I keep wondering why we get these spates of breastfeeding stories and then I remember that it’s Breastfeeding Awareness Month so – duh, me. The latest mom to weigh in on the ups and downs of breastfeeding is Gisele Bündchen, who is mom to Benjamin, nine, and Vivian, six. On Friday, Gisele posted the beautiful shot above to Instagram with the following caption:
One of the most special moments I’ve shared with my kids was while breastfeeding. That special look you get, that feeling of connection is unlike anything I have ever experienced.
I love how #breastfeedingawarenessmonth shines a light on the importance of breastfeeding. Yes, in the beginning it can be difficult, it can hurt (the cracks, bleeding, engorgement), but no matter how challenging, I would not change that experience for anything in this world. I feel blessed that I was able to nourish them in this way. Congratulations to all mamas out there for the effort that we put in, the ones who breastfeed, and those who could not and have had heartbreaking moments trying to. I celebrate all of you! 💕 🤱🏼💗Um dos momentos mais especiais que compartilhei com meus filhos foi durante a amamentação. O olhar especial que você recebe e o sentimento de conexão são diferentes de tudo que já experimentei.
Adorei a iniciativa do #mêsdaconscientizaçãosobreaamamentação, pois esclarece a importância da amamentação. Sim, no começo pode ser difícil, pode doer (as rachaduras, o sangramento, o ingurgitamento), mas não importa o quão desafiador, não mudaria essa experiência por nada neste mundo. Me sinto abençoada por poder nutri-los dessa maneira. Parabéns a todas as mães pelo esforço que colocam , não só aquelas que amamentaram, mas também aquelas que não puderam e tiveram momentos dolorosos tentando. Eu celebro todas vocês!
Full disclosure, I never looked like that photo when I breastfed. Even Gisele’s bangles are attractively spaced and you just know Vivian is perfectly latched and pulling with flawless little, pursed cherub lips. Fortunately for all of you, there are no photos of what I looked like breastfeeding. There was a lot more coffee-stained clothing and matted hair. If I looked as beautiful and serene as Gisele did, I would have never stopped. As for her message, it’s nice. She’s acknowledging that it wasn’t perfect, but it was still a time she cherished. She’s also acknowledging that some women can’t, which is good. Because it is heartbreaking. I don’t know firsthand, but I’ve had three close friends go through it and it devastated them. There will be a lot of talk about breastfeeding for the next few weeks (although, I feel like it’s all I ever hear) but please remember, as Gisele said, sometimes it doesn’t happen. Fed is best. You are an awesome mom. Your baby loves you just as much as anyone else’s. You’ve done nothing wrong.
Speaking of Gisele and Instagram, I give her mad props for calling herself out on her husband’s IG. Seven years ago, Gisele ticked Patriot fans off when she was caught on tape responding to someone (who was being a jerk), “My husband cannot f–king throw the ball and catch the ball at the same time.” Last week, Tom Brady made this video of him throwing and catching a football, to which Gisele commented, “What!?! He can actually throw and catch at the same time.”
Also, if you want a little house pr0n this morning, Gisele and Tom are selling their Brookline estate.
Photo credit: Instagram and WENN Photos
Talk about another one to smack the smug off. Ugh… Can NOT stand this woman, or her husband.
Same!
Ditto! 10x
Not me. I hated and resented every moment of it and yet I felt forced to do it for each of my children.
I wish we were allowed and encouraged to parent how we can.
I feel the smug dripping from her or maybe it is just my own personal negative judgement.
I waited for the whoosh of breastfeeding bonding and it never came. I blamed me for that.
She’s divided moms into two camps: those who are able to breastfeed and do and love it, and those who desperately wanted to but couldn’t and were heartbroken. What about those who just never wanted to? What about those who were able to do it, did it for awhile, didn’t like it, and stopped? What about those who were able to do it, did it for a full year or more, and felt resentful about having to do it and never enjoyed it? I get that it’s breastfeeding awareness month, so her post will be about the positives of breastfeeding and her experience with it, but she expanded beyond her own experience when she spoke about those who want to breastfeed but can’t. So maybe she could’ve gone even further and spoke about the moms who don’t want to do it or who do it but don’t like it?
I also know that not every celebrity Instagram post can be all things to all people, and we might be heading down a slippery slope when we start to expect everyone’s posts about any topic to touch on every nuance and include all sides…..but there was something about how she assumed all moms are either breastfeeding joyfully or crushed because they can’t that seemed really off to me.
call me triggered but this woman needs to sit down and shut up.
