and and the paps, but since Jen doesnt even drive, so she is dependent always on her entourage.

      • Mimi says:

        Jen loves having people around and he doesn’t. It is draining for an introvert to have people around all the time and it is emotionally distressing for an extrovert to NOT have people around and be the center of attention. I know bc this is my relationship with my mother. My mother LIVES to gossip and laugh and talk with as many people as possible and I just want quiet and solitude. And it makes me so sad to see her wilted when we have no one around for her to bounce that energy off. It is basic incompatibility. I don’t think it’s anyone’s “fault”.

      • Gem says:

        This is disingenuous. JLo was already making her album and working out details of the tour while dating/marrying Ben. She also filmed two movies in that time. Her having her staff around wasn’t because she lives with them day and night. She was neck deep busy in work when Ben and her life began. She didn’t slow down professionally until her separation. I know people love to say she had canceled her tour because of ticket sales but that isn’t true either. She had on average 70% tickets sold with months remaining when she canceled things. Some venues were sold out, rest weren’t but it wasn’t that nobody bought tickets. For a star past her prime, she actually was doing better than a lot of others. The tiktoks have ran so much disinformation about her that people are saying anything. Maybe she should have slowed down professionally. Would that save it? I honestly don’t think so. It would just make the marriage last maybe 5 years instead of 2.

      • Meredith says:

        She moved herself and her school aged kids from Miami to California so I don’t think it’s fair to say she didn’t want to change anything .

  6. Pinkosaurus says:

    I dont remember much coverage of Lake Como either.

    Anyway, I think being with JLo probably makes Ben healthier and more disciplined, and I think he gets tired of that and wants to go back to his old puffy, back tattooing habits (not just drinking). I think his marriage to Jen Garner was the same way. I think Ben chases and marries these women like a New Year’s resolution and then quits after a bit. JG had kids to hold it together for but I’m glad JLo cut her losses.

  7. Eurydice says:

    Sometimes, when it’s over, it’s over. Sometimes, it’s not a matter of trying, but of admitting your mistakes. I’ll bet both of them knew it wasn’t going to work, but dealt with it in their own particular way – he checked out and she flailed around pretending everything was beautiful until it wasn’t.

    • Kitten says:

      Yeah exactly. We’re all gonna have our opinions–mostly fueled by whether we hate/like either person–but at the end of the day they were just a terrible match. It’s weird they didn’t see what everyone else did but the rich and famous are built different. I think they put themselves in a bubble and then it popped much faster than they anticipated.

      • Golly Gee says:

        They clearly had an intense physical and emotional attraction to each other. That’ so often overrides common sense. It gives a false sense of being powerful enough to overcome any differences.

  8. H says:

    I’m not a JLo fan but Ben seems like a big man baby who love bombed her, then once he had her, lost interest and checked out of the marriage. Future Mrs. Afflecks should be aware of this pattern.

  9. Denise says:

    He didn’t mind paparazzi when it suited him with Jen Garner and with Ana de Armas.
    So he basically love bombed her while he was in recovery and she fell for it. I actually blame him more for this, love bombing can be intoxicating and he knew how much JLo wanted a love story. He basically got her on the hook and then ditched her.

    • Turtledove says:

      I see a lot of people referencing his pap walks with Ana and it is really interesting because he really does seem to hate the paps, yet seemed more than fine then.

      But I also wonder if the pandemic had a lot to do with that. He seems to be a homebody and during lockdown, he sure got plenty of “homebodying” in, by force. Makes me wonder if the pap walks were tolerable then because they were sandwiched between long stretches of not leaving the house at all? Almost the way an introvert could probably tolerate one huge party a year and could even enjoy it, but if they had to go to a huge party every week, they’d HATE it?

      Also, J-lo has an entourage IN her home. Ana didn’t. So maybe the walks were fine because he’d then retreat back into the empty house with just her?

      • Isabella says:

        I think he’s boring to live with most of the time.

