Madonna arrived in Malawi Sunday evening for a week-long stay which she hopes will lead to her adoption of three-year-old Mercy James (who is perhaps four years old, the reports keep changing). Earlier last week, it seemed as if Madonna was going to pull off her second Malawian adoption with much less fanfare and criticism than her first adoption of David Banda. Unfortunately for all involved, scandal, criticism and the media glare follow every decision Madonna makes.
Almost simultaneously, the grandmother of Mercy James and international children’s advocacy groups slammed Madonna for her attempted adoption of Mercy. Initial reports claimed that Mercy was in fact an orphan, that Mercy’s mother had died within days of Mercy’s birth, and that Mercy’s father had died of AIDS. Mercy’s uncle will be attending Monday’s court hearing, and basically signing Mercy over to Madonna, but the child’s grandmother is putting up a fight. The grandmother, Lucy Chekechiwa, claims she will resist Madonna’s efforts, and that Madonna is trying to “steal” her granddaughter, who was supposed to be released to her care at the age of six:
Mercy was placed in the orphanage after her 18-year-old mother died days after her birth and her father died of Aids.
However the girl’s grandmother Lucy Chekechiwa, 61, has said she will resist the move and claims an agreement with the orphanage means she will keep Mercy once she turns six.
She told The Sun newspaper: “Why doesn’t this singer pick other children? It is stealing. I want to go to court, I won’t let her go.”
She added: “They told me when I visited her last month that they want to find a better education and home for Mercy. But I am sticking to the initial agreement that Mercy will return home to me after she reaches six years old.”
From The Telegraph
The Telegraph is now reporting the rumor that Mercy’s father might still be alive. Much like David Banda’s father, who has reportedly gone to the Malawi lodge where Madonna is staying so that he can visit his son.
Advocates from Save the Children are also pitching a major fit over this whole situation. Their official policy is to exhaust all options within the home country, even encouraging extended families to care for orphaned children, rather than giving children away to orphanages. A spokesperson for Save the Children says, “We urge any celebrity to set an example, to follow internationally agreed procedures designed to protect the child, and to ensure that the child in question has no other options in their home community.” The Telegraph has more:
Officials at the airport in the nation’s capital Lilongwe said Madonna arrived late on Sunday.
“She disembarked from the cargo area and jumped into her convoy,” an airport official said. The luxury lodge where Madonna has stayed in the past has been fully booked and casual visitors have been turned away. An employee said Madonna had checked into the exclusive lodge, accompanied by her son David Banda, whom she adopted in 2006 from the same Mchinji Home of Hope orphanage where four-year-old Mercy lives.
The employee, who did not want to be named, said David’s biological father Yohane Banda was at the lodge to see his son.
Children’s charity Save the Children has urged the singer to think again although the family of the toddler she is seeking to remove from the impoverished African republic is now said to be supporting the adoption.
Questions were asked after she and then-husband Guy Ritchie took David Banda to their London home in 2006 while the child was 13 months old, and her latest quest for a sister for David has led to renewed criticism.
Mercy’s grandmother Lucy Chekechiwa, 61, initially hit out at the star, telling tabloid newspapers: “It is stealing. I won’t let her go.” Mrs Chekechiwa claimed it had been agreed the child would go to her when she turned six. Mercy’s father is believed to be alive but no other details were available from a welfare official and people close to the case who today said the girl’s relatives have now consented to the adoption. Madonna and the girl’s uncle are expected to appear in court today to sign adoption papers.
Austin Msowoya, legal researcher with Malawi’s Law Commission, played down concerns saying the best interests of the child needed to be taken into account – whether this was staying in an orphanage in Malawi or getting “an education with Madonna”.
“When you look at these two options, then perhaps it becomes in the best interests of the child to allow the adoption if the parents and the guardians consent to it,” he said.
Meanwhile, Save the Children said orphans should be cared for by extended family in their home country and suggested international adoption can make matters worse. Spokesman Dominic Nutt said: “The best place for a child is in his or her family in their home community. Most children in orphanages have one parent still living, or have an extended family that can care for them in the absence of their parents.”
According to Save the Children, international adoption should only be considered if the child is a genuine orphan, and if all other alternatives in their own country have been genuinely exhausted.
“International adoption can actually exacerbate the problem it hopes to solve,” said Mr Nutt. “The very existence of orphanages encourages poor parents to abandon children in the hope that they will have a better life.”
Mr Nutt also said international adoption can mean big business in some countries, with “unscrupulous” adoption agencies profiting from the sale of children. He said: “We urge any celebrity to set an example, to follow internationally agreed procedures designed to protect the child, and to ensure that the child in question has no other options in their home community.”
