In the minutes after Will Smith slapped Chris Rock on stage at the Oscars, Denzel Washington and Tyler Perry pulled Will aside and spoke to him quietly. It was believed that they were calming him down and advising him on what to do and say next. Days later, Denzel spoke about how the three men shared prayers and that it was not his place (Denzel’s place) to judge Will. Incidentally, after the meeting of the church elders, Will also spoke to Bradley Cooper, who appeared to be trying to keep Will calm, perhaps even doing some breathing techniques with him. Bradley still hasn’t said anything about that moment, and neither has Jessica Chastain (who also checked on both Will and Jada). Tyler Perry kept quiet about it until now too. Tyler was in NYC for the Tribeca Film Festival, and he did a Q&A session with Gayle King. Gayle asked him about Will. Tyler had a lot to say.
During a wide-ranging conversation with Gayle King as part of the Tribeca Film Festival’s Directors Series in New York City Monday, Perry, 52, addressed the shocking moment and the immediate aftermath. Perry (who was at the Oscars to honor Sidney Poitier during the In Memoriam segment) was photographed speaking to Will along with Denzel Washington directly after the smack, but as he clarified to King, he wasn’t “comforting” him, he was “deescalating” the situation.
“There’s a difference between comforting and deescalating, that’s No. 1. And I left early to get to Chris to make sure he was okay. Being friends with both of them has been very difficult,” said Perry. “Trust me, as painful as it was for all of us in the room, it was as painful for Chris, who was a pure champion for the way he handled it. But I want you to understand that something happened that was extremely painful for [Will] as well. That is no excuse. He was completely wrong for what he did. But something triggered him — that is so out of everything he is.”
Perry also added that the outburst was “wrong in no uncertain terms, and I made sure I said that to Will.”
“And I’ll tell you, when we walked over to him, he was devastated. He couldn’t believe what happened. He couldn’t believe he did it,” the filmmaker/actor recalled of Will’s demeanor. “I’m looking at this man in his eyes going, ‘What are you doing? This is your night.’ And to get all the way to this moment, winning an Oscar, that was one of the crowning moments of his career that he wanted so desperately, and to have something like that happen….”
“I think he is very much in reflection of trying to figure out what happened,” continued Perry. “Because what I’ll tell you is I just read his book, and there’s this moment about not being able to protect his mother [as a child]. I know that feeling — I’m getting chills just thinking about it. I know that feeling of being a man and thinking about the little boy. And if that trauma is not dealt with right away, as you get older it will show up in the most inappropriate, most horrible time. I know Will. I know him well.”
Yep, Tyler is right. Will was wrong, but there’s more nuance and backstory to it, clearly. And it was abundantly clear that there were men in the room – Denzel, Tyler, Bradley – who took it upon themselves to act as crisis managers. What strikes me is the humanity Bradley, Tyler and Denzel showed that night. It was the Oscars, everyone was in tuxedos and gowns and it was supposed to be Hollywood’s annual self-congratulatory circle jerk. And after the slap, there was this moment of grace where these men were simply trying to de-escalate and help Will instead of shunning him or punishing him.
Photos courtesy of Getty, Avalon Red.
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- Tyler Perry, and Oscar® nominees Will Smith and Denzel Washington during the 94th Oscars® at the Dolby Theatre at Ovation Hollywood in Los Angeles, CA, on Sunday, March 27, 2022.,Image: 673515395, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: Avalon Licensing Ltd. do not claim any Copyright of the attached image WORLD RIGHTS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
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- Oscar® nominee Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith during the 94th Oscars® at the Dolby Theatre at Ovation Hollywood in Los Angeles, CA, on Sunday, March 27, 2022.,Image: 673515422, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: Avalon Licensing Ltd. do not claim any Copyright of the attached image WORLD RIGHTS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
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- Tyler Perry during the live ABC telecast of the 94th Oscars® at the Dolby Theatre at Ovation Hollywood in Los Angeles, CA, on Sunday, March 27, 2022.,Image: 673515573, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: Avalon Licensing Ltd. do not claim any Copyright of the attached image WORLD RIGHTS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
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- Tyler Perry arrives on the red carpet of the 94th Oscars® at the Dolby Theatre at Ovation Hollywood in Los Angeles, CA, on Sunday, March 27, 2022.,Image: 673568344, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: Avalon Licensing Ltd. do not claim any Copyright of the attached image WORLD RIGHTS- Fee Payable Upon reproduction – For queries contact Avalon sales@Avalon.red London +44 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles +1 310 822 0419 Berlin +49 30 76 212 251 Madrid +34 91 533, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red / Avalon
It’s all still very sad to me. All of it.