      • Aurora says:

        And right when the pandemic began, he and Ana were not only dating: They were about to start promoting their very much hyped s3xy movie. So, doing promo might have been an excuse to go out, goof and PDA while they were supposed to stay home. At some point, it was believed that the six weeks global lockdown would end covid… And we know how that went down!
        Ben also seemed happy to mentor Ana (who, by all accounts, is as smart and educated as she’s pretty) and give her career a push. She was dissappointed at having had to struggle for leading roles, after more than a decade of succesfully starring in Spain’s blockbuster shows.
        Some in her Cuban circle credit Ben’s insight as reason why Ana didn’t end up returning to Spain or relocating to Cuba. There was also the less benign rumour of Ben having been coached by industry execs to make Ana fall for him with this very same purpose.
        He definitely looked more content and relaxed with her, as another motive why he submitted to pap walks back in 2020.

  10. Ella says:

    He’s a weird guy. Never looks content. Always looks visually ‘off’.’ Like there’s something wrong mentally.

    • Flamingo says:

      I agree, he always seems unfulfilled in some way. And I think women try to fill the void with love and support. Lord knows he took Jennifer Garner down to hell and back again. And she was and continues to be a rock of support for him. For the sake of their children. I really think Jennifer Lopez did all she could to be a sober companion for Ben and her video and documentary which I just rewatched with different optics. Really meant to be a celebration of it. Not exploit it. But the tone just didn’t hit the way she wanted it to.

      And I got attacked the other day for comparing Ben to my brother who is also an addict. But dealing with a family member that constant falls on and off the wagon is exhausting. No, I am not taking one example and blanketing Ben with it. But there are common denominators with addicts, and I just see it in Ben. Addicts can be very charming until they get what they want. And then go chase the next dragon. Ben had no business chasing after Jennifer when he was still working on his sobriety. And even in the documentary he makes a correlation to his addiction and Jennifer’s need to attention and fame. If anything, he was making her his next addiction. Which addicts do with transfer addiction.

    • Chaine says:

      Yeah he always has had sack loser facial expressions and posture. He seems like a deeply unhappy and insecure person that seeks out stronger people as romantic partners hoping their joy and confidence will rub off on him.

      • Eurydice says:

        His face is his face. My father’s face was very fierce in repose, but he was a very peaceful man. I could look at JLo’s face and assume she’s a cold, narcissistic, entitled diva, but I don’t know that because I don’t know her.

  11. ML says:

    I feel like PageSix is rewriting history. 1. Ben made first contact with JLo via emails and love bombed her. 2. According to Ben, Vegas was his idea. 3. For someone who hates to be papped, he’s not really avoided the paparazzi in any of his relationships. Yes, he didn’t look entirely happy during Paris, but it’s ridiculous to say that he has less agency and responsibility in this relationship than her. If he’s been doing the work on himself, which started with his sober journey, then he’s absolutely aware of what he does need and how he should communicate effectively. And how he can also make whoever his partner is feel seen. JLo has a ton of issues, but this article is absolving Ben of his.

    • Oakley says:

      Being pap’d is okay, but actively participating in it is just too much, I’d imagine. Like when they were together, she always wanted to drag him around out in the public and then begging him to kiss her out in the open, fully knowing well that pap were taking their photos. It’s like she really wanted to create content for consumption.

  12. Libra says:

    Broken promises can sink a relationship quickly. I suspect they both made promises to each other that “this time it will be different”. The old problems were still there.

  13. Roo says:

    This feels like the same story he sold last time he quit the relationship – he’s the victim, he just wants normal, she is too much, she doesn’t know when to stop. Oh please. He’s a grown ass man and he abruptly decides to quit the relationship on the honeymoon? That’s not a good look for anyone, especially someone with children who are impacted by his marriage and eventual divorce. He’s too flakey to be in a relationship and no one thinks he’s a victim.

    • ShazBot says:

      Gwyneth Paltrow really nailed it when she said he makes life tough for himself. He’s always been like this, and it is sad for him because he’s clearly trying to sort things out with sobriety and such, but yeah, women need to beware.

  14. Amy Bee says:

    Yeah I believe he checked out very early in the marriage and long before JLo revealed his love letters.

  15. Mireille says:

    I don’t take anything Page 6 says with a grain of salt except BA has a paper trail of being a white man in Hollywood forever struggling with his sobriety (aww!!! we should feel sorry for him) and forever coddled by his ex-wives and the media (awww! everyone is taking care of him). At one point when does BA act like an adult and take responsibility and accountability for his choices, actions, and behaviors? He doesn’t like the paps? He loved up Ana with a media storm of photos to prove it. Now I am not a fan of JL because of her past history of being rude and dismissive to everyone from assistants to reporters to service staff, but she didn’t deserve the constant media backlash and ridicule of her failed marriage with the excessively problematic BA.

