Chrissy Teigen covers the latest issue of Marie Claire. She talks about a lot of different things in this interview – she’s promoting all of her projects, including her lifestyle brand (Cravings), her cooking shows, her cookbooks and on and on. This interview was done shortly after she announced her pregnancy this summer, which is beyond tragic given her recent tragedy. She’s also talking about her politics, racism and how happy she is to vote for the Biden-Harris ticket. You can read the full piece here. Some highlights:
Anxiety as she becomes more successful: “I’m having a hard time being any kind of mogul and running companies because it’s hard for me to work on, or even talk about, two things at once. With my anxiety, the worst thing is not giving enough to enough people. It’s like going grocery shopping when you’re full; if I feel like I have too many good things going on, I can’t say yes to another good thing.”
She doesn’t live online anymore: “I’m barely online anymore, and that was at the request of my therapist. I didn’t start therapy until quarantine. I used to avoid it and make fun of the idea of it, and then I found the right person and it changed my world. People think I’m tough, but I’m such an empath, and I take on other people’s pain and sadness as my own. And when I let people down, I’m hyperaware of it. Sometimes I feel like people aren’t going to be as hard on me as I am on myself. So it’s good for me to take a break…. Part of me right now knows this is not the right time to go silent. It does feel very selfish and weird to say that my mental health is important when there are people being murdered by police and murdered in their own homes. Who gives a f–k about someone making fun of me when people’s livelihoods are being threatened just for telling their stories? I have Black children, so is it really the right time to not want to step on anyone’s toes?”
Raising black children: “There are books that I read when I became a mom that would explain to them hard and traumatic situations. But it’s really hard to teach them about their privilege; there are no books for that. But regardless of money or status, they’re always going to have their skin color… When it comes to them being treated differently because of the color of their skin, I’m going to look to John for a lot of help with that because while they are Asian and white too, their skin color is Black. We just try to talk to them like little adults, saying it in words they’ll understand, making it known that it’s very serious, and letting them ask as many questions as they need.”
On Trump: “People are very confident in their ways of being open about their racism because they have the backing views of the president. It’s become such a hurtful, weird presidency for so many Americans, and I’m going to fight to get this person out of office because I can’t live another four years with this kind of hatred boiling through America.”
On the Biden-Harris ticket: “There were multiple people that I liked, and I knew speaking out would be an endorsement of them. Then they started dropping out one by one. I love Kamala Harris, and my biggest regret is not speaking out about her. I was thrown off and got scared. I wanted to wait and wait until I 100 percent backed somebody, and then sooner or later that just became the one candidate…We are proud to stand behind Biden. We’re not only voting for Biden because it’s not Trump. We’re voting for him because we think he’s going to do an incredible job of bringing a bit of healing to the country. We are a divided, hurt nation that needs to be brought back together. [Biden is] someone who looks into issues with clear eyes, empathy, and understanding from being involved in politics. I also look at a presidential candidate as someone I want my kids to be able to look up to. I don’t see that in Donald Trump or any of his family.”
I was trying to remember what Chrissy had said or done regarding Bernie Sanders, because I was just reading this piece cold, and I thought it sounded like she was a reformed Bernie supporter. But no, she’s talked sh-t about Sanders and his toxic fanbase in many tweets and statements starting in 2019. It basically sounds like she kept relatively quiet during the Democratic primaries and then threw her support to the Biden-Harris ticket once it was a sure thing. Which is smart, and I wish more celebrities would do it that way. Also, to Chrissy’s therapist: THANK U.
Photos courtesy of Marie Claire.
I always LOL when I hear people say “I’m such an empath,” because they are usually the most self-absorbed people I know. I feel things deeply, too, and never in my life have I said that. I like Chrissy a lot, I just think that line is a bit funny.
Along the empath lines, the women who sling around the term “momma bear” are always self absorbed drama queens.
Omg I thought I was the only person wary of “mama bears”
Oh my god my coworker has an actual shirt that says “mama bear” on it and fighting the urge to punch her smug, selfish, entitled face is a daily struggle.
LGBTQ youth who have been disowned by their families can get a hug, listening ear, and perhaps even safe haven by a “Mama Bear”. I learned this at a PFlag meeting, and they have T-shirts made up especially for this purpose. Supportive motherly types wear them so kids feel safe approaching them, especially in situations like a Conservative Christian community, etc. Although I support all LGBTQ youth, I’m not comfy hugging total strangers, so I did not become a “Mama Bear”. But I’m so curious: what other folks are attracted to “Mama Bear” shirts? Does it have another image?
@Nikki* I think lots of people use “Mama Bear” as a general term for a Mom or Mom-type… I’ve heard it used all the time, and never in the LGBTQ context you just described (though thanks for that info! Good to know)
I have met a person who told me “I have started to practice to be more empath, I am listening to other”. The most self absorbed person I have ever met.
Eww
Yes to this, and also the whole “my new therapist got me to stop living my life online” is a COMPLETE joke.
Cosign. In my experience people who state they are empaths tend to have poor boundaries and attach themselves to the pain of others as a way of avoiding their own. Which often leads to a lack of empathy, because if you can’t feel your own feelings it makes it hard to have a sense of anyone else’s.
Well said lula
“…I’m such an empath, and I take on other people’s pain and sadness as my own. And when I let people down, I’m hyperaware of it. Sometimes I feel like people aren’t going to be as hard on me as I am on myself.” Okaaaay. But she did not apologize for slut-shaming a teen victim of misogynistic abuse and telling her to kill herself on twitter?
