Cosmopolitan should name itself Kosmopolitan. Yes, the entire Kardashian-Jenner clan covers the new issue of Kosmo.. Except for Caitlyn and Sock Kardashian. Incidentally, I only recently learned that Sock Kardashian still lives with Khloe. I knew Rob Jr. lived with her back in the day, when she and Lamar were together, but I didn’t know that was still happening. Anyway, all of the Kardashian-Jenner ladies in one place, on the Kosmo cover. All of the ladies lucky/unlucky enough to fall out of Kris’s demon biscuit. According to Kosmo, this is the first time all of the ladies have been photographed together in FOUR YEARS. That can’t be right? Kris does family Christmas cards, so I don’t think that’s right.
Cosmo promises to release more photos and interview clips from their cover story called “America’s First Family” (YIKES) in the coming days. For now, they just released this quote from Ryan Seacrest, who basically created this clan and profits from them heavily.
“No one could have predicted the Kardashians’ and Jenners’ success. But when you spend time with them, what resonates is the family unit. There are so many things about them that are glamorous, crazy, and unlike our lives, but the sense of family is universal. They love and stand by one another no matter what,” says Ryan Seacrest, the executive producer of Keeping Up With the Kardashians and the family’s self-described “big brother” in Cosmo’s November 2015 issue, which celebrates the magazine’s 50th birthday. “Their unvarnished candor reveals how close they really are. What’s more, they present acceptance. You look at Bruce and now Caitlyn — you see the power of a family to come together when it would be so easy to fall apart. There’s comfort in viewing that steadfastness of love.”
Sure. Whatever you say, Ryan. Ugh.
Should we even discuss the sister drama and dynamics of these photos? These days, it always feels like Kylie is just trying to BECOME Kim and it’s really creepy. I like that Khloe stands apart with her blonde hair. I think Kourtney is a charisma vacuum even in photos. Kendall looks nice and so does Kim.
Photos courtesy of Cosmopolitan.
They are so not “Americas first family” that would be The Obamas.
The Obamas don’t get anywhere near the attention and press the Kuntrashians get. This family is in our face 24/7 and there’s no end in sight.
Did anyone else notice the corner circle: easiest workout for an epic ass? Um, but these heifers bought themselves asses … Are they still trying to pretend they got those monstrosities through squats and lunges?
I side-eyed that too. Also why the word a$$ and not butt or bum? It sounds derogatory to me.
This IS the first family – of media sluts. These people have no shame, no dignity. They epitomize everything that is wrong with this country.
AMEN to this spot-on comment.
Not just your country, ugh. I wonder if this will be the Australian cover, too? I don’t pay attention to this magazine…not their demographic.
Is it the light reflecting, or did Kim get a cheap-as manicure? And ha! – she’s not centre-stage, but relegated to the “side-piece”. They look so plastic. All of them. When, oh when is this thing with overdrawing already heavily-filled lips going to end? We have eyes. We can see what’s going on, FFS. How shiny are their legs? Am I doing something wrong? My legs are not shiny. I wonder how long ago these photos were taken, and/or how much photoshopping went on? There was a story in DM yesterday saying Kris said Caitlyn can just go and eff off. I only read the headline, though. It must be difficult making their own “transition” (for want of a better word) along with Caitlyn. Not many of us will ever find ourselves having to do that.
“All of the ladies lucky/unlucky enough to fall out of Kris’s demon biscuit.”… I had to stop to thoroughly clean my screen and mop up my surroundings, after guffawing and spraying my afternoon cuppa of Yorkshire tea everywhere. Kaiser, this is too funny.
I’ve been calling them that for a year now. They ARE the most famous American family and WHY is a mystery to me. I don’t understand why the masses adore them to the extent of idolization. They are trashy self-absorbed narcissistic materialistic no talent except for self-promotion people. America should be ashamed.
We’re living in self absorbed narcissistic materialist times. For millions of people their lives revolve around how they look ,twitter and instagram. That’s what the Kardashians do. Their fans can relate to them.
It’s because they buy all these magazine’s off plus PMK/ blackmailed – Kanye/ bullies them but rating don’t lie. They are failing and hated. Hopefully wasting all the this cash on publicty will be thier undoing as the fan base evaporates: )
OMG how awful! So AMERICA is represented to the world by Donald Trump, the Kardashians, and mass murders.
Last month daughter had just arrived in Singapore and the first thing the cab driver said to her is, “you have a lot of killings, yes?”
If they are the first family, America has jumped the shark.
The first family of ratchet.
True words.
Yeah. I would have titled that photo: “World’s Most Successful Madam and her Stable”.
HAHAHA
The First Family of Trash yes..notorious not famous…must have been a typo or maybe they left out the word “trash” since Cosmo is such a classy rag..I mean mag.
More infamous than famous.
Does anyone remember when Cosmo was the risque girls magazine? I am dating myself (over 40) I wonder what Helen Gurley Brown would think of this? Cosmo has gone so downhill. I used to love reading it. Guys would read it too!
