I turned 40 earlier this year and as I’ve noticed the changes in my body over the past few years, menopause has been on my mind a lot. I really appreciate the celebrities like Naomi Watts, Sofia Vergara, Halle Berry, and Brooke Burke who have spoken up about their experiences and how our bodies change as we age.
Kate Winslet, who turns 49 on October 5, was a guest on the September 10 episode of the podcast How to Fail with Elizabeth Day. During her appearance, a listener asked about ways to “rekindle her sex drive” with her boyfriend. Kate responded by talking about the how testosterone levels in a woman’s body depletes as they age. She also shared her experience with testosterone therapy, which she credited with making her feel sexy again.
Kate Winslet is getting candid about her sex drive. The Lee actress, 48, said during a Sept. 10 episode of the How to Fail with Elizabeth Day podcast that her libido got a major boost after undergoing testosterone replacement therapy. While answering a listener’s relationship question about how to rekindle her sex drive with her longtime boyfriend, Winslet gave advice and opened up about her health journey.
“Sometimes women have a real dip in libido because there might be stuff going on with their thyroid. There could also be stuff going on with your level of testosterone,” the Oscar winner said.
“A lot of people don’t know this, but women have testosterone in their body, when it runs out — like eggs — it’s gone,” Winslet added. “And once it’s gone you have to replace it, and that is something that can be done and you’ll feel sexy again … I know.”
Winslet also suggested that the listener should have her thyroid levels and testosterone levels checked: “Those things could have a direct impact on how you’re actually feeling. It’s not your fault, our bodies are weird and they behave in strange ways, especially as we get older.”
She continued: “So there could be a dip in those hormonal levels for you that is contributing much more than you think to how you’re feeling about having sex with your boyfriend, so I would definitely go ahead and do that.”
Winslet also noted that the listener should be easy on herself while navigating the situation.
The Titanic star also spoke about embracing body positivity during her podcast appearance, saying, “We have to own [our bodies], this is the thing.”
“We’re so conditioned, women, in our 40s to think, ‘Oh well I’m creeping closer to the end.’ You think you’re going into menopause and you’ll stop having sex, your boobs are going to sag and your skin’s going to go crepy,” she explained. “First of all, so what? And secondly, it’s just conditioning.”
“I think women as they get older get juicier and sexier and more embedded in their truth of who they are and more powerful, more able to walk through the world and care less and that is an empowering thing,” Winslet said. “I say to my friends all the time, ‘You look amazing.‘ ”
Winslet has been outspoken about aging and her physicality. She previously spoke about being “brave” when it came to on-screen nudity. “I know better than to waste precious energy on criticizing my physical self,” she told Vogue in a September 2023 interview.
“I think any woman is better off just saying: I believe in myself. It doesn’t matter what other people think; this is who I am — let’s get on with it,” Winslet said.
Ignoring how she describes women’s bodies as getting “juicier” as they age (WTF does that even mean?!), I have always appreciated Kate’s honesty. How else are we going to find out about potential issues if they’re not actually talked about? This speaks to what I’ve always believed is why we need to destigmatize these topics. Otherwise, we suffer in silence and wonder what’s “wrong” with us when it doesn’t have to be like that. Has anyone had any experience with this? I’ve read up on hormone therapy during menopause but always thought that estrogen and progestin were the main focuses. Of course, as with everything, speak with your doctor and consider any potential side effects.
You can listen to Kate’s episode of How to Fail here.
photos credit: Aissaoui Nacer/Backgrid, Phil Lewis / Wenn / Avalon, Julie Edwards / Avalon
My body makes almost no testosterone at this point. My other hormones are still cranking along, but you need testosterone for all sorts of reasons. I started taking it last fall, and it’s made an incredible impact in how I feel. I take a shot weekly-self administered-and my levels are back to normal. I have more energy, I’m happier, and my libido is definitely healthier.
There are only two downsides: 1) my skin is not as dry, but it is a little more sensitive. I had to add an acne wash once a day, especially if I’m hitting the sauna (PanOxyl, let sit on the skin for 1 minute or more) 2) I think I have a little more facial peach fuzz, but it’s faint and nothing dermaplaning every month or so can’t handle.
Are you in the USA?
For us in the UK testosterone isn’t given to women in tablets or shots (only gel or patches, like HRT).
Yes, I am.
Me too. I make almost no testosterone. Literally zero. My insurance doesn’t cover it, but it is worth every penny to supplement. I have it in compounded cream.
I’m on other hormones but no Dr I’ve seen will give me testosterone. I know I need it as I’m educated in hormone therapy.
THIS! 👆👏
I’m even intersex, I have been in the pits of hell from perimenopause because after 2 years of me pulling my hair due to the wild symptoms the GP Dr finally prescribed me HRT but I was told in no uncertain terms that testosterone was out of the question.
I’m still fighting to get it prescribed. I guess Kate is privileged so she got a Dr who gave it to her.
In the UK if you’re not a man it’s very, very difficult to get any treatment with testosterone.
It’s like already thin people getting ozempic. I have hormone issues which prevent me from losing weight (I was on a liquid diet for 6 weeks – no juices or sugar – very low calorie, and I lost 2kg when I’m morbidly obese. Again, I don’t qualify. 🙄 Rich Hollywood people can get anything they want.
