As I’ve said in a few posts now, I believe there’s something “there” with all of these reports about Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck’s marriage trouble. I don’t think it’s gotten to the point where they’re “over” or divorce lawyers have been called, but I do think there’s something off-kilter with them. The fact that TMZ and People Magazine are both piggybacking on In Touch Weekly’s “Bennifer split” report is noteworthy. If none of this was true, I feel certain that J.Lo’s manager Benny Medina would have said something or found a way to shut it down. People’s “sources” are silent, meaning they can’t get Benny on the phone.
The Daily Mail has pointed out that J.Lo liked a “scathing Instagram post” from a relationship coach named Lenna Marsak. The IG post reads, in part, “You cannot build a healthy relationship with someone who lacks integrity and emotional safety.” Yikes. Meanwhile, Us Weekly is getting in the game, and they’re basically saying that yes, Ben and J.Lo are having issues, but they’re not really breaking up.
Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have been spending time apart — but they’re not calling it quits just yet.
“Jen and Ben are having issues in their marriage,” an insider exclusively tells Us Weekly of Lopez, 54, and Affleck, 51. “They started having issues a few months ago as Jen had started ramping up work commitments and prepping for her tour.”
Lopez is set to kick off her This Is Me … Live tour next month in Orlando. The tour comes after the February release of her ninth album, This Is Me … Now, which was accompanied by a film titled This Is Me … Now: A Love Story.
“Jen is very focused on work,” the source tells Us. “They are on two completely different pages most of the time.”
The insider adds that Lopez recently looked at a home in Los Angeles that she’s saying is intended as an investment property. A second source notes that Affleck has been staying at a place in L.A. that is separate from the couple’s usual home.
The second insider also confirms that the twosome are not currently planning to separate, while a third source notes that the duo are working on their relationship. Us Weekly has reached out to both reps for comment.
I would also point to “a few months ago” as when there seemed to be fissures in their marriage. Like, the photos from February’s This Is Me… Now premiere were not great. While Ben appeared in the documentary (and he was very supportive), he genuinely seemed over it by the premiere. He looked like he really didn’t want to be there. Now, all that being said… they’re both in their 50s, they’re older and wiser and they don’t have to be joined at the hip. They knew what they were getting this time around. It’s more than likely that they’re just going through a difficult stage and they’ll work it out.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid, Cover Images.
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- HOLLYWOOD, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, USA – FEBRUARY 13: Ben Affleck and wife Jennifer Lopez (JLo) wearing a Zuhair Murad Couture gown with Joseph Saidian and Sons vintage Van Cleef & Arpels diamond earrings and A.Jaffe diamond rings arrive at the Los Angeles Premiere Of Amazon MGM Studios’ ‘This Is Me…Now: A Love Story’ held at the Dolby Theatre on February 13, 2024 in Hollywood, Los Angeles, California, United States.,Image: 846503912, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: , Model Release: no, Pictured: Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez, JLo, Credit line: Xavier Collin / Image Press Agency / Avalon
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- HOLLYWOOD, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, USA – FEBRUARY 13: Ben Affleck and wife Jennifer Lopez (JLo) wearing a Zuhair Murad Couture gown with Joseph Saidian and Sons vintage Van Cleef & Arpels diamond earrings and A.Jaffe diamond rings arrive at the Los Angeles Premiere Of Amazon MGM Studios’ ‘This Is Me…Now: A Love Story’ held at the Dolby Theatre on February 13, 2024 in Hollywood, Los Angeles, California, United States.,Image: 846504026, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: , Model Release: no, Pictured: Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez, JLo, Credit line: Xavier Collin / Image Press Agency / Avalon
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- HOLLYWOOD, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, USA – FEBRUARY 13: Jennifer Lopez (JLo) wearing a Zuhair Murad Couture gown with Joseph Saidian and Sons vintage Van Cleef and Arpels diamond earrings and A.Jaffe diamond rings arrives at the Los Angeles Premiere Of Amazon MGM Studios’ ‘This Is Me…Now: A Love Story’ held at the Dolby Theatre on February 13, 2024 in Hollywood, Los Angeles, California, United States.,Image: 846505624, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: , Model Release: no, Pictured: Jennifer Lopez, JLo, Credit line: Xavier Collin / Image Press Agency / Avalon
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- Celebrities at the Los Angeles premiere of ‘This Is Me… Now: A Love Story’ Featuring: Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck Where: Los Angeles, California, United States When: 13 Feb 2024 Credit: Ryan Hartford/INSTARimages.com
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- Celebrities at the Los Angeles premiere of ‘This Is Me… Now: A Love Story’ Featuring: Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck Where: Los Angeles, California, United States When: 13 Feb 2024 Credit: Ryan Hartford/INSTARimages.com
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- Celebrities at the Los Angeles premiere of ‘This Is Me… Now: A Love Story’ Featuring: Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck Where: Los Angeles, California, United States When: 13 Feb 2024 Credit: Ryan Hartford/INSTARimages.com
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- Celebrities at the Los Angeles premiere of ‘This Is Me… Now: A Love Story’ Featuring: Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck Where: Los Angeles, California, United States When: 13 Feb 2024 Credit: Ryan Hartford/INSTARimages.com
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- Celebrities at the Los Angeles premiere of ‘This Is Me… Now: A Love Story’ Featuring: Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck Where: Los Angeles, California, United States When: 13 Feb 2024 Credit: Ryan Hartford/INSTARimages.com
I don’t want to believe this, I refuse.
