Howard Stern and his crew routinely take celebrity audiobooks and mix and match words and syllables to create rude and outrageous phrases that sort-of sound like they’re coming from the celebrity. The results are creatively stupid and often disgusting toilet humor, a fraction of which might pass as an actual sentence but most of which sounds outrageous and stilted. Howard and Robin present the phrases like they’re real and talk about how crazy it is that the person would be saying that, but it’s glaringly fake and it’s doubtful anyone believes it. Former Star Trek star George Takei has gone on the show when people are prank-called using mixes of his books. He’s laughed through it all good-naturedly, likening the results to raunchy audio Picassos.
One of the latest celebrities to be subjected to an audiobook sampling mix is 62 year old country legend Dolly Parton, and hers was definitely obnoxious and insulting. Phrases included:
God damn I love n*r cock
Kenny Rogers loves to piss inside little boys a*holes
Linda Rondstadt is a really fat tub of sh*t
Instead of trying to ignore it or saying that it was an obvious manipulation, Parton issued a statement that it really upset her and that she’s considering suing:
Dolly Parton has hit back against “The Howard Stern Show,” which last week manipulated recordings from one her audio books into seemingly racist and sexually graphic sound bites.
“I have never been so shocked, hurt and humiliated in all my life,” Parton says in a statement. “I cannot believe what Howard Stern has done to me. In a blue million years, I would never have such vulgar things come out of my mouth. They have done editing or some sort of trickery to make this horrible, horrible thing. Please accept my apology for them and certainly know I had nothing to do with this.”
“If there was ever going to be a lawsuit, it’s going to be over this,” she continued. “Just wanted you to know that I am completely devastated by this.”
[From Billboard.com via Gossip Rocks]
The phrases attributed to Parton involved the n word and pedophilia so you can see how she would get extremely upset about it. I listened to a bunch of these mixups, they’re below, and some were definitely funny but they went too far in many cases. That’s pretty much expected for Howard Stern, but you can’t blame Parton for saying that it’s way out of line and that she’s really hurt by it.
When I heard this I thought that Parton might have a new book out from which they’re sampling, but her biography Dolly: My Life and Other Unfinished Business
Here are some clips from the Howard Stern show in which they do these audiobook mixes – warning on all of these. Don’t listen if you have kids around or are at work without headphones, they’re raunchy.
Dolly Parton Audiobook Mashup
Ed McMahon audiobook
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George Takei “calls” a self-professed Hillbilly
ytaudio(XLsPlDjQCNA)
George Takei Deli Prank
ytaudio(k80Se6kryPU)
Nasty Oprah Audiobook, featuring George Takei in the studio
ytaudio(XLsPlDjQCNA)
Dolly Parton is shown on 5/1/08 on her way to play Radio City Music Hall, thanks to WENN.
I gotta go with Dolly on this one. She would probably accept an apology from Howard too. If he said something like “it was a joke, Dolly never said anything like that and I’m sorry it hurt her feelings” Dolly would probably just leave it alone. We’ll just have to wait and see.
A+ to dolly’s most recent face lift/plastic surgeon
she looks great in the top picture
(her hair and makeup still need work)
Dolly is such a nice and sweet lady from everything I’ve read about her. I loved her in 9 to 5! I hope Howard appologizes.
I LOVE both of them, so I don’t know where I stand on this one.
As a broadcaster, I think I have to side with Howard. When you become a celebrity, you’re fair game because you open your life to the world. You can’t expect to just sit back and live a cushy life… reaping in the money for something many people do for free. I;m talking about ALL celebs here. They want the perks but not the downside.
SHE recorded the book and welcomed people into her life by doing it. LOVE YOU THOUGH, DOLLY!!
Dolly has always seemed to be a forgiving sort, and I agree that she’d probably accept an apology. But those are really bad, and she’s a southern lady of some few years, and probably was really hurt and offended. I know I would be, too.
If she has a case, sue the h out of him.
If she doesn’t, just leave it all alone, like a lady.
I don’t blame her for being upset really – she seems like a very nice genuine person, and some of those really did overstep the mark by quite a way.
How does that tiny woman stay upright ? She must have spine made of steel !