Madonna’s spokeswoman Liz Rosenberg, who has not commented on the adoption reports, said the star would not respond to Save the Children.
From The Telegraph
I totally understand why these Save the Children advocates are getting so riled up, but they might want to think about spreading the blame around – Madonna wouldn’t be able to go in and have a baby hand-delivered to her if the Malawian adoption system wasn’t so screwed up. The Malawian legal system is basically telling the world that they’re open for the baby-selling business if the celebrity is big enough and the money she spreads around is enough.
Madonna is shown on Malawai on 3/29/09. Credit: WENN.com and BARM/Fame Pictures
Puleese!! That african grandmother is not even vaguley interested in her grandchild! She can smell dollar signs, its an African thing! That poor child has been in an orphanage for 4 or more years and only now the grandmother wants her!! Give me a break! I see this every day here!
Speaking as a single mom, I don’t think a single mom who travels constantly is the best choice for an adoptive parent.
Kids need stability and routine, and a revolving door of hotel rooms and paid caregivers can’t offer that.
Madonna does not appear to be a very caring person. Maybe her persona is wrong. I just can not warn up to her. She apears arrogant and conceited. Not a great role model. But if she can give the childrena good home than I guess it is what is best.
In countries like Malawi an orphanage is sometimes used more as foster care, by family that cannot care for a child at that moment but intend to have the child with them again in the future. To me it sounds like what happened here, and perhaps also with David Banda.
If we’re talking about what is best for the child, for Madonna it would be the cost of *one night* in her extravagant hotels to ensure that Mercy could stay with her family, be well fed, have health care and get an education.
But she doesn’t do that, because it’s all about what _she_ wants. Not about what’s best for the child.
@CandyKay, my thoughts exactly!
Im tired of celebrities flying to third world countries and just pick a kid as if it was an open supermarket!!
Money or better education in no means is the best for a child, there is much more than living like a celebrity.
I agree with Jacqueline. It is so easy for all these agencies to cry foul and for many people overseas to criticize without knowing much about the on-goings on this god forsaken continent. Being African myself, I know how things work around here. If it smells like money, than common sense is thrown out of the window – forget about the interest of the child, people here have killed for less.
The grandmother, at that age, is already a pensioner and probably doesn’t get much from the pension fund (today’s exchange rate, that money is a little over U$16). If she is the sole guardian, than that money doesn’t go a long way, i.e medical bills, school funds and basic necessities. If the child is fortunate enough to finish high school, the odds that she will go on to study at an institute for further learning are very minimal. This means she will probably get a job that pays her a minimal wage. And the cycle continues… she gets pregnant at a young age, gives birth, finds out that she is HIV positive, the father denies responsibility for the baby, the baby becomes an orphan etc. Poverty is the number one killer here as it is self-destructing and leads to many, many other problems.
When she is older, ploughing the fields in the blazing sun of Malawi, she will often think about what her life could have been with famous Madonna had her family put her needs before their greed.
@Candy: A life of traveling in poverty stricken Africa is one of privilege. So please, don’t talk about stability and routine when you don’t know half the story of what African children have to endure during their childhoods years.
I don’t understand the grandmother’s claim. Why would the orphanage wait until Mercy turned 6 to give her to the grandmother? This doesn’t really make sense to me. On another note, I read that Madonna gave only 3 million to her Raising Malawi foundation, but tens of millions to her Kaballah religion. I also don’t really understand why she wants to adopt children. I know other bloggers say the child is an accessory, it’s PC to adopt an African child, she’s competing with Angelina Jolie, etc. But beyond those speculations, her motive still baffles me. I’d think she has enough on her plate with Lourdes, Rocco, David, her career, her religion, her new boyfriend, etc. Even with help, it’s a lot to juggle.
@Nony: And how do you know what’s best for the child? Have you ever been at an orphanage in Africa? Please, do tell me.
I’ve done various works at several charity organizations in South Africa, so I know a little about what I’m talking about. Most of the children at orphanages here often not complete orphans as they normally have extended families from both mother and father’s side. But in most cases, the families completely wash their hands clean of the children. I don’t necessarily blame them either, as they are usually unable to feed an extra mouth in their care.
Although these families are encouraged to visit the children often – as it is part of the child’s psychological wellbeing – many don’t bother to show face. In fact, most children are never collected.
I have a feeling this is exactly the same in Mercy’s case. The grandmother probably didn’t have any intention of collecting the child, until someone informed her of Madonnna’s celebrity status and the family grew a hunger for money. I don’t blame them, this is what poverty does.
