On Sunday night, Danny Masterson wouldn’t let her into Kid’s Cotton Club, his weekly jazz night at Guy’s. Lohan resorted to calling ex-BF Wilmer Valderrama, who was inside with Jamie Foxx and Mekhi Phifer, to ask him to get Masterson to let her in. According to our source inside who witnessed the whole thing, Valderrama obliged, telling his “That ’70s Show” costar that his Lohan beef was vodka under the bridge. But Masterson wouldn’t budge, saying he didn’t want her in because he doesn’t respect the way she lives her life—and that Paris Hilton isn’t welcome either. How did the (underage!) Lindsay respond? According to the crowd that witnessed it, she screamed at the top of her lungs and threatened to call the cops. Eventually, however, she simply left with her tail between her legs.

“It’s a night to pretend we’re sophisticated when really everyone’s a douche bag,” he said. He also gave us some tips for getting past his velvet rope. First and foremost, Danny demands to see your pearly whites. If you’re not smiling at the door, you’re not getting in. He also says guys must wear a suit for entrance and that he’d rather rowdy frat dudes look for another venue to party in. Girls can show up in whatever they’d like, but he finds that those in casual duds act introverted all night and then come back the next week wearing a dress.

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