“Crazy Eyes”

Mel Gibson’s latest ex, baby-mama and golddigger Oksana Grigorieva, is in Russia to perform at some charity concert. To promote her gig, she gave a press conference to a Russian media outlets, and some quotes are now being picked up worldwide. Question: how good is Oksana’s English? Very good, right? I’ve read her print interviews before, and she does come across as very bright, and very fluent in English. So don’t use the “lost in translation” excuse when trying to understand what the f-ck Oksana is trying to say in this interview. Here’s the bizarre part – when asked about her split with Mel, Oksana says in part, “I can tell you that after three years of relationship we have split up – suddenly and recently. Unfortunately, I cannot give you the reason. But you will find out everything quite soon. Here is the official version: We split up by mutual consent…” What? Three years together? We’ll “find out everything quite soon”? Is there an unofficial reason for the split?!? Here’s more:

Mel Gibson’s ex-girlfriend and the mother of his eighth child – Russian pianist Oksana Grigorieva – will perform in Moscow to help raise money for the “Give a Life” charity.

The singer/songwriter has arrived in her homeland after 17 years of living overseas.

Grigorieva told the press-conference in Moscow that she “always wanted to help children by means of music” and to attract attention to sick children in Russia, Ukraine and Belarus.

When asked about her own emotional state after splitting up with Hollywood heartthrob Mel Gibson just several months after their daughter was born, Grigorieva made it clear she preferred not to comment on their recent break up.

“I am anxious to talk about children; it is more important for me than my relations with Mel. But if you want to know I can tell you that after three years of relationship we have split up – suddenly and recently. Unfortunately, I cannot give you the reason. But you will find out everything quite soon. Here is the official version: We split up by mutual consent and we will raise our daughter together. She is currently with my mother in my Los Angeles home.”

The charity event on April 20 will feature Gibson’s ex-girlfriend playing the piano and singing songs from her album.

“Mel himself has directed several video clips for my songs. He has written lyrics for two of my songs and has always greatly supported me. He also gave me an incredible opportunity to become a producer of my own album. It doesn’t happen a lot these days,” Grigorieva said regretfully.

[From Russia’s “Prime Time” media outlet]

So what are the unofficial reasons for the split? My guesses:

1. Because Mel would continuously get drunk and call Oksana “Sugart-ts”.
2. Because Mel would continuously get drunk and call the baby “Sugart-ts”.
3. Because of the Jews.
4. Because Oksana found a new sugar daddy who is less crazy.
5. Because Oksana found a new sugar daddy who is more sober.
6. Because the Mayor of Malibu doesn’t do relationships.
7. Because Oksana sounds like a drowning cat when she sings.

I have more but I fear I’ve already gone too far. Us Weekly also pointed out that Oksana confirmed she’s going to have a tattoo removed now that the relationship is over – the tattoo was a hammer and sickle, “which Gibson had suggested for her.” What? Since when is Mel into communist iconography? Jesus.