  16. Agnes says:

    Don’t they both look a couple of lions lazing in the sun in that yacht-butt shot? How Leo can you get. Buh-bye Bennifer. We all saw this coming.

  17. Aerie says:

    Ben is an addict. Ben love bombed her. Ben is a man child.

    The repetition is tedious.

  18. CLOVE says:

    He really is out here playing with women. First, he cheated on Jennifer Garner, and she continued to help him with his sobriety. I think it was a combination of things, and they should have just continued to date. Jlo should have listened to Jane Fonda and not put out that documentary.

    One question: Why is he on a boat with long sleeves and a T-shirt?

  19. Annemarie Musawale says:

    but him and Anna de armas used to be papped every day getting coffee and donuts so what’s the difference?

    • Oakley says:

      Even I can see the difference. Being pap’d is ok and out of his control. He and Garner had been pap’d when they were married. No big deal. But then you don’t see Garner or Ana de Armas actively participates in this paparazzi game by creating content for them on your own volition. They ignored them. But JLo is different. She revels in these sorts of game and actively courts them.

      • C says:

        If that’s the case why did he pursue her again? The crap people are throwing at her is so ridiculous at this point. He is a loser.

      • Oakley says:

        Perhaps he saw she changed? She did seem quieter when she was with A Rod. He probably think at that level, he could handle it. But when she hooked up with him again, it seems she just shifted a gear and notched up the publicity content.

      • C says:

        She has always been extra and he more than anyone else knows that. He was all in when her stuff was successful. He should never have been sliding back into her DM’s in the first place but he hates being alone as much as she does.

      • Oakley says:

        There is no place where he mentioned anything about he was ashamed of her projects. You are now putting words in his mouth.

      • February pisces says:

        I swear during his marriage to jlo, I’ve seen Ben papped with garner more than his actual wife.

  20. Flamingo says:

    Ben just wants to live a low-key life?? People generate stories based on information fed by PR teams. If it’s pro Ben that signal is to me Ben’s team or crisis team is feeding them the narrative. Next, I wouldn’t be surprised if goes on SNL for the upcoming season and start goofing on their marriage. Like he did the last time they split.

    And as Jennifer said in the documentary, that can apply to her and not just the character she was speaking to –

    She still got her beauty, her booty and her bank account… BYE BOY TO HIM!!!

    • Flamingo says:

      *ack* I meant Page Six not People. But People also does this. I wouldn’t be surprised if pro Ben stories start trickling out from them also.

      Also, I really, really, love that some well-crafted ‘conscious un-coupling’ PR statement didn’t come out first. She just did her business and is moving on.

    • Oakley says:

      You sound like JLo, to be honest, When I was studying Bennifer 2.0, I took a look at her songs’ lyrics and a lot of them sound like this.

      • Flamingo says:

        I wish I was J.Lo she is two years older than me. I look like the crypt keeper and she is still flawless. I would sell my soul for her abs.

        Also, let’s be honest it’s not like she is writing her songs. She has a team of writers that talk about general themes of love, loss, power that affect people on a universal level. It’s like a psychic that tell you, you lost a loved one to cancer. Like 99% of have lost a family member to cancer. It’s cold read.

  21. lucy2 says:

    Nah their issues started 20 years ago and never were worked on, just glossed over when he love bombed her again and she fell for it. Again.

  22. Trix says:

    He clearly has a profoundly addictive personality and once he kicked the booze and drugs, she became the replacement high. What an absolute dick to say he “came to his senses.”

    I so feel for her. The humiliation in addition to the pain she must be feeling. She really got played … AGAIN, by the same unworthy mess of a manchild.

  23. wolfmamma says:

    It didn’t work, period. Stop blaming Ben. Stop glorifying Jen. They tried. I give them both credit for that. We all know folk who try and try and it just doesn’t jell.

    Her sharing his love letters was a big uh oh for me ( who does that ?) but in the end it just points out their lack of harmony.

    Good luck to both of them on their respective paths, I say.