I couldn’t stand her before but now, I wanna slap the s*** out of her.
She talks about how wonderful all this is, the experiences of true motherhood… yes, love. for you. and all your money and doctors and hired help.
For some of us (me) breastfeeding was a nightmare and because we’re conditioned to thinking there is no better way, I cried and repeatedly said sorry to my kid when I had to give her formula – read: sorry for feeding. I mean, come on. and apparently my healthy formula-fed kid was a fluke because I can’t for the life of me have another.
sorry to unload. she really grinds my gears.
Took the words right out of my mouth. This woman is insufferable.
I just can’t with her smugness.
When a breastfeeding relationship goes well it is truly amazing, it is truly so special. I had that with my first baby. I did absolutely NOTHING, he just latched within an hour of birth and it all was so incredibly easy and perfect for 11 whole months. Beautiful bonding time, wonderful.
With my second it was a struggle from the beginning. I had an oversupply, yet she was never satisfied. She bit me and hurt me and screamed through the majority of feedings. I leaked constantly, had tons of pain. We had all kinds of issues and it was truly a miserable experience. If anything it stood in the way of bonding, I bonded more deeply with her once I weaned her at 7 months and started bottle feeding her.
Fed is best! Accepting that you don’t have much control at all over whether breastfeeding will go well for each baby is best! I’m very happy for Giselle and all moms who get the chance to have a peaceful breastfeeding relationship, but I also know what it’s like to really struggle and kind of end up hating and resenting the process of breastfeeding. Tough times!
Those house photos are so beautiful. But I always wonder when I see celebrity house photos, where do the kids live??
Often the celebs have already moved out of the houses and what you see is entirely staged.
They haven’t moved yet. They’re looking but haven’t moved.
I recently sold a house and there were absolutely no traces of my kid in any of the photos. Behind the scenes, I was dragging kid crap from room to room as we went to make sure none of it was visible in the photos haha.
This, we sold our house last summer and the only pictures that showed their presence were the ones of their rooms, and those had been cleaned and organized to within an inch of their lives before photos. While we were actively showing, everything stayed picked up and put away and ready to go at a moment’s notice. I’ve relaxed some since we’re in our new house, but the downstairs is almost always within 15-20 minutes of being company ready, and the upstairs (where the gameroom and kid bedrooms are) is kept pretty neat, too. Mine are closer in age to Giselle’s though at 6 and 11, so it’s easier to enforce those rules than when they were toddlers and our whole house was covered in kid stuff 24/7.
I both breastfed and bottle-fed. Both experiences were magical and I connected with my child equally.
Ha! The first bottle feed after three weeks of horrific breast feeding experiences and failures (mostly failures) was magical, for me and the Fantling.
I have three kids. My eldest I only breast fed for three months. I had no end of problems and was hospitalised and I was quick to give up. I honestly still feel I bonded more closely with my younger two who were both breast fed for almost two years. My eldest also has ASD though, so perhaps thats also part of the reason that the dynamic is different with him. He’s not cuddly and doesn’t show affection in the same way as his brothers.
She and that husband of hers are insufferable. I am just disgusted by her arrogance.
Did you see the castle this woman lives in??? Everything would be magical there. Breastfeeding, bottle feeding, feeding the cat.
And, I would like to ditto on the coffee covered, crazy-haired breast feeding. I sadly missed the memo about 4 gorgeous, golden bangles and a lovely, tiny, nearly not there ring. I was more a “this again” zombie at 3am. You know, one person’s magic is another person’s “fark this kid eats a lot, I am pretty sure I have post partum.” XO I was trying to remove my contact lenses from my ears and I was putting the soother in my husband’s mouth instead of the babies. Do not idealize this ladies … do NOT fall for this shit.
Everyone loves there babies, breastfed or not. Photograph the not magical moments. OOOOh, now there is a parenting book. “The Not Magical Moments”.
Well clearly if you would have dressed up and worn gold bangles it would have been a much better scenario for you and your baby 🙄
I didn’t even try breast feeding, I had no desire to do so,but I also knew it wasn’t going to be possible as I had to resume meds for an autoimmune condition that would have crossed through my body and into breast milk.Bottle feeding was wonderful and also a lovely bonding experience.To each their own,and I assure you I too was in ugly clothes with matted hair and dark circles under my eyes!
“Fark this kid eats a lot…I was trying to remove my contact lenses from my ears” I legitimately had to walk away from my desk at work because I was laughing too hard at this.
My experience was the unmagical kind that ended with me pumping for 9 months and supplementing with formula while people constantly gave unwanted advice. And yet MAGICALLY, my baby and I bonded. Will wonders never cease?
