If you’re in a need of a good laugh and you have a good 30 minutes, I would definitely suggest that you read Noel Gallagher’s Esquire UK cover story – go here for the full piece. He covers the December issue and his interview is… well, amazing. It’s not that I agree with him on most things, and it’s not that he’s some truth-telling savant. He’s just pissy, bitchy, scathing, ridiculous, conceited, self-aware and really, really funny. Here are some highlights:
His hobby is doing interviews: “This is my hobby! This: doing interviews. I f–king love it. I could do this all day long. It’s sick. Because I get to be a gobshite, and I get to do that thing: to be the last of a dying breed.”
His childhood: “I laugh when I hear people moaning about their childhoods. It’s usually middle-class people. I think, “mine was worse.” Mine was wrapped up in violence and drunkenness and there was no money. And still we didn’t go around f–king robbing people. We stole things, we didn’t rob people. It’s preposterous to say you’re working class when your back garden is bigger than the f–king street you grew up on. But it’s always there. Do I feel working class? In my soul, I guess I do.”
On Radiohead: “Am I aware of a hierarchy? I’m aware that Radiohead have never had a f–king bad review. I reckon if Thom Yorke f–king sh-t into a light bulb and started blowing it like an empty beer bottle it’d probably get 9 out of 10 in f–king Mojo. I’m aware of that.”
The rock star life: “We’d be partying with supermodels and all sorts. It’d be like, “We’re out of cigs. Who’s gonna go to the shop?” “No way. Press are outside.” So, you just go out and say to one of the kids, “Do us a f–king favour: go round the Tescos and get us 400 Benson and Hedges, can you?” In the Nineties, all of us were high on f–king cocaine, all the time. Having it. The last party. Nobody gave a f–k. I haven’t got a “My Drug Hell” story because it was f-king brilliant.”
He enjoys being famous: “The fame thing, some people it hits them hard. I flourished. I love it. I’ve never gone out of my way to be famous and I don’t go to the opening of a f–king envelope but if somebody wants to lend me their superyacht just because I’m famous, “Thanks very much, man.” I do enjoy that side of it and you should f–king enjoy it. I f–king hate whingeing rock stars. And I hate pop stars who are just… neh. Just nothing, you know? “Oh, yeah, my last selfie got 47-thousand-million likes on Instagram.” Yeah, why don’t you go f–k off and get a drug habit, you penis?
He loves Kanye West & hates everybody else. “I’ll tell you what’s wrong. Fame’s wasted on these c–ts today. Bar Kanye. You watch him on the MTV Awards and you think, “You can f–king stay, you’re alright.” Does anybody give a f–k about what any of these current pop stars are up to? Who gives a sh-t what f–king One Direction do? C–ksuckers, all of them in rehab by the time they’re 30. Who gives a sh-t what Ellie Goulding is up to? Really? Adele, what? Blows my f–king mind. It blows my f–king mind. Nobody cares! Fame’s wasted on them, with their f–king in-ear monitors and their electronic cigarettes. And their fragrances that they’re bringing out for Christmas. You f–king dicks.
On Harry Styles. “Harry Styles has got nothing to say for himself – nothing. “You alright, mate?” “Uhhh.” That’s it.
The ‘90s were the best. “It’s no coincidence that all the big people from the Nineties lasted. I’ve been in festivals all summer – every one of them has been headlined by someone from the Nineties. That’s why Kate Moss has transcended eras. No one’s taken her place.
On Chris Martin. “Chris Martin is a friend of mine. That f–king guy can write a tune. And he’s hilarious, by the way. We were out one night having dinner, me and my missus, him and his missus, and he ended up banging his hand on the table, shouting at me: “Why do you think it’s so cool not to give a f–k?” Because he does give a f–k. About everything. I might have been making some disparaging comment about f–king Madonna or someone, and he was like, “I just can’t believe you can be like that.” And I was like, “F–king believe it, man, because I can’t believe you can be like that.”