But please, don’t come preach about what is best for the child unless you’ve seen the atrocities going on in Africa (and I’m not talking about what you see on television either)
Well said Pufft. These people can’t comprehend what children go through in Africa. They don’t know what real poverty is. We have the highest child rape statistics in the world. If a child can get out of the orphanage and have a better life, then I don’t understand why prople are against it.
I am so truly disgusted by this whole thing it makes me ill. First of all, why this child, why can’t she adopt a child where there is no conflicts surrounding the adoption and that everyone agrees to. Calling Mercy’s grandmother a money hungry careless evildoer ( NO.1, THE AFRICAN WAY!!!???- ) is not only politically incorrect, but also just plain ignorant. THEY ARE HER BLOODRELATIVES, They might actually have feelings for her and hate to see her get dragged off with the wealthy freak that exposes them to strange religions, ever changing inappropriate relationships ( JESUS?!, AROD?), being raised by caretaker that she hires and fires at an instants notice. Seriously committed Gay couples who can provide and want to adopt children in this country and abroad are being scrutinized to the extent where it it nearly impossible for them to ever hope to adopt. BUT MADONNA QUALIFIES FOR BEING A GOOD MOTHER AND PROVIDING A STABLE ENVIRONMENT? and I so agree that if she had the child’s best interest at heart she would donate the frickin money that she spend on just one of her very costly trips there to the childs family to ensure a comfortable life within her culture and around her people. This is sick. I would love to start a petition to stop people like her from buying herself expensive foreign handbags.
Thanks for that, pufft. I’m sure there’s an awful lot of truth in what you say. I don’t doubt Madonna’s sincerity in wanting to adopt this child, or her ability to care for it, it’s just, coming in the wake of the controversy surrounding the earlier adoption, she’s coming across here as someone who actively thrives on negative attention because she knows she’s holding all the ‘power’ cards.
i dont blame madonna here, surprisingly. the malawi adoption system, along with their orphanages that are feeding into the adoption system sound like they are seriously f*cked, and need to be streamlined, cleaned up, etc. they leave a bunch of grey areas open-this is the LAST place in the world I would adopt a baby from, just based on the sheer amount of ambiguity.
Gia, its obvious that you know nothing about the African way. I am african, are you?
I’m torn. It’s wonderful to get a child out of poverty. Being adopted by someone with money sounds wonderful but every child needs consistent parenting and affection. As for the role model part, well.. I guess she’s a good financial role model. If the child has family there and you really care about the child, wouldn’t the normal progression be to help out that family and get that child out of poverty without necessarily taking the kid away? That missing step makes me wonder.
“@Candy: A life of traveling in poverty stricken Africa is one of privilege. So please, don’t talk about stability and routine when you don’t know half the story of what African children have to endure during their childhoods years.”
I think we can agree that the ideal for most African children would be a stable, healthy, and happy life with their families in Africa, not a life of adoption and jet-setting with random international celebrities.
@Gia: And what do you suggest is the best option for this child? To grow up with a blood relative, an old one at that, who in the past revoked her option to collect the child once she is 6 until someone with money came along and showed an interest in the child?
I’ll tell you about an adoption case I handled two years ago. A 17-year-old HIV positive mother from Gugulethu, Cape Town, who loved her baby whole-heartedly gave her baby up for adoption to a white couple struggling to conceive for over a dozen years. The young mother knew she didn’t have the means to support or care for the child, so she gave her only baby away so that the child can have a better future.
I spoke to teh 17-year-old mother before she signed the adoption papers, and asked her if she was sure she wanted to do it as she clearly loved her baby. She said: “Love alone will not put food on the table and clothes on our my backs. The best gift I can ever give my baby is to give her away so that she has a chance of becoming a doctor someday.”
@Geronimo: I understand what you are saying, but can one really blame Madonna for the distorted information she received from the orphanage? Like I said, most children there aren’t complete orphans – just that extended family have failed to show any interest in the child’s care. If she was informed that both parents have passed away and that at age four, no one has collected the child, isn’t it fair to assume that she thought the adoption will run smoother than that of David Banda?
I think it also speaks volumes that she allowed David to see his father while in Malawi. So I have to assume this is not all about her and what she can get away with.
@Bros: I agree 100% with your sentiments.
@ Jacqueline: So you would just see dollar signs in this situation as well?
Madonna could do a lot more for child poverty/AIDS in Malawi in the long run by spending the money she’s slipping under the table to buy this orphan on sex education programs and condoms. No AIDS = No AIDS orphans.