Do you have doctors that specialise in menopause? As well ass my GP, I go to a place called https://wellfemme.com.au/ (obviously they are specific to Australia) where they only deal with menopause. It’s all telehealth. They have great resources on their website and monthly webinars with information on a whole range of topics.
Hi Seaflower,
We do have clinics that specialise in menopause treatments but they’re all private in the UK and treatments are unaffordable for many women.
Seaflower, do those drs prescribe testosterone?
I actually see an athletic training group-it’s still doctors and medically sound advice but they are looking at you differently. I was struggling to gain muscle/lose fat, and a friend of mine recommended I get my hormones checked by someone who wasn’t just thinking about my levels against a chart, but thinking more holistically. My levels were rock bottom, but it wasn’t just “part of getting older” to them.
I do cash pay, but it’s not terribly expensive (less than a daily Starbucks habit) and so worth it.
would you be willing to give info so we could find this group? [understand if you’d rather not! but it sounds so helpful]
@KT-
Mine is local to FOCO outside ATL, BUT I would look for “athletic hormone treatments” or something similar in your local community.
(Mine is Infinite Athlete-they do hormone replacements, infusions, lab panels, weight loss, body analysis, etc etc. I get labs every 3-4 months and body comp/eval every 2 months, to evaluate impact of treatments and monitor overall health. I pay out of pocket and it really sucks that there are millions of people out here who don’t have or can’t afford care beyond the bare minimum-and often not even that. We should expect to have doctors CARE if we’re tired, etc but so often they don’t.)
@TheHufflepuffLizLemon: Awesome suggestion, thank you for sharing!
While I haven’t tried testosterone, I did start HRT/MRT earlier this summer. Estrogen is so important for brain, bone, heart and even cancers – any woman over the age of 50 or going through menopause should have a conversation with the doctor and if that doctor says no, find another one. The tide is changing and I had such a great conversation with a doctor for my annual exam, but there are many doctors out there that are 10-15 years behind in what they should be telling women. Personally I go through telehealth for my MRT and I hope to die with a estrodial patch on – women live longer in poorer health and we need to fight this.
My doc started me on HRT during peri-menopause to help deal with daily migraines. They were so bad I couldn’t drive, meaning I couldn’t work. HRT did reduce the number of migraines, no question. I’ve been taking HRT for at least 15 years (70 now, still taking). Remember though, HRT can increase the possibility of breast cancer, especially if your breast tissue is dense.
Never heard of testosterone treatments, but isn’t progestin pretty much the same? I have to check up on that, because I thought HRT was a balance – I take two pills, one increasing estrogen (higher mg) and I always thought the progestin was another name for testosterone , that’s why it had lower mg).
Hi Gail,
No, unfortunately testosterone is a completely different hormone and cannot be replaced by progesterone.
I remember when I turned 40 I had my first hot flash. It was the beginning of the end. But seriously the changes don’t get you down. Remember mind over matter. Someone told me the last two years before the last period are the worst and it’s true. Don’t worry, you will sleep again, be less edgy, be more in control…there is light at the end of the tunnel.
This isn’t true for everyone unfortunately. After my periods stopped I had worse and worse hot flashes & night sweats. I didn’t get a full nights sleep for over 5 years. At least 10 night sweats per night and hot flashing during day every 10 minutes for HOURS> I wanted to k!ll myself or someone, anyone. HRT saved my sanity and my life. I will never stop taking HRT. I wish it had gone the way you heard from someone that it does. But it was definitely a horror show for me.
I used to play competitive roller derby for many years. Once I stopped, my T levels were in the single digits. I’ve been getting hormone replacement pellets inserted subcutaneously since 2018. It reduced my chronic pain to almost none. I started getting estrogen and progesterone about a year ago. It has all made a huge difference in my life. I’m in the US. I have a provider that uses bio- te bio identical hormone replacement. It’s kind of like a chain. If you google it, you should be able to find a provider. Good luck all!
ETA: I pay out of pocket. My insurance sucks.
For those in the US, hormone specialist Dr. Lindsey Berkson shares a lot of excellent research and info on her website, and in her book Hormone Deception.
speaking as a woman and a physician, I’m not keen on T for postmenopausal women. Certainly not for the bad side effects-moodiness, beard and mustache hair. I don’t want to grow a penis, either.
actually it’s your androgens that become dominant after menopause (testosterone being an androgen) because you stop producing estrogen and progesterone.
I’m a huge advocate for vaginal estrogen for just about every woman in menopause and beyond. it reduces the chance of UTI, makes sex a lot more fun and in general keeps you just a bit more “juicy” down there. T does not.
also that thing with the itchy ears?? that’s a THING. and a dab of estrogen cream really helps.
@maisie Wondering if I can ask you something. I went through menopause about 6 years ago (had it super early). I was one of the lucky ones with almost zero symptoms. However, my muscle loss and weight gain is impossible to budge. My docs don’t want to give me hormones because they say I lucked out in my symptomless (mostly) meno and don’t want to disrupt what is going on (I haven’t had hormone levels checked except thyroid bc I’ve been hypo for many years/on meds). But wondering if I should try anyways just for the weight loss?
I turned 43 yesterday and I feel as horny as usual. I actually pay more attention to men than before, because I used to be more shy 🙂