I remember! I miss the old school covers and the “quizzes”. Cosmo was such a naughty treat back in the day. Yep…dating myself as well…almost 49! Which by the way, how did that happen? Seems I was just bemoaning my 30th b-day. As for the Kardashians…I don’t get the fascination. Except for Khloe. Khloe seems interesting to me for some reason.
I think HGB would love it..Cosmo has always been the slightly trashy sister of women’s mags
Cosmo now is actually trying to become a serious, topical women’s mag. They now have writers who cover feminism, reproductive rights, abortion, birth control, etc. The problem is that it’s still written in a totally stupid, insulting way that presumes that women are 1.) all still going out and totally looking to get some and 2.) young and not incredibly smart. If you’re going to be a serious magazine, then be one. If you’re a frivolous mag about makeup and clothes and sex, be that (and that’s not a bad thing). But jeez, pick one! Every time I pick one up at the dentist, it’s an exercise in schizophrenia. It’s like it’s trying so hard to be a serious feminist thing now, and it’s failing so badly.
Konspiracy Theory……………Why is Khloe the only blonde?
And what is up with Kim’s left hand? Photoshop fail!
@kcarp; Kuz Kris Kanoodled…..old news Khloe has a different daddy.
Just….ugh.
My problem isn’t with the Kardashians, per se (although I am not a fan by any means). I really dislike that they have such strong media domination when there are so many people – in the arts and outside of it – that would be far more deserving of a magazine cover.
There are plenty of actresses, celebrities and public figures who use their place in the media to at least try to draw attention to real issues and causes and those kind of become associated with them. I can’t think off the top of my head a single charity, cause or any other major issue that the Kardashians have championed or even addressed. They have such a gigantic platform, but they seem to use it for nothing other than self-promotion. And yeah, calling them America’s “first family” certainly does seem like a gross statement.
“I can’t think off the top of my head a single charity, cause or any other major issue that the Kardashians have championed or even addressed. They have such a gigantic platform, but they seem to use it for nothing other than self-promotion.”
I think about this all the time when their name comes up. Disgusting vile people to have all that wealth and instead of donating to hurting people or a very good cause, they would rather wrap their luxury vehicles in velvet. No respect for that level of entitlement and materialistic narcissism.
I got really disgusted when Kim married Kris Humphries and they publicized her wedding registry. There was SO. MUCH. STUFF on it, and most of it was crazy expensive! So many other celebs request donations to a charity in lieu of gifts (they do that for babies too – Nicole Richie and Joel Madden refused all the gifts and gave them to a DV shelter instead). When she divorced him less than 3 months later, she didn’t return anything, but assured people that she made a “donation” to a charity of her choice (let’s remember that her mom operates a “church” that takes donations). It’s crazy. There are so many genuinely generous celebrities who actually do use fame for a decent cause, but this family is the opposite of that.
This comment is actually addressed to Sam but there is no “Reply” button.
There was a rumor floating around about the wedding gifts that did not get delivered on time. Dimbuttcile went to the store after she filed for divorce, returned all the gifts and got store credit which she used to buy Rolexes for family members. Then there was the Ferrari/Lamborghini (can’t remember which) that was gifted to Dimmie and KH that she picked up. No word on what happened to that car.
Cosmopolitan should be ashamed, and people who keep buying what these idiots are selling should be ashamed.
Hilarious.
Haha – ‘demon biscuit’
Why aren’t they wearing pants? Can’t they be what the mag claims fully dressed? I feel old.
It’s Cosmo, who cares? Trash covering trash.
Sooooo the kardashians are being called the first family now. The end of the world is my only shimer of happiness now
With media outlets using terms like ‘first family’ it ensures the over-exposure of this clan will continue.
They are not going away anytime soon, because Seacrest has turned his Merv Griffin benefits into all-Kardashian all the time.
All of Kim’s face-work makes her look like a mouth-breather. Sadly, Kylie looks 40, as usual. Kourtney has the dead-eyed look of someone who has spent years in an emotionally abusive relationship. Kendall and Khloe look nice, though Khloe no longer looks like her old self.
Like someone (Gore Vidal?) said about some other family (the Gabors?), “Vulgarity is their art.”
My eyes go right to Kendall and Kylie, which I guess was the point.
It’s Cosmopolitan Magazine
I haven’t read Cosmo since they claimed a heterosexual woman couldn’t contract HIV/AIDS
Their heads are not in proportion to one another…bad photoshop.
Also, first family of what?
“16 pages like you’ve never seen them before!” – oh so you mean reading books and acting classy?
Ha ha “Easy workout for an epic ass” how ironic that’s on the cover with them. Yeah it’s super easy, just pay a doc to inject fat and sculp your ass any way you want !
lol I didn’t catch that. Good one!
the funny this is that the cover and the other photo are almost identical too. Only the oldest daughter has a different expression
Is it really a picture of the Kartrashians if there are no inflated bums to be seen?
Kanye wasnt available that day!! LOL!!
I didn’t even think of that! ROTFL! What a wag you are, and so true.
That second pic, all I see are legs…long photoshopped to death legs. It’s nice cosmo made these women all the same color of “fake tan”…so kind of them.
America made them happen
No. Just no.
