Oh Pamela Anderson, why do you insist on making us look at your thighs? Granted, they’re not bad thighs. Everything considered, they’re quite nice. But I really don’t feel I need to know all about them. I would be such a happier person if, every night before I went to bed, I could genuinely wonder, “Hey, what do Pamela Anderson’s thighs look like?” I feel like my entire life would be better if it were a question, instead of mentally reviewing the weekly photo proofs. And I can’t simply not think about them; it’s very much a pink elephant situation.

For this week installment of Pamela Anderson’s body overshare, she’s strapped on her old Baywatch red bathing suit and paraded around the runway for the A*MUSE by Richie Rich show during Miami fashion week. There’s also what appears to be crime scene tape tied around her left thigh and right calf, along with a massively chunky necklace that appears to be made out whatever tin cans and baseball mitts the local goats didn’t get to first. Coupled with the flesh-toned heels, I probably don’t need to tell you that there was too much sexiness up in there.

Pam Anderson slipped back into her Baywatch swimsuit Wednesday night.

The actress and model, now 42, wore the famous red one-piece down the catwalk at the A*MUSE by Richie Rich show during the Funkshion Fashion Week in Miami Beach.

Considering that the suit still fits, would she ever play C. J. Parker on the big screen?

“Never! I’m not going do it,” she told Usmagazine.com. “I liked the TV show. I don’t like it when they ruin it by making a movie out of it.”

Though Anderson looks better than ever, her former Baywatch costar Nicole Eggert — who will complete in the next season of VH1’s Celebrity Fit Club — has packed on the pounds. Anderson told Us, “I haven’t seen her in a long time.”

So how does Anderson – mother to sons, Brandon, 12 and Dylan, 11 – stay in such great shape?

“It’s all natural,” PETA Vice President (and pal) Dan Mathews told Us. “I mean, even if she’s had to fly all night to meet with some government official with little sleep, she still has this upbeat attitude, and it’s very much about determination with her. She’s a great mother. Her kids are [older], ready to give her headaches, but she’s great with them.”

[From Us Weekly]

I can’t think of any worse role model to pick to encourage vegetarianism than Pamela Anderson. “Hey everyone, stop eating meat and you too can look beat to hell and ravaged well beyond your years!” If that’s the case, pass the bacon. Apparently not eating meat can also lead to bad vision and poor judgment, since PETA’s VP thinks Pamela is a good choice. The worst part is that at one point Pam pulled out a mask that appeared to be a cross of Ronald McDonald and a psycho killer clown. I don’t even know why. Probably something to do with the crime scene tape.

So what else is Pammy up to these days? Well it’s just been announced that she’ll be starring in a Christmastime pantomime production of Aladdin in London, playing the Genie of the Lamp. Since the show is meant for kids, hopefully Pamela will keep her pants on – but I’m assuming the producers will put some sort of warning in the programs that, because it’s Pamela Anderson, she may very well not. I wonder if they’ll bring back those giant canes they used to use to pull bad performers off the stage? Might be a good idea to keep a few on hand, just as a precaution. And it’s funnier than simply turning the lights off.

Here’s Pamela and her killer clown walking the runway at the Richie Rich AMUSE fashion show at the Setai hotel in Miami yesterday. Images thanks to Johnny Louis /WENN.com .