So Elin Woods and Tiger Woods’ divorce has been finalized, and I’m sure there was a gigantic party/waitress gang-bang in Florida last night in celebration. Still, there is the post-game analysis, and it’s what you would expect. According to TMZ’s sources, Elin and Tiger didn’t even speak to each other as they sat in the Panama City courthouse for the final nail in their marriage’s coffin. Elin had eight lawyers with her! Goodness. As far as analyzing Elin’s current mood, sources are split. She’s either “so happy that it’s over” or “she’s devastated by everything that happened and filing the paper and making the divorce official brought home the reality of the situation and it hit her hard.” Also, Radar’s sources have Elin staying in Orlando, Florida, not Sweden. Apparently, she’s training for a triathlon in an attempt to lift this “heavy toll”. Long-term? Sources say: “The reality of her marriage ending hit her hard. She never thought she’d be in this position. She had no idea that Tiger was cheating on her the entire time she was married. She doesn’t talk to Tiger. They almost never come face to face anymore and when they do she doesn’t say a word. This is not a divorce where the parties are going to end up being friendly toward each other. There is still a lot of raw pain.”

As far as Tiger and my image of “the morning after” his divorce became final – an image of DD bras scattered on marble, wilting whipped cream, used condoms strewn about and empty Ambien bottles – well, no one is really paying attention to Tiger’s frame of mind. Except for Rachel Uchitel, his former mistress, and the chatty “events planner” whose indiscreet conversations to friends started the whole public parade of whores. Rachel stopped boning Jeremy London for two seconds to call up a friend and say that she wanted to get back with Tiger. The friend then promptly hung up on Rachel and called TMZ:

Rachel Uchitel has just told a very close friend … now that Tiger Woods is single, she wants him back and would “give up everything” to get him.

The friend — someone we know spoke to Rachel yesterday — tells TMZ Rachel said … “I feel horrible for him. He loved her. But he was in love with me. I hope he remembers that was real, and reaches out to me.”

Rachel added, “I’d give up everything to be with him again.”

Does that include the $10 million?

[From TMZ]

Call me crazy, but I don’t think Uchitel and Woods hooking up for real is the worst idea. They kind of deserve each other, right? And honestly, I do think Tiger “loved” Rachel. Or rather, I think she was his favorite mistress, or his favorite when the scandals started to break. I think she must have had the most dirt on him too – thus, the $10 million payoff and the threats Tiger’s people made to ensure that Rachel kept her mouth shut. There are even rumors floating around that Rachel and Tiger want to get married. To which I say, let them. It will be hilarious.