Full disclosure: I was unaware of who Jonathan Cheban was prior to writing this article. Since I try to fly outside of the Jenner-Kardashian galaxy except for my writing duties here, I am kind of glad I didn’t know about him.
For those of you in the same boat, Jonathan is a reality television presence. He started the timer on his 15 minutes of fame on Keeping Up with the Kardashians and also made a appearances on the show’s many (unnecessary) spinoffs. He got his own reality show on E! (‘natch), in 2010. The Spin Crowd, which only lasted one season. The show revolved around the trials and tribulations of Jonathan and his staff at the public relations firm he founded, CommandPR. He also appeared on the UK shows Celebrity Big Brother and Celebs Go Dating. (Playing fast and loose with that “celebrity” moniker, aren’t we?) Jonathan recently played Sonny to Kim Kardashian’s Cher at the Casamigos Halloween party.
In addition to his television appearances, the Russian-born 43-year-old is an entrepreneur, launching his own clothing line, selling a line of jewelry and opening a few eateries, most recently a Shake Shack-esque fast food restaurant called Burger Bandit on Long Island. He considers himself a foodie and lifestyle expert, dubbing himself the Foodgōd and using his website and social media to alert us on all of the best and trendiest eats around. From what I can gather, Jonathan really likes pizza and sweets – not that there’s anything wrong with that. I would have thought that a “food god” would also be an authority on haute cuisine as well. Maybe that’s just me.
In a video on the New York Post‘s website, Jonathan visits Krave It, a Queens eatery, where he samples some of their pizzas with owner (and from what he puts on his pizzas – Flamin’ Cheetos, anyone? – possibly a man with his weed dealer on speed dial), Vishee Mandahar. Apparently, the restaurant’s “pizza de resistance” (sorry, couldn’t resist) is the “Three Course Pizza” a monstrosity covered in fries, onion rings, burger patties, bacon, burger buns and deep-fried Oreos and topped with powdered sugar and barbecue sauce. What the actual hell? This looks like the work of a stoner (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Apparently, Jonathan objected to the sauce and requested it be left off of his pie. All of those bizarre toppings on one pie and it’s the barbecue sauce that has you in a tizzy? Ummm…okay. When Vishee went to drizzle the sauce, Jonathan exclaimed, “Oh really? Ugh,” requesting the sauce be left off but claiming “I don’t want to ruin your creation.”
I guess he did ruin it (I thought it was ruined with the powdered sugar/fried Oreo combo blech), as he sampled a sauce-less slice and then another culinary disaster disguised as a pizza featuring fried egg cheeseburger pizza with bacon, fries, chipotle, cilantro (ew in itself) and two different kinds of cheese. I love food and have watched my share of Epic Meal Time and Hellthy Junk Food videos, but these border on the ridiculous… meaning something I probably would have devoured in college.
The hero of the day in the Post video isn’t Vishee and it certainly isn’t Jonathan, who comes off as slightly douchey… it’s the guy who obviously has no idea who Jonathan is, and when is informed that he’s “Foodgōd” asks “What made him the food god? Is he self-appointed? Did we vote on this god?” You, my friend, win the internet for today (in my book).
I don’t know about you, but I like barbecue sauce on a pizza – of course, I’m only thinking about California Pizza Kitchen’s BBQ Chicken Pizza (and the Lean Cuisine knock-off, which isn’t too bad for a frozen, diet pizza). Who’s with me on this?
Photos: Instagram, WENN.com
He’s so annoying!
Yes, he is, but he’s actually the only one to make fun of Kim on Kim’s face, so that’s funny.
Did he come into some extra pocket money recently? I mean, to afford being written about on a gossip site? Or is it just really slow news day?
Thought numero dos, I am a pretentious foodie and I turn my nose up at all those pizzas. There is a balanced way to mix savoury and sweet. For example, I still crave the truffle, arugula, porcini and honey pizza where I used to work. This weirdo pizza, with the Oreos and powdered sugar, just sounds like a publicity grab like the croissushi. The donuts look ok, and that unicorn sundae looks pretty but would taste not great, just like unicorn everything.