Chrissy Teigan and her family still deserve compassion for the loss of their child, no question. And I know this interview came before this tragedy. But it’s really something for her to say all this about herself this year.
And especially when she made that tone-deaf joke about Megan Thee Stallion right after she got shot.
Yup she’s said a lot of problematic things.
Sorry, but if I hear ONE MORE PERSON talk about “oh my stress level is higher than most people because I’m an EMPATH…”
Like, no, if you were actually empathetic you would see that most everyone has pain from witnessing the stresses and anxieties of others.
But you sure did find a new reason to talk about yourself for a whole Facebook post, didn’t you 🙄
Well, bring an empath is different than being empathetic. You can be both, but being an empath is about really feeling others’ feelings as your own, sometimes to the extent that you can’t tell if you’re anxious or the person across from you is. So I think she’s saying something different than you think.
This is true. “Empath” seems to be more tied in with the New Agey fakeness of “it’s all love and light” while being completely oblivious to what an asshole you are. It’s suddenly hip to be an empath because it means you are special with special powers. So it has nothing to do with empathy.
Is that not the normal way of things? To feel anxious because the people around you are anxious? Especially if they’re people close to you, because you pick up on their emotional cues that much quicker.
I agree with your explanation. I am very sensitive to others feelings and emotions, even more so if the person is close to me. It doesn’t make me “special” or “full of myself” or whatever other condescending adjectives others have used. It’s just part of who I am and has it good and bad parts. When you combine this with anxiety, it’s exactly as she described. You can feel others disappointment in you for example and then the anxiety kicks in and just escalates all the feelings. Being tuned in to others is extremely challenging and can be debilitating at times, but is also an incredible gift.
Yeah you Just described making other people’s problems all about yourself and how you feel.
So I’d say my assessment that only narcissists seem to refer to themselves as “empath” holds. Seems to me that “empath” is the self-absorbed-persons stab at empathy.
To me that still just sounds like giving half a shit about the person across from you, it’s not special nor should it be applauded – it should just be normal.
Sometimes I wonder if people mistake co-dependency as “being an empath”. I struggle with codependency and I find that if I’m not taking care of my boundaries and communicating clearly, I am very likely to take on the stress/anxiety/anger of those around me. Not because I’m an empath and I’m so special, but because I’m codependent and I have to remind myself daily that I am not responsible for the negative feelings of everyone around me.
That’s actually a really interesting take. I’ve seen recently that childhood trauma can kind of mask as being an empath if you had to grow up in a situation where you were very vigilant of people’s moods and things changed on a dime, or you felt unsafe emotionally or physically.
My best friend has always had empath traits (although we never called it that until we started hearing that term the last few years) and she is the least dramatic and self-centered person I know – contrary to @Eenie Googles’ take. She has always just absorbed everyone’s stress/tension/anger/happiness in a way where she feels the same emotion in her body and can’t shut it off. I’ve seen her in real time going from having a nice, happy conversation with me and then someone walks in the room who is tense or angry (not even a close friend who she cares about) and she’ll immediately just absorb that energy and her whole demeanor changes.
Whether it’s being an empath or having childhood trauma/co-dependency, the people who have this are not all trying to insert themselves into the center of things to be “special” or because they are narcissists or whatever, it’s just their way of being and now there is a pop-culture word for it.
Yes @sam this is an excellent description as im in that situation and have been taken advantage of by people who dump their stress anxiety etc. into me. Its exhausting
@ Sam – I think this is a really astute take. Speaking from personal experience, attachment wounds as a kid can absolutely lead to being hyperaware of other people’s moods and having trouble differentiating other people’s feelings/responsibilities from your own (aka, codependency).
For a lot of folks, it’s probably really attractive to embrace that as a special ability rather than a byproduct of neglect/abuse/trauma – and certainly there are pros! If using the label “empath” helps people navigate the cons, all the better. It seems like a lot of the resources for empaths are focused on boundary work anyway, so perhaps it’s a potato/new-agey-potahto situation!
I LOL’ed at Kaiser’s thank you to Chrissy’s therapist. Grade A shade.
I like Chrissy, I understand what she’s trying to say.
I hope that she is doing well as can be expected after such a loss. Her and John are couple goals.
They do seem like a sweet couple, but “couple goals” is such an overused phrase whether the couple is famous or not. I feel like it gets used even when one partner does the absolute bare minimum expected in a marriage/partnership. Besides, she and John (or any couple) could treat each other absolutely horribly away from the cameras and we would never know. Better not to idolize complete strangers.
We know nothing about these people OR their partnership. Even with people we do see and interact with, we cannot know what a marriage or partnership is truly like.
She actually always comes off as extremely self-centered to me — not at all like she feels the pain of others.
And every single time she talks about “I have Black children” I remember how she mocked Quvenzhané Wallis and has still never apologized — so it’s okay to be mean to a little Black girl as long as it’s not the little Black girl you personally gave birth to?
I didn’t like how she try to call those Selling Sunset people out. She seems to want to interfere with other peoples’ hustles while conveniently forgetting that we wouldn’t even know her if she wasn’t married to John Legend.
I am so over her, thank you therapist thank you. I think maybe her people kept cheering her on so she kept on posting.