Having worked in orphanages in Haiti and Brasil (which is admittedly not Africa, but Haiti is similar enough with regards to abject poverty) I personally think it is ALWAYS preferable to maintain the biological family. My issue with Madonna’s adoption is from an ethical standpoint – she is waltzing in and taking a child that is four years old. That girl has a routine and a life and here comes this old white woman to jet her off to London and make her the newest paparazzi target. Not to mention the fact that it’s an open secret how Madonna gets her kids from Malawi. There is a legal and ethical way to handle an international adoption. Unfortunately, Madonna fancies herself well above those laws.
As an adoptive mother of a a two year old and a 15 month old (domestic adoption, so again it’s different but in a lot of ways, kids are kids) I don’t think that Madonna’s life of traveling/rotating boyfriends/fame not to mention three other children with two other men is the best place to bring in a four year old child. My kids, being young and having had a fairly non traumatic history prior to placement, still struggled with the transition. I can’t imagine what this poor girl will go through.
@Candy: I agree, that would be the ideal way to grow up, unfortunately, that is but a dream for many African children.
Let me take you through a day of a child in a poverty stricken country:
Children wake up as early as 5 a.m to do household chores. More than one child bathes in a bowl with five cups of water (they have learned to make due and normally only wash their faces) in the morning. Than they have to walk many kilometers to school (and not in the most comfortable shoes either, if they have shoes at all – and in most cases, they carry their school books in a plastic bag). They don’t take lunch boxes to school either.
After school, they walk back home and immediately, they have to cook lunch for the elders (this is the traditional norm – children have to band over for elders and cater to their every need without question or complain. This I believe is called RESPECT in Africa).
If the country has been blessed with rainfall, young girls work in the fields and boys graze cattle until just before sunset.
The girl also have to walk kilometers to the closest well/water container and collect clean drinking water for the family. They normally carry the water in a bucket on their head (girls learn to master this trick at a very young age)
Then the girls have to prepare dinner for the family. Those that are a little more privileged, have a bath in a bowl before going to bed. Otherwise, they only take baths every 2nd/3rd day.
Clinics are normally several minutes or many hours away from the homesteads (they are usually situated closer to the schools and churches – the village centre). But it is by no means the best medical attention one can get. In fact, it is a common joke here in Africa that if you go to a state hospital or clinic (not everyone can afford private), you get panado for every disease known to men ( a sick joke, but one that is not too far from the truth).
Speaking about sex is taboo here. So, although the government and non-profitable organisations try to educate the mass about HIV/Aids, most children fall pregnant and contract HIV/Aids at a young age.
So yes, it would be ideal for most African children to be in a stable, healthy, and happy environment with their families, but sadly, that’s a far cry from what many of these children will ever have.
@Pufft – I think what I’m saying is that her experience with David Banda’s adoption and the disengenuity of the Malawian officials at that time should have made her doubly alert the second time round, or alternatively, made her determined to not put herself in that situation ever again. Like bros said, why on earth deal with these people again when they plainly were less than above board last time round? This is what I meant by her courting controversy.
I think the problem is that she keeps picking children with living parent(s) / relatives. There must be a million real orphans in Africa. IMO it looks like a rich person can take a child away from a biological parent or relative because they’re poor. the children are in orphanages because it’s the only place they are guaranteed food and medical attention. I think what she’s doing is a good thing and am not questioning her motives, just think she should find a child who really is orphaned and she wouldn’t get all this bad press.
@Kait: From an ethical standpoint, I don’t completely disagree with you. I agree that adoption works best when the child is younger (in fact, babies are the best bet), but four is not the worst age for a child to be introduced to a new environment, culture and lifestyle either.
I would be on the fence about this whole situation if I didn’t know what actually happens to these children in the long run, but having seen it first handedly, I can’t be against what Madonna is trying to do.
David seems to have adopted quite well, and is clear that that kid is sincerely loved. I’m just finding it hard to believe that Madonna is doing this because she is media or power hungry. Do we always have to find a motive behind an otherwise applaudable initiative?
And although you can relate to some extent on the poverty that cripples orphans from getting the best care, in Africa, there are many other aspects one needs to take into consideration and understand, i.e the culture, the norms, the way of life.
@ Pufft: I think it also speaks volumes that she allowed David to see his father while in Malawi. So I have to assume this is not all about her and what she can get away with.
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Wow, I cannot disagree more. The MAIN reason she’s allowing Mr. Banda to see his son is because if she didn’t she’d get loads of bad publicity about keeping the boy away from his father. Madonna comes off as a very arrogant and narcissistic person. There’s no way she see Mr. Banda as an equal — just an obstacle she can easily be rid of by using her money.