I don’t think anyone ever said that what Will did was right. I know that many of us including myself felt that there was more to what happened that night. That the history between Will, Jada and Chris is complicated and nuanced. That Chris Rock’s history towards black women is horrible. I feel more for Will because I understand his background of abuse and triggers. I believe Will thought he was defending his wife. That’s that. I hope that Will is doing well and getting the help he needs. I hope that Chris Rock grows the f*ck up and owns up to how he has maligned black women.
Agree 1000%. There was a lot more to this story than just a slap. I think the Amy Schumers and the Judd Apatows of Hollywood needed to show some of the same kind of humanity that Bradley, Tyler and Denzel exhibited. Instead, they took it as a moment to show their asses.
100% agree with the comments from traci and girl_ninja.
That spontaneous and immediate humanity helped the situation so much in that moment. Everyone has a moment where their suffering and history can break out in a polarizing way and where they don’t look at their best. If compassionate allies can stand up around that person in that moment, how much better those moments would be for all of us. Instead, if Will had been left to twist in the wind, with the producers getting conflicting instructions from different sources it would have been even more of a painful scene.
Yes, he was de-escalating. Obviously.
I think Tyler touched on something. I listened to Celebrity memoir book club’s podcast about his memoir and yeah, in retrospect of him talking about that same feeling Tyler of not being able to protect his mom, kinda took over his body makes sense. So yes, not an excuse but an explanation.
I think what he said about dealing with trauma is important. It reminds me of shadow psyche work, if we don’t work on healing our trauma and doing our shadow work, our shadow psyche will pop out at the most inopportune time and place. We have to own our shadows, accept them. None of us are any less human than Will, there but for grace. I hope for healing for everyone involved in this situation.
Wonderfully said. And I hate hate hate that so woman did the scary Black man thing and people ate it up. Don’t get me started on Judd and his terrible ass.
This morning I was doing some research for a speech and watching some older videos of celebrities paying tribute to their colleagues at various AFI Lifetime Achievement Awards over the years and some of them were borderline insulting in their praise. These weren’t those roast events Comedy Central had. There was one in particular where Robin Williams was making jokes on everyone in the audience. Cringeworthy, but it reminded me of this moment. From the comedian’s perspective was one part, but also from Will’s perspective. He was the first black action movie star and his Lifetime Achievement Award was building to its moment. Will it happen now? Time will tell.
Anybody who laughed [pretty much everyone in there did] at a joke made at the expense of a woman suffering from hair loss was an accessory to the offense. If no one would’ve laughed at the insensitive joke Chris Rock made he would have inferred that it is not socially acceptable to make that kind of joke especially in the presence of the insulted person. So I am blaming everyone in the audience who laughed at a cruel joke like that. And no, violence is not acceptable either. Smith could’ve hurt Rock’s cheek bone or septum or the left eardrum. So we as the audience are responsible indirectly for the assault. And let’s be honest, Smith could’ve been arrested and charged with a crime but he didn’t because he was a celebrity.
For me, this was just another display of violence. I have heard the reasons he was triggered, but he does not need to perpetuate that circle of violence or it will never end. I grew up with violence and molestation, and people need help to process that trauma.