This has been my very important take on a very important man doing very important things.
Ps. Corey, I’m sorry you do not enjoy the absolute heaven that is cilantro. That’s a travesty.
Oh my god, that truffle pizza sounds amazing.
Cilantro is good, but I’m that side that doesn’t think it has a powerful or awful flavor.
Which is more gross: The “Three Course Pizza “or Jonathan ?
It’s a toss up
Jonathan definitely is more gross than the pizza.
I still remember when Kim was trying to smear her second husband (the basketball player who wanted an annulment) and sent out a guy in a basketball uniform to oh so carefully dump some flour on Jonathan, allegedly in the ex’s name. That didn’t get enough of a response (probably partially because everybody would like to toss flour at Jonathan), so Kim had to arrange to get flour tossed at herself by an “anti-fur activist”. Again oh, so carefully so she could quickly clean up and make a prescripted funny statement to the media about it instead of going ballistic as is normal for Kim if really caught by surprise. If you watched the video, you could see the activist slowly heading toward Kim in full view of security, which were holding back, and her mom likewise. Kim was even wearing leather rather than fur for easier cleanup.
Anyway, Jonathan is complicit with Kim shenanigans.
He is wrong. Lol There a Mom and pops style pizza place in my city that has a BBQ chicken pizza to die for.
CPK has a great barbecue pizza.
No to all this. I’m old school. Once you get beyond a certain list of traditional toppings it ceases to be pizza and becomes round bread with random crap on top.
He’s an example of someone who’d be nothing if he wasn’t friends with or related to a famous person. Without Kim, he wouldn’t be the “food god” or making these stupid videos, he might just be a regular guy working at a restaurant or grocery store to be around all of the food he loves to eat
He’s a moron for many reasons, and BBQ pizza is amazing. Corey, I also feel like someone touting themselves as a gourmet or foodie or “Foodgōd” (massive eyeroll) or whatever should eat fancier things than stoner pizza and unicorn treats that look like they came from those Delish videos that are the scourge of my Facebook timeline.
He’s too stupid to realize that with the long vowel sign over the o, the name would be pronounced, “food goad.”
Rolling my eyes so hard.
That’s what I thought too, Stupid douche. He has so f’d up his original face it’s unbelievable. Hard to believe he’s 43.
His face is a blend of Kris and Scott.
But on a side note: add nacho cheese Doritos to homemade burritos. It’s amazing.
I really don’t get the point of this article. It looks like a paid advert on a gossip website.
(unless the point was that someone decided to destroy pizza by adding cheeseburgers to it, in which case, thank you)
I accidentally came across an episode of his PR reality show years ago and he was telling a perfectly-cute young woman who had just started working for him that she needed to get a nose job. I’ve hated him ever since.
Does the dummy realize that by putting a long sign over the O in Foodgod, that makes it Food-GOAD?
I’ve never wanted to punch a face so hard as I want to punch his.
No, no, no! Flamin’ Cheetos do not belong on a pizza!
Now, regular Cheetos, preferably delicately crumbled, make a fine addition to pizza, mac&cheese, potato salad, macaroni salad, pea soup, sandwiches… basically anything savory. Fritos corn chips are also excellent in soup or with hummus or in tacos etc. But I would stick with Cheetos or potato chips for sandwiches and the rest on the Cheetos list above (except for pizza, who would put potato chips on pizza?!? There are limits.)
Also on the advice of a character in the animated Alladin tv series, I tried gumdrops on a cheese pizza. Not really that bad. Probably regular gumdrops would work better than the spicy ones I tried, and also I should have chopped them up a bit rather than festooning the pizza with them whole. But that’s how the cartoon showed it. And I was not ten years old… Probably in my thirties or so.
Ugh he makes my skin crawl.
He’s got Paris Hilton eyes, ie two completely different sizes and shapes.