  24. Carolnr says:

    They could have kept where they were going on their honeymoon private. Someone tipped off the paps. Her entire entourage was with with them on their honeymoon! How crazy is that? It is your honeymoon, fgs! It was reported that her entourage lived with her & Marc Anthony, as well! Just my opinion, but I believe ( because she said she was cutting down on work & spending more time with family) that she told Ben the same thing. I think he believed that they were going to spend time this summer with her & his children. Then she announced that she was doing a Summer tour for most of the summer. I think she would have done the tour if it weren’t for low ticket sales.
    Bottom line, he couldn’t change her & she couldn’t change him. But why should you have to CHANGE someone to be compatible with them? They obviously are not your person…

    • molly says:

      I refuse to believe that in 2024 people are getting constantly paparazzied against their will. Far more famous celebs move relatively freely all over the world, all over the time.

  25. Phyllis says:

    JLo needs to find herself a Travis Kelce if she insists on a relationship again soon.

  26. TippyToes says:

    They are both adults and both to blame.
    They both have a long history of relationship issues . The failure of the relationship rests on both parties shoulders.

  27. Lilly says:

    I feel like he is using his sobriety as an excuse and throwing her under the bus. Because he got with Garner not too long after their first breakup and I think he spent years, or different periods, wondering ‘what if’?

    He quietly resented Garner (whether she deserved it or not) and resented the pressure of now having to play out in image and public and was probably ashamed or felt guilty for how he cowardly and shamefully treated Lopez.

    He let the media say all kinds of things about her and ran with the narrative that he was the trapped golden boy that got “away from the controlling, fame hungry and seductive Latina”.

    He has talked about how shame fuels self loathing and addiction. When things got hard in his first marriage he drank even more to deal with it.

    I think that’s he was TRYING to say when he was Howard Stern. People came to Garner’s defense and shamed him more.

    He felt guilty and shame because they’re friendly and she’s the mother of his kids, and he didn’t want his kids to see that but it was the truth.

    My point is that there were periods of his marriage were he was sober and unhappy and periods where he was not sober and unhappy and he still regretted how he treated Jennifer and left her in the lurch.

    He thought of her and kept gifts and letters both at sober and not sober times. He can’t admit the truth this moment but if they “failed” (and we shouldn’t view relationships as failures, per se) it’s not because of sobriety.

    He’s also like a see-saw…his new guilt was breaking up his OG family and he feels indebted to Garner and Garner enabled him, supported him, became his “bestie” as one news headline just said, so the Jennifer doc (and it not being a commercial success), the criticism over that Stern interview, the way ppl still praise and defend Garner, any issues he had with Lopez.

    He ran from having to work through it and waver the media attention.

    Started hanging out with Garner again and became passive aggressive.

    But he thought of Lopez during his 11-13 year marriage. He can’t take that back now. He reacts to the public and he and Garner and co-dependent to each other, not just co-parenting.

    And they both had a hand creating that system for ver the years, Jennifer knew they were in Japan together and then looking like a happy family in Connecticut, while he ignored her attempts to reconcile. No wonder she walked into that courthouse like she did.

    Garner just put out a press statement to People that she’s still with her boyfriend. Why did she react that way?

    She also seems to be in a place that although she’s co-dependent with Ben, she’s just smidge self-conscious that ppl notice or will notice.

    But you cant tell me that Ben didn’t know better and wasn’t pining for Lopez for ages. They have problems and he feels guilty about Garner and his family. He cant even be honest with himself and still makes excuses.

    • Gem says:

      I think Ben had practically stopped communicating with JLo, at least in a way that can open lines for proper reconciliation. I mean he has 3 kids with Jen Garner so its understandable he has good relationship with her maybe as mother of his children. They also dropped their eldest off to college. But I also believe JLo did react to the way he is with his ex and kids, compared it to probably how he is with her and decided to bury the carcass of their marriage. I feel bad for JLo. She has abandonment issues and she probably felt like she was left behind again, all over. I pray she gets some closure. I do think she tried her best to fix things from what we saw as opposed to Ben just walking out and washing his hands off the whole marriage.

  28. ravensdaughter says:

    They kept saying (from separate coasts) that it’s all about family.

    Their blended family was one consistent bright spot in all this.

