Is it wrong to want to bang Mandy Patinkin? If it’s wrong, I don’t want to be right. Mandy plays Saul, the “moral center” of Homeland, and to promote Homeland’s third season (it starts one month from now), Mandy gave a lengthy interview to the New York Times. I’ve followed Mandy’s career casually for years, but mostly my interest in him has been about his work, not his attitude or personality or anything like that. I’d heard the occasional story that he used to be (and perhaps still was) an a—hole, but I never knew what was true. Mandy says in this interview that pretty much every bad story you’ve ever heard about him was true. And at the age of 60, he seems to have things mostly figured out, and I buy that he’s not an a—hole anymore. You can read the full NYT piece here, and here are some highlights:

Basic info: His 33-year marriage to the actress Kathryn Grody is a happy one and he talks lovingly of his sons, Isaac, 31, and Gideon, 27. But he has been open through the years about his depression, his attempts at therapy and his bad experiences treating his symptoms with medication, which he no longer takes. (Before a Broadway concert in 2002, Patinkin ingested so many Klonopin, under a doctor’s supervision, that he went blank 20 minutes in and had to start over.) He has also spoken freely about surviving prostate cancer at 52, the same age his father was when he died of pancreatic cancer. And he is a passionate advocate for organ donation, having received two corneal transplants to combat keratoconus, a degenerative disease.

To play Saul Berenson, he met with a former C.I.A. agent & his two grown daughters: “What I’m interested in is an emotional system. When were you afraid? Why? Did you pray? Shake? Sweat? The way I like to work is to attach personal experiences to what I’m doing, so it helps tremendously if I can write my own play under what the writer has written. Saul’s heart is in his head. He dreams for the greater good of the world. Saul is now 60 years old, as I am, and he has had a full life in his business, as I have, and he doesn’t know how long he gets to be around, as I don’t. He recognizes the gift of youth personified by his child in this piece, who is Carrie. He believes that both the savantlike and intellectual qualities of Carrie’s nature are the greatest single hope for humanity. He believes so deeply in her possibilities.”

When his father got cancer, the family lied to his dad: “Cancer was a death sentence then… I’m instructed to follow these orders, so I’m never able to talk the truth to my father at the end.” Patinkin grew teary. “He did his own research and was clearly cognizant of the fact that none of the pieces fit. It just destroyed me. I was forced to lie to my father by doctors and relatives. I made that choice and agreed with them, and I will never, ever get over it. If I hear a lie in my life with my children, with my wife, my work, my audiences, I want to annihilate myself, vaporize myself and wipe myself off the face of the earth.” He mopped the sweat from his face. “Never again will I subject myself to not trying my damnedest to tell the truth. That’s my gift and my curse.”

He always thought directors were criticizing him (when they were just directing him): “I struggled with letting in other people’s opinions. During ‘Chicago Hope,’ I never let directors talk to me, because I was so spoiled. I started off with people like Milos Forman, Sidney Lumet, James Lapine, unbelievably gifted people. So there I was saying, ‘Don’t talk to me, I don’t want your opinion.’ I behaved abominably. I don’t care if my work was good or if I got an award for it. I’m not proud of how I was then, and it pained me.”

Being fired and replaced with Jack Nicholson: Perhaps the biggest humiliation of Patinkin’s career was being fired by Mike Nichols from the movie “Heartburn” and being replaced by Jack Nicholson. “I didn’t listen to myself. I listened to all the relatives who said: ‘Yes, you win Tony awards, but how’s the movie career going? Are you a big movie star yet?’ I was in ‘Sunday in the Park,’ I was having this extraordinary life with Joe Papp in the Public Theater, but nothing was O.K., because I wasn’t a big movie star yet. I’m ambivalent about doing ‘Heartburn,’ but my agent, Sam Cohn, pushes Mike Nichols to hire me… We got to the first shot… Meryl and I were in the window playing the scene, and I remember Mike said, ‘Just try to imagine a golf ball running down your leg,’ to try to get me to lighten up and laugh…and the next day I was fired. I thought my life was over. They hired Jack Nicholson, who they wanted from the beginning.”

Walking away from Criminal Minds: “It wasn’t the right fit,” he said. “I made a choice I didn’t want to make. I pushed myself, thinking I needed more fame, more economic security. One of the greatest gifts that ‘Homeland’ has given me is it’s affirming on a daily basis. I’m always with the script, walking around with this stuff 24/7, so my head’s in a good place. The role is about listening, and when you don’t listen to yourself, you get in trouble. I wasn’t listening to myself in ‘Heartburn,’ I listened to the parental figure of Sam and the culture at large saying, ‘You’ve got to be in a movie, this is going to make you,’ and it wasn’t who I was. Yes, I did ‘Yentl’ and ‘Dick Tracy,’ but I felt, and I still feel a little bit today that I’m really not successful, because I didn’t become a movie star. The irony is half of those movie stars are all trying to be in television shows like this.”

What he’s learned: “If you ask me, ‘You’re 60, what’s one of the best things you’ve picked up?’ Two things I would say. One is stop trying to be Superman. Allow yourself to make mistakes and serve the team. I spent so many of my younger days thinking it had to be about me, you had to hear me, you had to see me. The other thing is, and it’s a double-edged sword because I live to work, I love it, is that all my life, no matter what happened, I wanted to capitalize on it, turn it into something to move me forward, make my career better. Where do I need to go? As opposed to ‘Are you even for one second where you are? Are you seeing anything you’re doing?’ I don’t want this moment to end. I don’t want this day to end. I was tired yesterday, I didn’t want it to end. I want every joy of every day and every struggle of every day. I always say to Kathryn: ‘How could I not know some of these things when I was younger? I see other people who are younger, and they get certain opportunities, and they don’t struggle.’ And she goes back to a standard phrase in our family, which is ‘Comparison leads to violence.’ ”

[From The New York Times]

The Times piece has lots of quotes from some of the directors and producers whom Mandy has pissed off over the years, but what’s interesting is that none of them seem to hold a grudge. It’s like, at this point you know what you’re getting. He’s a brilliant actor, a brilliant talent, but there is something… dark. I’m struggling for the right word… there’s something intellectually antagonistic about him. That being said, I love him and I love Saul and I don’t know what I would do without them. I love the way he talks about his “child,” his Carrie. Amazing.

Photos courtesy of WENN.