I kind of like how Pippa Middleton has been going back to her old uptradey ways. I missed talking about her, quite honestly. Even though Pippa is definitely a trainwreck, I kind of root for her because I think it must be hard for her to be the younger sister, the “less than” sister to her “more than” duchess sister. And I like that Pippa at least TRIED (and spectacularly failed) to launch her own career as some kind of party-planning book writer. Her book, Celebrate, was simply awful and it bombed in America and the UK, and likely “mortified” Pippa’s royal connections. Not only that, but Pippa’s publishing failure also made her publishers look awful because Pippa refused to go on a book tour and promote the damn thing, and as it turns out, she probably wasn’t contractually obligated to do so (which is a contractual failure by the publisher). So this news makes sense:

After her foray into publishing with Celebrate — her less than riveting guide to entertaining, which failed to feature in any bestseller lists — I can reveal that Pippa Middleton has parted company with her agent.

Literary guru David Godwin masterminded the deal with Penguin that saw the Duchess of Cambridge’s younger sister pocket an estimated £400,000 advance from publisher Michael Joseph. But the book of party planning tips will be their only collaboration.

‘Theirs was a tricky relationship,’ says a literary figure. ‘David was not an obvious choice for Pippa. His writers are heavyweights while Pippa’s niche is fluffy and commercial. In the end it was clear the union was not a happy one.’

At the time it was thought that Pippa’s contributions to the Party Times newsletter, part of her family’s Party Pieces mail order firm, plus her experience as a party planner for London company Table Talk, were sufficient credentials. Under Godwin’s expert guidance, she set out to style herself as the go-to party planning expert. But she failed to impress observers astounded that someone without real writing experience had managed to secure such a substantial offer.

Insiders were more baffled as to why she was being represented by an agent whose stable includes highbrow writers such as biographer Claire Tomalin, novelist Vikram Seth and historian William Dalrymple. In the end, despite Godwin’s expertise, Pippa’s guide was a flop. Poor sales followed and Penguin quickly denied suggestions that their involvement with Pippa was anything more than a one- book deal. And the unlikely partnership, which at first had proved so financially fruitful, is over.

Speaking from his Covent Garden office, David Godwin tells me carefully: ‘I am very sorry it has happened, but yes, it is true: I no longer represent Pippa and I wish her every good luck.’

So what of Pippa’s literary future? A month ago, Waitrose signed her up to write a column. But apart from joking herself that she should write a sequel entitled Bottoms Up — a reference to the attention her shapely behind attracts — whispers of a second tome about weddings appear to have been shelved.

[From The Mail]

The agent can “carefully word” his statements all he wants – he was the dummy who got a Middleton a pile of cash and prayed that her idiotic Pippa Tips would be a resounding success with little to no promotion. I guess we’re supposed to assume that the split was mutual, that Pippa realized that she’s not some amazing writer and that the agent begrudgingly let her go. But I think it went more like the agent getting reamed by his bosses and by the publishing houses he works with for wasting all that money and Pippa was all, “What? You’re not going to give me hundreds of thousands of dollars to dispense advice like ‘If you’re going to have a party, you will need to invite partygoers’?”

But as I said, Pippa is going back to her old uptradey ways. She’s back to “writing” a column for Waitrose’s monthly magazine and she’s got a new wealthy boyfriend, Nico Jackson, but she’s still hanging out with other wealthy suitors in between vacations with Nico. According to UK sources, Pippa “is totally smitten with Nico. I think they’ve already chatted about moving in together. She loves the fact that the whole fame thing doesn’t bother him and he’s already had the seal of approval from her family, including Kate and Wills.”

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.