I sometimes worry that I’m too unemotional. I’ve been accused of talking, writing, thinking and acting “like a man” many times before, which I’ve always taken as someone else’s observation that I’m not into the frilly, touchy-feely stuff of life. I have a low tolerance for pillow-weepers, for one. Unless it’s Lloyd Dobler, I’m not really interested in man-tears, especially after (or during) sex. Incidentally, that was one of the worst parts of the Fifty Shades of Grey book – after every sex act, it felt like Ana Steele started weeping. STOP CRYING. I don’t even like men who have that “pillow-weeper look” which can basically be summed up as: Jim Sturgess.
So, maybe that’s why I’ve never been into Ryan Gosling. Maybe somewhere, in the deepest recesses of my mind, I realized that Gosling is what I hate/fear the most: a guy who cries after sex. At least that’s what one “source” tells Star Magazine in their cover story this week, which is all about normal, non-celebrity people who have dated celebrities. The Gosling story is one of the best!
Ryan Gosling brought movie fans to tears in The Notebook. But on one date, it was Ryan who turned on the waterworks.
“He was the best lover I’ve ever had,” recalls a curvy blonde, who shared a night of passion with Ryan after meeting him at a nightclub. But once the lovemaking was over, things took a turn.
“I thought I heard him sniffling,” she says. “Then I realized he had tears gushing down his face. I asked if he was all right, and he said he gets emotional sometimes.”
[From Star Magazine, print edition]
I’m not completely heartless. If you’re in a committed, loving relationship, I could see how a dude crying after sex would be a good thing, a sign of true emotional maturity. But this was a one night stand!!! Is this really who Ryan is in real life? Is he the guy who cries after hot sex with a random club girl?
Photos courtesy of WENN.
That’s funny. What about Jim Sturgess?
Aaaaaah, the sweet, sweet ways of (immature/unrequited) family life have begun on Gos-dez!!
I don’t believe this.
I don’t believe this at all but it is HILARIOUS. I want it to be true because…it’s awesome.
Also, the ultimate pillow weeper is Kit Harrington.
Ha! I can SEE it!
I have been known to cry after orgasm. It’s so stupid too. It’s like for no real reason at all it just bursts out. I guess I would call it a joy cry or maybe a guilty cry… like oh no my dead grandpa just watched me queef!
But mostly it’s all of these emotions about nothing built up that explodes at a very inconvenient moment.
Oh, God, yes. Afer the epiphany I just had of being a MAJOR sucker for the pillow weeper look (though NOT the personality), my obsession over Jon Snow, his puppy brown eyes, and the way the northern winds gently caress his black locks makes total sense.
I call BS on this story. No doubt in my mind this blonde made some fast coin selling her fiction to Star. And now she’ll probably use this story on every social or sexual occasion because somehow it seems to have been validated in print, so it *must be true,* and it makes her sound like the world’s hottest lay.
At first glance of the headline, I thought it was recent, and that he probably cried because he had to go home to his baby mama!
I call it BS.
This. There is no way. I find it very hard to believe.
lol does it ever really happen? so weird
I’m with you lana86. I’ve never heard of anyone ever, doing this and I find it really hard to believe!?
It can happen. It never happened to myself or a partner of mine, but for some people apparently the hormones go crazy after climax. It’s like you crash from a high. Or having PMS or something.
Still don’t believe the story lol.
I don’t know about men, but certainly I have cried – hysterically – after orgasm on one or two occasions. It has nothing to do with hormones, it’s just an uncontrollable outburst after a powerful release. (And I am not weepy AT ALL otherwise.)
Not that I necessarily believe this story. 🙂
Total BS story.
Yeah, but this bulls**t is so funny!
total bs, but for the lulz im gonna chose to ignore that its bs
It sounds just a little too much like what someone would say about Ryan Gosling based only on his public image.
I have never thought of Ryan as someone who cries after sex.Damn it.
LOL. I have always thought of him as a cryer, during and after sex so I totally believe this.
Awww, man…I just lost my lady boner if this is true. No more Hey, Girl for me.
I think I’ll go cry into my heirloom roses that Gos will no longer be around to water for me. Wah.
Maybe he was regretting it? Anyway, I can’t stand looking at him…he looks like my ex-boyfriend’s sociopathic son, especially when I see him in action.
I. Hate. This. Guy!!
No. No crying after sex. I’m also a heartless b!tch, er… emotionally removed? stoic? ice cold? Whatever. The worst for me is men crying at their own weddings. Ugh. I’ve been to some where the guy can barely complete his vows. Too much for me.