Same, I actually really root for them. I don’t know, maybe I’m naive and a loser but I really believe in true love and for those people to go through what they did with a broken engagement and eventually start families and then find each other later in life? I’m sold.
I was hoping for the best but I think they are done. It seems like most of the time Ben looks tired and over it. Unless they both make some big changes it’s done.
I think Ben needed a breather from the constant love performance and Jen panicked and doubled down which didn’t help so she threw a tantrum. I know it from my teenage relationship dramas and J.lo seems like the type who never get past that phase. Ben should have anticipated it. As someone commented on a previous thread, they don’t seem to know each other.
This. I also think he seemed embarrassed by the whole This is Me Now lovefest. He was embarrassed during the Gigli stuff and embarrassed again. Hopefully they are both older and wiser and can figure out how to navigate it this time.
If they’re in therapy, then that’s probably JLo trying to save the relationship. Ben has a tradition of sabotaging his way out a relationship by causing his partner to break off with him.
I mean couples have issues – the only difference here is that everyone is watching. I hope they work it out – but having everyone know and speculate about it can’t help matters.
You kind of invite the scrutiny when you make an album and film about your relationship. People were still going to be in their business because they’re celebrities, but that stuff definitely didn’t help.
Yeah she’s super driven and focused and he needs a ton of attention. Someone on the other thread that they don’t really know each other and maybe they’re right? Because neither of this is new to any of us who are even casual observers.
As I said, I really hope they work it out but this revelation, if true, does not speak to a relationship built on mutual understanding and acceptance. On the contrary, it feels like the same issues that got them “stuck” in the past and essentially took all the momentum out of their relationship.
On another semi-related note, I cannot stand the constant speculation about Ben’s sobriety. Like, it just feels so gross watching folks countdown to his relapse when by all accounts, he is still sober. It’s a tenuous thread and a battle every day to stay sober guys–the constant speculation and unfounded comments does help.
* does NOT help
Recovering alcoholic here, and I agree the speculation about his sobriety is gross. He’s not out giving interviews claiming he’s sober while slurring his words or behaving erratically so why is anyone questioning it. If he’s working program then he’s working through the his own feelings about their relationship within the principles of his program. Many, many addicts get through really tough times without picking up.
My personal opinion is that JLO and Ben need major couple therapy. For them to get married after 20 years makes me think the candle is still burning but their personalities might not be suitable. Ben has issues with many things as we know. JLO, on the other hand never saw a camera she did not like. Too many info about your love life. Keep it semi private at least. I also believe the bad press about her recent projects might affect the relationship. She might be hard to be around. Face it, she is a accomplish woman in business but too needy in relationship. Maybe they need time out to reassess and not necessary divorcing. I hope they find common ground where they both out there but semi private when it comes to their relationship. She is exhausting and I am on the outside.
Every story and photo of them for the past twenty years always scream to me that they are a mismatched couple. They may feel a strong attraction, but they may as well be on two different planets. Maybe it’s the press and public photos, but I have never seen a photo of them happy that they are together.
This article seemed like a weak counterattack to the previous articles broadcasting the alleged split while smartly acknowledging “some issues in the marriage”. I’m inclined to believe the divorce rumors bc both are actors and would be able to “fake it for the cameras.” While JLo has been hellbent on proving what a great love story this is, Ben has, imo, looked “over it” since those photos of him looking miserable at one of those 2023 award shows were widely mocked on SM. They haven’t looked happy together in when in public for a while now. And I’m not someone who pays close (or much) attention to them but I’ve noticed that.
And then there’s the love letters thing. If I had written love letters to someone, I would consider it private. If the recipient shared it with the whole world, I would feel betrayed and used. That is if she didn’t ask him. If she didn’t ask him if he minded……..I don’t know what she wants. Do you want a close marriage? I wouldn’t want to feel like my partner was using our love for her career. I’m sorry, but I think that is pretty low.
Did anyone see his face when she revealed she had shared his private love letters to her in one of her recent docs? Between them they have 5 kids, but rushed into this marriage and now the kids are going to have to live with the media fall-out. They are both attention loving leos, but seek the attention in different ways and step on each others toes. They were never going to live happily ever after together.
