Sarah Jessica Parker and TMI go together like ice cream and sprinkles. Yes, the Sex and the City 2 press tour has begun, and it is already a buffet of wrongness. Since I’m going to pull from a lot of sources, let’s just do the highlights:

SJP on shooting in Morocco: “We didn’t even have a bathroom. There was literally no interruptions. Kristin Davis got sick. Apparently. If you’re very sick and have a very serious intestinal issue, you just need warm milk.”

SJP on the film shoot: “[It was] laborious and Herculean, but it was one of the greatest experiences of my professional life…To live and work with this cast and that crew every single day to see the sun rise and set over our locations in the most far flung places. To lie in a bed all day with these women exhausted and laughing. To be on a camel with Kim Cattrall, which disobeyed all orders.” [Editor’s note: Did the camel disobey orders, or did Kim Cattrall? I can’t tell.]

On whether Mr. Big is bad: “There is not a villainous move by any man in this movie. Any consequences are on a part of us and the choices [the women are] making and some momentary reckless behavior… It’s all us, and we come home, frankly, a little wiser.”

SJP on doing nudity: “You don’t want to see me topless. You really don’t.”

SJP on other people‘s nudity: “Maybe they’re more equipped to do so. And it’s all been voluntary. There was never any pressure. Never once. It’s too progressive of a community here to have anyone pressured into doing that.”

SJP on being nervous: “I’m excited. But this is also the period when I tend to be very nervous and I worry and I fret and overthink. I’m in a state of turmoil. I fret about everything. I worry that it’s not good enough. I worry that no one will show up…What if the audience isn’t happy?”

On the Photoshopped monstrosities during promotion: “It’s curious to me because everything’s Photoshopped now. I’m curious, because do they ask it about a Will Smith poster or a Tom Cruise poster?”

On letting her 7-year-old son watch SATC: “I’m not going to be able to keep him away much longer. If I can manage to take him out for popcorn for two certain moments, I think he’s ready for it. He has too many questions, and he’s too clever for us to keep it from him. I wouldn’t say this movie is for 7-year-olds, but we’ll find a way of figuring it out.”

On the twins: “This may be the very time to show it to them. They’ll just say, ‘Hi.’ That’s what they’re saying right now, ‘Hi.’ ”

When will SJP do theatre again? “As soon as my children are old enough to put themselves to bed. It’s very hard for me to be away at night. It’s hard to miss that time. They still like me. There’s going to be a point where they won’t want me anywhere near the house. That’s when I’ll come begging, ‘Please, please let me have some stage work.’ ”

On a third SATC movie: “Oh, dear god. I don’t feel entitled to have that conversation yet. Let’s see if anybody shows up on May 27.”

On beauty secrets: “I don’t have one. I feel old and tired! I have children I run round after, I try to walk as much as possible, and other than that I buy every cream possible. I love beautiful clothes and am privileged enough to have access to a lot of them, but they’re returned the next day. They’re not mine!”

On her kids: “Having my boy and now the twins, life is triply delightful. When I [used to] come to London, my first stop was Harvey Nichols, but now it’s all about Hamleys. That store is amazing! The girls couldn’t be more different. One is constantly looking around and reaching out, the other is very serious and slightly aloof.”

On the Carrie Bradshaw character: “I don’t feel like Carrie – my life is so different, my choices are different. But I love her. I love playing her and everything about her – the good, the flawed, the mistakes, the bad choices. I understand that people will blur the lines, but I feel very different. Which is probably why it works so well, because if she felt familiar to me, I would have bored of playing her a long time ago.”

[From E! News, Us Weekly & The Daily Mail]

Lord. That’s a lot of SJP for one day, isn’t it? And you know this sh-t is only going to get worse. SATC 2 doesn’t come out for another couple of weeks, and the way they’re doing the full-saturation promotion, you know that there will interview after interview of this stuff. Am I the only one who is really annoyed when SJP uses phrasing like “triply delightful” and “slightly aloof” to describe her children? Oh, and letting James Wilke watch Sex and the City? Yeah, that won’t disturb him. Of course, I’m still thinking about the television series – God knows, the new film is probably like a cartoon, with a cartoonish plot, so James might enjoy it.