Well let Granny have the kid then….what will be different when the child is 6 as opposed to now? Will Granny have more resources then to care for her? Is she even visiting her in the Orphanage? If I was Madonna I’d look elsewhere for an easier adoption.
I wish pufft would put a sock in it. If I want a sermon I can go to church. Opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one!
Jacqueline, Do you represent all Africans? Bacause I had no idea that ALL Africans according to you are corrupt and money hungry. I too have been to Africa and have seen families struggle, who try their best to make it work ( believe it or not some are actually happy, Imagine that POOR AND HAPPY) and feel very strongly about their heritage and bonds with their relatives. and for Miss PUFFT:
Why don’t you read the my previous whole post which already answered your question. Do you have any idea how much money this woman blows on a daily basis? Enough to provide financial relieve for the children and the families she TRIES to rescue. Do the math, what this egotistical woman spends on her travels along with her entourage and lackeys could provide for a longterm stable environment and decent schooling to many many enpoverished in need. Let’s get serious people, is this woman really capable of doing anything out of the goodness of her heart??? Or out of concern for this poor little girl who is going to be ripped out of her familiar surrounding and be hunted by papparazzi and lunatics. Many years ago, I was a single mother with 2 little children, a step away from welfare. Would I have given up my children for adoption for a better chance at life? I understand why Mercy’s grandmother is fighting for her to stay in Africa, in a way she is telling the rich people who come in and SUpport their corrupt system that It’s not okay.
dinigi,
thats super rude. in this case, pufft has first-hand knowledge of a location, situation, and context. its not an uninformed opinion she is just spouting off. it would probably do you good to pay attention instead of simply dismissing everything because you dont like it. we get lucky when posters have real first hand knowledge, and I consider edifying and weight their posts more, since there is ground-level experience.
J-ferber: In regards to Madonnna only giving 3 million to Raising Malawi in comparison to the tens of millions to Kababallah…. I will reiterate what I said in a comment on the Mel Gibson’s wife spends $50 Million for revenge on church..
Madonna gives to Kaballah because it comes back to her. It is all an elaborate tax scheme. The three million she gives to Malawi comes back in spades, and dI agree, and yes if this is really her life’s passion aond not an attempt to make her look less greedy, vapid and ridiculous, then maybe she would be filtering less money back to herself and more to the charity she has self promoted herself with.
But again, I doubt unless you are a tremendous auditor that you will catch the Celebrity tax cheats who filter their money through places like Kaballah, Scientology etc…
For the “followers” in the lower eschelons it is more about mind control, and having a celebrity/powerful people to emmulate helps gain that psychological advantage of control, and to make it look somewhat legitimate when they are really all about money and getting their tax funds back…
sorry a little unrelated to adopting Mercy, but still relevant.
This lady does not think the rules apply to her in any way shape or form.
However, one must admire her drive and tremendous ability to keep our interest.
Why do I have that strange feeling that PUFFT anD Jacqueline is the same person, who has never left her hometown of Pooptown Indiana. Ya see, I don’t know you, so I guess I shouldn’t assume about you (GUYS?), why are you passing judgment on Mercy’s grandmother? Does age discriminate against being a good caretaker? what do you know about how involved she has been or tried to be in the child’s life. Is every African child doomed to walk down the path of poverty and PLOWING the fields in the sweltering sun and dream of the live the could have had with SAINTA MADONNA.
As far as I know, people graduate evry day from universities, become doctors and scientists, nurses, healthcare workers ect. IN AFRICA! Imagine that. While i am not saying all is great in Malawi, it sets a bad example for the rich folks to fly in pay for the child they choose and then return to your lavish lifestyle. What gives?
Amen and God bless you @ Pufft and Jaqueline! We couldn’t begin to imagine…
@lola: Hahahahaha… Believe you me, I don’t need an alter ego to agree with my opinions. And I certainly don’t suffer from a multi-personality disorder.
Now to respond to the valuable contribution you have made on this thread….
Madonna is not the youngest celebrity either, so my reasons for making references to the granny’s age is not necessarily to discredit her as a caregiver, but simply because she is a pensioner that most likely survives on the little money she received from old age fund.
My argument that Mercy’s grandmother has not been involved in the toddler’s life prior to Madonna jetting off to Malawi are based on countless reports in the media. I didn’t suck it out of my thumb. Go to BBC news website, you’ll find interesting and in-depth articles on this story, some for some against… but interesting all the same
My intention was also not to make it appear as if poor people in Africa aren’t happy. Many of them in fact are content with the little that they have, but we are talking about a little girl that has been in an orphanage since she was born.