I’m just excerpting the stuff about other people/artists, but he says so much more about everything else. I thought some of the most touching stuff was about how he loves his wife and how much he loves to spend time with women. As for the bashing of everyone else… Noel already burned a ton of bridges earlier this year with a Rolling Stone interview, but with this interview, it’s like he was pouring salt in all of the wounds. I love it though – I wish more people would give these kinds of interviews.
Photos courtesy of Esquire UK.
Well this has been should know. Shut up.
He’s a massive douche but pretty entertaining to read.
Radiohead are a bunch of musical geniuses.
Amen.
Yep. And they never respond to Noel’s one-sided diss because they’re classy like that.
Love it! Thanks!
Worked out so well for him….squandering one of the most lucrative musical opportunities of the past decade because he and his drug habit couldn’t play nice with other humans. STFU. There are PLENTY of good musicians out there who can manage to hold it together AND to their jobs.
Liam screwed it up.
They’re pretty sucky at their jobs actually, so something’s off.
I don’t think he has an actual drug habit. I think he did drugs, but didn’t develop a habit, if that makes any sense. But I think he’s off them now.
I thought it was his brother that actually screwed it up? They’re both a-holes, but Noel’s always been the lesser of 2 evils.
I disagree with basically everything he stands for but must admit he’s entertaining.
Yeah, he’s cool. Good for him. He’s not overly brain damaged from his drug daze…sadly he’s the exception and not the rule. Let it be known, however, that the king of “Drugs ARe Awesome”, Hunter Thompson, was in kidney and renal failure, picked up the phone and told his young wife to listen to the sound of him killing himself. DRugs are sooooo cool.
He’s such an annoying attention seeker. I doubt he believes most of what he says but he loves the attention it brings him.
Cackling. I’m f.king cackling.
Yes! Cackling is exactly the word I was looking for.
That was some f_cking interview. Noel had a f_cking lot to get off his f_cking chest.
@FINGERBINGER 😂😂😂😂😂
“And their fragrances that they’re bringing out for Christmas. You f–king dicks” this line just cracked me up. He always gives interesting interviews.
At the very least, he’s not wrong about the fragrances! This guy is super entertaining.
lol! that line got me too.
I also loved, “…You penis!” So simple, yet so effective.
I will be spending the entire weekend laughing at these quotes, so thank you!
I read his Esquire interview last night. I got a chuckle out of it. I love Noel. There’s no rockers in the younger generation that say anything outrageous ever and no feuds amongst the band members that spill out, like Keith and Mick back in the day or even over recent years, or John and Paul, or about each other talking smack. Everything is so bland about rock bands now.
He’s like a stream of consciousness in that full interview and entertained me.
I actually like his solo work after Oasis as High Flying Birds.
I seem to be the only one amongst my friends, but I f-cking LOVE High Flying Birds. Beautiful second album.
His advice to Zayn Malik is still my favourite:
Get a good accountant because life is f-king long.
This quote is what I thought of when I heard Jerry Hall is now dating Rupert Murdoch. Maybe she can’t get a good accountant?
And I love this.
“Every ludicrous thing I’ve ever said, I accepted the consequences because I don’t think I’ve ever said, “Oh, it was taken out of context, that.” Fucking wankers say that.”
@Jayne That might become my favorite quote ever! You f_cking own your f_cking words, you f_cking wankers!
There are too many quotes to choose from. My favorite is about Liam, “He’s the angriest person you’ll ever meet. He’s a man with a fork in world of soup” . Classic!
“He’s a man with a fork in world of soup”
Yes, that has to be the best quote ever.
If Noel diss my favorite band/singer, I’d still laugh about it. Love him.
K, so, Coldplay good, Radiohead bad, got it. Good thing his taste is still parallel to his talent. Always good to do you.