Pineapple…you are a treasure. Funny, relatable and compassionate post. Thank you.
That house is beautiful, yes, but obscene. Doesn’t she claim to be an environmentalist? That’s a 9,000+ sq ft. house, built barely 4 years ago, and they are already trying to leave it. Carbon footprint insanity.
Jesus, even if I had that much money I just couldn’t spend 40 mil on a house that huge. It’s not necessary. I’m glad her breastfeeding experience was wonderful though, I felt the same way about it. It was hard the first few weeks and I cried through bleeding and cracked nipples, but we got the hang of it eventually. I actually miss that feeling of nursing, sometimes I’ll hear a baby cry and get that tingly feeling like milk is letting down and I’ll get a tiny bit of fluid, even 12 years later, it’s crazy! My dr made me get a mammogram because he said that shouldn’t happen 😂
I had a formula fed, a breastfed, and a both fed baby and I want to be abundantly clear that you get the same feeling of bonding and closeness regardless of how you’re feeding them.
It’s still you and your baby at four am, sitting there staring at each other.
And I realize she’s only speaking for herself and I’m not smack talking Gisele (for once).
But I do want to challenge the narrative that breastfeeding has some kind of super glue like bonding powers and that if you formula feed you might be missing out on it. People out here sounding like the Barefoot Contessa “if you can’t find good organic bonding, then store bought bonding is fine”.
To be honest, I find baby sleep to be the thing that bonding hinges on. You’re gonna bond eventually regardless but it’s harder to bond with a baby who doesn’t sleep and/or cries often.
Totally agree with it all and especially the last part. Out of my four (one set of twins) my son who was so colicky and just the worst is the one I’m the least bonded with and I hate it and have tried so hard to fix it but there just seems to be this invisible barrier I can’t get past.
How old is he? I’m sure you have time.
My both ways baby is the one I bonded with the least initially. She wouldn’t sleep if anyone was in the room so it means stumbling around to feed her and just felt disruptive. And she’s my most independent, fearless, and active one. Always wanted to be doing something or moving somewhere. Not a cuddler at all but she’s 16 now and I have just as close of a bond with her as the others. It’s just a unique one.
He’s 6. Like right now with all the back to school pics being posted and parents saying how sad they are and how they cried I’m like, um I’m counting down until the bus comes tomorrow. With my twins though I know I will be sad when they start school next year. He’s also the most active, deficient, argumentative, bull headed one and never a cuddler unlike my youngest son who is the most cuddly. My in-laws still say every time they see him “he never stops and runs everywhere.” Duh, he’s been like this since day one. Glad to hear that you’ve finally made a breakthrough with your daughter. Did you do anything special like therapy?
Nothing special. I just let her be great lol. Or at least tried to praise her for her seemingly teflon personality.
She had a really hard time in school for a few years to be honest. I had to learn how to parent her specifically and to stop trying to use how I naturally parent on her and expecting the same results as I get from my boys who naturally respond better to my instincts than she ever did.
She requires lots of positive affirmations and for me to be open to the things she’s excited about first, which is a bit harder than it seems, I think. I think we naturally want to reach for the things we have in common with our kids and share that.
But don’t completely abandon the ways you naturally show love for him either. I didn’t think she cared that I like to sew for her. She wore everything without complaint and all that but I didn’t think she cared that much. But I found out last year that she’s been saving all of them in a box in her closet because they mean that much to her. She doesn’t plan to have children either so she’s got them solely because they are special to her.
So long story short, don’t let yourself worry too much about these younger, stressful years. Parenting is a long game.
Does the furniture comes with the house?
@Lena, yeah, once the house is staged like that, the future is normally kicked in. I think the interior decorator gets a percentage of the sale.
Interesting ! I don’t think I would really feel at home, moving in a place already decorated like that.
Thank you for your reply!
Your perspective really changes when you give birth to a baby with special needs. Just ensuring they are getting nutrients and gaining wait and thriving becomes your entire focus. With my little girl, I breast fed, but her low muscle tone meant she couldn’t latch for long and we had to feed her with tubes and bottles. It’s upsetting when people discourage any form of feeding your baby. Fed is best. I feel we should advocate for breastfeeding so we can decrease the stigma around breastfeeding in public, but we can’t cross the line and starting shaming mothers for feeding their child via other methods. Which is what I see a lot of this time of year with the awareness month. Fed is best. Fed is best. Fed is best!
