Teri Hatcher is promoting her new Christmas movie, How to Fall in Love by Christmas, which premieres this week on Lifetime. She was on Sherri Shepherd’s show a little while ago when she talked about doing standup comedy, which I didn’t realize about her, about aging and about dating. A lot of women over 50 have opted out of dating due to the diminishing pool and general frustration, however we’re seeing more representation with shows like The Golden Bachelor/Bachelorette and Netflix’s The Later Dates. Teri made a joke about dating as an older woman that is relatable.
Teri Hatcher has offered her thoughts on dating now that she’s 59 years old, saying in a recent interview that it’s “just not that fun anymore.”
During a Tuesday appearance on the “Sherri” daytime talk show, the “Desperate Housewives” star shared how her dating experience has been.
Hatcher jokingly said, “I don’t date much anymore, because I used to date, and you’d look across the table at the guy and you’d think, ‘OK, I wonder if we’re going to end up in bed together,’ and now I look across the table and I just think, ‘When am I going to have to change this guy’s diapers?’”
In response, host Sherri Shepherd made a suggestion to spice things up for Hatcher: dating younger men.
“There are so many men on this set who have watched you throughout your career — and they have crushes on you,” Shepherd quipped.
Hatcher said she wouldn’t be open to it because she would have to worry about her appearance, adding, “I just don’t care.” After some back-and-forth, though, the actor agreed she would be open to giving it a try if she found the right guy.
“Girl, I’ve got about 10 of them I can introduce you to,” Shepherd replied.
Hatcher has been married twice: to Marcus Leithold from 1988-1989 and Jon Tenney from 1994-2003. She and Tenney share a daughter, Emerson Tenney.
Although Hatcher may be hesitant to date, a dating expert told HuffPost UK earlier this year that dating over 50 could be the most fun one has in their life.
According to relationship coach Dr. Marie Thouin, it’s a “common misconception that people are not likely to find meaningful love over 50.”
On the topic of aging, Teri said that she’s “happy to still be here.” When Sherri asked her if there was a difference turning 60 vs. her thirties and forties, Terri said “there’s a lot of acceptance that comes with it. That is just grace. I feel like when we’re young we’re so hard on ourselves. The expectation of it to be something other than what it is, is lessened. For all the times that my shoulder hurts and I can’t party anymore… I just feel like it’s a lot of relief.” I can relate to that so much! Sh-t hurts more but I’m still here and I’m grateful.
Later in that segment with Sherri, Teri said that she has a cat who jumps on her when she’s learning French on Duolingo, probably because the cat likes the sounds of French. She called it “better than any date.” That’s adorable! Sherri also hilariously tried to convince Teri to date younger guys, emphasizing that you know what you like at this age and guys appreciate hearing it. Teri said she didn’t want to have to try to keep up with a younger guy, but that she was open to it. I checked Terri’s Instagram and I question whether she’s telling the truth about not having a boyfriend though. There’s a fit handsome dude in her pics from her latest vacation and a shadow photo of the two of them holding hands.
As for Teri’s reasons for not wanting to date, my mom told me her best friend said something similar – she didn’t want to divorce her sh-tty husband because if she was with another guy she would have just have his dirty underwear to wash and put away. Women are fed up and many womenno longer want that caretaker role. That’s part of reason we’re seeing a rise in “gray divorces.” That said, I think it’s possible to meet someone you can have fun and romance with at any age. I met a great guy I’m very happy with, but I’m not going to act like the process before I met him was easy. Also, the negative stories about dating and relationships always get magnified by social media because those are the stories that get attention. People sometimes ask me why we don’t run more positive stories and the answer is that no one will comment, like or share those. It’s the same with dating – the horror stories get elevated because of how shocking they are, but the happy endings just get a shrug. That said, it’s so cool that there are Christmas movies and dating shows about older people finding love.
Here’s the interview! Teri talks about dating around minute four and about aging around minute six. I know she’s not everyone’s favorite person but I like Terri.
photos credit: IMAGO/Frederic Kern/Avalon, Dave Starbuck/Future Image/Cover Images, PA Images/INSTARimages
I wonder if these young girls who get involved with mature (mostly physically, rarely emotionally) men also think about changing their diapers? or maybe just that their partners don’t have much time left on earth. Teri should change her approach.
Nah…. I’m the same mind as Terri (and a bit older). Also, I’ve been there as a caretaker (and yes, toileting incl. for a parent with vascular dementia and aphasia for almost 10 yrs), and I have NO desire to go there again.
I also will not be a “nurse with a purse”. Men in my age range (I’m mid 60s) *mostly* (not all, but it seems “most”) want women 10-15 yrs younger as their “trophy”. Men in their mid to late 70s, and up (88 was the oldest) hit on me), and while some *seem* fit, well… see above. Yes, I know we all have/will have health issues as we age; once you start talking and hear all the things that pop up (or don’t!), yeah, no.