I graduated in Africa, so did my siblings, friends and family, so once again, you have missed my point. While many people in the upper bracket as well as middle-class people take advantage of the education system, the unemployment rate in Southern Africa (and indeed in Malawi) remains frightfully high. You can count the number of success stories that involve children from poverty stricken families graduating from universities and what else. It’s a sad reality.
I’m not going to pretend I know the motives behind the grandmother’s actions, because I don’t. But I do know this: Madonna is adopting because she thinks it boosts her image. It makes her look like a saint, because she thinks she is the almighty that can save the world. And the girl will absolutely end up becoming an accessory to Madonna.
Madonna disgusts me to no end. Hopefully the new girl’s nanny will show her some real motherly love. A friend of mine considers her own nanny more of a mother than her real mom.
I like the point made in the CNN article about this very subject that “adoption” and “giving assistance to a country / families in need” are not mutually exclusive actions. Plus, here’s what annoys me, this guy from Save the Children– he’s basically indicating you can do so much better by hacking at the root of the problem and then goes on to explain that by “investing” in children a much bigger impact and return results as far as countering poverty / the ills of the nation with orphans. What he fails to mention is that it’s not all going to be fixed by philanthropy either. What about totalitarian regimes? Famine? Floods? Agricultural practices? Cultural practices? Lack of democracy? World debt? There are so many other factors that go into solving the root(s) of the problem, but it’s terribly convenient (and Oh SO Altruistic Sounding) that he does not mention any of those.
Furthermore, if children should be raised by extended family, WHY aren’t the extended families stepping up to the plate before the children are offered for adoption? I understand that in some cases there is corruption, and I’m not saying that adoption practices don’t need to be reformed. However, in this case with Madonna, where was the grandmother before NOW? Why is this Mercy girl in the orphanage – why was the grandmother going to get her supposedly at 6 years of age? Did the grandmother consider the psychological impact of the girl being institutionalized for 6 blasted years? Has the grandmother’s economic conditions suddenly improved? Has she suddenly found a desire to take in her grandaughter? WHere’s the rest of the story?
I think that this is pretty hard on Madonna and she’s an easy target. It’s regrettable that Save the Children is attempting to make itself look so incredibly pious. Moreover, there are lots of very informed persons out there and plenty of empirical evidence to suggest that AID ($$) in it’s most altruistic form is doing nothing to solve Africa’s problems, but everything to exacerbate them. Because now there are ENTIRE generations that know nothing but AID sustenance ($$). How is THAT helping the economies of these countries, which in turn would help families? Why doesn’t Save the Children discuss that? Because it’s not it their interest to do so.
“Puleese!! That african grandmother is not even vaguley interested in her grandchild! She can smell dollar signs, its an African thing!”
so, jaqueline, just curious: if all africans are money hungry and you are african, does that mean you are money hungry, too?
in any case, you & pfft can get off your high horses…no one here is denying the hard life of poor children in africa, or anywhere else. most of us are educated and some of us have actually been to poor countries ourselves. but maybe madonna’s money could be used to better purposes, instead of just accessorizing her outfit with more bought african children. there are also many africans who are tired of rich white people taking african children away from africa. just because someone is rich does not mean they are a better parent. maybe rich americans should adopt poor american babies because they can give them a better life than the trailer park in appalachia. it is not an easy solution, no matter what. i just think if madge is going to adopt why not adopt a true orphan? there are many orphans worldwide whose entire families have been wiped out by disease or war or famine…why can’t she just adopt one of them?
@Zelia: Touche! Now that’s some real food for thought.
@Kate: I’ll give you a chance to read through my comments again. Perhaps than you can comprehend what it is I’ve been trying to say instead of you jumping to conclusions. Also, please, since you are clearly interested in this story, take this opportunity to read other articles on news agencies. It’ll do you a world of good.
Let me reiterate. Madonna did not necessarily handpick the child herself, she asked for a daughter for David in a certain age group and the orphanage (sic) gave her ‘options’ under the pretext that the children are orphan (or half orphans – as it is only Mercy’s mother and father that are reportedly dead).
I’ve said this countless times, most orphans here are not COMPLETE orphans. Most of them have extended family. In Mercy’s case, she has an uncle, a grandmother and I’m sure many other relatives who did not step up to the plate. Implying that they shouldn’t be eligible for adoption is silly at best.
