Here’s Jessica Simpson out last night in Los Angeles after having dinner with friends. Yes, those are her breasts, and yes, they are jacked to her chin. Now, as I’ve mentioned before, I have big boobs. They’re about Jessica’s size, and they are more trouble then they’re worth. I’m sure this dress would look really cute on someone with a smaller chest. But with Jessica’s rack – and she’s obviously wearing some kind of push-up something under there – the whole ensemble makes her look trashy. That’s the thing about big boobs – you can go from classy to hooker-wear with about an inch less of fabric.
So, that was what I thought of the ensemble and Jessica’s oft-discussed rack. It’s not her, it’s the dress, basically. Or, “Jessica needs to learn how to cover the girls better.” But some people just like to pick on Jessica. And Us Weekly is there to compile it all:
Once again, Jessica Simpson’s body has become the butt of Internet jokes. On Wednesday, she went out to eat — and bloggers couldn’t help but notice her chest.
TMZ.com said the “former singer … looked really stuffed” at the organic restaurant, adding that “Jess knows natural free-range breasts are much better for you than ones pumped full of preservatives.”
JustJared cracked that she put her “breast foot forward” during the outing.
Celeb gossip site bild — which said Simpson was rocking “one serious cleavage” — joked that she had a “XXL” bust size.
X17 also noticed that Simpson’s “boobs looked even more bodacious than usual” and speculated that the singer was either “wearing a wonderbra or “gained a few pounds (all in her boobs).”
Simpson probably isn’t amused by the chatter.
In October – after a Fox NFL Sunday spoof mocked her weight by saying she’d make a good “defensive tackle” – she Twittered: “I will never understand why people attack for a laugh.”
[From Us Weekly]
I just looked at Jessica’s Twitter page, and she hasn’t said anything about the criticism/comments. Yet. But I did find this hilarious tweet that kind of made me fall in love with Jessica: “Dear elderly man at the gym: its hard 4 me 2 keep composure whilst punching at chipmunk speed when ur ball sack spills out of ur wind shorts.” I’m still giggling at that one, honestly. The “chipmunk speed” reference is about Jessica’s new workout – boxing. She recently tweeted: “Boxing has changed my life! I have so much energy and it has cured my insomnia. Although I don’t think I can get out of bed I’m SO sore.” So, Jessica is happy and she’s got a new workout and she’s probably in love with Billy Corgan. So maybe that’s why she pushed her boobs out?
Jessica also tweeted about her shoes, which are from her own clothing-and-shoe collection. I think they’re ugly, but here’s a close-up of them from Jess’s twit-pic:
Jessica Simpson in LA on January 13, 2010. Credit: GHOST/Fame Pictures. Above twit-pic from Jessica’s Twitter.
I am not a Jessica hater. Briefly met her and she’s a sweetie. Her boobs are her boobs. But, I worked at Dillard’s where her shoes sell very well, and, frankly, they look like hooker-wear.
Poor Jessica, it’s either her boobs, bad taste in men or her bubble brain.
Much like the rest of her, her tits are fake.
I was expecting a different picture when I scrolled down, something that looked like a boob explosion, like Mariah.
She looks fine to me. But yeesh, those shoes. I don’t get the deal with what are essentially open-toed boots. Everyone’s wearing the disgusting things.
Alot of her shoes are pretty ugly, but I once saw some cute purple heels by her, I just cant find them again.
Sometimes I go on Zappos and scroll through the pictures of her shoes and marvel at how high the heels are on almost all of them are. I would surely break my ankle.
I can think of 100 more celebs worse than Jessica to bag on.
She looks like a 2 bit hooker and I wish she would dress like a lady.
I actually like some of her shoes but not on me…too old to wear 5 inch heels. Her handbags are very nice.
I don’t like those shoes at all, especially with that outfit, but some of the boots from her line I really like. And yeah, her nipples aren’t about to pop out, so I think the dress is fine. Show them off before they rest in your lap, that’s my motto! (I’m larger chested myself…but not that large!)
those shoes are prehistoric insect warrior startrek style. ick.
I always feel defensive now when people attack her. I just don’t want them to- she really hasn’t done anything to anyone. She’s just a sweet dumb blonde, and she doesn’t try to be anything else.
Even her media frenzy days, I feel were orchestrated by Papa Simpson. And if I am right, then her daddy’s monstrous behavior even caused her marriage to fail. Would make me feel even sorrier for her.
@ Firestarter….. ITA!
I don’t mind Jess, but those shoes are hideous!!
At least she wears her own line. Seriously have you ever seen JLo in any of her craptastic ghetto gear.
Relli: good point.
Jess has the BEST handbag pr0n of all of the celebrities! Love her handbag style.
Bardzo ładna kobieta!!!
i wish she had real friends and i wish she’d lay of the make up … she’s such a natural beauty…
I like her shoes,I like her handbags and I like Jessica!
@juiceinla–I totally agree with you.
Jessica looks like a normal cute blonde from Texas…leave her alone!
Doesn’t she always dress like that? Not sure why this got special notice. I’ve seen a lot worse, at least they seem contained.
The shoes kind of remind me of rattlesnakes attacking her feet…
She looks fine to me. I never mind a curvy woman tastefully showing off her cleavage. If you want to rag on someone’s inappropriate boobage, there is always Amy Winehouse, or Lindsay Lohan.
