Piers Morgan has a new show on CNN in which he’s taking over for finally retired Larry King. The show premieres on January 17th. Morgan told ET’s Billy Bush that Madonna is banned from appearing on his show and that she’d have to kiss his ass to ever come on. He was initially vague when Bush asked him what Madonna had done to offend him, simply saying “she knows what she’s done,” but then elaborated to include an itemized list of the long history of wrongs Madonna has committed against him, the worst of which was lying about her pregnancy when he was the editor of the Daily Mirror and offering his competitor the exclusive story.

The way she could come back is to literally get on bended knee… somewhere like Times Square on national television and beg me for forgiveness.

There was a breadroll throwing incident in the mid 90s. There was an incident at a hotel in the South of France at the Cannes film festival involving a photographer and a bodyguard. An incident involving a pub owned by her recently departed husband Guy Ritchie where my brother was the manager. You know the worse thing Madonna did to me? Madonna’s publicist once said to me ‘Listen to me, Madonna is not pregnant’ when I was running a newspaper. I said ‘are you sure?…’

Next day, they announced it on the rival newspaper’s website.

[From video on Access Hollywood]

I don’t know much about Morgan but the interview really endeared me to him. The guy is awesome and I love that he holds grudges and will tell you about them! He also calls Madonna “boring and annoying” according to Bush.

Morgan’s first guest will be the allmighty Oprah. He doesn’t need Madonna or anyone else who pissed him off, and I would suspect that there are quite a few other people.

I guess this is Piers Morgan’s wife, Celia. Damn!