I was at a wedding a while back and the groom cried at the vows. Then again at the first dance, and again when cutting the cake. I hurt myself cringing, I am truly stoic too.
LOL on hurting yourself cringing! I’m going to remember that!
My first husband was a drunk. Sometimes it went mean, and sometimes he was a sobber. Incoherently sobbing and sobbing, heaving chest, snot, the whole none yards, sometimes in public. Once, he picked me up at the airport, just crying so hard I thought somebody had died, and when I finally got him to tell me what was wrong, this was it – a little girl came off the plane accompanied by the flight attendant. The little girl’s mother said “what do you say?” And the little girl said, “thank you.” That was it. That was what he was f*ing crying about. So, even though I’m an emotional person, and another person crying for a real reason usually makes me cry, too, a man, or for that matter a woman, crying for no apparent reason or a stupid reason leaves me cold.
I hope you took the wheel and didn’t let him drive. Wow. I’m glad he’s an ex husband, Goodnames.
As to Ryan–my first thought was, “Maybe he cried because his pee-pee was burning and it finally occurred to him (too late) that he should have wrapped it first” but that’s because I’m mean.
🙂
@GoodNamesAllTaken: Sounds like we were married to the same man. My ex-husband would sit on the couch in a drunken stupor and hold a picture of him with his daughter and stare at it and weep…because “he just loved her so much” and “missed her so much.” Nothing tragic had happened to her, she was asleep down the hall. Weep on, ridiculous drunk man.
Wow, Goodnames, just….wow.
It is SO awkward when men cry. I’m sorry. It doesn’t mean that I don’t feel empathetic but inside I’m screaming for them to please stop.
Your alls stories on here about your ex husband’s crying for ridiculous reasons had me in years of laughter on the train. Too funny.
Oh gosh, these stories about men crying for small reasons are just so funny. (Although I very well understand it was cringeworthy & not funny at all to witness those things!)
The majority of my co-workers are female and I’ve always wanted to burst into tears at a staff meeting because I know it’d freak them fck out. It’d be hilarious.
That story had me laughing so hard, I CRIED! But I am not in bed, so am I still good? BTW, men who cry in bed would be such a turnoff….thank goodness, I have never experienced that.
Marmaduke, I’m crying with laughter over, “Weep on, ridiculous drunk man.”
Gnatty
I sometimes have to tell Mr. snark to dry his ladyface.
Marmaduke
You have me in stitches.
Chris
Do it!
Whoa. That would be so weird to me. I mean, I’m fine with men crying, but in those circumstances, I would be thinking “was it that bad? That good? Do you miss your girlfriend? Your mommy? Did I accidentally hit your nuts? What?”
Btw, she’s a jerk for revealing that.
haha!!
LOL too funny +1
LOL. I think this story is complete and utter bullshit. Remember: Star.
It sounds like she fabricated something based on the fictitious “Hey Girl” sensitive Ryan Gosling sh*t.
Yup.
I’m going with tears of regret; of salty disappointment.
Dying here!
I would have pegged Orlando Bloom as a post-coital weeper (probably as he stares deeply into your eyes/soul and tells you what a beautiful, life-affirming experience it was to join your bodies or whatever), but Gosling always seemed more like someone who’d maybe get you some fair trade coffee and a bagel with locally sourced cream cheese the next morning.
Hehe. I think you’re probably spot on about both of them, fair trade coffee and all. Lol!
Ha…this^^^!
Funny. I always thought Bloom would be a giant dick and ask if he could leave 30 seconds after.
Bloom just screams “little spoon” to me.
Is that a real thing? People that cry after sex?? Thank goodness I never encountered it if true, that would not have ended well.
I cry when I orgasm with my husband. Not sure why, and I’m not sad or anything…I laugh/cry if it’s a good sesh, lol. Maybe it’s just a rush of emotions/neurotransmitters?
Yes, it’s a thing, but it has more to do with brain chemistry than emotion. But no less weird, when you are with someone as a one-nighter. No thanks. I’m with Kaiser on this one. STOP. EFFING CRYING.
There’s no crying in baseball.
Or sex.
Interesting! Well, I have learned something new today, some sort of chemical/hormonal reaction makes sense. I’m just surprised I’d never heard of it before…I can’t imagine how awkward it would be if a guy started crying after sex though, especially if it’s the first time.