Thank you for sharing this. This is a perspective I hadn’t heard (which is a problem). You’re right in that we can have both, advocacy for breastfeeding to decrease any stigma but also stressing that breastfeeding is not something that everyone can or wants to do. Maybe a breastfeeding is normal, bottle feeding is normal, fed is best campaign! You’ve highlighted a key issue…the breastfeeding brigade is really militant and judgmental. I wish breastfeeding advocates would realize this and be more inclusive with their messaging and realize that at the end of the day, fed is best.
If she had a reality show, it would be called My Perfect Life. I wonder if it’s really that perfect or if she’s maybe trying a bit too hard to come off that way? Her Instagram account is about nauseating with all the happy family wellness posts. Maybe it’s personal preference but it’s just a little bit too sickly sweet.
If you had a child and breastfed, but didn’t post it all over social media like a smug a-hole, did it really happen?
No.
@wait what & @pineapple: I breastfed 3 kids (for about 16mos each) and I don’t think I own a single picture of my BFing, let alone a social media post.
I find myself in this strange, empty middle ground of the Fed is Best & pro-breastfeeding debates. Like, while I preferred BFing, I can totally admit that it’s not easy & perfect & magical. I HATED pumping, and was harassed at work for doing it. And I had a really terrible time of BFing in the first few weeks with engorgement & cracked/bleeding nipples (I would sometimes literally sob when my daughter would cry because I knew it was time to nurse & it would HURT SO BAD). I had 2 bouts of mastitis, and I can’t even describe how awful that was. I also breastfed in public without a cover but still made an attempt to keep my breast covered–so I stand in the middle of, “Feed your baby in the bathroom!” and, “I’m going to whip my entire shirt off at Disneyland cuz I can!” (There is totally a middle ground there, Moms). And I would do it all again–But I get that some women can’t or don’t want to. That’s fine. There is no need for either side to vilify the other, and I find all the mommy shaming to be so tiresome.
Scarlet, God bless your heart. Your post simply drives home that this s*it is hard no matter how you do it. The ridiculous super-mom posts benefit no one except the narcissists who post them.
On one of my most special moments was when they could walk to the fridge and grab their own drink. 😆
Mab’s I always love your comments, haha!! 🙂
Lol, thank you! I have pictures of this life-affirming achievement!
Or that day you dropped them off at FREE public school kindergarten. Now that was magical.
Haha I can’t wait for that day Anne!!!
Wait until they can call you after school to ask what’s for dinner and then you come home to it cooking on the stove while the other one cleans up after him.
Blissssssss!
Yup! The progression of self-sufficient milestones is soooooooooooo awesome. Aside from certain self discoveries we moms don’t wanna walk in on, lol, or can’t go to sleep cuz the teens in the living room are bouncing off the walls, it’s all pretty magical. And then your oldest tells you his fiance wants a baby within a year, and you realize you’re going to be bottlefeeding and changing diapers again, and soon after that you’ll be hearing, “GMA, GMA GMA GMA, I’m firsty, firsty GMA, me firstyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!” 😒
Maybe it’s just me but I find nothing wrong with her message. It’s not random, it’s within the context of breastfeeding awareness month, and she’s sharing her personal experience about breastfeeding, which, for HER, was magical. She’s insufferable in lots of ways, but in this instance, I’m not seeing it.
(Signed, one who bf her kid for 2.5 years and got lots of judgment for how LOOONNNNGGGG I did it.)
I got a lot of judgment for breastfeeding so long so I am very much of the just don’t judge others and do you mindset. Me celebrating my wonderful breastfeeding journey shouldn’t make mothers who didn’t have that or didn’t want that feel slighted. Similarly If a mommy wants to post about how she hated Breastfeeding and found it to me wildly invasive I’m not going to think that her personal choice is a silent judgment on my choice. Yes don’t judge but also can we stop finding judgment where non exists? Fed is best absolutely but how one chooses to feed is incredibly personal. I breastfed my daughter for 2.5 years and the number of mommies who advised that I was putting her off real food or babying her was rather unhelpful. Being a mommy only makes you an expert on your own child! They are so unique- there really is no generally accepted way to do things besides just loving them, feeding them, changing them and clothing them.
Just posted the same above. I got constant, “How long are you going to DO that?”
Yep. The judgment was endless.
She is so very much harmless with her lack of influence.
Her mother should be interviewed, Ms Vania gived birth to six girls including Gisele, I’m sure the experience of each one is different from each other. Taking into account the fact they were living in a village very far away from the best medical care in the 80’s. Two of Gisele’s sisters are successful lawyers and one is a powerful Federal Judge.