Those who abused me suffered through the same, and although I feel great sorrow for what they endured, it gave them no right to carry on that behavior.
Many may not agree with me, and that is ok. I’m simply asking that we expect those who act out in violence get the help they need. You may not like what someone says, and even if they say it once or twenty times, it still doesn’t give anyone the right to lay their hands on you. Women have suffered at the hands of this excuse for far too long.
I would also like to add that I am so very proud of these men for de-escalating this situation. It showed true love and respect for their fellow friends. With friends like those, Will has the support he needs to heal and grow. I’m hoping we see something even more extraordinary from Will in the coming years.
Beautifully said, and very true. I’m sorry that you had to go through this.
@brainfog
Thank you so much, it is kind of you to say and I really do appreciate it.
Thank you stagaroni for saying what I felt about this from that night. I’m sorry for what you endured.
But the minute the slap happened I was immediately triggered to a man in my past hitting me in the face and 20 minutes later saying “I love you so much I get crazy sometimes”. That is why I felt the slap was triggering. I felt it myself. It took me right back to that place.
Do I agree with Rock’s insensitive, misogynistic jokes at a black woman’s expense? Of course not. It was dead wrong. Rock should’ve been called out for it -not physically slapped for it.
I too applaud the men who tried to help Will in that moment. It showed true maturity and humanity. They saw he was hurting and tried to intercede. I can only imagine Will’s trauma from his childhood. I imagine he snapped and also felt triggered to defend his wife. I understand it. I just cannot condone laying hands on someone. Period.
Well Nicole Kidman was definitely comforting Will and Jada. And Bradley Cooper is a personal friend from Philly
who was comforting a friend. They weren’t de-escalating anything because he wasn’t raging.
People were rallying around the Smiths because they had been attacked once again by a person with a history of attacking them. Chris didn’t press charges because he read the room. He would have received the outrage he rightly deserved if his impersonation of Stephen from D’Jango had led to Will Smith not being present to accept that Oscar – an award he earned with his hard work.
Even if Will had been arrested, they wouldn’t have held him because that slap was not serious. Jail was out of the question either way. But Chris would forever be the Black man who intentionally and maliciously incited another Black man to act out of character so he could ruin his big moment. Chris is jealous of Will plain and simple.
It’s obvious the picture that circulated showing Nicole Kidman with a shocked expression, was a deliberate promotion of a false narrative to paint Will Smith in a dangerous light. The video footage tells an entirely different story. Obviously, no one was afraid that they were next or Will was wilding out uncontrollably for no good reason. No matter what the public believes, power players in that room know why Chris was standing there looking stupid by himself. He’s a jacka$$. Everyone who came out in support of Chris was a self serving comedian with a project to promote. And their only concern was preserving their own right to keep using verbal violence and calling it jokes.
The Academy isn’t worried about Chris Rat suing them. They have documentation of the apology they had to issue because of him in 2016. In addition to punching down on Jada and insulting Will about being snubbed for Concussion, he did a racist skit with Asian children that caused a backlash from the Asian community. He doubled down by insulting the South Asian community right after getting slapped this year. He also received backlash when he hosted in 2005 and made fun of Jude Law so incessantly that Sean Penn addressed it on stage. He isn’t suing anyone, because there is plenty of dirt on him that is in the public record.
The people who are defending Chris now would stop immediately if they knew what a real POS he is. Cheated on his ex wife repeatedly, until she divorced him and took half. Then denied one of their children because the adoption wasn’t final, even though she had been with them since infancy and was 6 years old. All because he didn’t want to pay child support. All he cares about is the money.
The nerve of Chris to try to disparage Jada’s career, his highest grossing films are the ones where she also co-starred. The Madagascar franchise. But Jada was also in the Matrix Franchise and many other movies and shows including Hawthorne where she starred as a head nurse. You don’t have to be “invited” to the Oscars when you are an A-lister. Besides, Jada is a voting member of the Academy. Chris is the hired help mouthing off at people who inspire his jealousy. Loser.