For sure…such a double standard, but I’d be weirded out if I was with a dude and he “sobbed”…
I don’t always cry, to be clear… just the really big “Earth Shakers” will do it for me, lol. And it’s not “sobbing” (that’d be weird!) it’s like a laugh/cry…
Wait people cry after sex? It’s fun, why you crying? (unless you know, groundbreaking moment)
Guess I’m a dude too because the *entire* concept of that is new to me as a 28 year old female. I thought it was just Victorian Harlequin Romance Novel subtext.
I’ve cried. It can happen when it’s really good, as Amanduh says. Just a deep release that even brings tears. I’m a woman. I’ve never been with a man who cries in bed. But I was with a man for a while who cried when it was cold outside.
Wasn’t it alleged that B-Coop was a weeper?
It was alledged he was a creeper, I think.
Hahaha
+1000. love this response!
Oh my god, you made me laugh so hard I spit my tea!
Hilarious
Has anyone here actually had a dude do this? I mean, I love my husband but I would be a bit freaked out if he cried and I’m married to him!
Yes. It was awkward, painful to witness and a brief as hell relationship.
Sack up, go into another room and weep gently into a kleenex, little man. FFS.
Laughing, during and after, fine! But crying? I’d run a mile. Not because it’s ‘unmanly’, but I’d find it un peu creepy.
Have you ever had the urge to laugh during sex when it was totally inappropriate, like guy was all serious and you burst out laughing? That happened to me once and it was so awful. I nearly separated a rib from my rib cage to keep from laughing. I never could figure out why.
Oh god yeah….when a guy was particularly reverential, like we were performing some rite in a Marion Zimmer Bradley novel. Not only dying to laugh but scream “they’re ‘tits’, not ‘breasts’, in my house!”
It’s just chemical. Like a big release of serontinin or something…I forget the particulars…
Heh – I have had the laughing after. The awkwardness and the trying to stop laughing just made me laugh harder. I don’t think he believed me when I told him it was a compliment.
Im not sure I would even know what to do if a guy started crying after sex. Im not into the emo thing either. Im not totally heartless or anything, just not into that kind of thing. I also can’t really related to women who cry over every little thing either but then I’ve never really been a emotionally expressive person.
Pat his back, sneak out of bed and RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNN!!!
Right on, Kaiser. I’ve been accused of the exact same thing. I’ve cried a couple of times when I’ve been upset of course, but it’s not often and I freak the eff out when other people do it in front of me. as for the sex crying, i guess the only way I could see that happening is if it was some sort of natural response that your body produces, like a rush of some type of hormone…not sure what I’m talking about but I’m sure some scientist on here will know what I mean.
I cried after masturbating once and not like a tear falling down my cheek, I mean proper sobbing, ugly-crying…I still don’t know wtf happened but I’m guessing like you, something hormonal? lol?
His one night stand obviously watched The Notebook (Zzzzzzzz) and Blue Valentine one too many times.
A weeper. No. Just no. I mean, guy, stop the tears because you’re losing more fluids, so here’s some Gatorade to help with your dehydration, and I’ll just let myself out.
Lol
LMAO.
I’m not even a fan, but the story is repulsive on many levels. Why someone would feel compelled to tell a rag magazine this, if this was true, and why said magazine would print it is beyond just normal decency. It could have been a one time, really weird occurrence, if it happened at all.
Hey, good point Kiddo. I would like to see a return of “normal decency”.
All true. Especially Dick move on her part.
F*ck that. I’m in a committed, loving marriage and I can’t fathom appreciating or enjoying my husband crying after sex. That would instantly move me to the ‘pants’ role, and that’s nowhere I want to be. Yech.
For some reason I believe this. He just seems a bit wet. At least she said he was amazing in bed before the crying.
Maybe he cried cause he finally got it right!
For some reason I believe this. He just seems a bit wet. At least she said he was amazing in bed before the crying.
This reminds me of the Friends episode when Rachel had finally got her boyfriend (Bruce Willis) to open up–he as super stoic despite a number of losses. Once the floodgates started he cried over everything. She tried to divert him in bed and it worked–until they were done and then he started sobbing into his tissues again as they lay there. That was the end of that couple.
It might just be from the release of tension.
Maybe he was crying because he had a one night stand and perhaps he cheated.
Why even report a story like this? Random woman needs cash, makes up BS story. Crikey, gullible much?
It all depends on how bad the sex was. If it was a complete waste of that 7 minutes of my life, I might shed a tear; thats time that could have been spent drinking a martini, after all.