When I grow up an get my parents money I’m going to have a big map of the world painted on my families lawn. Then I’m going to buy..I mean adopt a kid from every country. Every morning I’ll have the kids stand on the map in their home country and we’ll all sing “We are the world” together…until I get bored with them at least.
snickering at Rich Kid’s comment.
@Kate: I’ll give you a chance to read through my comments again. Perhaps than you can comprehend what it is I’ve been trying to say instead of you jumping to conclusions. Also, please, since you are clearly interested in this story, take this opportunity to read other articles on news agencies. It’ll do you a world of good.
um…what exactly are you talking about? i should read other articles on news agencies? that doesn’t even make sense. if you mean i should read other articles on adoption, i have. i stand by my comments. not every “orphan” is a complete orphan, obviously. my point was that maybe if madge wants to adopt a child she should adopt one who either has no living family or no family who wants to adopt her. this girl’s grandmother wants her,and it really isn’t up to you or me to decide if she should get her since we don’t know the situation. i am not assuming that because the granny is african she wants money, as you & jacqueline seem to believe. kind of sad that you automatically beleieve the worst of the old lady…maybe you should explore other modes of thinking. it might do you a world of good.
@kate: Actually, I meant just that… read other articles on new agencies. To elaborate, read other articles on Madonna’s adoption (not just adoption) on other on-line new agency feed, such as CNN, BBC etc. I thought it made perfect sense, forgive me.
I can’t speak for Jacqueline, but I drew the conclusion that the granny wants money in this particular case for the simple reason that prior to Madonna showing interest in adopting Mercy, her grandmother has not been present in her life. In fact, if numerous media reports are anything to go by, the granny revoked her decision to care for the child.
Zelia’s post asks all the relevant questions: where was the grandmother before NOW? Why is this Mercy girl in the orphanage – why was the grandmother going to get her supposedly at 6 years of age? Did the grandmother consider the psychological impact of the girl being institutionalized for 6 blasted years? Has the grandmother’s economic conditions suddenly improved? Has she suddenly found a desire to take in her granddaughter? Where’s the rest of the story?
You should develop a curious sense of being. It does a world of good.
@ pufft: how do we know the grandmother didn’t visit her in the orphanage? you know nothing about the situation, none of us do. all we know is the granny wants her to stay there and madonna is insisting (again) on adopting a child who is wanted by a family member. because they are poor and black and she is rich and white it doesn;t seem to matter to her… that was my point. instead of addressing that you insist on giving all of us a lecture on how hard life is for african children. yeah…we know. we get it. but as another poster pointed out, you assume that every african child will stay illiterate, poor and push a plough until the end of her days, with no chance to better herself other than a kindly white american adopting her. your other characterization of african people is money hungry. seems awfully simplistic to me. whatever – you can think what you want.
now let’s see “jacqueline” come on board to agree with you.
How hard is to to find a child without any family… too hard for super rich Madonna
@Kate: Oh my gawd, I’ve ALREADY addressed all these questions in my previous posts and it’s such a waste of my time to continue addressing them when the person that is posting the questions simply refuses to find the answer in what I’ve ALREADY said.
Just so that we’re clear, other people besides Jacq agree with my sentiments. So put that in your pipe and smoke it. Unwitty come-backs normally achieve the opposite.
With that last note… Good night. I wish I could say it was fun trying to enlighten you, but sadly, repeatition bore me.
My keyboard is giving me a lot of trouble with the ‘S’ key, so you’ll find alot of missing S’es in my posts. Ue your imagination were need be.
Once again, good night
@ pufft: you actually started this whole thing when you responded to a question i posted for jacqueline. i actually didn’t address you at all, but you anwered which makes me think you & jacqueline are indeed the same person. i’m uncertain why you are so defensive and insulting to me and numerous others on this thread, but i really don’t care. if you can’t have a debate on a chatboard with losing it, maybe you should say “goodnight” and not return.
I’m gonna guess that the problems a poor orphan might possibly encounter becoming Madonna’s child are better than the problems a poor orphan would certainly encounter in Malawi.
So I used to be like a private detective and therefore I know for fact that Jacqueline and Pufft are indeed the same person just as you all know that she really is and was one of these excellent adoption workers who advises heartbroken mothers to give their kids away because they are better off with people with money and also knows allllll the details of this obviously complex situation, because she is AFRICAN. Remember the old saying “it takes one to know one”.
JACPUFFT, if you did such extensive research on this situation, or if you had half a brain you would know why children are usually kept until the age of six in orphanages because infants and toddlers are obviously more susceptible to diseases and malnutrition and at these orphanages they are cared for with the proper medical attention, which might be harder for Granny to provide. Also, please explain this to me, If Madonna truly loves her son David, why does she not care about his birthfather?