Yeah, that one left me a bit “WOW”, I can really trust your taste…
And his comments on drugs, I mean… He tries to come across as this rebellious person who doesn’t give a f*ck, but his take on drugs made me feel uncomfortable. There’s nothing glamorous about drugs and his bashing rock starts who went through hell bc of it doesn’t sit well with me. If anything, I think it’s important when rock starts are open about how shitty drugs are instead of having the attitude that they were the cool ones and the others who fell of the wagon were just idiots. Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but that part bothered me.
Yeah he is trying to be funny but no nothing awesome about drugs. He is lucky bc it seems like he got out of it unharmed but how many people’s lives have been ruined from that kind of partying ? I mean we are not talking about weed he is talking cocaine and that it was brilliant. Also he didn’t have to involve Adele in this lol
I read up the whole interview and what he said was this: “I haven’t got a “My Drug Hell” story because it was f–king brilliant. [But] what happened was I started getting massive panic attacks. You think you’re going to die. So I stopped. I haven’t done it since ’98. I did one line maybe, a couple of years after I gave up, because I was pissed and I had to sober up quickly. And I haven’t touched it since. It is a shit drug.”
It’s not that bad after all. He is full of sass but when you read the whole context he doesn’t come across as bad.
The thing is, Radiohead is brillint, but they can do whatever shite and and we’re sure it’s gonna get raving reviews while Chris Martin, not mater what he does, is gonna get bashed. It’s not objective anymore. It’s tiresome.
Very confused. Did he just advise people to get on drugs because thats cooler than wingheing?????? Some of the stuff is funny so I am not sure if should take him seriously
Also it’s easy for him to talk like that bc he had his chance in fame before social media. Good luck trying to make it today without worrying about posting on social media constantly. You’d disappear.
I don’t. He is a soundbite. Whenever I feel down I just head for a quote.
he is the king of slag, apparently.
lol.
I don’t think he’s advocating drug taking per se.
He’s saying they are all whinging over stupid things or don’t have anything to whinge about, so they sould go do something stupid or dangerous, like take drugs, THEN they *will* have something to whinge about. Or maybe they’ll be more interesting in a trainwreck sort of way.
OK yeah I mean the interview is funny overall but I still feel like he is been lucky bc he got famous at a time when he didn’t have to be on social media and scrutinized daily about a quote or something he posted or papped constantly. I think the stars of his time and older were mostly idolized and had massive amounts of fun without anyone criticizing them like people do now so he has the luxury to talk like that
“(…)he has the luxury to talk like that.”
Alana, I think that describes the whole interview ^_^
He makes me laugh (not in a bad way) but I do think the demands of pop are different from rock (which is his genre). It’s a little weird to expect One Direction or Taylor Swift to behave the same way as the Rolling Stones.
I’m surprised he likes Chris Martin so much since I think of Coldplay as more of a pop group than rock one. And, uh, he was married to Gwyneth — who probably stands for everything Noel hates.
Coldplay are the last brit pop band, but I cannot stand them. So, that and the comment about mister West were… interesting. Noel and his big mouth. He is funny, but only if you know his music. Otherwise, you might get offended.
So he hasn’t changed at all since the 1990s. Ok.
He has a lot of stuff to say about things he doesn’t give a f@ck about…hmm.
It’s grumpy old man syndrome!
I wouldn’t say so. He’s always been like that.
love Noel. he is all about rock when it comes to music, but he is a gossip type. he likes gossip. he likes to answer questions. he is still the same, though his personal life is not messy anymore. so, he did grow up, just not that much. this is nothing, remember the time he said he wished Albarn and Graham caught AIDS? crazy old Noel.
OMG you’re bringing me back re: Oasis v. Blur. I was a huge Blur nerd.. loved Graham. Lol. Widely mocked for it as well.
Blur won overall. They did manage to step away from the original sound, which is why they are in a league of their own. But I still like Noel, he is raw talent, Damon has very great sense for business, as well as talent, but Graham has soul. Loved him and Pete Doherty performing together, they are an amazing match. They should totally make more songs along with Barat.