Sharing his private love letters… he had to have known. She had to have told him she wanted to do it. But why was it important for her? Why was sharing them with the world necessary? He should have said “please don’t”, but her need to do that reminds me of Tori Spelling over-sharing about her kids. You can be a media personality and keep what you hold dear for yourself.
She is desperate to control how she is perceived. The “This Is Me” collection feels like she wanted to make one of those documentaries done for public figures at the end of life or after death, but she wanted to make it about how she saw it. Love letters used in biographies inform the mystery about the lives of public figures, and that’s what makes them appealing in biographies, but her sharing them looks self centered and aggrandizing. This quality about her is so annoying. Just make your art. She is fabulous, but it doesn’t seem to be enough. Being with a bottomless pit of neediness is hard. It erases the fabulousness in intimate relationships.
ITA. Lopez has let her endless image management overtake her talent, and that always spells bad news. (She and Madonna should have a very long talk together.) What’s ironic is is that she _can_ act, but instead of putting time into worthwhile movie projects, she’s feeding the hype machine 24/7.
I think it’s just a rough patch and they will pull through. My new theory is he is out of the house due to falling off the wagon. And doing private rehab in the other house.
I do believe Jennifer will fight tooth and nail to keep them together. This is who Ben is, he’s wonderful, sober, and miserable when his addiction blows up. She knows this.
I mean… if my partner publicly hyped our romance as the greatest love of all time, it wouldn’t take long for me to buckle under the expectation of constant, all consuming adoration. Especially if I loved them, especially if I already had some self destructive tendencies. “You’re just gonna disappoint them, you may as well blow it up.”
I hope they both find happiness, together or apart.
Last year, People magazine (which IMO has become kind of sloppy) lost a number of connected/credible workers to The Messenger. The Messenger went defunct, and I believe that some of those workers moved to US Weekly. It seems like they are trying to make US more credible again so I believe that this could be a more accurate report.
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I know that people were skeptical about the reunion but I was rooting for them! Despite the issues they seem to truly love each other. I liked them together in the aughts. Hopefully some privacy, time apart to reflect and counseling can help.
All marriages have “issues”. The big difference is we don’t have separate homes to go to cool off. We face each other and look for a solution.
Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. On the one hand, it might be nice to be able to afford time apart in separate houses so you can think about the issues you’re having. On the other hand, maybe it just makes it easier to call it quits. Personally, I think Jen and Ben are over. He’s an addict who isn’t ready to choose the love of a good woman over his love for booze and gambling.
They are such opposites, always have been. She wants everything public and lives in fantasy, he’s more private and has a lot of darker issues as well. It was a hard bet from the beginning. I feel sorry for the kids.
Agreed. And it’s very much a Sinatra/Gardner thing–they love each other, but simply can’t live together. As well, Affleck has issues galore he needs to handle, and that could take a lifetime–and make him bad marriage material.
I think they’re incompatible and they keep trying to make it work. He has never liked her “in the face” approach but it’s something she likes, and it works for her. At this big age ( 50+) you’ve got recognize that you can’t live your life one way while your partner wants to live another. I also think that she’s angry, hurt and disappointed that she dumped 20million of her own money into that bloated project and it crashed, burned and fire continues to smolder. She’s a little in her feelings AND if he gave her an ” I told you so”,(many people including Jane Fonda told her this was a bad idea) that could be cause for strain also. This is on the both of them, they’re adults, they’ll figure it out.
Aw. Idk why but I was rooting for these crazy kids. 🙁
I’m not sure Ben knows what to do with himself when he’s happy. He’s been hellbent on self-destruction for most of his life, whether he was dealing with gambling, drinking or cheating. I think he’d be happiest spending the rest of his life working and being bachelor. I 100% believe they’re having issues and maybe they aren’t at the point of filing for divorce right now but I just don’t see either of them content with their relationship for much longer.
I do believe this article, I think Ben needs a lot of attention and Jlo is a workaholic, just this year she had an album, film, documentary, then she went on to film a movie, she’s promoting another one right now and touring in a couple of months plus all the promo she’s doing for her side businesses this is a LOT.
I remember her saying her children have to ask to ‘schedule’ in family time with her, she’s that busy.
At the end of the day it’s who she is and they’re just not meant to be
Must be nice to just pick up & go to Paris with your daughter & friends when your marriage is on shaky ground! And Ben picking up & living in a rental. Ben is working in LA & focusing on his kids. But he is in LA. JL will be going on her mini tour ?& will not be home for several months. I thought something was up when JL said she wanted her kids to go on tour with her but made no mention of Ben? If JL wants to work on their marriage, she would cancel these tour dates. If she doesn’t, I think there will be an announcement after her touring ends…
If they’re living apart when they’re still newlyweds they are not going to make it. She’s been obnoxious about their relationship and he has serious addiction issues. It’s her fourth marriage, his second. I’m just sorry for the kids.