I’m not saying she should adopt him too, but must surely have thought about the plight he was in when he agreed to let his flesh and blood leave his motherland. Did she ever consider helping him financially and David’s half brothers or half sisters ? Did she encouraging a relationship with any of his living relatives or previous caregivers, who I’m sure were attached to this child. She says he has a map of Malawi in his room. Ha! In his room in the penthouse on Central Park West.
AS you stated so profoundly -repeation bores me (sic) too, especially your ignorant rants that you have the nerve to call enlightenment.
I’ve used my imagination -Must be lights out time in Pooptown.
Hey, Zelia… just curious how many children you have saved, how many children Madonna has saved?
I think The ‘Guy” from Save The Children beats that score a mere few hundred thousands.
You want food for thought-chew on this one;
Madonna did for fact handpicked those two particular children over many others not so cute and maybe not so healthy which afterwards she struck from her memory like a bad casting call. You make me laugh! Madonna is an easy target, really, what about Granny -must have really lousy PR people, because according to you she is just a wretched old golddigger. You as the expert should know that most Christian Orphanages ( BTW I’m agnostic) are not a dead-end zone for the children, but a place where they are attended to and cared for the best they can. hence might become a passageway to the future. Do I hear you chomping?
I found Pufft’s posts interesting and not insulting.
I found Pufft’s posts interesting and not insulting. People sure do get riled up.
Madonna should move on. She’s badgered this family about their child for years. In fact, her grandmother has said for the past couple of years that she did want not Mercy taken from Malawi. To me, Madonna is just proving that she gets whatever she wants.
As for reports of how much David gets to see his father, we must not read the same papers.
“I have never heard from her since the day I agreed to let her adopt David. She has sent no photographs or news. I suppose she just wants him for herself.”
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/article1828538.ece
Her trip to grab Mercy is the first time he’s seen his father since the adoption 3 years ago. Shame on you, Madonna!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/celebritynews/madonna/5074024/Madonna-adoption-trip-David-Banda-reunited-with-father.html
http://www.mailonsunday.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1023343/Let-son-says-real-father-Madonnas-adopted-David.html
http://www.digitalspy.com/showbiz/a45263/madonna-had-no-contact-with-davids-father.html
She’s acted pretty appallingly with David, what is wrong with this country, this government that they would so willingly sacrifice another child? And if Madonna is such a spiritual being, how can she treat these children and their families with such careless disregard?
hahaha, Gia you are hilarious! Not a great detective tho! I am definitely NOT Pufft! Its just that we see the suffering daily and perhaps become a bit cynical about people’s (i.e. grandmother) motives. Babies are left in toilets, dirt bins, and on the beach at holiday time and so on. The orphanages really struggle financially so when a child gets a chance of a good life I fully support it.
I won’t bother answering every comment left for me; the ones that are beating on a dead drum are best left alone.
KATE…@ pufft: you actually started this whole thing when you responded to a question i posted for jacqueline. i actually didn’t address you at all…
Actually, Kate, I wouldn’t have taken the time to address you had you not mentioned me in you initial post to Jacq.
I quote “in any case, you & pfft can get off your high horses”
I leave it at that.
I was making arguments of why I thought Madonna should not be crucified for wanting to adopt this child. I made MY opinions based on what I’ve seen and experienced while working with orphans, and the various articles I have read on this subject, i.e Madonna’s second adoption. Every case is different, so I could be wrong (highly doubt it). If anybody wants to address me, do so based on my previous posts without tossing in irrelevant stuff (me and Jacq are the same person?) as it takes us to a game of mudslinging instead of discussing and debating the issue at hand.
I understand growing up in Africa as an orphan is harrowing.
So if it were Trump or any other rich person known for caring and spending at least some time with their children, it would be fine with me.
But Madonna ?
There is a high probability her children will end up in substance abuse, just like so many children of entertainers – and all the education her money will provide won’t fix that.
Is that a worse kind of hell than being an orphan in Africa – that I can’t decide.
I hear that Madonna does not allow her children to watch television and they cannot eat anything but macrobotic food.
Now having your kids eat healthy food etc is fine but it sounds like an overly strict regime that doesn’t allow kids to be kids.
So Lourdes is going to rebel by eating Big Macs in front of Madoona’s face, I can see it now.
You could certainly see your expertise within the work you write. The arena hopes for more passionate writers like you who are not afraid to say how they believe. All the time go after your heart.