I don’t care for the shoes at all.
Bless her, at least she followed the legs OR boobs rule. I actually think her cleavage is fine, it’s not like they’re hanging out and they’re probably well secured anyway!
Shoes are grim though.
She used to have appropriate boobs to fit her size when she was married, then, about the time of her “Dukes” movie her boobs amped up & Daddy started talking about them. In this pic her eyes look different, Kinda cat-eyed. Hope that’s not another “improvement.”
I’m sure that purse cost a lot, due to the label, but daaayam it is so ugly!
i don’t think her cleavage is that bad really. yes she has big boobs but you know if she went around wearing turtlenecks then they’d look even huger. as a big boobed person it’s hard to find the line so i’d definitely cut her some slack for that dress
With girls like that and as young as she is, they look fabulous – I’d be taking them out for walks too. Not in those butt-ugly shoes, but I’d be showing off my twins – do it while y’can! And look – in case she needs flotation devices, they’re right there’s no cord to have to fish around for. They could save her life!
That handbag is LV-gasmic!!
“Faboobies”!!!!
I don’t like the shoes she has on, but I have liked some of her collection. I think she looks fine, except the shoes make her legs look stumpy.
I know a lot of people hate their big boobs…but I hate how broad shouldered I am with NO boobs. Think Kate Hudson with Hilary Duff’s shoulders!!!! That dress wouldn’t look cute on me.
I would like to have boobs, they look like fun. But I do understand how some women have too much of a good thing and end up with back problems because of it.
She looks fine to me but I do agree that her shoes are ugly. However, there are other shoes from her line that are really cute and affordable
I like JS, I wish people will leave her alone. She’s a sweet person and she’s never done anything bad or mean to anyone
I think Jessica is harmless. I’m pretty sure Nick has stated Papa Perv was the major reason for the bust up. I think those shoes she has on would look sexy over my shoulders.
Whether or not those shoes sell, they are ugly! But I like Jessica ~ sweet and dumb, but I’d rather have that than mean and smart! But, Jess? Wear better shoes… those are SO last year!
The boobs don’t bother me, but those shoes sure do. Talk about fug!!
And unlike most posters here I find J.Simp annoying and a waste of space and wish that she and her equally annoyng family would disappear from the celeb world.
@24- I know right?? Her face has that side-stretched, tightened look to it. Hopefully it’s just the angle though, hate to think she’s messing with her face already!
And is it just me, or does she always look tipsy when she’s in heels? I mean like she’s going to fall, not drunk.
Aww your poor puppies Kaiser. Never letting them see the light of day is a shame. Be proud of them babe! Women pay a lot of money to have boobs like us!
FYI – Big boobs and high neck clothing dont go! You need low cut to minimize the size of your boobs!
Hate to tell ya but Jess is wearing the right cut for her shape.
Way to go Jess…if you’ve got it, flaunt it!
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I like her. She’s a sweet dumb blond, as someone else said. She has a certain sadness to her that makes me root for her. So leave her boobies alone. But for f***s sake, J., lose those awful shoes.
The Kate Beckinsale story irks me to no end. Puh-lease. She lives for her appearance…this chick wears heels to the fair. A lot of these lists get made but Kate actually went and made a VIDEO for this one. So don’t pretend to be modest.
I rue the day those gladiator shoes came into style. They can’t be out of style fast enough for me.
And Jess is Jess. She doesn’t pretend to be overly intelligent, the best dresser, or even the best singer in the world. It appears that she is a kind person, albeit somewhat needy, with daddy issues, but with good intentions. So sue her, she is a lot like the rest of us.
I fully expected to see nipples flying everywhere. This caused a stir? I think she looks great, people are looking for a reason to talk s*** at this point.
I don’t know about you people here but in my world, a hooker look is a compliment because most women can’t pull it off.
If I had boobs like hers I would let them see the light of the sun as often as I can.
Yeah, I’ve got some tig ol’ bitties myself, but with a 5’10” frame to balance them out. I understand sometimes there is just too much boob for the dress. If she weren’t wearing a push up bra or whatever we wouldn’t be having this discussion. The shoes are awful though -rather see some peep toe pumps and a different color jacket/cute cardigan.
I’m glad I’m not the only one that hates those kind of butt ugly shoes!
Jessica is a beautiful chic with the most wonderful boobs. I love and admire her body.
Those are nice.
She looks like her father in drag in that top photo.
the shoes are hideous. but i think she looks beautiful in the dress. no hookerish at all. if you got em flaunt em. women pay to have her boobs. women pay lots of money to have trashy looking boobs. i think her boobs look good. btw my boobs are twice her size and natural. when i loose weight they are about her size or a little bigger.
ROTFLMFAOOOOOOOO @ Codzilla
I think she looks cute as hell, though that is a bit too much boobage. I’m busty & boob shy.
She looks fine to me, it’s not as if she pulled a Mariah. But the shoes! I too don’t get the appeal of those open toe booties. It’s so tacky to me.
I’m busty and boob-shy, too, Jen. I don’t agree with Kylie. I think that when you have ’em, you don’t need to expose them. The itty bitty titty committee members needs to show cleavage just to attract the attention that mine get without the show.
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