Well, that makes sense. With my ex, I often thought…huh…could probably have thrown in a load of laundry in that time span…would have been more fulfilling, too. Had I thought of the martini, definitely would have teared up. You only live once.
Wow, I have something in common with Ryan Gosling. Thatrandom club girl I picked up made me weep. Wonder if she was the same chick? No, just kidding. But really, I have cried after sex. Mostly because it was with my ex-husband and I was bored to tears.
Crying is a natural and normal part of being human. It’s regretful that cultural norms for “men” only accept passionate displays of anger or joy. The emotions of fear and sadness are somehow deemed less “manly” and “weaker” when in reality all four emotions are completely normal and hard-wired.
Well said, Whatever!
I agree. I don’t see what the big deal is. Maybe he had an emotional day on set. Bad day at work? Why aren’t men allowed to cry? And why are we shaming them if they do? I’d rather have a few million cryers out there than beaters.
Beware of men who cry. It’s true that men who cry are sensitive to and in touch with feelings, but the only feelings they tend to be sensitive to and in touch with are their own.
Nora Ephron
this describes my Ex to the Tee so sensitive and so selfish
This is hard to picture, but who knows what kind of day or week Ryan was having. Long Live Lloyd Dobler. He stole my heart many moons ago. He has ruined me. I can’t settle for for less. Oh well. 😉
I don’t really care how a guy is after sex. Some cry, others laugh, some want to cuddle. I for example like to be left alone for a little bit, to cool off. Just don’t touch me. As a matter of fact, I like to turn over and fall asleep right after. Yup, just like a typical guy, though I’m a girl, so what? As long as the sex is great, who cares?
“… Is he the guy who cries after hot sex with a random club girl?…”
Actually, I can’t picture him having “hot sex” with ANY girl. 😴
Women always complain that men are “too insensitive” but what they REALLY mean is “he’s not sensitive enough to *my* needs”… 9 times out of 10 they do, anyway.
Jesus,if some guy started crying after sex with me I would assume he was either a mental patient or I was really bad in bed !! And I know I’m not bad in bed ! Lol
Also, I went on a blind date once ( thanks, sis), and basically cut the date short cuz it just was NOT working, and the guy started crying !! Holy God, talk about uncomfortable! I couldn’t get out of the car quick enough. ! I didn’t even know this guy and he’s crying over me ?? I wanted to kill my sister.
We’re always shaming men for crying. Women can be criers, CEOs, stay at home moms, make-up bloggers, and professional boxers. We want all the walls torn down and to not feel bad about traditional female roles either. We should give men the same latitude.
While I don’t think this particular story is true, I have to say: there are worse things in life than a guy who sheds a few tears after sex. I actually have a harder time seeing Ryan Gosling as club-girl-one-night-stand-sexy than accepting a guy who cries. As quite a few here have pointed out, it’s probably a mostly chemical reaction after a mind-blowing orgasm. And even if it’s an emotional reaction, who knows. Maybe he had a horrible day, I don’t know. In the end I think I’d take a pillow weeper (who doesn’t look like it, please) over a jerk who wants a detailed performance praise after sex (Not the “I hope it was good for you” variety, but like “Was I good? On a scale from 1 to 10? Did you like that special move I did after that other special move?”) And as I tend to fall asleep right after sex he can sniffle all he wants, I probably won’t even notice it lol.
I’m totally for men crying. It gives me kicks. I like to be the strong one. I love it in any situation, just not after they had sex with me. No, thank you. Good for me, I wouldn’t touch Ryan Gossling with a ten-yard pole. I can’t with his face.
I agree with what some commenters up top said. this is supposed to be a feminist site, right? can’t have it both ways. men are allowed to cry, too.
Once, when my husband and I were first dating I noticed that he had a tear running down his cheek after we made love, and I was so touched. I said, “Are those tears of joy?” and he said, “What? Oh, it must be allergy season.”
I have the most irrational taste in men ever. I actually love the hipster-pillow weeper look. Black hair and puppy brown eyes kill me, and I’ve never been fond of big muscular guys.
When it comes to personality, however, I DETEST pretentious hipsters and overly sentimental guys. Give me a stoner dude with great humor who takes nothing seriously other than his job and/or studies. I’ve been lucky, anyway. I’ve managed to find a guy who fits my irrational taste like a glove.
So, yeah… even if this story is most likely bs it only makes my list of reasons for NOT getting the Gosling appeal longer.