While the companionship, if I do meet someone, would be lovely, dating sucks at this age lol.
I think about this when i see very tall or big guys. That will require professional care for lifts etc to bed and toileting.
The real reason old dudes date young women – she’s still strong enough to help him get up from the toilet.
100% true, my mom lost my dad about 10 years ago. She was in a widows group for awhile. And all the womens biggest complaint that men 65 and older only wanted to date women no older than 36. I am talking 80 year olds that wanted a 35 year old girlfriend. I would bug her to try dating and she was never interested. She nursed my dad passing from cancer. She was not going through that ever again. Also, she loves her freedom to travel, put whatever she wants on TV, go to to all the social events my Dad, who was anti-social. Refused to attend.
She finds companionship through her friends and church and is healthy as a bull. So she has lots of years to enjoy being a happy single widow.
There is that old saying, after a certain age either you are a nurse or a purse.
My mom was widowed at 56. Dad died of cancer and she was his caretaker (and had to still run his business). When asked if she was going to marry again she told them no, she didn’t want to take care of an old man. I feel the same way. I love my freedom of not having to answer to someone (divorced at 53 from a needy spouse).
My husband s uncle married a much younger woman, 42 and 60. She made it a topic of every conversation that she was going to eventually be his caregiver so she was entitled to spend, spend. She became ill and died first and he assisted in caring for her.
I mean, maybe the guy’s looking at her across the table and wondering when he’ll have to change *her* diaper.
it’s also not that uncommon men will leave and divorce a woman if she has a serious or terminal illness. They don’t stick around when it’s the wife that is ill. But the woman will be there to hold their hand when they pass.
And of course not all men, but I read enough it skews more one gender than another.
I don’t think many men think that way. They’re not socialized to think that way.
So sweet of Sherri to look out for Teri. Hope Teri at least has some fun. But no judgement if she doesn’t want that either!
Also- isn’t it Gray divorce not gay divorce?
Thanks for that clarification!
My typo lol!
Ah. A lot of older men specifically go after younger women to have a caregiver, but there is no way of knowing when anyone will have declining health. An 80 year old can zip along relatively unscathed by age and a 40 year old can totally fall apart. But. Lort. I have looked at men my age and older and realized how physically hard it would be to be their caregiver and how their personalities would impact caregiving. The patriarchy that expects women to be lifelong unpaid caregivers to their parents, children/grandchild and spouse/significant others really needs upended.
That cat story was so cute.
My first thought when I read the title was that she automatically assumed she’d have to take on the role of care giver. I thought it was an interesting look into society.
On Later Daters I found Nate’s hard line no at dating an older woman curious. Especially bc children in the home was also a hard line. Until coming here I didn’t even think about the care giver roles in the relationship.
100 agree.
She’s an accomplished woman with loads of money, she dosen’t have to go through this s*
My Dad passed away almost 3 years ago and within 6 months people were asking my mother when she would start dating again. She’s moved in with me, volunteers, works on her hobbies and just generally enjoys her life after taking care of my Dad for almost 30 years as his health slowly declined. She said she has no interest in a new relationship because all older men want is a nurse and a purse and she’s been there, done that.
Another issue with men 55 and older is what I called a “learned helplessness” and can’t cope when they actually have to do things outside of their job.
I work with someone professionally (and is in a same friend group) and his long-term girlfriend broke up with him more than a year ago. Shocked him as he thought they had the perfect relationship, though as you talked more (and honestly by our observations), it wasn’t and he just didn’t see it. Then he had a major medical crisis and he hadn’t taken her off his emergency contact. She helped for one day, then said your family has to now help — during this time he asked if she wanted to get back with him!!?!?!?!
He would complain about getting healthcare, etc. and in ways that confused me as I was like, what your mad about is easily solved. (We haven’t even gotten to insurance yet!) What he wanted was a girlfriend to do it for him.
He is getting better, but is on the hunt for the next girlfriend — despite his health issues and basically as I told him he wants a nurse. (he denies it, but, come on!)
I like Terri as well!
Geez her words about being so hard on ourselves and finally achieving grace struck a cord.
I got everything I wanted but looking back it now, I just see women in their 30’s walking into the buzzsaw/meatgrinder that is society for women in their 30’s & 40’s. I won’t go into details to ruin the surprise for those who aren’t there yet! lol
Fun fact: I went to law school with her first husband. I really didn’t get to know him well, as we were in different small groups but in the same large group as 1Ls. He hung around with a few other people I also hung around with during orientation. He mentioned that he had been married to Teri Hatcher, but didn’t talk about her, and no one pried. He’s a very nice, down-to-earth guy.
I get that she’s mostly joking when she talks about this stuff, but are we really supposed to believe that a rich, successful actress like Terri Hatcher would be changing anyone’s diapers, vs hiring someone to do it?