Is Kylie angry or is her face frozen from the Botox. She needs to listen to Tyra Banks and practice her poses in the mirror because she is a major fail. So sad that this girl tries to strike up a Greta Garbo pose at 18. Damn that Kris Jenner truly is the Antichrist.
If they’re America’s First Family – God help America.
Well, that’s embarrassing.
ummm how are Kendall and Kris sitting with their legs?
Slight typo. Should be:
First Dysfunctional Family
Are people really so unobservant that they can’t see how much these women have always disliked each other? It’s not a close, warm family. It’s all a business relationship. Even Khloe admitted that before the show, they hardly saw each other. Lessee: Kourtney can hardly stand to be in the same room with Demon Mother. Kim clings to Demon Mother while also hating her, she is easily led and is shifting from kontrol by DM to kontrol by krazy Kanye. But Kim doesn’t really like anybody, she finds her phone far more interesting than her family. Khloe tries to sabotage everybody else’s relationships and also hates Demon Mother while also desperate for DM’s approval. Kylie was convinced by the Koven by the age of nine that she was physically defective but it could be “fixed”. Kendall doesn’t seem to be sure whether she should run for the hills or hang close to the Koven and Demon Mother’s ability to generate money on commission. Both Kylie and Kendall were raised by teenage nanny Khloe. Rob wants the Koven money but hates Kim (and Kim hates Rob), and has not yet abandoned the pointless hope of getting attention from Demon Mother although he has managed to get away from their omnipresent cameras by gaining weight (the only mortal sin in the Koven).
Of the next generation in the Koven: Kourtney’s kids have a chance of escaping the Kult, but Kim’s kids are pretty much doomed unless a couple of wolves adopt them.
+1000
@jwoolman: Yes and No. Agree they weren’t close before the show, but it has been on for like six or seven years, so they are around each other more. It is obvious there is tension between Kim and everyone. Like they’re afraid of her. This chick chose to be a stay at home housewife at 20, so once again I agree PMK has control and Kimmie is her fav…blatantly obvious. Correct that Kylie is defective, don’t think she can be fixed, Kendall pretty oblivious to them all now since she is a genuine supermodel I’m sure much to Kim’s dismay and correct Kim hates Rob and takes hits at him whenever she can. Khloe has a different father and is overtly sensitive and still talks in that baby voice at 30, Peter Pan syndrome. We can’t believe Kim was the first slore, that honor goes to PMK. Kourtney is boring and benefits the most financially from the show. They’re very lucky but so exposed it’s beyond pathetic. Other sure fact is that I used the word obvious about 250 times.
The most accurate description i have read about this family.
BRAVO!
Not to mention that all of them are either super depressed and/or a robot.
PMK: Depressed
Kim: Robot
Kourtney: Depressed and robot
Khloe: Depressed
Kendall: semi-robot, but more stable than the rest
Kylie: Depressed super robot. “Must become Kim 2.0. Must become Kim 2.0.”
Sock: Super depressed.
They are literally a sad group of people, all with so much baggage, emotional issues, fake faces and bodies and I would bet they cry themselves to sleep more times than not. No one to look up to in that family. The most I would recommend is you-tubing their eye makeup tips for a night out or Halloween, thats it.
I don’t know if I buy PMK being depressed. Her daughters are still bring in the money. She’s got everything she ever dreamed of right now.
The damage to the kids all seems to come from Demon Mother, who herself seems to be a functional alcoholic. Not sure if Demon Mother is capable of enough feeling to be depressed, but maybe so.
Sock Kardashian, hahahaha. 🙂
I saw KUWTK for the first time last week and to be honest I was quite entertained.
It was an old episode where the charisma vacuum was preggo with the 2nd kid.
CHILLING!
And look how okay the mother’s nose looks like when fixed with photoshop.
Seacrest hath wrought this pseudo-celebrity scourge upon us, and needs to make amends to humanity for the pain he has caused.
Kosmopolitan.
This family makes me so sick. I will never ever understand how there are people who love and respect them.
I completely agree. How do they have fans? Seriously, this is one of life’s great mysteries.
So much plastic surgeries in one photo.
and let’s not forget photoshop
And you can still see their ugliness.
I think they appeal to the passive aggressive gossipy shallow trashy people.
If they really are America´s first family, USA has reached the new bottom. Sorry, but it is true.
They are America’s first family because of sites like this one that constantly talk about these dip-shits everyday! Same as Donald Trump. They wouldn’t be where they are without an audience YOU DUMB ASSES!
and you clicked on the link and even commented?
First Family of Ho’s. There I fixed the headline.
Another great example of the lying media declaring these people “first family”. Media no longer is based on truth. They write something and the public is supposed to believe it even when we know it’s garbage. They can’t be first when the majority of people are sick of and disgusted by them. Fake and materialistic built on hype is all they are. They have gotten rich off of the concept, as has Seacrest, so of course they still promote the lie.
Kourtney’s hair looks limp and awful
I wish that the press would just stop covering this vapid family. I can’t imagine how the rest of the world views us with them in the news all the time.
Those famewhores need to disappear off the face of the earth so we can have some real news.
Just in time for Halloween; they are WHORific.