The National Enquirer has one of the more interesting “Brangelina Fighting Constantly, Empress Zahara Calls Her Attorneys” stories that I’ve seen in a while. Instead of making it about other women or exes or costars or tell-all books or bejeweled cardboard swords for Shiloh, or even gerbils of doom, The Enquirer claims that Brad and Angelina are fighting about something incredibly relatable: money. Now, Brad and Angelina are two of the highest paid stars in Hollywood, and even if they each do only one film a year, that’s more than most of us will see in a lifetime, times 20. But, apparently their lifestyle choices (chateaus, endless renovations, nannies, security, gerbils, etc) are an enormous cash-suck. Which… I’ll believe. I’ll also buy that Brad and Angelina might have let some of their staff go. What I don’t buy is that Brad is the one who thinks they should pinching pennies – between the two of them, Brad seems like the one who blows his millions of dollars on art and toys and endless, multi-continent home renovations. Here’s the Enquirer’s take:

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are fighting over money – and it has led to their most vicious blowup ever! Pals say things got so heated between the battling couple that Brad walked out on Angie, screaming “I can’t take anymore! You’re breaking us up!” before flying to France in a rage.

“Right now Brad and Angie’s love affair is hanging by a thread,” says an insider.

With mounting debts and crushing overheads to fund their lavish lifestyle, Brad is “demanding that they reduce household staff, scale back on travel, artwork, expensive wine, buying up the most buzzed about scripts and books in Hollywood, and rein in their charitable donations,” said the insider.

While their combined net worth is around $250 million, another source maintains, “they’re spending more than they’re bringing in.”

“Brad recently fired one of his most trusted employees as well as the children’s French tutor, telling them, ‘I can’t afford you anymore.’ It’s hard to believe two fo the biggest movie stars in the world need to pinch pennies, but they are facing some harsh financial realities just like millions of other families all across America.”

They allegedly travel with six nannies, three security guards, a private chef, and a small army of doctors, nurses and up until recently, tutors. They also maintain houses in Malibu, New Orleans, Missouri, Cambodia and the $60 million French chateau. And they’re building a ranch in Namibia!

They were considering adding a $40 million Italian villa, but “Brad nixed that, and he’s overseeing renovations on the French property to possibly prepare it for sale.”

An insider says World War III erupted when Brad told Angelina they would have to cut costs: “When Brad warned Angie about money, she called him selfish and petty.” She threw in Brad’s face his plans to go on a lavish VIP trip to Dallas for the SuperBowl. “he was livid about that…[and it became] the fight to end all fights.”

After the fight, Brad stormed out and flew to France, to their Chateau Miraval, which he’s threatening to sell. “Brad thinks he could sell the chateau for a big profit, which would help their cash flow.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition]

I should mention that in other tabloid coverage of Brad’s trip to Chateau Miraval, other sources described it as an act of love, that Brad is overseeing some renovations so that Angelina’s favorite home will be just perfect. Whatever – Brad’s a total property slut. He loves buying property and renovating it again and again through the years. It’s his hobby. And it’s an expensive and time-consuming hobby, but it makes him happy.

Anyway, I just thought the story was interesting because I often wonder how many people are full-time staffers of the Jolie-Pitt household, and how much all of it costs. Let’s just go with the basics: I think the J-Ps have a lot of security, and their bodyguard bills probably reach into the seven figures annually (IMO). They have… maybe four or five specialty tutors for the kids, but do they even work full-time? And then Angelina has one assistant that I know of, and Brad has… God knows. Plus, staff at every home, right? So, yeah, they’re employing a hell of a lot of people. Ridiculous.

One last thing – The Daily Beast sent us this explicit denial from Angelina’s representative in Washington (?). Apparently, the British papers were reporting that Angelina was trying to adopt a 4-year-old girl from Haiti. Angelina’s rep Adam Waldman tells The Daily Beast: “Earlier this week, the Daily Mirror U.K. and others reported that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are in the process of adopting a child from Haiti…There is no truth to these rumors. Rather, Ms. Jolie is focused on enhancing the welfare and legal protection of children within Haiti. As such, she has been meeting with government of Haiti officials, Haitian legal experts and non-governmental organizations regarding a new initiative of the Jolie-Pitt Foundation. The recently launched Jolie Legal Fellows Program will assist the justice system in Haiti to improve child protection.”

Photos courtesy of WENN.