It’s early days for any marriage to be having issues of this magnitude.
It was I who said they don’t know each other. They don’t.
They cannot reasonably anticipate each others moods, motivations, responses.
You cannot build what you cannot trust, not just cheating but the knowledge of what you partner will do for you is imperative.
ETA: they can’t even trust why they got married. It’s not love, they don’t even know each other.
So infatuation. The documentary she pushed is like, is this why? She had it in her head it was true love? It was romance across the ages?
There’s no such thing. It’s all work, marriage, you have to remember why you chose each other every day, even when they drive you mad.
Let’s hope it’s just a rough patch.
This is absolutely believable and predictable – both people are broken in different meaningful ways and send a strong “we fix each other and its us against the world – no one understands our love” vibe. They don’t fix each other, they are still who they are and neither of them is capable of fixing themselves, much less the other person. This is a romantic fiction each of them pull out and lean on when they need a fairytale to get though the reality of life. It’s not destiny – it’s drama for drama’s sake from two highly imaginative, nice, but very unbalanced individuals. What is sad is they are both in their 50’s now – and the mistakes and self deception keep rolling on like they are in their 20’s. JLo – in particular – seems particularly manic with the show/documentary/album thing she is trying to make happen. The self absorption is – a lot.
Pot said to kettle,“You cannot build a healthy relationship with someone who lacks integrity and emotional safety.”
Could all of this be a PR stun from J.Lo’s team? I meant for months people has been talked about T&T and Queen B’s counry album, not Jennifer’s many projects.
Frankly, she’s scary to me. She’s Elizabeth Taylor 2.0. She’s had Ben now and next?
And Ben will move into his younger date stage or alternatively try it with Jennifer again.
Hmm, she’s always struck me as Joan Crawford, 2.0. Living for her image, lots of husbands, living in a self-created celebrity fantasy–tons of similarities there…
I doubt Jennifer G wants him back at this point. She’s over it.
Ben is walking back because of her recent career failures and he doesn’t want to be tied to it.
Ben is a weak, weak man.
I actually think this is part of it. Not all of it, but part.
She’s had a rough few months. Her magnum opus triptych flopped hard, after she sank a bunch of her own money into it. Then there’s the Diddy association. I can see Ben looking at all that and getting the ick, as it were.
But I think them being fundamentally different people is the real problem. That’s probably become very apparent over the last few months amongst all the turmoil. Things got too hard and too real and now he’s bailing.
Maybe it’s that on some personal level but they would each have an entourage (hers is probably huge) and he’d have advisors and managers telling him to separate his brand from hers. It’s a business decision at the very least but possibly also personal like you noted.
I think JLo must be exhausting. She needs a constant supply of adulation and adoration to keep her enormous ego afloat. Sure it’s all fun and games until reality hits with a thud that she can’t turn it off — it’s like she’s addicted to being in big storybook love when some days you just want to watch TV alone in your pajamas.
I think both of them are emotionally immature when it comes to their relationships. Both are needy, and their demands for attention and adoration seem bottomless. That adoration and attention are easy and obvious when you are the in the honeymoon stage of a relationship, but mature people also understand that daily, steady, mature relationships also include groceries, cleaning the house, Target runs, kids’ last minute school projects, etc. The boring stuff you have to do when you are tired, maybe at the end of your rope, but you still love each other. (I understand that neither of these people are cleaning or grocery shopping, but they still must have their version of daily, boring demands on their time).
When a man is looking *anywhere but at you* WHILE HE’S KISSING YOU, he doesn’t care.
I am rooting for these two. I just wish she would have laid low this time around. No need to release the album and documentary/visuals for the album. She could have laid low, promoted Delola (which I think is delish) made some movies and just enjoyed their marriage.
I also think he is more bothered by her career “decline” and backlash more than she is. He immediately thinks that her career is a reflection on his and her being ridiculed will lower his celebrity status. He’s afraid of the Gigli effect. That’s why he wants a woman who is either on the sidelines (a la Garner) or powerhouse (when he got back with JLo cause she was riding on a high wave when he got back with her). She had performed at the superbowl, was getting praise for Hustlers and was doing well with some single dance hits. He doesn’t want to be ridiculed again and have to work hard to be taken seriously again.
They are incompatible and should have never gotten back together.
JLo’s known sense of entitlement and well-known demands (don’t speak to her directly, multipage riders for her dressing rooms, hotels, including new toilet seats, etc. when touring/performing) must be wearing for a guy who schlubs around in old T shirts to Dunkin Donuts & gets his own coffee.