Before we get too drunk, here’s an Oscars preview!

82nd Annual Academy Awards - Meet The Oscars New York

Since it’s crazy slow around here today, and since the Oscars are coming on Sunday, let’s do a little preview of the showbiz’s biggest night. So far, the Oscar presenter list is sounding good, with the following stars confirming: Gerard Butler, Jake Gyllenhaal, Miley Cyrus, Kristen Stewart, Bradley Cooper, Jason Bateman, Tom Ford, Robert Downey Jr, Queen Latifah, Matt Damon, Samuel L. Jackson, John Travolta, Chris Pine, Keanu Reeves, Charlize Theron, Jeff Bridges, Sandra Bullock, Barbra Streisand, Kathy Bates, Ryan Reynolds, Tina Fey, Steve Carrell, Quentin Tarantino, Ben Stiller, Zac Efron, Kate Winslet, Penelope Cruz, Channing Tatum. Sam Worthington and Sean Penn. Hmm… that’s some good man meat, but there’s still no Jude Law, Clive Owen or George Clooney (who is nominated), but it still sounds like there will be enough beefcake to ogle to my heart’s content.

Warner Brothers/InStyle Golden Globe Awards Party

As far as the actual nomination and my guesses for the winners, I’m only to talk about the big six. Most are pretty much shoo-ins, but I’ll list them anyway:

Best Supporting Actress: I think Mo’Nique has it sewn up, but there’s always one upset in the acting categories, and this year, there’s a slight possibility it could be in this category. Mo’Nique is up again Vera Farmiga, Anna Kendrick, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Penelope Cruz – and I don’t really have a second choice, honestly. I think it’s going to Mo’Nique.

41st NAACP Image Awards - Portraits

Best Supporting Actor: I would only be shocked if Christoph Waltz did not win. He was creepy and terrifying and hilarious and insane in Inglourious Basterds, and I think it’s cool that this obscure Austrian actor is sweeping every award. He’s up against Matt Damon, Woody Harrelson, Stanley Tucci and Chrisopher Plummer. My guess is that if this category is the “surprise” it would be for Plummer, as some kind of lifetime-achievement Oscar.

Oscar Nominee Luncheon 2010

Best Actress: Call me crazy, but I’m not positive Sandra Bullock has this one wrapped up. Her chances are very good to take home her first Oscar, but I think there’s a 1-in-4 chance Meryl Streep could get some love. Carey Mulligan, Helen Mirren and Gaby Sidibe are also nominated, but I don’t think any of them really has a chance.

15th Annual Critics' Choice Movie Awards - Show

Best Actor: Jeff Bridges. He’s got it. The only other one, maybe, who has like a 1-in-20 shot is Colin Firth. But it’s going to be Jeff Bridges.

Oscar Nominee Luncheon 2010

Best Director: I really think the Academy is going to recognize the first woman ever in this category, Kathryn Bigelow for The Hurt Locker. Not only did she do so much with such a small budget, but the Academy likes recognizing “the first…” And this year, Bigelow is the first woman to be the frontrunner for Director!

Oscar Nominee Luncheon 2010

Best Picture: I think Avatar will win the big one, but The Hurt Locker has a good shot too. I would be happy with either. I think it’s 50-50.

Now, just for fun, I’d like to list some things that don’t go on conventional “Oscar Preview” lists. Here‘s what I‘m expecting for Sunday:

*The red carpet is going to be crazy boring. Very few of the big fashion girls (Nicole Kidman, Marion Cotillard, Kate Hudson) are coming out and I’m expecting a sea of “safe” looks.

*Lots of dumb Avatar jokes. One of the worst things about a big movie that everyone has seen is that it becomes the reoccurring butt of jokes throughout the night. At some point, Steve Martin and/or Alec Baldwin will be blue, I’m sure.

*Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin will be funny and witty and debonair as Oscar hosts, but the ratings will still go down. This is because the majority of Americans don’t seem to care for funny and witty and debonair.

*Jeff Bridges will make me cry at some point, probably when he’s thanking his wife of 27 years.

*Mo’Nique will make me cry at some point, probably when she shows off her hairy legs.

*Christoph Waltz will accept his award by reciting some cryptic, strange half-poetry mantra-like speech.

*I’m hoping that Meryl will get a lot of face time, especially with Alec and Steve as hosts. I hope she’s sitting up front, and I hope the camera is on her a lot. I love Meryl.

*I will probably be too drunk to remember who won Best Picture.

drunk

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15 Responses to “Before we get too drunk, here’s an Oscars preview!”

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  1. Ursaline says:

    Love the drunk kitten. My husband is always sending me these things. You should try

    http://www.mycathatesyou.com/

    if you haven’t been there already.

  2. lucy2 says:

    I love the LOL Cats, and I’m in agreement with the whole post.
    I think it would be awesome for Kathryn Bieglow to win – about time a woman won that award, and to win it with a war movie AND while up against her ego bloated ex husband would just be extra cool.
    Hope Steve and Alec do well. I don’t expect a lot of surprise winners. And I’m already groaning at the thought of Avatar jokes.

  3. Trillion says:

    You are the Kaiser, Kaiser.

  4. Feebee says:

    The first pic of Oscar, with the lights reflecting in his face… makes him look like he has huge teeth.

    Looking forward to the Awards, hope Steve and Alec do well, for everyone’s sake and it isn’t too long.

  5. simplicity says:

    I’ll hope the feeling I have about Meryl getting the win is right.

    Jeff’s in for Crazy Heart. I loved Vera Famiga’s performance, a win would be a strech of my imagination.

    The kids will be happy, but I’ll hope Avatar doesn’t win, the script, the script, oh no not that script!

  6. Trillion says:

    I hope Inglorious wins for best script.

  7. Ron says:

    The ratings this year will be good. There is a huge, very popular movie nominated and more people watch because of that. Unless the host completely tanks, no one really cares as long as they do an efficient job.

  8. Rianna says:

    I think that Hurt Locker is going to be the big winner.
    And yeah… the blue people will be over the top. Ten bucks it will be Martin that will dress up like an avatar. Ugh.

  9. city says:

    I just love that pic of RDJ! I know Gerry is hot and everything, but I think RDJ still beats him in the hotness dept.

  10. Jazz says:

    @city – I agree 100%!!

    I’m hoping for wins for Meryl, Jeff and Kathryn Bigelow. I also hope Hans Zimmer wins for the Sherlock Holmes score.

    “The first pic of Oscar, with the lights reflecting in his face… makes him look like he has huge teeth.”

    I thought that too!

  11. Oscars 2010 says:

    I love Mo’Nique’s dress, but what about her arms? :-S I would have covered those, in rest she looks lovely!

    Good luck! 🙂

  12. Allison says:

    hahahha this is great. i agree that monique is a shoe in. and your guesses for the night are hilarious- and i bet all true!

  13. Wholesome1 says:

    Best Picture: Inglorious Basterds
    Best Director: Kathryn Bigelow
    Best Actor: Jeff Bridges
    Best Actress: Gabby Sidibe ties with Carey Mulligan
    Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz
    Best Supporting Actress: Mo’Nique

  14. Xena says:

    Does anybody else want Avatar to win best picture?

  15. Fluffy Kitten Tail says:

    Boring.