Yikes….some of that made me blush. I’m not going to lie, I did laugh a bit.
The fact that shes worried that her fans will be unable to figure out it was fake says more about her view of her fans. “Bunch of morons cant tell its fake? I just wanted you all to know!”
I know many, many people who have worked with Dolly, and she really and truly is a sincerely sweet lady. Literally everybody loves her, hands down. She’s never an asshole or a bitch, EVER.
She’s never been so humiliated? I guess she never saw RHINESTONE or STRAIGHT TALK.
Who would pick on sweet Dolly Parton?
Steel Magnolias was on a couple of nights ago.
her fans dont listen to howard. and anyone that does listen to howard, KNOWS its a joke. Shut the fuck up dolly, its a joke. you didnt get it. end of story.
Waste those lawyer fees helping something a little more worthy of this much press.
Let it go Dolly! If there’s one thing you should know about Howard, don’t piss him off. Look what he did to Bon Jovi back in the day…
Any reference to the abuse of children cannot be considered “a joke” by anyone sane. That demonic “host” should not even be free to walk around outside the walls of a psychiatric ward, much less to broadcast such soulless, atavistic dreck.
Okay, if you think Howard is crazy for allowing this to be broadcast, you are an idiot. Howard Stern was the highest rated in the U.S. when he was on regular radio, and he IS the highest on satellite radio. The number speak for them selfs. It is funny. If you think its offensive you are just a hag with no sence of humor. Learn to take a joke and get with reality. Put your bible down and laugh a little.
Guess Dolly can’t take a joke, like the one she played on employees of her DIXIE STAMPEDE show-restaurant in Orlando. Haven’t heard? She dumped them all out in the street with a few weeks pay (required by law), telling them the place wasn’t making money. Then she and her investors sold the land for a BUNDLE.
Howard Stern is evil, demonic, and on his way to spend eternity finding out that there really is a hell and there really is a God. Dolly Parton knows God and it is evident in her life. To repeatedly use God’s name in vain and refer to such obominations as sodomy with a child proves beyond a doubt that Howard Stern is satanic and will stop at nothing to blaspheme the name of God. One day he WILL bow before the Almighty God and receive the punishment he deserves if he continues the life he now leads. I pray for his soul and for the lives he has destroyed. 😥
She has full right to do that what if someone took your words you used for your life story and used them in an offensive manor the only reason why sh*t face stern is popular is because he makes people gasp that’s what shock jocks do but that doesn’t make it better especially if he knew what a sensitive person she was
Personally, I don’t think Stern is funny, but that’s just my opinion. I know a lot of people out there like him. I guess he’s kind of like Jerry Springer to me. If you like that sort of crap more power to you. As for Dolly, I love her. She seems like a truly nice lady, but forget the lawsuit. Shrug, disown it, and ignore him. Stern only does things to get attention. It’s really not worth it. Call him on something and he’ll go on about it FOREVER … like that kid in elementary school you couldn’t stand … lol
Where exactly is it written that just because you are an entertainer that your life is laid open for everyone to partake…What a bunch of crap.
As for those who have written for Dolly to shut up and take it, or that she has a low opinion of her fans..why don’t you shut up, you obviously don’t know a thing about her.
Clearly she has more integrity and moral turpitude then you were raised with.
Bottom line Howard Stern is a jerk, and knows nothing about human decency, him and his sidekick Robin.
Dolly has given more back then any performer before her. From cultivating her hometown and beyond to literacy programs, domestic and internationally. That is why she was awarded the LIVING LEGEND AWARD from the Library of Congress
As far as Dixie Stampede in Orlando, Get your facts straight. Dolly is a Living Legend and a model of decency and greatness.
Paul S
wow awesome face work, rock on
But seriously, who doesn’t love nig*r cock? Good for Dolly for admitting it outright and proud! 🙂 YOU GO GIRL!
Well ive got news for you all ! Yaw need to leave dolly the hell alone. SHe is a very sweet gorgeous lady and always has been. Howard would be Pissed if dolly went and recorded something like that about him now wouldn’t he . Well if you side with Howard sterns and his ugly @$$ huge nose then go ahead but I love Dolly and you’ll never find another person as sweet and as nice as Dolly !
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