    So, they need to both live by their words and approach this divorce as grown ups would and make sure to nurture the love between the kids…it’s the silver lining in all this…

  29. Hello Kitty says:

    This entire article can be summed up as: Ben Affleck has serious issues but he definitely wanted to have sex with JLo again, so he lovebombed her, and she was delusional enough to believe that this time around would be different so they rushed into marriage and now it’s ending as quickly as it began. The End.

  30. Brynne says:

    I’m so sick of hearing the refrain that her fame was a factor in their breakup and that she somehow embarrassed him. HE was the one who pursued her, HE made the choice to appear in her This Is Me…Now movie and collaborate with her on her movie/doc/album project? (There’s interviews from the director where he talks about how involved Ben was behind the scenes) And did everyone forget Ben’s own Dunkin Donuts Superbowl commercial that he wrote and featured JLo?

    He was “in a vulnerable state” going into Bennifer round 2? Gimme a break. He’s had multiple rehab stints and high profile relationships. Why are we infantilizing a GROWN ASS MAN?

  31. og bella says:

    They remind me of me and my last bf before I got married. We were on and off for 10 years. The chemistry was crazy amazing, but ultimately, we just wanted different things and that would always break us up.

    I am married over 20 years now. It was the right choice, but honestly? I don’t know how my body would react seeing Mr. Wrong again after all these years

  32. C says:

    He is a narcissist who is only dry not sober. He knows nothing of accountability.
    She is messy for a thousand reasons but she was minding her own business when he pursued her and was signing “not going anywhere” and crap like that.

  33. Lens says:

    She was desperate to change the narrative from jlo is being cheated on by her fiancé to she is having a perfectly marvelous reunion with what she is now calling the ‘love of her life’ and she is the one who changed the city she was living in to his in a mere few weeks so I don’t think she was just ‘minding her own business’ and had no part in their reunification. But if they had trouble finding anything to talk about during their honeymoon that says volumes about the fact that the relationship was in trouble before the marriage even started. I remember the long lens video of them having dinner on that honeymoon and she ended up leaving the table to ponder the beautiful vista of the lake by himself. I remember thinking hmmm…

    • Renee says:

      I think JLo believed the BS about the world tearing them apart that Ben told her the first time. They were incompatible from the beginning. But its easier to believe that something else ruined things for you. ARod and her were in relationship for years. She was hurt and instead of processing all that alone, she jumped back into that doomed romance plot. Ben had also kept in touch with her over the years in a way he shouldn’t have. I think she believed that they were each other’s one that got away. At least now she knows. He again checked out while she is going through a lot and It feels like he cut her off in a way that she finally gave up and filed the papers. I just hope she learns to take some time off for herself, try being happier alone. I don’t think Ben has peace in his life deep down but that’s on him and for him to figure out.

  34. Andrea says:

    I bet he is back on Raya..I actually would bet a large amount he is out there lurking for his next conquest to lovebomb..

    This man is one of those looking for his next fix–Jlo was fun for him especially during the pandemic until the honeymoon when the ick set in for him. He is and always will be chasing the next high and it only lasts so long, which is why he looks chronically miserable. Every woman from here on out remotely interested should realize he is a good time not a long time.

  35. therese says:

    I’m sorry to see them split. I believe they genuinely care for each other. I believe in the future they may always be friends. I know at the “great” age of 55 and 50 whatever some people think they would have learned their lessons, but some people were born mature, and some people are still working on it. It takes a lifetime. I wish them both the best: may they find what they need. I like how actor Simu Liu acted in Mexico when he jumped to protect JLo on stage when a reporter asked her if she was divorcing. It made him look good in contrast to all that was happening. Rather than wishing they both could find “true love”, I wish for them a quiet in the storm and the ability to love and value themselves and the ability to be happy in their own company.

  36. BQM says:

    They always say don’t make major life decisions—jobs, homes, relationships, etc—within your first year of sobriety. Had Ben waited until he was solidly sober maybe he wouldn’t have pursued her or maybe he would’ve been more emotionally prepared if he did. But I doubt he was ever in the right space and it’s a shame.

    I do think they love each other. And they definitely should’ve dated longer. Hell, date forever. There’s no need to get married. They’d both been there, done that.