I have the motherload of Tina Fey interviews today, but don’t expect some kind of Sparkles-esque “I’m terrified of vaginas” type soundbyte. Tina doesn’t roll like that. She’s promoting her role in Date Night, which costars Steve Carell, and comes out this weekend, and she’s already done a cover interview in Esquire, a cover interview with Carell for Entertainment Weekly, and a big interview in The Daily Mail. There are just a few more quotes from the Esquire piece that I wanted to share. Regarding a possible Liz Lemon-Jack Donaghy hookup on 30 Rock, Tina says it’s not going to happen: “Okay, if we get to season 15, they’ll do it.” She also talked about her fondness for f-bombs, saying: “I really love cursing a lot… But as I get older, I realize it’s a little unseemly for women of a certain age. But once you pass 65, you can hit it full tilt again and it’s charming.” And she gives sage advice to young women embarking on a boob-exposing spring break: “They’re your boobs. At least have the sense to film it yourself and get the money from it.”

Next up, The Daily Mail’s piece. There’s lots of background about Fey, which is kind of boring (and if you’re a fan, you probably know it anyway). If you want to read the whole piece, go here. These are some of the highlights:

On being “indebted” to Sarah Palin: ‘You can grow up wanting to make movies or wanting to appear on SNL, but I don’t think anyone sits there dreaming, “Well, I hope there’s a politician out there who looks just like me so I can do impersonations of her!” It was weird because so much of what I’ve done has come out of sheer doggedness, and then this fell into my lap. It put me on the map with people who hadn’t seen 30 Rock or SNL, so what can I say? I’m indebted to her!’

On meeting Palin: ‘She was very pleasant,’ says Tina. ‘We talked about our kids and school, and her hair person helped our hair person alter my wig to make it look more accurate, and she also gave us tips on finding the right lipstick. She’s incredibly telegenic and likable, and she’s now beginning a successful career as a television commentator, so I think she’s doing OK.’

Did she hear from Obama? ‘No, I’ve not heard from him yet, and it’s not my place to talk politically. I speak only through sketch comedy, thankfully.’

On being boring: ‘My daily life consists of going to work or being at home,’ she says, ‘so when I do interviews I always forget to muster up some kind of personality. Two hours from now, I’ll be going, “I really should have tried to jazz that up a little.”’

On being a sex symbol: ‘I cannot do my hair, I cannot do my make-up, and anyone who knows me will tell you I’m the most bedraggled person they have ever seen,’ she says forlornly. ‘I have such a lack of skill in the womanly arts, it’s embarrassing. Well, let’s be honest – the thinking man wants to sleep with the same lady the dumb man does. They all want Jessica Simpson! But I’ll take those compliments for as long as I can because they won’t last for ever. I’ll save all the cuttings so that some day I can look through them.’

On her looks: ‘I’m glad I live in New York, because I think Hollywood would be tough. I mean, I go to the awards ceremonies and even though I’m not big [actually, she’s tiny] I’ll still be the heaviest person there. But that’s OK. My looks aren’t what I bring to the table.’

Tina on her husband, Jeff Richmond: He‘s ‘a Dudley Moore type, shorter than I am, with a very handsome face’, and says that ‘his kindness and his sense of humour were probably the main things that attracted me. I met him when I was 24 and we’ve been together ever since. I went on so few dates in my life before I was married – and certainly none as catastrophic as the one in Date Night – but it was kind of love at first sight for my husband and me. ‘It was very easy and affectionate from the beginning, and there was none of that no-calling-back or game-playing. We didn’t get married until I was 31, but we knew early on that it was something we wanted to do; it was just a matter of us living in the same city again. Jeff was in Chicago and I’d moved to New York [for SNL], but there was never any question about us being together: I was very lucky in that sense.’

On Lindsay Lohan, on her daughter, Alice, and whether she would encourage Alice to be an actress: ‘Knowing [Alice], I can’t imagine her doing anything else. She’s much more outgoing than I ever was as a child – I think she takes after my husband in that sense,’ she smiles. Would she discourage Alice from getting into the acting business at a young age, particularly given the downward spiral that Lindsay Lohan subsequently embarked upon? ‘Lindsay was 17 when she did [Mean Girls] and she was brilliant. But to have success and money at that age has got to be overwhelming. No one tells you “No”, and I definitely wouldn’t want that for my child. I’d try to make her do theatre first because you learn a real work ethic there, and we’d certainly try and make her wait until she’s done school. But Lindsay was a lovely girl,’ she adds, ‘very smart and very funny – and I hold out hope that we’ll see some really good work from her again.’

[From The Daily Mail]

And lastly, some selected quotes from Tina’s joint interview in this week’s Entertainment Weekly, with Steve Carell. It included their discussion of whether Liz Lemon and Michael Scott might actually be perfect for each other, and whether there will ever be a cross-over Office/30 Rock show:

Tina Fey on Steve Carell at Second City: Seventeen years ago she saw him at Second City, and she thought he was one of the “gods of improv”. She admits: “This whole time, it’s been very difficult for me to look directly at Steve or even approach him.”

Tina on wanting to do the film, and the story of Date Night: “[Steve and I] are both married, have been with our spouses for a long time, and have kids. I liked the idea of playing grown people out on this adventure. I definitely relate to the small details of the script, just how worn out and in a rut you can get when you’re married and working, with the kids.”

On doing on epically long kiss with Steve Carell: “I pitched [the idea]. Wouldn’t it be funny is the kiss was as long as the credit sequence? It was fun because we’re both so polite and not only are we both married, but we know each other’s spouses. It was the world’s longest closed-mouth kidd. It was like a tongueless turtle mouth.”

Tina on her “date nights” with her husband: “We don’t have scheduled ones, but it usually involves eating dinner at 11 o’clock at night within an eight block radius of my apartment. I don’t ever want to go out until I put my daughter to bed. And she seems like she knows it and she’ll drag it out! Then God forbid you need to take a shower before you go out. It’s gonna be 11:30.”

On the grueling schedule of network television: “TV is kind of grueling, but the writer-driven nature of it definitely appeals to me. I think the dream is the BBC, AMC model, where you can make 13 episodes a year. Then you can really get them exactly where you want them – and not have everyone be physically ill by the end of it. Obviously, there are worse and harder jobs in the world. It’s not coal-mining.”

What would happen is 30 Rock’s Liz Lemon and The Office’s Michael Scott when on a date?

Fey: Oh, Liz Lemon would f-ck it up. Michael Scott would probably be very open, but Liz would be sour and judgmental and she’d blow it.
Carell: Blow it? With Michael? I don’t think there’s anyway she would agree to go out with Michael Scott unless she had been tricked into it. I don’t think you go from Jon Hamm to Michael Scott. Michael should be so lucky.
Fey: We should just say, ‘That’s the series finale this year!’
Carell: “We’re planning a little cross-pollination. There’s a tornado, and we have to huddle between New York and Scranton.” No way.
Fey: It would be so bad. It’s not gonna happen.

[From Entertainment Weekly, print edition]

So, no cross-over shows, no Michael and Liz. Too bad. It probably would be a bad idea, but I wouldn’t hate the idea of Carell coming to guest star on 30 Rock as a completely new character. I love the men Fey gets on 30 Rock. They’re always nerdy/hot dream men, like Jon Hamm acting weird, or Jason Sudekis, or James Franco, or Liz’s current man (not really) Michael Sheen (who I love!). Carell would totally fit in there.