I am a complete nerd when it comes to music, I cannot forgive myself for giving up on the piano.
He’s so whiny and bitchy… I love it. Everything that comes out of his mouth is gold, I want him to write a book where he just consistently complains and insults everyone in the music industry.
I second this:)
Yes, please 🙂
Omg. He’s insufferable. Bye Felicia!
I hear you kaiser, I disagree with 90% of the things he said (tho I agree that in the critics’ eyes, Yorke can do no wrong) but in this day and age it’s so refreshing to just see someone outrageously outspoken like that.
He’s so funny! I’m being completely serious here.
Find him amusing in the same way I find Keith Richards amusing, grumpy old git like.
Too young to have a strong relationship with his music but his song was covered by a little known singer in the new John Lewis xmas ad.
I literally cried when I listened to it😪
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wuz2ILq4UeA
I find it interesting when people who dish pop and boybands claim to be part of bad ass rock when actually that’s debatable. Oasis aren’t classic rock at all, they are much more indie or pop rock, closer to the Taylor Swifts of the world then to Rolling Stones or AC/DC.
I find this to be rather…odd. To see people like him and Grace Jones carry on about the lack of talent or originality in today’s artists is understandable. People often think that the of the generation that follows theirs is sub-par, but sometimes it comes off as being nasty just for the hell of it. I don’t find Adele to be all that interesting, in fact I wonder if she didn’t have this mystique about her would people really be as interested in her, but I’m not about to work myself into a frenzy over it. I think interviews like these are really about shock value. It gets people talking, and in some ways it’s just as disingenuous as the people they complain about. You can not like someone and still get your point across without being so disparaging.
It’s strange that people call this kind of cattiness just being “real.” If Nicki Minaj or Ariana Grande did the same thing they’d be entitled brats. I think some of the problem with today’s artists is they see this kind of behavior and try to emulate it because it’s seen as cool, only to be torn down because they “haven’t earned the right.”
“I think interviews like these are really about shock value.” He knows it and he enjoys it. Having the freedom to say what you want is truly amazing but he uses his power just for the sake of being “the last of his kind”.
I actually do agree with him about the lack of everything in today’s music. I really only listen to 80s and 90s music and maybe a bit of early 2000s and I’m the type who would listen to anything as long as I enjoy it. I’ve loved alternative music since the 80s. I listen to alternative stations on my Pandora account but I just cannot get into modern alternative music, save for some bands like alt-J and Bloc Party – but they are mainly alternative dance. I remember buying REM’s first couple of albums when they first came out.
Sigh. I miss music that matters (to me, anyway).
He is right about most of the music, but he likes Coldplay and dishes Tom York… and while he has a point about Radiohead being darlings of the critics, in general he is antagonistic about everyone. There are many ways to express his opinion but he chooses to really show how much he doesn’t care when obviously he does.
Commercial radio doesn’t do the job for us. I feel that nowadays we really have to look for what we like and find interesting, bc the ones who are doing interesting stuff can’t compete with the Taylor Swift, boybands or Coldpaly. They don’t have money to spend on marketing their work.
Look at Robyn, the swedish singer who is actually pop but in my opinion does something that is fresh, or Black Keys who play blues rock and are actually known or even The Darkness that people think were a novelty focused on catsuits but who actually play great classic rock, give mind blowing live concerts and are becoming a cult band. And I’m not even giving examples of artists no one knows about, but it seems that unless someone is BIG IN THE WHOLE WORLD and everybody talks about it, everything else is a desert and that’s not true. I basically feel that the argument that nothing good is being done at the present is a perception created by what we see in mass media and not tells the whole story.
*Sorry for the rant, not sure if I came across that eloquent*
@sofia: I think anyone can say what’s on their mind nowadays. It’s encouraged actually, but maybe a lot of that comes down to PR and the image celebrities want to lay out for the world to see. Do you mean last of his kind as in the last of his generation? I can think of a few artists that speak their minds as freely as he does. Azealia Banks comes to mind
@BGE: I definitely hear you there. I grew up in the 90’s, so music from the 80’s to the mid 00’s contains many of my favorite albums of all time. I have eclectic tastes, so while I can’t get into most of the big names now, I still manage to find music I like. I’ve been into Bjork since I was a teen, and I’ve recently gotten into Submotion Orchestra and Electric Wire Hustle.
I understand what you say, but as an example a few days ago Adele gave an interview that i found refreshing and not PR contrived and she actually was supportive of female artists and said some truths about Taylor Swift in a gracious way. I don’t even like her music but did appreciate her apparent authenticity. To me Noel just seems to enjoy to come across as rude which in the end is excusable because in his mind he is telling some truths. He probably thinks that no one in “rock” says the thing he says, that’s why I wrote “the last of his kind”. But the whole dynamic of Oasis was about conflict, so this isn’t a surprise.
EDIT: I went back to my first comment and what I meant by people being free to tell want they want was that he is already famous and rich and has the luxury to be able to annoy people without fearing any consequences. many people can’t do that or even if they can they feel differently.
For any Noel fans, Noel had been invited on stage with U2 two weeks ago at their London gig on tour and performed I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For together and added a little bit of All You Need is Love at the end. It was fantastic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlqFrPbkRVc
This is brilliant, hilarious, awesome, inspiring, and so much TRUTH. Too bad Oasis was always too bland for my tastes.
ROCK N ROLL 4 EVA!!!
Oasis was never original anyway they were Beatles /stone roses copycats. He wrote some nice tunes but hes hardly original No wonder he likes coldplay because they are the bland watered down version of Radiohead early less challenging work.
that is not really fair. Noel and Liam are proud fans of both bands, but they are not copycats. Noel writes his music, he does not steal, apart from few obvious tributes like the beginning of Don’t Look Back In Anger. Suede, Blur and Oasis changed music history. It was all about grunge, but then some strange force came from the UK and they were everywhere, from indie bands you got something old mixed with something new. Wonderful time for music. There were Radiohead and Garbage, who are still amazing, they were somewhere in between, they also brought electronic music into their raw sound, just wonderful. Mixed with trip hop, we had so much genres merging, and Noel was part of it, he worked with Goldie.
All hail the King of Ultimate Bitchiness! I love him btw. I agree with the idea that he should write a book. Too bad he turned down judging The X Factor because he would have been brilliant at that.
Yeah, he would have been funny, but I think he would have hated it for all the lack of rock contestants. Apparently his daughter was really mad that he didn’t take the gig.
This is a quote from his earlier RS interview this year that I loved regarding the Grammy Kanye/Beck controversy.
“What did you think of Kanye West’s statement that Beck should “respect artistry” and give his Album of the Year award to Beyoncé?
“He’s a character, I’ll give him that. And I love his track “Black Skinhead.” But somebody needs to buy that dumbass a dictionary so he can look up the word “artistry.” Beck can play the banjo, for fuck’s sake. Nobody plays the banjo! Get him a dictionary from me, I’ll fuckin’ sign it and give it to him so he can look it up. “
I LOVE Noel! I’m a huge Oasis fan and have seen Noel solo half a dozen times (and even have a tattoo of some of his lyrics). He’s so brutally honest and unlike most spineless pop stars, doesn’t backtrack. He owns his bitchiness.
Most people in NA think of him/Oasis as has-beens but they’re still hugely popular in the UK and Europe.
Too true
F*ck YES! That was a fantastic read, I love him now. I just can’t believe he’s friends with the human boiled potato Chris Martin though.. ugh.
Can they get him to host the Oscars?
As someone who has been listening to rock music since the sixties I had little patience for this guy and the music him and others like him seemed to play. I called it, “whine rock”. No time for it, no time for him and no time to even read anything further past the article’s header above.
Miss 90s Britpop. I STILL listen to mostly 80s and 90s music too.